Partners…Even So

By: Liv-x-Case-Benson & Dark Wings of Imagination

Chapter 1: Vent

She sighed, passing streetlamp after streetlamp as she stopped on the opposite side of her destination and killed the motor. She rested her head in her hands. The object of this little trip wasn't to convince him to come back, or tell him off and she knew that.

She just figured, after twelve years, she deserved some explanation. Not just Cragen saying he'd put his papers in. She didn't blame him. It would be hard on anyone, the last case he'd done.

A shooting of defense is just that, two, or three…no matter how many times. She didn't blame him.

Still though she had been close to the age of his eldest daughters, something she bet no one had bothered to think about.

Kathy saw the lights first and shook him awake. Elliot sat up and noticed the car hadn't just passed by, but was sitting there. He stood up and saw Olivia leaning against the car.

Kathy walked up behind him and kissed his shoulder. "Go," she said. "She deserves to know after twelve years," she sighed. "I'd assume she feels more than a little jilted. I would."

He turned to her, pulling on jeans and a t-shirt, sighing. "I don't even know what to say."

"Don't think. Just let them flow," she said, kissing him.

Olivia was surprised to see the lights inside the house flick on and, as the front door opened, she saw him.

He started to make his way towards her, unsure of what he'd say. When he'd finally gotten close enough to her, he stopped and they stood there for a few moments incapable of saying anything.

"Hi." It's the only word that escaped Olivia's mouth. She knew why she had come, but seeing him after all this time made her mind stop just for a few moments.

"Hi," Elliot said back, unable to find anymore words. He knew what had both of them standing there at that moment, but for some reason the words just couldn't find their way to his lips.

"Let's walk," Elliot suggested, and both of them began walking with no direction in mind.

After a few moments of walking in silence Olivia spoke. "Elliot, I'm going to be straight here. We've been friends and partners for twelve years. I think I have a right to get, at least, an explanation."

"Yes, you do. And I am really willing to give it to you."

Olivia saw the uncertainty in his eyes. "So? What's your 'explanation'? For that matter, how could you just leave and tell me absolutely nothing, Elliot?! I thought our friendship, our partnership, mattered to you!"

He could see the hurt in her eyes and it made him feel sick because he knew he was the one who caused it.

She stopped. "Elliot, was it because she reminded you of your daughter? Because I can understand that."

"Yes, but not just because of that. The shooting, that girl, it all made me realize that I didn't know what I was doing anymore. I didn't even recognize myself. Everything that I ever valued, all my life, suddenly didn't mean anything and it wasn't right. So the only way out I thought was leaving, but I know I should've talked to you. You were my partner and if anyone needed to know about my decisions, it had to be you. I'm sorry I didn't contact you."

"Why didn't you? You know you can tell me anything."

"I know and I was about to, I really was, but every time I tried, the images of that day haunted me again."

She sighed. "I believe it, but you still could've talked to me. You...you just made me feel like I wasn't worth your time. I know you didn't mean to, but..."

"I know. I was a jerk. Is there any way I can make it up to you?"

She thought a moment. "Just don't leave me again," she said, leaning against him, trembling. "Can we still have our late-night coffees once in a while? Or lunch? I just...I know I'm rambling, but..."

He smiled a small smile and said, "Of course. I miss these too." He put his arms around her and held her tight, only now realizing how much he had missed her.

She lost all her self-control, crying hysterically into his shoulder, beating against his chest, becoming weaker with each hit. "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! How could you be such an ass? Twelve damn years!" she said, shoving him. "Twelve! What? Did you think you could just walk away from me and I'd forget?" she was rambling, badly. She knew it, but this had bubbled underneath the surface since she heard he'd left.

He didn't move. He knew that she needed to let all these feelings out. When she tried to shove him out once more, he wrapped his arms around her tighter than the last time

She struggled. "Let me go! Let me GO!"

"No. I won't make the same mistake twice," he said and continued to hold her.

She shook harder. "H-how could y-you just leave me alone? Damn it!"

"I honestly don't know. But I promise I won't leave you, ever," he said hoping she would believe his promise and would stop trying let go of him, because, right now, all he needed was her.

She looked up at him. "I...could go for a coffee."

"Ok," he rested an arm around her shoulder as they made their way towards a coffee shop. There were just so many things they needed to fix. A coffee was really welcomed then.

Olivia took his arm. "Can we go in and sit?"

"Sure." It was all Elliot said.

Author Note: I know I usually don't write this pairing, but this story just needed to be written. It will be a multiple chapter.

Please R&R!

Liv-x-Case-Benson & Dark Wings of Imagination