Disclaimer: All rights to the name "Kodomo No Jikan" belong to Kaworu Watashiya and any of her affiliates. I neither own this franchise nor do I profit from the writing of this story.
Author's Note: Another Kodomo No Jikan fic this time featuring some graphic material of a highly neglected character in this community, Shirai Sae. Truth be told I thought this character to be really pretty, in her own way, and found that no one has written anything about her. Thus I have taken the liberty in doing so myself. This one shot will be graphic. Anyway, enjoy.
Daisuki Aoki sighed in resignation as he eyed the mountain of paper work at his desk. The sun was already beginning to set and it felt like he had made no headway in completing his work. It was times like these that he wondered if he was truly cut out to be a teacher. He had already been teaching for three years and he still felt like he didn't know what he was doing.
His thoughts strayed to the first year he taught and the little girl that had caused him so much grief and joy at the same time. Kokonoe Rin was a child that he held close to his heart. He adored her but he couldn't stomach the infatuation she had with him. It was beyond disturbing but as time went on Rin soon started to lose interest in him as a lover. Mature as she was for her age she still didn't comprehend the magnitude of her affections for him. She still visited him from time to time but their relationship had panned out to a normal one shared between a teacher and student.
Aoki was proud that she was excelling in her classes and couldn't believe that she would be going to secondary school next year. How time seemed to fly.
The young teacher was pulled out of his musing when he heard the door of the staff room opening to reveal an irate Shirai Sae. Aoki braced himself knowing that he was about to get grilled by his colleague.
"Honestly how terribly unprofessional of you to procrastinate until the last minute. It makes me wonder just how you can even keep your class functioning." said the older teacher sternly.
Aoki winced when he heard Sai's words.
"I-I'm truly sorry. I really am trying my best though." replied Aoki.
"Hmph. You have been teaching here at Futatsubashi Elementary for three years and still you are unreliable. Always late in turning in the progress reports and report cards. You're messy and unorganized and worst of all a complete push over. How many times have I been forced to intervene in your classes for your inability to maintain control? The children walk all over you and you honestly believe that you are still teaching them something worthwhile? I am not the one you should be apologizing to Aoki-sensei. Apologize to your students for not taking your job seriously and their parents who have entrusted their children to you."
Aoki felt like Atlas at the moment as the entire weight of the world seemed to burden his shoulders. His eyes were downcast from the flogging he had received from his colleague. Everything Shirai Sae was saying true which made the entire situation even worse. Aoki felt his self-esteem plummet and wondered once again if he had made the right decision to teach.
His father, Daisuke Goro, was old school and was of the mind that only women were teachers and men had to be outside doing REAL work, like construction, farming or joining the police to keep the peace. While Aoki's mother was understanding of his decision this caused a schism between Aoki and his father. The two hardly talked anymore and Aoki wondered if perhaps his father had been right. Would he had been better suited for intense physical labor or work in the corporate world?
Then to have Shirai Sae belittle him every chance she had and Aoki felt like he should just give up and do something else with his life. Clearly he was failure at teaching if Sae's words were true and Aoki knew she was right. No matter how hard he tried it just wasn't enough. Failure was something he could tolerate for so long before there was a breaking point.
Aoki was dangerously close to his and Shirai Sae was the one to shatter it as she spoke once more.
"You have no respect for yourself or for your work. It may not be in my place to say this but you should really consider looking for another career because it is obvious to me that you do not care about teaching or your students."
With those words something snapped inside of Aoki.
For the past three years he knew that Shirai Sae didn't get along with him but for her to state plainly that he should give up and leave tipped him over the edge. In a flash Aoki stood up and slammed his hand against the desk. Shirai Sae was caught by surprise and immediately took a reflexive step back from the angry young man before her.
"Every single day for the past three years you have been belittling me. Always quick to judge and criticize but unwilling to offer assistance. Fine. I understand that it is my responsibility to learn from my mistakes. I am not perfect and, for the most part, you are right. I am unorganized and slow to submit the progress reports. But do not think for a second that I do not care about my students. It is because I cherish my students that I put up with your incessant hen pecking and not leave this job for something else."
"You tell me that I do not care for my students and yet you have not lifted one finger to assist me. As a senior colleague of mine you have more experience in teaching and instead of imparting your wisdom you use it as a means to put me down. I mean if you care so much about my students wouldn't you have taken the time to at least guide me? Show me that there is a better way. However you don't care about my students. You only use them as another means in belittling me. Now that I think about it you're pathetic. It seems that the only joy you get out of your life is by making mine as miserable as yours. For someone who vaults herself as the strict authoritarian that's pretty immature."
Shirai Sae was taken aback by Aoki's harsh rebuttal and, for the moment, she was unable to reply. However she soon regained her wits and turned red in anger as she replied hotly.
"It is not my obligation to hold your hand Aoki-sensei!"
"Really Shirai-sensei? Then why are you so adamant in criticizing my teaching style?" replied Aoki angrily.
The older woman stared at Aoki harshly. The light gleamed off her glasses giving her a menacing expression.
