Cover art photograph by Alex E. Proimos ( photos/proimos/), used under CC BY-NC 2.0. Fade added.
I do not own The Hunger Games.
For Bay.
COLD HANDS, WARM HEART
Katniss Everdeen couldn't stop her leg from bouncing in irritation: her doctor was running late. She had purposely scheduled her appointment first thing in the morning so she could come in street clothes, rather than her Carhartt's jumpsuit. She had every intention of ducking into the nearest women's room and changing her clothes once her exam was over so she could get to her first client visit. Sure, that wasn't scheduled until later in the day, but Katniss worked hard to make sure her electrical and plumbing business was based on respect for her clients. They counted on her for service and she counted on them for referrals and she didn't want to blow it by running the risk of being late.
She tasted blood as she pulled at a cuticle with her teeth.
"Katniss Everdeen?" A clipped voice spoke from the open doorway. "The doctor will see you now."
"It's about time," Katniss muttered under her breath. She gathered up her magazine and her bag and followed the nurse through the door.
-o—
"Tsk. Your blood pressure is higher than your last doctor's visit, according to your chart." As the nurse recorded Katniss's vitals, the shirt she wore underneath her scrub top rode up on her wrist, exposing a forearm that was almost completely covered in tattoos.
Katniss shrugged as she rolled down the sleeve of her shirt. "I've been waiting a while. Nurse Trinkett, is it? That's really nice ink. Did you have that done locally?" She motioned to the woman's colorful arm.
Nurse Trinkett blushed slightly. "Thank you. I generally cover them at work. These are from a place down on First Street – Designs by Odair. Have you heard of it?"
Katniss shook her head. "No, but I've been thinking of getting another piece done."
Effie took one last look at the tray of instruments needed for Katniss's exam, then turned to the younger woman. "Then you must see him! He does lovely work. I just love pretty things, don't you? And what better way to feel beautiful than to have one's own body be beautiful artwork? He's a dear! And oh, so handsome. Tell him that Effie Trinkett sent you, will you? Speaking of handsome, let me go tell the doctor that you are all set for him. Go ahead and change into this paper gown with the opening in the front, and leave your socks on. These floors get so cold and we wouldn't want you shivering before your exam is through."
The nurse left with a flutter of her hand, leaving Katniss to wonder exactly what she meant by that last statement as she took off her jeans and long sleeved t-shirt and donned the horrible paper gown. At least her favorite socks – fleece with little bunnies on them – peeked back at her when she hopped up on the table to wait.
The door opened almost immediately. Katniss supposed the man that entered was the doctor, even though he wore no lab coat. His blonde hair curled slightly over his ears, and his light blue dress shirt fit him very, very well. Well enough that Katniss might have ogled the fit and cut from his shoulders to his waist if she wasn't fighting a fit of anxiety. He was definitely more attractive than her last doctor.
Johanna is going to be so upset that she passed this one over.
He studied her chart. "Katniss, is it? Unusual name." His eyes, hidden behind brown-rimmed spectacles, glanced toward her.
"Thanks. Uh, family name."
He put the chart down with a click and walked to the sink to scrub his hands. "Okay, anything I should know? Any changes since your last exam?"
Katniss shook her head. "No. Everything's been normal."
"Concerns about sexual activity? Dryness? Orgasms? Any questions there?" He dried his hands and sat down on the rolling stool.
Katniss could feel her blush, even though she was an adult. She wanted to roll her eyes at her own reaction. So what if he was handsome? He was her doctor! How was she going to tell him that her last sexual activity involved something with a power cord? "No. Uh, no changes and no concerns. I guess you could say that I'm in a dry spell." She winced at how that sounded.
"Ah." He readied the stirrups and pulled on gloves. "Okay, let's have you lean back and scoot to the very end of the table with your feet in the stirrups. I'll drape you with another paper cloth." He watched quietly while Katniss gathered her long, straight hair and pulled it to the side before following his instructions.
Katniss had to breathe deeply to relax. She hated pelvic exams, but her mother and sister were both nurses who emphasized the need for regular screenings. Silently, she cursed them as she willed each muscle group into submission.
"Just some light touching around the outside before you feel more pressure. Are you okay? You're breathing pretty deeply…"
Her eyes met his over the drape; he had removed his glasses and his were very, very blue. So blue that they reminded her of something. What was it? "I'm okay. Just…keep going."
"I'm going to start the internal exam now. You're going to feel a little pressure…"
She nodded, cursing his kind bedside manner. If there was one thing she neither needed nor wanted, it was a play-by-play of what he was doing. She tried not to concentrate on what she knew was coming and instead thought of how familiar his eyes seemed. Her brow furrowed. "You know, I don't think I caught your name, Doctor."
He continued his movements. "You're doing great. Just a little palpating and then we're done. I thought that Effie had given you my name since I'm new to the practice. I'm Doctor Mellark. Doctor Peeta Mellark."
Katniss thought she saw spots. At bare minimum, she was sure all of the air had been sucked out of the room and she was blushing to…well…all the way down to where he was sitting. How could Peeta Mellark – presumably the same Peeta Mellark she grew up with, from the small town she'd left over ten years ago – be the doctor who was currently groping her?
