Thank You, Heavenly
NEW! Theme Song: "Let It Roll" by Divide The Day
SEASON 1
EPISODE 5
Airdate: October 28, 2012
Title: Halloween in Seattle
Homage To Classic TV: Full House (1987-1995)
Special Guest Stars: Jaret Reddick as Rock Star Chuck, Duncan Brannan as Skater Boy Chuck, Tom Kenny as The French Narrator and French Narrator #2, Terry Crews as Jules, Tichina Arnold as Rhonda
Satire: Controversial topics over the past year, Chuck E. Cheese's image revamping
Written by Michael "frostyfreezyfreeze54" Anderson, animated by Paul Wardenson, storyboarded by Rafael Santana, directed by Sam Henderson
SCENE 1
The MacDougal Household
Seattle, Washington
Interior Living Room
It is Halloween night here in Seattle. Sparky is putting the finishing touches on his costume. This year, he's Jerry Sandusky.
SPARKY: I don't know what 2 Chainz is. Is it a toy? A sci-fi novel? Yeah, I think it's a sci-fi novel.
(RK knocks on the door, or kicks it)
SPARKY: RK, ring the doorbell!
RK: Jeez.
(RK rings the doorbell, and the sound it makes is "Monster" by Skillet. Usually, it's "My Time Is Now" by John Cena, but Sparky had it changed for Halloween.)
SPARKY: Man, sick costume RK! On account of the fact that I made it.
RK is James Holmes.
RK: Yeah, whatever. But who's the guy that dyed his hair orange for the occasion?
SPARKY: Well, that IS a nice shade. That's weird.
RK: What?
SPARKY: Buster isn't here yet. Usually he's breaking down the door trying to get in.
RK: Like last year?
(Sparky is taking a shower in this flashback, which was last Halloween. His costume is on the toilet, which we can assume is Casey Anthony. Buster hands the loofah to Sparky, who doesn't seem to mind that a kid is watching him cleanse himself. Buster was so excited, he came too early. He came as Charlie Sheen.)
(disgusted grin) SPARKY: You never learn, do you Buster?
BUSTER: Apparently, no. I'll get the Country Daisy soap next time.
SPARKY: Great. This Lavender Breeze is making me sick. Could you get my back there?
(Buster slowly scrubs Sparky on his back with a scrub brush.)
SPARKY: When I was younger, so much younger than today...
(Buster rings the doorbell)
SPARKY: Oh my God, what the (bleep) hell are you wearing?
Buster is dressed like the new Chuck E. Cheese's mascot, Rock Star Chuck. He even has a plastic guitar.
(imitating Jaret Reddick) BUSTER: I'm Chuck E. Cheese. Let's play kids!
Sparky and RK are scared as Buster sings "Say Cheese, It's Funner!" off-key.
RK: Cheese is NOT funner! It makes me want to kill myself Aurora-style!
SPARKY: RK, dude, where the (bleep) did that come from?
RK: Sorry. I'm just getting in the mood of us dressing like controversial people.
SPARKY: Speaking of which, that's NOT the costume I made for you, Buster!
BUSTER: I hate the one you made me. Jason Russell? Seriously? Besides, this is a controversial topic waiting to explode!
SPARKY: Buster, the only people that care about the Chuck E. Cheese's image change are man-children, 40-year-old fat guys that sit around drinking Mountain Dew with NetZero internet service and people who watch NickMom!
RK: I watched NickMom last night. It was hysterical!
We flash back to RK watching NickMom the night before.
JUDY GOLD: So my son said, "Mom, why is my penis pointing up?" And I told him, "Son, that's your friendship compass. When friends are in the area, your penis points to let you know where they are. It points up because Jesus is your friend." But we both know Jesus would never be friends with my douchebag son! (laughter from the women)
RK: Wow. If I work hard enough, I can be an old comedian entertaining ugly women on a channel that nobody ever watches. I love this block!
We flash forward to the present.
RK: Seriously, I don't know why women hate NickMom.
(long pause)
SPARKY: Hmmm. That being said, Buster, I want you to put on your Jason Russell costume post-pronto!
