Just started thinking about grief whilst brushing my teeth (as you do) and decided to write a oneshotabout how Draco might have felt after the Battle of Hogwarts.
*DISCLAIMER:
- No hate towards Draco!
- Anything you recognise isn't mine but JK Rowlings :)
Enjoy!
Sometimes you will never know the value of something until it becomes a memory.
Dr Seuss
Mother says it's a phase, that I grew into it, so I'll grow out of it and forget what happened. Father says I'm grieving; people I knew and loved are now dead, and I'm just trying to accept that they're gone. Astoria says it's my subconscious forgiveness:I'm
reliving these horrorsbecause I can't forgive myself until I truly know what happened. I disagree - I think it's guilt, etched into my very being,like the wrinkles creasing my blood - covered hands...
To think I just sat back and let it allhappen! I had the power to stop this, but instead I watched people be tormented, tortured and terminated like a mildly interesting show. Indifferently, I gave no thought about these people or the affects of
their absences; I forgot they loved and were loved, and hadfamilies and jobs and memories and lives of their own. And know it's all gone. And it's all because of me.
Despite all this, I'm still the 'Player', the 'Bad Boy', the one girls swoon over. Isn't it funny how shallow human beings are? People still add'(y/n)' to my last name, and still dream of the 'undeniable' chemistry between us. I think they're
all deranged. Behind the fathomless eyes and introverted, brooding exterior they love so much, I am a murderer - how could anyone love me? How could anyone want to love me?
To think I wanted all this as a child: the indisputable fame, the escalating rumours, the adoring fan club and everything else I now hate. I wanted to be known for my achievements, but not the ones I am know renowned for. Truthbe told, I wantedto
be Potter; wonderful Potter,with his scarand his broomstick...
But what does it matter now? My wish was granted, I just didn't know the price I would have to pay for it...