It's not groping, Katniss. It's palpating.
Finally, his patient voice intruded on her scattered thoughts. "Katniss? Katniss, you need to relax so I can move my hand."
Katniss blushed and practiced deep breathing in sort of a reverse-Kegel. She forced herself to think of things that normally relaxed her: bubble baths, NHL hockey, Yankees/Mets games where the Yankees won, and puppies.
Finally, he withdrew and peeled off his gloves, then made a few notes in her chart before turning back to her with a sincere look. "I apologize. If I thought for a second that you hadn't recognized me, I would have mentioned it. I assumed that you were fine with it, though, when you didn't say anything. Would you like to reschedule with another doctor?"
"No!" Katniss closed her eyes briefly. She was already here. Psyching herself up and rearranging her jobs had taken her a month of planning. "Let's just…. You've already pretty much seen everything there is, right? So let's just keep going."
"Are you sure?" His blue eyes seemed so very concerned – just like they used to be when they would look at her during class.
Katniss lay flat. "I'm sure."
She heard Peeta – his name is Doctor Mellark – sigh while he put on new gloves. "Okay. You're going to feel the speculum. The plastic ones pinch a little sometimes when they expand and I apologize for that. We like them better than the metal ones, though, because they are clear and have a small light—"
Katniss winced as she heard the clicking noise of the device opening. "Peet—Doctor Mellark? Do you suppose you could stop telling me every little thing? It freaks me out."
"Sorry." There were a few seconds of blessed silence before he asked, "So, uh…how've you been?"
Katniss wanted to laugh at his sheepish apology, but she was too busy concentrating on ignoring what was going on below the drape. "Well. I'm doing well. How about you?"
"Busy. I just moved here and signed on to this practice - I'm trying to make a fresh start after my divorce. I bought a new house that needs a ton of work. Other than that, I guess I can't complain." He gave a self-deprecating laugh.
Katniss heard instruments moving around and the clicking sound of the speculum closing. She breathed a sigh of relief that the exam was over. "You're divorced? I hadn't heard you got married."
She felt rather than saw his shrug. "Delly and I got married just a couple of years ago. You wouldn't have heard about it, since it was so long after you and Gale left town. How is he, by the way?"
Katniss didn't know what shocked her more: that Peeta Mellark, who had never really been a friend in any sense of the word, knew that she and Gale had been together, or that she didn't feel any pain when he mentioned her ex-husband's name. "We're divorced, but I hear he's doing well."
"I'm sorry to hear that." Peeta came to her side and she raised her eyebrow. He had the grace to blush. "We're not done yet - we have the breast exam. Put your left arm above your head, please?"
Katniss nodded, her face going up in flames as Peeta separated the sides of her paper gown. His cold hands startled her and a nervous giggle escaped.
"Cold hands?" At her nod, he moved to the side and rubbed them together briskly. "Here. This should help."
Katniss tried to look anywhere but at his clear, blue eyes when he slipped his now-warm hands inside her gown. Peeta Mellark, former captain of the wrestling team, member of the debate, chess and cross country running teams, was feeling her up. Instead, she focused on his words. "You said you have a house that needs work?"
Peeta was quiet for a moment while he pressed his hand along her flesh. "Yeah. It's on the south side of town. I think I had this crazy idea that it would help me take my mind off things. It needs rewiring – there's still glass fuses – and some of the plumbing needs to be updated. I just had the chimneys checked out so at least I know I won't burn the house down if I light a fire."
She frowned and thought for a second while she switched arms. "I could help you with some of that." At his surprised look, she said defensively, "I'm an electrician and a plumber."
"Both? How'd that happen?" He moved the paper aside to check for symmetry. Katniss averted her eyes, well aware that he was the first man to see her naked since Gale.
"I worked on a job that threw some sparks and the guy I apprenticed under told me that I should learn to put out the fires I started. Plumbing seemed like a logical choice. Anyway, I could come by and check it out. You know, since you checked out my pipes, I could check out yours."
Peeta blinked hard at her statement and Katniss tried not to groan at her horrible attempt at flippancy. Or was it flirtation?
She completely forgot to feel awkward when his blue eyes lit up in a smile. "That would be amazing. Really. I'm in way over my head in terms of the work."
"No problem. I'll give you my card."
Peeta pulled the edges of her paper gown together and patted her arm gently. "We're done, so you can go ahead and get dressed. I look forward to the day you check out my pipes, Miss Everdeen."
-o—
"Keep your voice down, Jo!" Katniss glanced sideways at the other diners who were looking toward their table as another bark of laughter rang out from the dark-haired, petite woman sitting across from her. Katniss had just finished recounting her experience to her best friend, Johanna Mason.
"Oh my God, Brainless, that is priceless. Did he say anything about your socks? I bet you wore the cows. No! No! The bunnies. You wore the bunnies didn't you? Did he notice your tattoo? Did he tell you to lay off the Kegels?" Johanna let out another peal of laughter even as she wiped her eyes with the cloth napkin.
"Please, Jo? I don't want to be kicked out of another restaurant," Katniss pleaded with her friend. Johanna Mason might look like Audrey Hepburn but she was as loud and unpredictable as a Robin Williams hyped up on cocaine.