Buster makes the scoffing sound Claire made in that My Wife and Kids episode when the family had to leave for a wedding. It's called "Get Out" if you want to see the part on YouTube.
SPARKY: You (makes scoffing sound) like that again, I'm gonna choke ya for real.
Minutes later, Buster is in his Jason Russell ensemble. He's wearing a red T-shirt that says "KONY 2012" on the front and "I Jacked It In San Diego" on the back.
SPARKY: See, that's a Halloween costume!
BUSTER: I don't know. I feel like Pee-Wee Herman when he tries to be "down" with the kids. RK, what do you think?
RK: I think you look sexy in whatever you wear.
BUSTER: I knew it.
(Wade rings the doorbell)
SPARKY: You know what Wade, I was wrong. I should've had faith that you could make your own costume.
Wade is Trayvon Martin.
WADE: Thank you, Sparks. I think I've got everything. Gray sweatshirt with hoodie, Ed Hardy T-shirt, gray sweatpants, Run-DMC-themed Adidas shoes, a pack of original Skittles, and a can of AriZona Iced Tea with lemon. On the way over here, some Hispanic guy tried to shoot me, but he missed.
(under his breath) RK: We are going to get in SO MUCH trouble with the public for this.
CAMERAMAN: We're filming!
RK: Don't you think I know that? We're still getting in trouble!
CAMERAMAN: RK, behave or else you're off the set for the rest of the episode.
RK: Fine, I'll behave.
BUSTER: What the (bleep) was that?
SCENE 2
The Neighborhood
Seattle, Washington
Exterior Sidewalk
("Calling All The Monsters" by China Anne McClain playing on a boombox)
Testicular Sound Express is on the hunt for candy, along with every other kid in Seattle. Despite their morally offensive costumes, no one seemed to care much as they knew the kind of guys TSE were. And some didn't even know who they were!
WADE: Are we going to school tomorrow?
(RK slaps Wade in his face)
WADE: RK, do you wanna get snuffed? Nigga, let's shoot our (bleep) right now! You don't want this static!
(the boys are scared now)
WADE: Sorry for going black right there. Once you go black, you never go back. But RK, what the hell?!
RK: We're not going to school, dingus.
WADE: Why?
BUSTER: It's Halloween. We should get to stay up late, eat loads of free candy, and not worry about all those annoying kids in our damn business!
SPARKY: Speaking of kid, where's KG? I thought he was taking you again this year.
RK: Originally. Then he got invited to this super-def party. And in his words, 13-year-olds don't trick or treat so I should just (bleep) off.
WADE: What an ignorant asshole!
RK: I'd punch you right now Wade, but you're right. Lots of kids KG's age trick-or-treat. Too bad he doesn't see it that way.
BUSTER: Where is he now?
RK: Still at home. He wanted to make sure he looked perfect for the party.
We cut to KG at the Jennings household, about to leave for his Halloween party. He's going as Captain America.
KG: This is awesome! I've got my Binaca, sweet Avengers costume, and 15 minutes to spare until the crowd files in. Might as well enjoy some TV while I can.
KG tunes in to FOX News.
BILL O' REILLY: Are kids really safe outside? Police examine this in real-time.
OFFICER MCDIPPLE: We believe people between the ages of 10 and 16 are very susceptible to getting kidnapped or killed by strangers. Especially on Halloween. Gang members come and rape kids, it's all over People.
KG: What?
BILL O' REILLY: Needless to say, kids are simply unsafe when they're not behind closed doors. Examiners point out that most children don't trust anybody they meet for the first time, even YOU!
KG: Oh no! I can't go to this party!
(KG's phone rings. His ringtone is "Dirty Pop (Pop)" by *NSYNC.)
RODNEY: KG, you coming? You said you'd bring the Honey Maid Grahamfuls!
KG: Forget the (bleep) food, Rodney, I've got bigger problems!
KG has a history of being gullible. One week ago, he was at Puget Sound on a sabbatical. He saw his reflection in the water, thought it was him, and nearly drowned trying to save himself. That's why RK never trusts him around the toilet.
