A/N: This is a project between ImprecantesStellam and myself, Lovin' Big Time Rush. We hope you enjoy it and give us feedback!
So I know this is ImprecantesStellam's A/N because they wrote this chapter, but since it is on my account, I have to hack it. Its for a good reason though! So I know personally I hate reading a chapter story and waiting for the next chapter, so if you guys do then guess what! There's this story where you don't have to wit, because it is already finished! Well there's a sequel...but the first ones finished! Lol. After you read this and review, you should go check it out! It's called Haunted and it's by the one and only ImprecantesStellam! It's a wonderful story and i fell in love with, and i just know you guys will too! So go check it out, and shhhh i wasn't here ;).
It had been twenty-nine weeks; two-hundred and five days; four-thousand, nine-hundred and twenty hours; He could remember the exact date he asked him to stay with him forever and portray their love around the world. It had been that long since he had accepted, and opened the pathway to a portal of peace, prosperity, and passion. Yet, it was not a pathway that was smooth. There were pebbled turned here and there, and sometimes he saw cracks on the stone-padded walkway. He always did his best to stir the duo from even touching those cracks, but it was sometimes inevitable. However, it was no longer the physical pain he felt that hurt him the most. It was no longer the physical actions of touching the crack on the pathway. It was the fact that he caused it.
He was the one who was suspicious. He was the doubtful one. He was the ambiguous one. He was the indecisive one. It was almost magical what being around him did. He shifted from the fierce, protective leader to the obscure enigma. Only he could do that to him. It was so spellbinding how he did that to him. And to further emphasize the magical aspects of their loving relationship, it impressed him to see that he changed as well. He became the self-assured, confident one, always helping him along. He was the one who calmed him down. He protected him, whenever they were alone. It was truly breathtaking to see so much magical love in the air.
He had been told ninety-seven times that he was loved by him. It was something that always made him fill up with excitement and butterflies. Even when it was meant as a form of expression for finding his medical book, or making him a cup of coffee as they ran out to meet the neurotic Gustavo for rehearsal, it always gave him this feeling of joy, exhilaration. It made him feel as if he was empowered enough to run a marathon. It made him feel as if he could take on the world. Those three words were a magical incantation for some ancient magic that Kendall knew nothing of, but only basked in its spiritual effects.
While it made him feel powerful, it also made him feel weak. It made his knees buckle. It made him flutter in weakness. It made him feel that it was not genuine. It made him feel that it was not true. It made him feel that it was forced and a lie. It was this voice in the back of his head, that whispered silently like a cutthroat whispering the last words to his prey. He hated the feeling, but it was always there. It was this pervading presence that perverted his perfect passionate pertinence with the band's genius.
He, Kendall Donald Knight, was hopelessly in love with Hortense Logan Philip Mitchell. Every beat of his heart was in Logan's name, and every breath he breathed was for the shorter boy. However, each tear he shed alone at night was in Logan's name. Every time he doubted his perfect relationship with the boy, he could not take it. He wanted to believe each word Logan said to him. He wanted to live in that vision Logan had for both of them. He wanted to know that Logan truly would be there for him.
Kendall Knight could take on the world. True to his surname, he would gallantly fight on the front line to protect those he loved, and practice chivalry with his beloved. He could shine to the world in his armor. Yet, his source of power was his biggest weakness. It killed him to even see a flicker of doubt paint itself across Logan's face. Logan claimed it was never there, and Kendall would act coaxed, but the nagging voice inside his head always proved otherwise.
James Diamond and Carlos Garcia, the two best friends of Kendall and Logan, accepted the relationship jubilantly. One of Kendall's initial concerns was not that he would be ostracized with his brothers, but that Logan would. Kendall never wanted to see even a small paper-cut from flipping the massive biology book Logan tugged around. It was as if Kendall was an artist, and Logan was his masterpiece. However, Kendall was not the compulsive or possessive type. He knew that Logan was going to be there for him, even if the voice inside his head made him doubt it.
Kendall was never a perfectionist. That title belonged to Logan. However, he wanted his relationship with Logan to be perfect. He wanted them to be the lovers that functioned truly as two bodies, but one soul. He wanted them to be the lovers that still played romantic pranks on each other despite being in a nursing home. He wanted them to be the lovers that could go out in public and hold hands.
Of course, the last desire was a bit too incredulous for Kendall's current situation. Kendall, Logan, James, and Carlos were the foursome that was Big Time Rush. They had conquered over the evil that was the production company, and finally were reaping what they sew. They had won many hearts from teenage girls around the world, and especially by the fan-mail they received, it was no secret that Big Time Rush was popular. Small countries, like Kerplankistan, fawned over the boys. They had their own unique spin that brought them ahead of other past boy-bands, like Boy Quake. The sad reality was that, while it was already an anxious moment upon coming out to Mrs. Knight, Katie, James, and Carlos, the process of repeating that action for Gustavo, Kelly, and Griffin was far more ominous. Kelly would be able to handle it, but Kendall could see the tears coming down Logan's face when Gustavo would yell at them and when Griffin would imminently try and break them apart for his company.
Kendall Donald Knight desired, cherished, wanted, and loved Hortense Logan Philip Mitchell. Yet, the only thing keeping them from reaching the zenith of their love...was Kendall himself.