Why Him?
By MissWiseNWitty
Twilight Bella/Jacob Drama & Poetry
Author note: I tend to have problem with the flow of whatever I'm writing so if there's something that doesn't exactly blend well please let me know. Special thanks to my my first reviewer and follower and favorite iniquityfic for pointing this fact out. Her story's are amazing please go check those out. Her Leah and OC story are one of the best on fan fiction.
For now I may just write short story's. I will probably do long stories eventually but until then I'll work on my flow while gradually increasing the length of my stories. Not all stories will be increased with every new story though if I see something is really comfortable at a certain length I may leave it.
My first attempt at poetry. Not every sentence will rhyme I'm that good (yet). Hope you enjoy it
Jacob thoughts in poem form when he realizes Bella screwed and used him, because that's pretty much what she did. In this fan-fiction he's really angry ,sad ,and rejected but forgiving.
My fan-fictions tend to be more of the dramatic type so if you don't like it there's not much I can do for you that's just my writing style.
Sorry for the long wait I haven't had much time to write but I'm back now though
You chose him
over your best friend
a simple life
for a world with money in sight
decided to be
a dead vampire
instead of a living human being
What's so good about immortality
is it the fact you can do everything
have so many careers
for so many years
make an image for yourself
and then change and be someone else
you could've chose me
we could've been happy
I don't know why I keep torturing myself
trying to take you from someone else
it's obvious that your love for him
is your highest priority over everything
maybe I should give up
find someone else
someone that can love me for me
and not for someone I couldn't be
I miss how it used to be
when it was me and you bells
playing in a world so innocent
when the hardest thing that happened
was when I couldn't convince you
to do something
you were always so stubborn
when you made your mind up
it was like trying to get someone to stop singing
rain rain go away
come back another day
because whether or not that was sang
it would rain anyway
that how my world felt
like rain was pouring down
and no rain songs could make it stop
The pack says I should stop
that I'm torturing myself
and that you not going to help
you were my umbrella
you were the one that shielded me
when I couldn't take the rain anymore
until I could shine again
you said I said I was your sun
have you begun to prefer the cold
do you prefer his cold arms
over my warm and comforting love
I wanna shut down
stop feeling anything
like you did when your Edward disappeared
I would never leave you
nor would have deceived you
I just wanted your love
but I guess I was asking for too much
what does he have that I don't
riches and fancy boats
I may not have been rich
but I was not poor
and my love for you
could buy a store
and the oceans combined
with everything else in sight
ugh why couldn't it be me
why couldn't I be
the only thing you see
we have so much history
and I thought we were meant to be
but I guess everything isn't as it seems
you promised me we were forever
but I guess your forever
after a few century's
won't include me
after I'm long gone
you'll be somewhere along
the next generation of lives
maybe missing my sunlight
but probably enjoying the cold
wrapped in the arms of another
wrapped in the arms of your lover
I just want it to stop
is it all my fault
did I lose my chance
did it slip through my hands
it's probably prancing around
screaming no way no how
oh what a Jockster it is
giving me a chance
then demolishing it
you telling me there's a chance
then running back to his cold hands
telling me maybe we can be
and then leaving me all alone
because you were what I considered home
I think you're using me
and enjoy my misery
well as far as I can see
I mean why else would you tell me
you wanna spend time
when seeing you hurts me inside
I wish you could make up your mind
and if it's isn't me then leave me behind
I think ill be fine with just a little time
I'll probably cry
but pretend I'm alright
because that's what I always do
when I see him and you
cuddled up
like the the old lady in a shoe
you don't care about me
you just care about you
stringing me along
playing with my heart
tugging and pulling
without a doubt
of what I'm doing
when did you become so mean
what happened to me and you
we were everything
everything against anything
standing in our way
to be together
standing in our way
to be forever
but I guess every empire must fall
even those who have been together
through it all
you keep on pulling me back
you're giving me a heart attack
not physically but mentally
your hurting me without raising a pinky
too bad you'll never see
what you mean to me
if he were to leave
you still have me
I promise that you
would never be lonely
oh here we go again
what is it this time
you stumbled and fell
tripped another time
I'm surprised you haven't
fell down a well
you would think those injuries
would get to head
that maybe a life without vampires
is better instead
but no you always take him back