SCENE 3
The Neighborhood
Seattle, Washington
Exterior Sidewalk
("Sad But True" by Metallica playing on the boombox)
The boys have an ample supply of candy. They're on their way to their next house when they spot Manny.
SPARKY: Hey Manny!
MANNY: What up, guys?
BUSTER: Roberto Clemente again?
Manny is Roberto Clemente, the Hispanic version of Jackie Robinson who played baseball for the Pittsburgh Pirates his whole career and became the first Latin-American to be inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame. He died in a plane crash on his way to Nicaragua to deliver food and supplies to earthquake victims on New Year's Eve 40 years ago.
MANNY: Of course! He means so much to Puerto Ricans everywhere. Did you know Clemente won the 1966 NL MVP award, earned 15 selections to the All-Star Game, won 12 Gold Gloves, and earned his 3,000th hit the year he died?
(upset) WADE: Yes, Manny.
MANNY: Or that he was the first Hispanic player to win the World Series, the World Series MVP award, and a regular-season MVP award?
(shouting) TESTICULAR SOUND EXPRESS: YES, MANNY!
MANNY: OK. I'll see you guys on Friday.
SPARKY: Someday.
(Buster rings doorbell)
TESTICULAR SOUND EXPRESS: Trick-or-treat!
JULES: Cool, that creepy Penn State guy, that black kid who got shot, the Kony 2012 guy who jacked off, and Jeff Hardy!
RK: Dude, I'm NOT Jeff Hardy!
JULES: A Cabbage Patch Kid on crack? Just kidding, you're that guy who killed a bunch of people in Colorado!
RK: Yeah. (rolls eyes)
RHONDA: Forgive my husband Jules, he's two grapes short of a fruit salad.
RK: It shows alright.
RHONDA: I'm Rhonda. Happy Halloween. (the boys shake Rhonda's hand) Jules, give them the candy.
JULES: OK. You guys will go nuts for this!
Once the candy is poured into the buckets, the boys seem perplexed by the brand.
WADE: Nickers? What are those?
JULES: It's the same as a Snicker bar, but it's a lot cheaper.
(Rhonda rolls her eyes)
SPARKY: 2 Musketeers? Gravy Ways?
BUSTER: What in the name of Allah are Gravy Ways?
JULES: It's the same as a Milky Way. But it tastes like gravy.
RK: Thanks for the candy, you two. Y'all come back now, you hear?
WADE: You need to stop watching so much Hannah Montana reruns.
(the boys leave as Rhonda talks to Jules behind closed doors)
RHONDA: Gravy Ways? Seriously?
JULES: Rhonda, I hardly like spending money on stuff we keep. So spending money on stuff we'll give away drives me nuts! Besides, not only are they cheaper, they taste just like any candy out there.
RHONDA: Jules, we just moved here. I'm not going to go down as the lady that gave away (takes out a piece of candy) Butterthumbs.
(Rhonda takes her coat and leaves)
JULES: Where are you going?
RHONDA: Out to buy some REAL candy.
(Jules mutters to himself)
The boys seem pretty pissed about the knockoff candy.
BUSTER: If they were going to give me some gravy-flavored candy, why not biscuits as well?
WADE: Shut it, Buster. Just shut it.
RK: Hey, whoa, whoa, hey!
SPARKY: What?
RK: You've got more candy than me.
SPARKY: You're just paranoid.
("Paranoid" by The Jonas Brothers playing in the background)
RK: No, I'm not! Give me the bucket so it can be even!
SPARKY: No way, toupee!
(Sparky and RK struggle over the bucket until it spills)
RK: You bastard! Look what you did!
SPARKY: Me? Your fat-ass wanted more candy!
RK: It's not my fault if things aren't equal!
WADE: My money's on Sparky.
RK: Shut the (bleep) up, brainiac! You and your hippy-dippy black guy garb!
WADE: It's the costume of a boy who was viciously shot to death by a dumb-ass Hispanic who was racist! You of all people should get that!
