The first thing he was aware of was he pounding – how the light was too harsh even through his eyelids; how that noise grated on his actual brain; and the sheets that chafed his skin so violently.

He groaned stilling all movements, but the crawling feeling remained inside him and – there! Remus rolled to the side and threw up wretchedly over the side of his bed. Actually, that made things a bit better.

He opened his eyes at the chuckling, just so that he could glare at whoever it was, and promptly snapped them shut again.

He was never drinking alcohol again.

Ever.

Sirius chuckled again as his friend groaned and moaned, rolling around in bed and then alternately lying very still as he tried to find someplace more comfortable. Sirius wished him luck.

On the bed next to him, James was slugging water like it was going out of fashion, and Peter was throwing up in the bathroom. As for himself – Sirius had his fair share of hangovers, and whilst this was far from being the most mild, neither was it the worst. He'd be fine in a couple of hours – and it was so worth it!

Lily grabbed onto the side of the toilet bowl again, but the nausea passed without making itself felt any more tangibly.

Marlene soothed hr hair back from her face, handing her a bottle of water to wash away the acid in her mouth.

"Why does Lily get the toilet?" She heard Mary grumble apologetically, and slipped out, taking with her the brief respite from the ache in her head.

Lily slumped against the granite countertop, her face sagging miserably – nothing was worth this!

Mar at least looked in a better state than Lily did. Her hair was tied back where Lily's was everywhere – and she managed a grimace that could even have been a smile, albeit an ugly one.

"I'm a mess," Mary moaned, resting her head against Marlene's cool arm.

"Yes," Marlene agreed, smiling down at her hung-over friend.

"I hate Sirius Black," Mary said, hr voice devoid of all emotion – dead, helpless.

"Yes," Marlene said calmly – though, as she did she got a vivid flashback to the previous night, where Mary and Sirius had been partaking in a private activity that didn't look particularly malicious to her

Why people insisted on drinking alcohol until they were in that state bypassed her completely.

"You girls look worse than I feel," Sirius greeted cheerfully, taking the chair to Marlene's right.

Lily and Mary shot him looks of pure hatred, and Marlene smothered a laugh as she took a sip of her pumpkin juice.

Sirius looked her over – those cool grey eyes expressionless – and raised an eyebrow, "You really didn't have a drop, did you McKinnon?"

Marlene shrugged, "You wouldn't know, you were busy." She looked pointedly at Mary, whose only visible feature was her brunette hair as she stared mournfully at her plate.

Sirius followed her gaze and smirked, "Yes, I was busy. But guess what -" he paused dramatically, "I'm psychic."

Marlene looked back, unimpressed. There were some things that living in close contact with Sirius Black taught you – and not trusting a word her said was one of them.

"You're psychic." She drawled, mockingly, just as the rest of the boy's crew reached them.

"Caught me," James Potter agreed, helping himself to the last of the orange juice.

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Not you, I'm psychic!"

James shook his head at Marlene when Sirius glanced the other way, and she smiled back.

"So what am I thinking now?" She challenged, taking a bite from the eggs growing cold on her plate.

A strange expression crossed Sirius' face as they looked on – a blankness that conveyed concentration.

"You look constipated." Marlene told him.

"McKinnon," He warned right back, without blinking.

As though from a trance, Sirius shook himself awake, looking startled as he glanced around at them all. Marlene smirked at his antics.

"So?" She wanted to know, leaning in and narrowing her eyes.

Sirius leant backwards, glancing down his own body in surprise to a part of his anatomy that she could guess at, "McKinnon! You have a boyfriend!" He put on a scandalised tone.

Marlene and James laughed loudly, whilst Sirius feigned blushing.

"Shut up!" Remus groaned loudly from opposite Sirius, closing his eyes and putting his head in his hands.

Marlene, still giggling, gave and apology, taking another hearty bite of her breakfast.

"So how come you two don't look so hard done by?" She waved her fork at James and Sirius, who both leant backwards to avoid being hit by lingering eggs. "You must have had the most to drink, between the two of you."