Jo finished wiping her eyes again, then grabbed a bread stick. She took a bite after dunking it unceremoniously in the balsamic, olive oil, and herb mix the restaurant was known for. "They won't kick me out: my pharmaceutical expense account brings a lot of business here. So, he was good?"
Katniss frowned, lost in thought. "Yeah. He was totally professional. It seems like he really cares about his patients."
"I think I hear you saying that I should check out his great bedside manner? If you get my drift?" Johanna wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
Katniss's frown deepened. "Jesus, Jo, show some professionalism. Do you have to sleep with every doctor on your route? Besides, he's coming off of a divorce."
"I wish I had met him at Lonely Hearts and Hard Ons." Jo said wistfully. She and Katniss had met at a divorce support group: Katniss was there to work through Gale's betrayal of her for a newer, curvier model; Johanna was there for what she called ripe pickings. According to her, recently divorced guys were great in bed. "I could have helped him through it. Besides, I don't sleep with every doctor. We drug reps have a saying we live by. Want to hear it?"
"No."
Johanna ignored her. "Docs before cocks."
"What does that even mean?"
"That it's important to keep one or two doctors back – so we can actually go to the doctor when we get sick. You know, if they can prick you, they shouldn't prick you. And since I'm in need of a well-woman exam..."
Katniss gaped. "You're going to go to him for a pelvic exam?"
"Why not? You did." Johanna's shrewd brown eyes met Katniss's gray ones. "Exactly why does the thought of him probing my privates bother you? It's his job. Come on, Katniss: so you met this guy that you used to know. Why not share the love?"
Katniss kept her eyes trained on her water glass, ignoring the frank stare of the other woman.
"Holy Shit! You like him!" Jo dropped her voice as a few diners looked their way. "You like him. And you don't want him checking my oil because of it. That's why you made the flirty little comment about checking out his pipes!"
"It's just a job." Katniss stubbornly refused to acknowledge the blush staining her cheeks at the thought of Peeta's phone call to confirm her availability for later in the week.
"Mmmmhmmmm. I say that all the time. Usually after I've left a pair of my panties at a doctor's office."
"Why do I keep you around again?" Katniss glared.
Johanna looked at her and shook her head at the braid, and the conservative black slacks and black sweater Katniss wore. "Without me you'd still be grieving your douchebag of an ex-husband, that's why. It's bad enough that the only color in your wardrobe is black. You'd have zero excitement in your life if it wasn't for me."
Katniss had to hand it to her friend: she was never bored around Johanna Mason.
-o—
"Doc, would you mind helping me with this? It sticks a little." Johanna Mason motioned to the zipper on her black dress.
Peeta looked around, confused. "Usually, Effie has patients undressed and gowned by the time she calls me into the room."
She cast him a coy look over her shoulder "I'm not a normal patient."
When she wiggled in front of him, he reached out and reluctantly unzipped her dress. "I'll just give you a moment—"
"What for? It's nothing you haven't seen before, eh Doc?" Stepping out of her dress, Johanna made short work of her black lace bra and thong and hopped up on the exam table, naked except for her pearl earrings and necklace. "Shall we get started?"
Peeta gaped at her for a moment. "Uh, sure. Why don't you lay back and scoot down to the edge?" He washed his hands and gloved up. When she was draped and ready, he began the exam. "You're going to feel some light touching on the outside—"
"Doc, it's okay to get right to it. There's no need for foreplay."
Peeta was silent for a moment. "Ms. Mason, I understand you're a drug rep? Then you should know that this is not foreplay. This is the external part of your examination."
"Whatever you say, Doc," was the cocky reply.
He rolled his eyes at her draped knees. "Okay, now you're going to feel some pressure –"
"Why do you guys always say that? It's not like I haven't felt bigger thing than your fingers. I mean, my vibrator is bigger than this."
He ignored her comment and concentrated silently on her exam before withdrawing his fingers. "Next I'm going to use the speculum. You'll hear a clicking noise—"
"Yeah, yeah. I get that you like the plastic ones because it's easier to see when you pop the hood. I've never met a doctor who didn't. Katniss was right: you really do like to talk a lot during these things. Do you talk during sex, too?" At Peeta's silence, Jo let out a laugh. "It's alright, Doc, you passed the test. Most of the doctors I know who are dogs – cheating on their wives or girlfriends with any willing drug rep who flirts during office visits – would have already copped a feel. Hell, there was one that told me I needed orgasm therapy and had sex with me on the exam table."
"This is a test?" Peeta put his instruments away and came around the table. "Breast exam is up next."
"You know, I'll buy you dinner if you do a rectal exam." She winked at his look of shock. Moving one hand over her head, she gauged his reaction to her next statement. "The test was because I can't approve of you boning my best friend if you turn out to be a horny pig. Also, I wanted to see if Katniss was right about how good your hands are."
"You're friends with another patient?" Peeta examined first one breast, then the other while avoiding direct eye contact.
Jo snorted. "Of course. I put her down as a referral: Katniss Everdeen?" She watched his eyes for a spark of recognition. When she saw it, she gave a laugh and sat up to swivel her legs over the side of table. "I see she left a lasting impression. Good. Because right now you're the leading contender to pop her divorce-cherry."