RK: I do, you ignorant jackass! You just think you're hot!
WADE: And you think you are, with your crazed Cabbage Patch Crackhead get-up?
WOMAN: Whether it's 1983 or 2023, you'll never forget your first Cabbage Patch Crackhead.
BUSTER: Guys, let's just calm down….
WADE: That's another thing. We could've hit the jackpot house on 5th if it wasn't for your blistering toes!
BUSTER: It was a medical condition! And if Sparky hadn't told us to walk back to the apartment on 8th because of the defective wrapper, it could've been avoided!
SPARKY: At least I didn't want to dress up like a (bleep) mouse!
BUSTER: It's a rock-star rat, you son of a bitch! That's it! I'm going to call my boys and prove to you all that this debate is serious!
WADE: While you do your stupid, nonsensical Buster stuff, I'm getting my own candy!
RK: Me too!
SPARKY: You think I need you assholes! I'm going to take a bus to the other side of town, where the REAL candy action is!
(simultaneously) BUSTER, RK, AND WADE: See if I care!
(all four boys go their separate ways)
SPARKY: This is my (bleep) candy!
(Sparky actually scoops up the candy that fell and takes it with him)
BOOMING VOICE: And now, it's time for another Homage To Classic TV!
(Sparky sits in a chair wearing a sultan's robe near a fireplace, drinking C&C Cola out of a teacup)
SPARKY: I specifically requested C&C Ginger Ale! I'll send Bitterman quite the complaint. Hello, Earth. A lot of you are wondering why TV sucks now. Well, that's because the men in charge refuse to try anymore. Back then, it was easy to come up with a show that was witty, heartwarming, and even a little cynical. Now, it looks like a real cluster(bleep). You guys remember TGIF? I sure do. You see kids, they had something called "family sitcoms" back then. And ABC was loaded with them. Come to think of it, there was one sitcom that I enjoy watching on Nick at Nite these days. And my boys do as well. It just recently celebrated its 25th anniversary, and this is our tribute to it. Here's Full House. (long pause for ending statement) I, I, I really don't have anything else to say. I kind of thought, you know, RK would take care of that.
(shortened version of Full House opening sequence and theme song playing)
Because Full House was a live-action show, having our characters play their characters would look pathetic. So we created animated versions for each character. Jeff Franklin, the creator of the show, was brought in as supervisor. The following takes place in 1994, after Full House had reached its height in popularity.
"JESSE AND THE BOTTLE"
One day, Danny was cleaning the floor when he noticed something.
DANNY: Hmmm, mustard. (Danny licks mustard as audience is disgusted) I'll throw it up later so Joey can eat it. (laughter)
JESSE: Damn, I can't do…..ANYTHING right.
DANNY: You just figured that out? (laughter)
JESSE: Shut up, Mop and Glo. (laughter) Anyway, Fat Fish Records told me that I'm a failure and I'll never achieve anything in life.
DANNY: They were right indeed. (laughter)
JESSE: At least I don't waste my time cleaning all day like a punk-ass bitch.
DANNY: I was molested as a kid. So I cleaned repeatedly to take away the pain. Now do you want to mock sexual harassment again?
JESSE: Sorry, Danny.
DANNY: It's OK. I was never molested. My dad just licked me on my face real hard. (laughter)
D.J: Dad, Kimmy's coming over because she needs to study for tomorrow's quiz.
DANNY: 1. You disgust me. And 2, Kimmy's studying?!
D.J: It's not her choice. She just doesn't want to be the kind of girl that goes, "May I take your order, please?" (laughter)
DANNY: Even then, she'd still be a failure. (laughter)
We cut to Stephanie in her room.
JOEY: Hey, Steph. What's up?
STEPHANIE: I'm getting old, aren't I?
JOEY: No way. Where'd you get that?
STEPHANIE: Three years ago, I was the cutest kid in the house. Now, I look like Lisa Turtle on ecstasy.
JOEY: Hey, she goes to work! But there is something I want you to know, Steph.
STEPHANIE: What?
JOEY: I know you feel bad now, but tomorrow you'll feel much worse.