James shrugged his broad shoulders, pulling a face, "We're just used to it." Sirius nodded his agreement.

"Good for fucking some." Lily growled from her end of the table – her first coherent words of the morning.

Sirius craned around Marlene to get a look at the unfortunate ginger, but James, who was on the opposite side of the table, didn't have to and was already talking by the time that Sirius saw her.

"Not feeling too good, Evans?" He teased gently, grinning as he paused in eating his breakfast.

Lily took a deep breath.

Sirius groaned softly, and exchanged a look with Marlene. Here they went.

"Do I look like I want to talk to you, Potter?" She snapped taking forehead from the table to pierce him with tired, angry eyes.

James was unperturbed, "Just saying. I mean, you're always saying about setting a good example and here you are – not even seventeen!" No one bothered to point out that he, too, was underage.

"Let's get you two back upstairs," Marlene got to her feet, helping Lily shakily to hers.

Lily opened her mouth to retort something to James, but snapped her mouth shut again just as nausea surged again.

"C'mon Mare," Marlene beckoned, and the smallest member of the group rose to her feet silently and followed down the hall.

"Pass the bacon," James asked Sirius, as they left.

"Hope he chokes on it," Lily muttered, and Marlene laughed. She half-carried the other two up two flights of stairs, along several corridor and through too many doors, she left Lily in bed tucked Mary in and left a bucket by both of their beds. She picked up her book, flicked out the light and, with soft steps, hurried downstairs to the coon room and the fire.

""If you will thank me, let it be for yourself alone. That the wish of giving happiness to you might add force to the other inducements which led me on, I shall not deny. But your family owe me nothing.""

Marlene sighed to herself, curling into a ball and reading quietly out loud to herself.

""Much as I respect them, I believe, I thought only of you,"" a second voice finished in her ear, wrapping around her heart as she leant back into the heat of the body that joined her on the soft sofa.

"Will," she whispered, and he kissed her shoulder through her cardigan. "I wasn't expecting you back today."

"I missed you," her boyfriend of three years replied and she turned to look at him – his brown eyes and blonde hair, his crooked teeth, his freckles.

"I missed you, too," she kissed him softly and felt them fit back together like serrated edges of broken glass; truly, she was only whole when she was with him.

"Pride and Prejudice?" He asked breathlessly when she pulled away, turning the book so that he could see the cover. "Is that a first edition?" He smiled in wonderment, his fingers trailing the old pages.

Mary hummed into his neck.

"Where'd you get that?" Will wanted to know.

Marlene smiled, "The love of my life gave it to me." She pulled back, tracing his jaw with her fingernails.

"Sounds like a cool guy," Will swallowed as her fingernails grazed his Adam's apple.

"He is."

Will nodded, "He must love you a lot."

"He does."

Will moved in to kiss her again, hr eyelashes fluttering closed.

"Will-boy!" A figure hurtled between them, taking up most of the room on the love-seat and forcing them apart. "You're back!"

Will rubbed his nose, "Hello Sirius."

Sirius grinned, "Hi."

There was a beat of awkwardness where Marlene and Will tried to remember where – and maybe what – they were, and Sirius waited for them to be at the appropriate stage.

"So how was your Christmas?" He asked finally, when he got bored.

"Good. Uneventful." Will summed up shortly.

"Boring, then," Sirius commented, reaching for Marlene's book. She pulled it out of reach and he stuck out his tongue.

"You didn't go back to James'?" Will asked, his voice just ever so slightly biting. Marlene recognised the feeling – she wanted Sirius to go, too.

"He stayed," Sirius said lightly, the give going either above his head or ignored. "His parents had work." He picked up the paper from the low table next to the sofa.

Will sighed – they would never get him to leave, now.

However Sirius, never one to be bound by expectations or able to resist surprising people, then hopped to his feet, grinned down at the infuriated couple and bounded off, whistling to himself tunelessly.