Peeta shook his head as he finished making notes in her chart and handed her some personal wipes. "I can't discuss other patients. And I certainly won't comment on their personal lives."
She swabbed the extra lubrication off her private area and began dressing. "Oh, come on, Doc. Don't deny it. You guys knew each other growing up, so you know how hard it is for her to trust someone and open up to them. I'm here to tell you: if don't want to be her next horizontal mambo partner, you should back off now. But if you are interested in putting those phenomenal hands to good use, you could be good for her. Just don't screw it up. If you hurt her, I will be back here on not-so-friendly terms."
Jo slipped on her Jimmy Choo Bahama pumps on and smoothed the lines of her sleek black dress. Rooting in her small leather purse for a business card, she continued, "Oh, and or the love of God, don't take it slow. Nothing's worse than a guy who looks like you do who thinks that a woman doesn't want to get sweaty and scream your name before date five." She walked forward and shook his hand, "Well, thanks again. That was the most fun I've had for a twenty-five dollar co-pay in a long time. Let's do it again sometime."
-o—
"Doctor Mellark, I think I can give you a quote on the work. You've really taken on a lot." That was an understatement: the house looked like someone had recently burgled it: the wall between the small kitchen and dining room was partially demolished, the downstairs bathroom had a working toilet but no sink, and the upstairs bathroom was totally gutted. It appeared that only the master bedroom and bathroom and the living room were habitable.
"Call me Peeta. Please." He shot her a wide smile. "I told you that I bit off more than I could chew. I guess I thought I could do the work myself, since I have good hands. It got away from me pretty quick, though."
Katniss raised an eyebrow. At his comment about his hands, she couldn't help but notice them again and recall their strength and gentleness during her exam. It made her shiver to think of what they might be like in a less clinical setting. Dragging her eyes to his face, she was reminded that his eyes were bluer without the glasses, more like the eyes of the boy she remembered. The whole conversation and its subtext made her nervous enough that she rubbed her suddenly-sweaty palms on her jeans.
"Peeta, is there somewhere we can sit and talk through what you have in mind for each of the rooms? I might have some people I can recommend for some of the other work."
"Sure. Let me…God, I'm such a bad host. I'm not used to having people over. Can I get you anything? Coffee? Tea? Water?"
"No, thank you." She studied him for a moment, taking in his obvious discomfort. "You're not a bad host because I'm not a guest: I'm a vendor. Are you like this with all the service people you bring in?"
He grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Probably. I think it comes from working in a bakery. I'm all about service."
Katniss let out an unexpected laugh, ignoring the innuendo. "That's right! Your parents owned the bakery over on Main Street!"
"Yeah. My brothers and I all worked there growing up. Mom and Dad are still there." Peeta considered her thoughtfully. "You never came in, though. I'm surprised you remembered."
She hadn't thought about Mellark's Bakery since she'd left her small hometown with Gale. She remembered the beautiful cakes and pastries in the front window and felt a sudden pang as she remembered all the times Prim had begged to go inside. Katniss had had to shut her younger sister's begging down every time, telling her that they didn't have the money for such treats. They never had the money, not for birthdays, or even for Christmas. They would compromise by staring at the bakery windows for as long as Prim liked, then trudging home to a barren cupboard that was a far cry from the glistening and gorgeous treats in the window.
She had sent Prim a card with ten dollars tucked inside when she received her first real paycheck, telling her to use it at Mellark's.
His brilliant blue eyes caught and held hers. Time seemed to slow as neither could look away. Finally, the ringing of the doorbell broke the spell.
"Shit. Let me…let me grab that."
Katniss surveyed the kitchen while Peeta joked with a woman. The wall Peeta was trying to take down would open the room, combining it with the dining room and making one large space. The house had a strange little hearth there and Katniss idly wondered what he would do with it as she tried not to eavesdrop.
"Katniss Everdeen?" A vivacious and voluptuous blonde barreled into the kitchen and interrupted her thoughts. "Peeta, you didn't tell me that Katniss was here!"
Peeta shoved his hands in the pockets of his khakis. "I didn't get a chance."
A wide smile split the woman's face. "This is excellent! I am so glad you found each other! You must come with Peeta to dinner at our place. Bee will be so excited to hear how you two got together!" She clapped, jiggling her generous assets.
Katniss looked from the flush on Peeta's face to the grin on Delly's, trying to get her bearings. Peeta still talked to his ex-wife? She couldn't imagine letting Gale set foot inside her condo, let alone having a civil conversation with him. Obviously Delly thought Katniss was paying Peeta a social visit, which was odd. What was odder was that Katniss didn't mind the misunderstanding. She thought again of Gale and what she would want him to believe if he ever bumped into her with Peeta.
Peeta rubbed his hand across his hair, tousling it. "Dell, Katniss is just here…"
"I'd love to come. Peeta, is that okay?" Katniss walked to Peeta and laid her hand on his arm. Looking up at him through her long eyelashes, she did her best impression of a heated glance. Really, it wasn't that difficult given how attractive he was. She knew it had the intended effect when his muscles stiffened under her fingertips.