STEPHANIE: That doesn't make me feel better.
JOEY: Why do you think I said it? (laughter)
STEPHANIE: I'm going to the bathroom to look for gray hairs. (laughter)
(Jesse walks in)
JOEY: Hey Jesse. Want to get anal?
JESSE: Nah, I'm kind of tired from yesterday. (laughter) I wanted to know how you handle failure because of how much your life represents it.
JOEY: I'm not a failure! I'm Ranger Joe, bitch!
JESSE: That was 1991-1992, bitch! (laughter)
JOEY: (bleep) you all the way to Hell. Anyway, I don't know how I handle failure, I just repress it.
JESSE: How can you repress failure?
JOEY: With Budweiser.
JESSE: What?
JOEY: And Coors Light and Grey Goose and Colt .45 and Bacardi and Blue Moon and Heineken and Alize.
JESSE: Joey…you drink?
JOEY: Almost all the time.
JESSE: Joey, you know drinking's bad.
JOEY: I do it in moderation.
JESSE: Almost all the time isn't moderation.
JOEY: Well, it helps me a lot. That's why I'm so upbeat all the time. Whenever I'm racing with Michelle, we just get drunk. She wins, she taunts me in a very sexy way, and we have a sloppy make-out session.
JESSE: No wonder she had Boing-Boing on her breath this morning. (laughter) I don't know Joey, do you really think alcohol's the answer?
JOEY: Hey, it helps me. (offers Jesse a cold bottle of Coors Light from his back pocket refrigerating device) And it can help you.
(Jesse looks at the bottle with fear)
Within days, Jesse became a different person. He ignored the fact that Joey drinks in moderation and started abusing it. It all came to a head at dinner one night.
DANNY: I put new shelf paper in D.J's closet.
D.J: I hate my life. Aunt Becky, what'd you do today?
BECKY: Well, Nicky and Alex were playing with the cell phone today, and Alex put the phone on his belt buckle like it was an attachment. It was so cute!
(drunken) JESSE: God, can you shut up about those ugly kids? I nail a broad like you and they look like that?
BECKY: Excuse me?
JESSE: And Danny, get some ass. Shelf paper is the highlight for you? Man, your life is depressing. And Joey, STOP with those damn cartoon impressions! You molest kids, just admit it and move on with your pathetic life! D.J, you are such a waste of human skin. Stephanie, you stopped being entertaining after Season 5. Get over it! And Michelle, you're just an annoying little prick now. But there's something attractive about you. That's why I kissed you on the (bleep) mouth so many (bleep) times!
KIMMY: Hola, Tanneritos!
JESSE: Magilla Gorilla, go back to the wild! (laughter)
KIMMY: You're no prize yourself, Elvis freak. Ever heard of Public Enemy? (laughter)
JESSE: You all suck. I'm wasting my time in this house of jacks!
(Comet comes to play with Jesse)
JESSE: Get out of my (bleep) face, Comet. (laughter)
JOEY: Danny, Jesse needs help.
DANNY: I'll just watch him die a slow, painful death all on his own. (laughter)
BOOMING VOICE: And that was another Homage To Classic TV! Tune in next week to see more of your childhood favorites bowed down to!
SCENE 4
The Neighborhood
Seattle, Washington
Exterior Sidewalk
Testicular Sound Express has broken up to get candy solo. It seems pretty hard right now.
RK: Trick-or-treat.
LADY: Who are you? A homosexual rainbow troll?
RK: I'm James Holmes!
LADY: Why would you dress up like such a horrible person? If you had parents, I'd give them a stern talking to.
(The lady slams the door shut)
RK: Damn. Without the guys, my costume looks offensive by comparison.
("Scream" by Zac Efron playing in the background)
Buster, RK, and Wade are all having trouble getting candy. The majority of the time, they're turned away because their costumes are offensive. Especially Wade's. Buster at least got some pieces of candy. The guys all realized that as long as they're alone, no one will get the theme of their costumes and hate them. Also, Buster routinely called CEC Entertainment and Bowling for Soup.