Marlene rolled her eyes skywards, fighting to find the place their conversation had been at before.

"So, where did you find it?" She looked to her book, the smile already spreading over her face as she envisioned the hours-long hunt through London, the wheedling of the old storekeeper to give up his most prized possession – how he told him all about his girlfriend, Marlene, and how it was her favourite book, and how this, finally swung the decision n his favour.

"Well," Will began, tucking her under his arm as he began his narrative.

Lily's hand didn't drop to her pocket immediately. Maybe because, although attacks on muggle-borns were becoming frequently more common (though everyone would deny it) she recognised the hand on her arm; maybe it was because she was hung-over.

Either way, the boy spoke before she had time to reach for her wand.

"Lily," Severus Snape whispered, pulling her into the deserted classroom he had been waiting in.

"Severus!" She hissed, rubbing her wrist where he had seized her as she watched him close the door and lean against it, arms folded.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, looking at the floor, and in it echoes a thousand apologies – each one sincere, but each one to be followed by a new one.

Lily looked at her childhood best friend, "It's fine," She promised, but she didn't take a step forward to receive his embrace as she would once have done. "But what do you want, Snape?"

He flinched when she used his surname; it hurt her, too.

"Lily, please," he started, taking a step forwards and extending an arm in supplication, "I'm sorry!" His mouth – usually so inexpressive – pinched down n the corners, "I didn't mean to, I would never mean to," he hesitated, barely discernible but she caught it, "hurt you." He finished.

Lily smiled slightly, "I know."

The boy blinked at her – his black eyes hidden for the briefest of seconds and when they returned they were reluctantly surprised, "You know?"

"Of course I know," she sighed, "you wouldn't want me hurt." It was all true, so far, what they were saying. Severus never would hurt her, not on purpose.

Something passed between them, not tangible but there to be taken if they so wished. Neither of them moved, the moment passed, and Severus spoke.

"Well then, why can't we be like before?" For a heartbeat, he was the little boy Lily had first met – the one that brought her dreams to life, who could make all her wildest imaginings true; who was admirable, because no matter how difficult his situation he still made the most of it – for her.

And then the illusion shattered, he was sixteen and he had broken her heart.

"Like before?" Lily scoffed, turning away and running a hand through her hair. Her head hurt, her bones ached; she had only gotten up to grab some food and water.

When she turned back, Severus had appraised her fully for the first time.

"Rough night?" He asked, eyes hooded. Now, when his mouth turned the wrong way it was in distaste; Severus didn't approve of getting drunk – it was childish, he said.

In the way he always had, Severus got under her skin, "It was New Year's Eve!" She defended herself, hugging her arms around her body.

"Exactly!" Severus took a step away from the door, towards her; she stepped back and he checked himself. "Lily," he whispered, "it's a new year! Forgive and forget? Turning over a new leaf? It was you who used to like clichés like that!"

Lily couldn't deny that – she still used clichés overly.

Tears pricked her eyes. She didn't want to be here, having this conversation in this dark and dingy room. She didn't want to think about what happened between them; or what could still happen between them. She missed him; and all he was doing was reminding her of that. But she couldn't just forgive him, could she?

But she missed him.

"Please let me out" She whispered, turning her head away to try to hide the tears in her eyes.

He didn't miss them, though, "Lily! Lily, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." his voice trailed off.

And wasn't that the point of it; he never meant to hurt her.

Abashed, silenced, Severus took a step away from the door and opened it for her.

She was going to sweep past without looking at him, without talking to him; she would put this conversation – make that this whole day – in the box filed to never be opened in her mind.

But she couldn't.

Because, as much as Severus never meant to hurt her neither did she ever meant to hurt hi, and that would.

"I'll think about it," She said, and she left.

Far above them a boy – the same age – sat cross legged on his bed. Two of his friends slept soundly, and he was looking for the third. He hadn't meant to see, but found himself watching two black dots in a lowly room until one managed to eave.

He could imagine her being sad to go.