She wasn't sure if the trembling in his voice was laughter or something else when he and Delly worked out the details.
-o-
Dinner was not what she expected. First, Peeta had looked drop-dead gorgeous in dark dress pants and a blue dress shirt with matching tie that made his eyes deep and mysterious and his hair look like spun gold. He had looked just as stunned when she arrived at his place in a little black dress and heels, just enough makeup to highlight her eyes and lips, and flashing just enough cleavage so that Delly got the message she and Peeta were more than friends.
Even if that wasn't true.
Delly had answered the door of her townhome and kissed Peeta on the lips, which just made Katniss more uncomfortable. That was only exacerbated when, after taking the bottle of wine Peeta offered, Delly had turned and introduced Katniss to her girlfriend, Bee.
"Katniss, you remember Bristel from school? We call her Bee now." Delly held out her hand to Bristel – Bee – who took it and kissed the blonde woman's fingers gently. The look of love that passed between the two women was almost palpable.
Katniss felt a lump in her chest at the obvious affection between the two. She bit her lip and allowed Peeta's hand on the middle of her back to guide her further into the room.
During a lull in the pre-dinner conversation, when Bee went to refill their wine glasses and Delly hopped up from the couch to check on dinner, Peeta leaned over to Katniss and whispered, "Thanks for not freaking out."
"You mean over the fact that your ex-wife is a lesbian? And that we all went to school together?"
Peeta winced. "Yeah. The whole story is, uh, pretty complicated."
"Dinner's ready! Come on you two lovebirds!" Delly chirped from the doorway.
Katniss raised an eyebrow at Peeta. No matter how adorable he looked, or how sexy she found his forearms, she pinned him with a look that said the conversation was not over.
Delly ushered them into a brightly decorated dining area. Painted in shades of red and orange, the room was coordinated to match a large, modern painting that graced the space.
"That's quite a painting." Katniss gestured as Peeta tucked her chair under her.
"You like it? Peeta painted it." Delly laughed at Katniss's incredulous look. "He hasn't told you he paints? He's really talented. He used to do the cakes at the bakery."
"It hasn't come up." Peeta smoothed a napkin over his lap.
"I keep asking him to design a tattoo for me, but he won't. Katniss, do you have any tattoos?"
Peeta answered, "She has a floral piece. It's really lovely."
Katniss blushed, thinking of how Peeta knew about the tattoo which traced from the side of her left breast down to her hip bone. "Thanks. I got it on my honeymoon. My ex and I were supposed to both get them."
"Supposed to?" Bee asked.
"Gale took one look at the needle and chickened out."
Bee made a face of commiseration. "I know the feeling. I can't believe people who say it doesn't hurt."
"Mine didn't." Peeta chimed in.
Katniss looked at him in surprise. "You have a tattoo?"
Delly laughed and pointed to his bicep. "Tribal arm band. And you were tipsy, so that doesn't count."
Peeta joined in the laughter. "It was definitely one of my crazier things."
Katniss's heart clenched at the easy camaraderie between Delly and Peeta. She thought of the last time she and Gale had talked: the yelling and the recriminations were not things she was proud of. Her voice was soft and wistful when she said, "I guess we all do stupid things when we're young."
Bee finished serving the chicken marsala and pasta in silence. Finally, she looked from Peeta to Katniss. "Has he confessed yet?"
"Bristel, drop it." Peeta's jaw clenched.
Katniss slid her hand to cover where his clenched the napkin in his lap. His hand was like ice. "Confessed what?" she asked.
Bee winked at Delly. Sliding a glance toward Peeta, she leaned toward Katniss conspiratorially. "That he had a huge crush on you all through high school, of course."
Delly chimed in, her laughter good-natured and loud in the small room. "Oh, Bee, it was longer than that: he liked Katniss from the time we were all in elementary school. I'm surprised he decided to take a chance and marry me."
"And look at how that worked out," Peeta grumbled.
Delly chided, "Oh, stop. You know we were never meant to be anything but friends. I think you recognized that I was into girls before I did."
Bee looked over at her girlfriend. Blowing Delly a kiss, she said, "Well, it is his job to notice those things."
"Can we not talk about this?" Peeta demanded.
"Oh, Bee, we've upset him." Delly turned to Katniss. "What do you think of our Peeta?"
Katniss disentangled her fingers from where Peeta had them crushed in his and ran her hand over his thigh. She studied him, noting again how attractive he was. It was more than just his looks, though. She remembered how he had warmed his hands for her when she'd asked and how he had listened to her during her exam. He was caring and considerate and warm and funny – everything that had been missing from her life for the past year.
So she leaned into where he sat next to her and met his blue eyes. "I think he's full of surprises."
-o—
"Bee seems nice. She and Delly have a strong relationship." One couldn't be around the couple long without laughing. It was easy to see how the two women, one blonde, one dark-haired, had gravitated toward one another. They completed each other. "How'd they end up together?"
Katniss stood in Peeta's kitchen staring at the way his shirt shifted across his shoulders as he made tea. They had left Delly's before dessert, claiming that Katniss had an early job in the morning. By unspoken agreement, she had followed him into the house so she could get some answers.
