TITLE: Funny Bone
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.
SPOILERS: not a one.
Comments/concrit appreciated.
Funny Bone
One day, Fai decided he wanted to hear Kurogane laugh.
This was not as easy as Fai had thought it would be. Fai tried jokes: silly jokes, raunchy jokes, even puns. He tried visual humour: he wore a sparkly top hat and juggled, he yanked a never-ending string of flowers from his sleeve, he even pulled a rabbit out of a hat. He tried dressing up in strange outfits: a nurse's uniform, a French maid's uniform, a clown outfit, and a cat costume.
None of the jokes or tricks had the desired effect; Kurogane only stared at him like he was an idiot (and then said he was an idiot). The uniforms, at least, led to great sex. The clown outfit and the cat costume led to him being chased, and then great sex.
He tried tickling the ninja and poking him in various locations in search of other man's funny bone. But Kurogane never laughed, only growled at him to cut it out.
Fai was at a loss. He was starting to wonder if the stubborn ninja had a sense of humour at all.
Just when Fai was about to give up hope, they landed in mud.
Syaoran and Sakura had landed in a shallow part of the muddy swamp, while Kurogane and Fai were in the deeper part. Kurogane was sitting down, waist-deep in mud. Fai was not so fortunate; he had landed on his back.
Fai struggled against the sticky mud, into a sitting position. He lifted his arms and mud oozed in thick drips from his (formerly) white sleeves. A fat drop of dark mud fell from the hood of his (formerly) white coat and landed with a splat on his nose.
Fai wrinkled his nose in dismay. He was not happy.
Kurogane was staring at him.
"Ha ... ha ha ha ... ha ha ha ha ha!"
"What's that strange sound?" Mokona cried, fearfully. "It's scary!"
"Ha ha ha ha ha!"
"I think ..." Fai said slowly, starting to smile. "Kuro-chan is laughing at me."
"Oh! Kuro-chan is laughing?" Mokona giggled. "It sounds funny!"
"Shut up ..." Kurogane tried to sound angry and menacing, but failed because he was still laughing. "Damn manjuu!"
Grinning, Fai crawled over to the ninja on all fours, like some kind of slimy mud monster. "Are you laughing at me, Kuro-min?"
"Shut—up—!" Kurogane gasped, but he only laughed harder.
"I think Kuro-pon is laughing at me." The question was directed at the other three of the group, though Fai did not look away from the ninja, "What do you three think, hm?"
"Mokona thinks Kuro-daddy is laughing at Fai-mommy!"
Fai sat there for a moment, grinning, letting the mud drip and ooze from him as Kurogane's laughter continued. Fai decided that it was more than worth it to be covered in yucky mud, since the ninja's laughter was the result. Kurogane's laughter was deep and rich and rumbly and honest, and Fai liked the sound of it even more than he had thought he would.
"You have—mud!" Kurogane laughed. "In your hair!"
"I do." Fai agreed.
Then Fai raised his hand from the mud and plopped a large handful it onto Kurogane's head.
"Now we match!" Fai cried gleefully.
"You are dead!" Kurogane tried to shout, but he was still laughing.
Fai dodged away when Kurogane lunged after him. The stickiness of the mud was an impediment to their ususal chase, so Fai gathered another handful of mud and flung it at the ninja. Kurogane could not duck quick enough because of the sticky mud, and the mud-ball splattered on his face.
"Direct hit!" Fai exclaimed victoriously. He threw a few more mud-balls, hitting as much as missing.
Kurogane finally managed to catch the mage, and they both fell down into the mud. When they sat up, the two men were thoroughly saturated with dark, cold, oozy mud.
Fai only laughed. He slid over to Kurogane and deposited himself in the ninja's lap, then kissed him.
Kurogane made a noise and pushed the magician away. "That's disgusting. You taste like mud."
"I got Kuro-sama to laugh ..." Fai sang quietly. "If I'd known it was as easy as falling in the mud, I would have done it sooner."
Kurogane grumbled, although it was somewhat lacking his usual conviction, and wiped some mud from his face. Fai raised a hand and dripped some more mud onto the top of the ninja's head, giggling unrepentantly. Kurogane shoved mud down the back of the mage's (formerly) white coat. Fai shrieked and tried to squirm away, but Kurogane kept a hold on him.
"Mud war!" Fai declared cheerily, smashing handfuls of mud onto the ninja's cheeks.
Kurogane growled, "You bastard!" and pushed the wizard down into the mud again.
From the bank where he and Sakura had already climbed out of the muddy swamp (like the sensible people they were), Syaoran sighed as he watched the two men wrestle in the mud. "Sometimes I wonder whether we are really the parents and they are the children."