SPARKY: Ah, the 60. Come to papa.
Sparky and his friends live on the north end of Seattle. The 60 bus goes to the south end, where more candy is handed out on Halloween. Sometimes, even money is given. That's why as the night passes, you traditionally see fewer kids on the north end. Last year, there was a 55% difference between candy on both ends.
("Rest In Peace" by Jim Johnston playing on a boombox, which they're allowing because it's Halloween)
SPARKY: This is awesome. When I get back home, I'll show ALL those assholes my candy.
Sparky's Jerry Sandusky costume is getting some dirty looks.
About five stops later, some idiots who are much older than Sparky board the bus. They're not drunk, but very rowdy.
JOSH: Dude, I got 2K13 last week.
BRIAN: Yeah, was it dope?
JOSH: Nah son, it was wack. Jay-Z trying to make a statement.
GRAHAM: Dude, that's (bleep) stupid. Brooklyn Nets are the (bleep) though.
JOSH: No lie son. They got Lopez, Johnson, Wallace, Williams, AND Humphries! Niggas gonna win the Atlantic!
GRAHAM: Not even, niggas gonna win the NBA Finals.
JOSH, BRIAN, AND GRAHAM: FINALS!
SCENE 5
The Jennings Household
Seattle, Washington
Interior Living Room
KG is still scared to go outside. In order to calm him down whenever it's necessary, RK recorded several episodes of Mike The Knight on their DVR.
SQUIRT: How are we going to get across, Mike?
MIKE: Hey, that's NOT your line!
SQUIRT: How are we going to get across, Mike The Awesome Knight of Awesome Awesomeness?
MIKE: We'll create a bridge out of gum and get across.
SQUIRT: But we have no gum.
MIKE: That's what you think. I carry Trident, Winterfresh, Juicy Fruit, 5 React, and Orbit in my pockets all the time. Like I always say…
(imitating Jake Beale) KG: Be a knight, do it right!
SQUIRT: But it might be dangerous.
MIKE: I don't care. I'm always equipped for anything that might hurt, maim, or slaughter me.
KG: Mike's right! I shouldn't let the news keep me from celebrating Halloween. But I SHOULD be prepared.
("Undead" by Hollywood Undead playing in the background)
(KG is putting tape all over the house to prevent bullets or bombs or grenades. He's also putting on a Charlie Scene-style mask. KG also puts up signs that say things like "Child Abuse Is WRONG" and "Molest The Molesters!")
KG: There. (takes off Charlie Scene mask and puts on Captain America mask) There's no way the Jennings house is unprotected. And I put a bulletproof layer on this costume. It's amazing how I only paid five dollars for this layer off the back of a comic book!
(KG runs out the house, but he immediately gets shot)
SCENE 6
The Jackpot Neighborhood
Seattle, Washington
Exterior Bus
Sparky gets out the bus. Everybody hated his costume.
(taking garbage off his face) SPARKY: Damn. So far, Halloween sucks worse than that Blue Man Group concert I went to.
(We cutaway to a scene where Sparky is backstage with the Blue Man Group. Judging by the backstage pass, he clearly won a contest of some sort. The Blue Man Group plays the role of characters who are fascinated by modern things like the iPhone or watches. And apparently, they are fascinated by Sparky because they keep squeezing his face.)
SPARKY: Will you (bleep) cut that out?
Sparky goes from door-to-door trying to get candy, and hardly succeeds. One person even threw a rock at him believing he was a Joe Paterno hater. Sparky takes the candy he got and boards the next bus home.
SCENE 7
The Neighborhood
Seattle, Washington
Exterior Sidewalk
All four boys meet up, desponded. Halloween has gone from good to crappy.
SPARKY: Hey.
BUSTER: Hey.
WADE: Hey.
(imitating a nervous Rico Suave) RK: Hey-o. My name is Rico, and this is Rico's. Do you like hot dogs? We've got hot dogs. Do you like….
(imitating Michael Yarmush) SPARKY: RK!
RK: Sorry. I was just thinking of Hannah Montana.
WADE: Guys, I'm sorry. I was really bitter and bitchy.