"We all knew each other growing up. I guess some of us changed as we grew up and left home." Peeta fussed with the sugar bowl until Katniss couldn't stand it anymore.
"Not everyone." Katniss watched him until he looked up at her. A faint flush stained his cheeks. "Now stop fiddling with that and tell me what Delly's deal was at dinner."
Peeta handed her a mug. Wrapping his hands around his own, he stared out the window behind Katniss. "Delly was just looking out for me."
"By embarrassing you?"
He laughed, but it was a dry, discordant sound. "Yeah. She doesn't see it like that, but yeah."
Katniss shook her head. "I don't get it." Delly hadn't seemed malicious, but there had to be a reason for her to bring up the things they had talked about during dinner. There was such a thing as being too open and telling her about Peeta's supposed crush crossed the line.
He sipped at his tea and leaned back against the counter. "May I ask about your divorce? What happened with Gale?"
It was Katniss's turn to stare out a window. "I don't know. We were happy for about a half second. Money was tight, but we were both used to that. Gale just…he changed. Or maybe he was never the guy I thought he was. Maybe I was too focused on getting out of that town to really see him, you know? We got here and we both started working and all the pieces that clicked before just shifted. Anyway, he ended up leaving me for what my friend Jo calls a Kardashian look-alike." She shrugged. "Someone who has more to offer him."
"Oh, I doubt that." Peeta's words were so quiet that Katniss almost missed them. He cleared his throat. "I'm pretty sure answering your question is way more information than you want to know and that it's going to screw up any chance of us being friends. And I really want to be friends with you, Katniss."
Katniss frowned. "Peeta, if you don't talk to me about what happened at dinner, it's just going to confuse me more. Please? I'll remember that I was the one who pushed."
Peeta sighed, then nodded. "Delly and I were best friends. Her parents and mine were friends too, so it seemed natural that we would get together. Everything was good. At least, I thought it was. Right around the time my residency started, Delly started complaining that I wasn't paying enough attention to her, that I was always tired."
"I think your residency was reason enough to be tired."
He gave Katniss a small grin. "Anyway, she has always been a little on the uh, adventurous side. That year she decided on a very special birthday gift. One she thought we both would like."
He stopped and took a sip of his tea, letting that sink in.
Katniss watched him for a moment, working out the innuendo. When she realized what he meant, she blurted out, "Delly gave you a threesome for your birthday?"
His blush was all the answer she needed. "We both knew Bristel already and Delly thought she would be perfect for, well, for a few reasons. Anyway, we were celebrating - if you will - and I noticed that Delly was way more into Bee than me. When I brought it up, she broke down and admitted that she wanted us both. So we did that for a while – it took the pressure off of me and kept Delly happy while I finished up and got my practice together. And then I realized that I was really miserable and that I wanted someone who wanted me and me only."
He glanced at Katniss, gauging her reaction. "So I told Delly how I felt and we decided to go our separate ways. I moved to the city to start over and she moved to the city because her parents freaked out when they found out that she was a lesbian."
"What about yours?"
He shrugged. "My Mom thinks I'm a failure anyway, so this is just another way I've let her down." He paused to look at her through his lashes. "Did I scare you off?"
Katniss shrugged. "I'm not going to lie and say that's the story I expected. We are adults, though…but why would Delly bring up an old school crush?"
Peeta rubbed the back of his neck bashfully. "I think she wanted to do something nice for me because she feels like she owes me. You know, for hurting me with the divorce."
"Ah, I see." But Katniss really didn't. What did a crush from a million years ago have to do with the Peeta who stood before her? It was a mystery she'd have to solve later. "Do you mind if I use your bathroom?"
"No, go ahead. You'll probably want to use the one upstairs."
She winked at him and said with a laugh, "Good thing I know where it is."
Katniss couldn't get Peeta's words out of her head as she used the facilities and washed her hands: it made no sense to her that Delly and her girlfriend would make sure she understood that Peeta had wanted her back when they were in school. She trailed her hands down the bannister as she looked at the pictures lining the staircase. One in particular caught her eye: Delly and Peeta had their arms around each other, but a smiling Bristel had her hands behind Delly's head making bunny ears. All three of them looked younger and carefree: Bristel the perfect dark-haired contrast to the fairer Delly and Peeta.
Katniss stood closer to get a better look. Bristel's legs were tanned and lean, her dark hair gathered away from her face in a ponytail. In short, she looked just like half the people from their home town. Half the people. Katniss's half.
What was it Peeta had said? Delly thought she would be perfect for a few reasons. Bristel's words from earlier came back to her. He had a huge crush on you all through high school.
The room spun for a second and Katniss swore the very air around her changed. Could she be right? Because, if she was, then…then…. Delly had picked Bristel because she reminded Peeta of her.
Oh my God.
A rush of desire hit Katniss. She, like Peeta, wanted to be wanted by someone. What if that someone was Peeta? What if he still wanted her?
Katniss hadn't felt wanted – desired – in ages. Even at its best, her relationship with Gale always felt more Gale-centric. They did what Gale wanted in bed. Katniss went along with it because she didn't have much experience and because she wanted to please her husband. It hadn't seemed like that big a deal at the time.