without consideration
what about considering
if he loves me
then why he's always leaving
and then coming back
begging me
please let us start again
why do you always take him back
have little respect for yourself like that
wake up and face the facts
one day he may not come back
I think you're doing what he does to you to me
leaving me for him and coming back
oh Jacob I'm sorry
don't you love me
love holds forgiveness
until you take it
you taken it so many times
it means nothing now
militated it
until it meant nothing
but lies of false loving
what happens when you get tired of immortality
because that's what every vampire does eventually
you've seen so many things
any you're ready to leave
but you can't control anything
especially when you perish
unworldly beauty with a dark curse
I've always wondered why vampires
don't have a heartbeat
I think it's because when they change
everything about their life is replaced
selfish that's what you are
to those who had the liberty
of knowing your once gentle heart
what about your dad who will never know
what happened to his baby girl and
where did she go
oh wait I just realized something
you just like Rebucca
stayed for a little while
then took off forever
got married to some random guy
and never came back
no matter how many times
dad and i tried to gain contact
him being a vampire makes no difference
you're still going away to fulfill your own wishes
but what about what about
the rest of us
the rest of us that got left behind
for your love
I can't believe I got an invitation
that forced to me to go out of obligation
I just want to be alone can't you see
to wallow in grief
but best friends are always at their friend wedding
I wondered what would happen
if I stood up and objected
would everyone look at me like I'm naked
or would anyone stand and help me
support the cause that you can't see
probably not
after all no one can see my thoughts
Except Edward
which is really creepy and invading privacy
Hey Bella guess what
I imprinted on you can u tell
nope you don't notice a thing
probably didn't even miss me
I still remembered the day I imprinted on you
What was a memorable day
is now covered in pain
and a hint of shame
guess what else
no wolf has ever been denied
by their imprint
well I guess I'm the first
and it really hurts
I always thought the pack was lieing
when they described the pain
of being separated from their imprint
but they weren't joking
it's physically and mentally chocking
but that's nothing compared to the fact
that you can't go back
to the one that's supposed
kiss you goodnight
and hold you tight
because she doesn't want to be in your bed
she's happy somewhere else
I'll never be to love someone else
but that's okay
but I wouldn't want to anyway
I wish I could erase the agony
of the those words whispered softly
''we can't ever be the way to want to be
and I'll never love you
that way you see
but you'll be my best friend for entirety''
but you don't wanted a best friend
you needed a lover
so that what me and my wolf
fought to be
but we lost sadly
with the price
of unbearable agony
My wolf screamed at me
don't let mate leave please
but am I supposed to do
you already chosen to leave me too
The only thing worser than the agony
was not feeling you at all
empty and gone
not there at all
all the images I saw
the day I imprinted
love , kids , being wed
ended when you were dead
although I was rejected
we used to be connected
you know how it goes when a imprint dies
their wolf will always follow
I was dieing slowly
but happily because the pain would be removed
and this would be like dream
maybe a nightmare fitted correctly
before I could die
I saw you again
and the image I saw
made me wish I could die
gone was the warmth you once had
and here was the coldness
that swallowed your body
gone was your blush
gone was your clumisness
gone were the things
that me love you deeply
and completely
The person in front of me
I didn't recognize
The person in front of me
I couldn't identify
it took away the only person
I really ever loved
and turned her into the person
I rid this world of
All this for love
Was it really worth that much
If it was the family
The pack was one unique bunch
and each of us could've given love
Are you happy now
you're a vampire too
while the rest of us
will be constantly missing you
But no matter what happens
you'll still my everything
which is both a cruse and a blessing
I feel like I've done everything
I could to win over you love
and it still wasn't enough
but that's okay
because soon I won't feel anything
why him
he was controlling and mean
and constantly made you bleed
both physically and mentally
but even though you choose him
you'll always have me
just look towards the sun when your bleeding
Sorry for the confusing begging it ended up matching in around the middle thanks for the commitment to read that far.
Okay really really really sorry for the long wait I'm really not used to writing anything long so the longer something is the more I struggle which is why sometimes the flow or timing is off but I promise you guys I'm really trying to work on it and I will. Please be easy on me since I'm just starting off I will take long breaks but I'm not dead LOL.