SPARKY: So was I. I dismissed you guys as if you didn't matter.
RK: I started it, Sparko. I was greedy and ruined everybody's time. I feel worse than people who don't get their Facebook PMs answered.
Buster Newman
RK Jennings: ur cute
Seen Tue 11:23 AM
FRENCH NARRATOR: Two minutes later….
RK's PM still hasn't been answered yet.
FRENCH NARRATOR: Twelve minutes later…..
Still nothing.
FRENCH NARRATOR #2: So much later that the old narrator got tired of waiting, and they had to hire a new one.
RK opens a box to reveal a .47-caliber handgun.
BUSTER: Slipping into darkness…
(RK fires two gunshots at Buster's head)
RK: You son of a bitch!
Back to reality.
BUSTER: You didn't ruin my night. I got a lot of candy, a nice crystal skull, and I got the Chuck E. Cheese's guys.
WADE: Buster, for the last time, no one cares about a stupid mascot change!
ROCK STAR CHUCK: That's what you think!
It's the new CEC mouse…in Seattle!
SPARKY: Rock Star Chuck? Jaret Reddick? What the (bleep)?
ROCK STAR CHUCK: That's right, kids. And Wade, people do care. Some believe that I fit with the times!
SKATER BOY CHUCK: And some believe that I'm so special and endearing, I should've never been replaced!
RK: Duncan Brannan?
SKATER BOY CHUCK: Yup. And I'm here to let you kids know that for the better part of 15 years, I brought the fun, and parents got the credit! Check out my Chuck Touch.
(with one Chuck Touch, Skater Boy Chuck has created an amazing stage)
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Really. Because I'm making this joint cool again! Everybody's going to want funner cheese!
SKATER BOY CHUCK: That's not even grammatically correct.
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Who cares what you think, you oversized mutant?
SKATER BOY CHUCK: You should, roadkill!
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Why don't we let these guys decide which is better. My guitar…..
SKATER BOY CHUCK: Or my melodious voice?
Soon, several kids have converged thanks to one of Rock Star Chuck's guitar riffs.
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Everybody say….
SKATER BOY CHUCK: It's my party!
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Everybody say…
SKATER BOY CHUCK: It's my party!
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Say…
SKATER BOY CHUCK: It's my party…at Chuck E. Cheese's, where a kid can be a kid!
(the two rodents mash their songs together to create "Say It's My Party")
Later on…..
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Where a kid can be a kid! Where a kid can be a…
SKATER BOY CHUCK: Cool kid!
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Where a kid can be a KID!
SKATER BOY CHUCK: It's my party!
BUSTER: Thanks, guys.
ROCK STAR CHUCK: No problem, Buster. Happy to help. Hey big guy, we could use a voice like that for our next ads! Wanna do it?
SKATER BOY CHUCK: It's OK, new Chuck. My time and place in the media is gone. The company is officially yours now.
ROCK STAR CHUCK: Really? That means a lot coming from you. Thanks. You can call me Rock Star Chuck.
SKATER BOY CHUCK: And you can call me Skater Boy Chuck.
(the two shake hands and hug)
SPARKY: You were right, Buster. People DO care. Look, this is trending worldwide on Twitter!
WADE: Will anyone really care about this?
RK: Probably not. I mean, our ratings are taking a beating anyway.
BUSTER: It could be worse. We could be that new show on Comedy Central about those park rangers.
SPARKY: Oh yeah! What's that called?
RK: Lost In Translation?
BUSTER: Nah, it's produced by Daniel Tosh.
SPARKY: Um, Falcon Crest?
BUSTER: That was on ABC.
SPARKY: CBS.
BUSTER: Oh.
RK: How about…
WADE: HOW ABOUT (BLEEP) BRICKLEBERRY?!
(long pause)
BUSTER: That's the one!
(Wade walks away in frustration)
RK: What's his problem?
SPARKY: Maybe the Run-DMC sneakers weren't in his size.
("Sandpaper" by Fozzy playing in the end credits)
©2012 ANDERSON PRODUCTIONS