Katniss walked back to the kitchen in a daze. She paused in the doorway taking in the slope of his shoulders and his hands where they rested on the magazine he was reading. She cleared her throat.
He startled. "I didn't hear you come back. Look, Katniss, I know tonight was a lot of information to process. And since we've already gone this far, I might as well confess the rest so it's all out in the open." He rubbed the bridge of his nose. "The truth is that I did have a crush on you through school. You were the first person I thought of when my marriage fell apart: I wondered where you were, how you were. When I found out you lived here, I imagined a million ways we might bump into each other. Then you came to my office…I couldn't believe that the odds could be in my favor that way."
Katniss stared at him, trying to take in everything he was saying.
He met her frank gaze for a moment before his own skittered away and she was reminded again of the furtive glances they shared in school.
Finally, he said, "I don't even know if you're seeing someone. Frankly, I have trouble believing that you –standing in my kitchen, dressed like that – aren't just a fantasy…" He trailed off. "I'm babbling like an idiot. Please, say something?"
"I'm not good at saying something." She considered him for a long moment before striding to him and tugging his lips down to hers.
She could feel his surprise in the stiffness of his lips, the light stubble on his jaw. Her hands tangled in the hair at his nape, tugging on the ends to keep his mouth on hers: it was the most forward thing she'd done in recent memory. She was just about to second-guess herself and pull away when his hands slid into her hair, his lips parting so his tongue could tangle with hers. He tasted like spicy tea and smelled like soap and some sort of light aftershave.
He pivoted so he could lean her back against the counter. Trailing his lips down her throat, his hands ghosted down her back to her hips while he slid a leg between hers. Katniss tugged at his tie, hoping he would take the hint. He yanked it off and she made short work of the buttons of his dress shirt. His skin was warm, his heart beat as fast as hers when she bowed her head and licked her way to his nipple. He moaned when she sucked gently.
"Katniss…God, I want you," Peeta breathed. She couldn't tell whether it was a warning or a plea for more.
"Should we go upstairs?" She took in his flushed face, his eyes closed and head thrown back. His hands clasped her hips, tightening into a death-grip at her words. She arched into them and let out a squeal of laughter when he stepped back, swept her into his arms, and carried her up the stairs.
"Wait," she said breathlessly on the stairs when she spied the picture of Peeta, Delly, and Bristel. "I should probably tell you that I'm not very adventurous. Gale used to…he used to complain that I was like white bread." She blushed.
A rumbling of laughter answered her as Peeta dropped a light kiss on her nose. "Katniss, my wife left me for another woman. I think white bread sounds delicious."
He took the stairs two at a time, easing her slowly to her feet only when they reached his bedroom. She paused for a moment, suddenly shy, until he leaned down and captured her lips once again. They kissed until she forgot to be nervous, until she forgot who she was and where she was and knew only that she wanted to be with him. Her hands tugged his shirt free while his unfastened her zipper. His hands hesitated on her shoulders, as if he couldn't fathom that she was really there. She answered him without words, tugging his belt free from his pants, then shimmying out of her dress.
He stood stock-still as she scooted onto the middle of the bed. "Thigh highs? Fuck."
Katniss grinned at his reaction and patted the bed next to her, motioning to his pants. "Get those off." When he was on the bed next to her, close enough to kiss, she whispered. "I'm too short for pantyhose to fit right. They give me elephant ankles."
He rose on his elbows and looked at her, his hot gaze lingering like a caress where the lace bands gripped her thighs below her black panties. "Thank God for elephant ankles," he said. It sounded like a prayer.
He traced her tattoo, first with his finger, then with his tongue. Katniss's breasts trembled with every inbound breath while he licked his way to her hip where the tattoo ended. She sought friction, writhing against him, grasping at his hips. She sobbed and arched into him as he edged a finger underneath the elastic to slip inside her.
She clawed at his underwear but he shook his head even as he intently watched his finger slide in and out. "I don't have any protection here. Just, let me do this?" He paused to nudge her legs wider after shedding her underwear. "You are perfect." She tangled her hands in his hair, tugging the ends as he nuzzled where her breast joined her body as his fingers built a relentless crescendo.
Katniss shook her head from side to side eyes tightly closed. "Peeta, please. Kiss me…"
"Kiss you? What a great idea." He shifted, easing over her.
Katniss mewled when his lips joined his hands. He tongued her, licking slowly at the moisture pooling where his fingers continued to drive her towards pleasure. When he dragged his tongue upward and sucked, Katniss screamed and flew apart. She trembled against him until her aftershocks subsided, then gripped his shoulders to drag him to her.
She kissed him. Her hands eased into his briefs and kneaded. Finally, she urged him onto his back. Pushing her hair behind her ear, she straddled him. Licking a path from his Adam's apple to his ear, she whispered, "Have you been tested?"
"We get screened regularly at work." He groaned as she rubbed against him through his underwear.
She bit his earlobe none-too-gently. "You know I have an IUD, so we could…" Her hands were already easing the elastic down his hips but faltered when he said nothing. "Peeta? Do you still want me?"
His hands slid up her spine and guided her back to meet his lips. Eyes shining, he said one word: "Always."
Katniss sighed into his kiss for a moment before becoming impatient and tugging on his briefs. "Get. These. Off."
He laughed and tugged them off. She straddled and slowly eased her hips to meet his, loving the hissing sound he made as she sheathed him. She almost laughed as he gathered pillows behind his head in a mad scramble. She started a slow rocking above him as Peeta leaned back and watched with hooded, dark eyes. She felt fuller than she had with Gale. But it wasn't that alone that had her savoring the feeling of him stretching her: he was so focused on her, so intent on her enjoyment, that each look, each moan, each glide of sweaty skin against skin was magnified. One stroke of her hips in particular had him tensing and gasping in such a delightful way that she found herself repeating the motion over and over. Finally, Peeta slid his arms around her and pulled her head down for a lingering kiss. Katniss couldn't be sure if it was the kiss or him moaning into her mouth as he trembled with release inside her which sent her over the edge as well.
Katniss swore she could still see stars behind her closed eyelids a few minutes later. "I think I need a doctor."
Peeta laughed as he, too, caught his breath. "Oh? That's too bad. Because I think you're going to have to find a new one."
She opened her eyes to find him staring at her in a way that made every butterfly in her stomach take flight. She moved off of his lap to cover her nerves. "But I just found one I like!"
"Did you?" His quiet answer was barely audible.
She could feel what he was asking, though, in the rapid beat of his heart below her cheek and the gentle touch of his hand as he brushed her hair back from her face. The kindness, the intensity, the interest she had always seen in the eyes of the boy he had been were nothing compared to the man he had become.
Was she brave enough, after all she had been through, to take a chance at happiness?
She hoisted herself up on one elbow. "I did. And I'm not in the market to change health care providers. At least, not for a while."
She couldn't mistake the look of happy relief that flashed in Peeta's eyes. He tugged her closer. "Good. Because I hear your choice isn't interested in taking new patients anymore, either. I have to be honest, though. That was probably the best…uh… therapy I have to offer."
A brief tug in the region of her heart made her nip at the tribal arm band tattoo circling the arm cradling her head. "Well, in that case, maybe we should make it a recurring appointment."
His chest rumbled with laughter. "Absolutely. At least once a day. Maybe more on weekends."
Katniss was quiet for a moment. "Peeta," she finally asked, "It's a weekend, right? I hope you brought your lab coat home because I think this house call could take a while."
-o-
"You're up early." Peeta stroked his brush down the canvas, filling in a last accent. The golden light of early morning streamed into the bedroom he used as a studio from the floor to ceiling windows they had installed together several months ago.
Katniss dropped a kiss on his head, his curls still tousled from sleep, and offered him a mug of steaming cinnamon tea. He put the paintbrush down on top of his pallet and placed the mug there as well. Sliding his arm around her, he carefully tucked her almost-naked skin against his and cradled her close.
"What is that, exactly?" Katniss's breath caught as Peeta moved her hair to the side and nuzzled her neck.
"I call it Fruit Still Life. Every dining room should have one." Peeta's hands roamed below Katniss's nightshirt, teasing and tweaking.
"Your hands are cold." She considered the painting for a minute, or perhaps she just wanted to feel those hands against her skin. Despite living together for a year, she was still surprised by his need to touch her. Or by her need to be touched. "It looks like a nude woman lying on a table."
Peeta bit her ear lobe. "Don't they say cold hands, warm heart? It looks that way because I used the day we finished the dining room as inspiration."
"Oh?" Katniss felt a rush of heat between her legs at both the memory and Peeta's growing erection.
"Remember the first thing we did after we finished moving the furniture in?" Peeta spread her legs outside his own. He dipped his fingertips inside her until she rubbed against him, spreading her moisture while he palmed her breast. "If I remember, it was a very, very special meal."
Katniss ached, remembering. Peeta had stripped her overalls off despite her laughing protests at being sweaty and dusty from painting and moving furniture. Lifting her onto the table, he had ravished her with his mouth until she was boneless and quivering. When she had claimed she was too tired to move afterward, he had carried her to the newly completed upstairs bath and they had christened the bathtub as well.
"I remember." She sighed as he slid one finger inside her, then two. She gave herself up to the sensations Peeta aroused before saying reproachfully, "We don't have time for this. I want to finish the downstairs half-bath before Bee, Delly, and Jo come over for dinner tonight. It's the only room we have left."
"We don't have to have it done by tonight. Besides," he coaxed as he fumbled with his briefs. "I must be doing something wrong if you're still talking." Lifting her hips, he slowly impaled her until her hips rested flush on his. He reverently eased her shirt off and kissed each inch of skin he exposed. "I'll never get tired of this."
He knew he had her when she began to ride him. "Maybe we could just close the door," she breathlessly agreed. "But we are not hanging that picture in our dining room."
Many thanks to Baronesskika and Doc for the beta work, as always. You guys are so special.
Soamazinghere and Honeylime08 furnished the prompt that gave this story life.
S2SL is a charity drive that benefits HopeforCaroline dot org. Many, many thanks to Streetlightlove for organizing the drive and keeping us all motivated, and Mr. Street for building the S2SL web site.
I'm on tumblr as sohypothetically if you want to stop by!