"Because I know for a fact that it's wrong. What kind of teacher gives points to a child just because they are 'trying' or 'working hard' despite the fact that they have gotten the answers wrong on a test? It is EXPECTED of our students to try their best and work hard. If they truly are putting forth an effort then their reward will a good grade. THAT is how you reward hard work and effort Aoki-sensei. To be giving freebies to your students is not only irresponsible but harmful to the child themselves. They will never understand that sometimes, regardless of their hard work, they will fail. This is a lesson they must learn early on so that, when they become adults, they are ready and not dismayed when they do fail. Instead they will learn from their failure and overcome it! That, in my opinion, is the most important lesson I can ever teach these children! Because the world is messed up and cruel and will not care if they tried hard or not. Results are all that matter! Hard work and effort are ingredients to success but not success itself! It is because I teach my children this that they go out and learn how to survive in a world that wants to tear them apart!"
"By your need to reward the hard work and effort of your students you are doing them a grave injustice! Not only is it irresponsible but also cowardly! When a child does poorly on a test or on their progress reports it is expected that there is going to be a reaction from the parents. You think you are so clever handing out freebies so you don't have to deal with the emotional distress of the child or the anger of a parent and then giving it some cock and bull label, by giving points for 'hard work'. How stupidly selfish Aoki-sensei! The children love you because you give them good grades just for 'trying' and you think you are somehow doing them a favor? What will happen once they get to middle school and realize that the teachers there won't reward them just for trying? Do you want to know what happens to those children? They give up. They find out that if their hard work doesn't gain some form of recognition or points then they no longer strive to work. They soon start to resent their future teachers because they think they are being mistreated in some way and cease to become productive."
"By your supposed kindness you are enabling their failure! They will never reach their full potential because they are too easily discouraged by the fact that their hard work isn't being rewarded. They grow up believing that they MUST get rewarded by trying when, in reality, hard work and effort are supposed to be vital tools to help them achieve success not cultivate success out of their virtue alone. And it is a tool they will have to use many times, even when it has failed them, in order to reap their reward. No Aoki-sensei you do not care about your students. I pity them knowing that the moment they leave your class they are handicapped and forced to compete with other students better taught then they are. I have tried to help you many times Aoki-sensei but apparently all it is to you is my pathetic attempt to impart my misery onto you. If that is all you see it as then perhaps I truly have been wasting my time."
With that Shirai Sae turned and left the staff room leaving a very stunned Aoki to his thoughts.
Since that day Shirai Sae had refused to speak to Aoki. Their two close associates, Kenta Oyajima and Hoin Kyoko, noticed the tension but wisely kept their opinions to themselves. As such the staff room had become a place of awkward silence with Shirai Sae acting even more standoffish than usual.
Aoki had been having a more difficult time lately in getting his class under control. During his first year teaching Rin Kokonoe had helped him by using her influence in class to keep her peers in check and the class his second year was small and well behaved.
However this year he ended up with thirty five children in class and all of them seemed to have limitless energy. Not only were they rowdy but they also had a very difficult time understanding the material which he was trying to teach them. Their grades started to suffer despite his boosting them because they were 'trying'. It seemed like he was at the end of his rope.
Then, one day, at the beginning of his conference period he was asked to deliver some paper work to Shirai Sae's class. Aoki gulped and started to sweat nervously. He had not forgotten their argument nor the painful lesson which she imparted on him.
When he entered the room he found the children running around and being rowdy. Shirai Sae was nowhere in sight and at once Aoki tried to get the class to calm down.
"Children! I need you all to sit down! Just because your teacher isn't here doesn't mean you can run around." said Aoki as he placed the paper work on his colleague's desk.
One of the children, a stout looking boy, stuck his tongue out at him and continued to run about the class. He tried to get some of the girls to sit at their assigned seats only to have them roll their eyes at him. A paper plane flew by and hit him on the face causing the entire class to erupt in laughter at him. Aoki couldn't believe how horrible these children were. He thought his class was rowdy. At least they pretended to listen to him. These kids, however, had absolutely no respect for him.
It was at that moment that the door to the classroom opened suddenly and the class immediately became silent as Shirai Sae strode in. Aoki couldn't believe just how powerful and commanding her presence was so much so that he nearly jumped aside as she walked past him. As she did Aoki noticed that Sae had let her hair down instead of having it up on a bun or a ponytail. Without even realizing it Aoki blushed at the sight.
H-Has Shirai-san always looked this...gorgeous?
Shaking his head Aoki remembered why he was here in the first place and soon went to speak to his colleague.
"I'm sorry for interrupting your class Shirai-sensei but I was asked to bring these papers to you." said Aoki.
Shirai Sae hardly regarded him as she looked over the papers and then nodded in approval.
"Thank you for bringing in my assignments Aoki-sensei. You may leave now."
With that Aoki felt his shoulders slump as he started toward the door. Even so as he turned around he could see the students all giving Shirai Sae their absolute attention. Something which he wished he could do with his own students. It was then that a strange idea came to his mind. He had a feeling that he might be rejected but even so he felt that it was worth a shot.
Coming back inside the classroom he made his way toward his colleague who didn't look amused at his return.
"May I speak with you for a moment Shirai-sensei?"
The older woman narrowed her eyes for a moment but soon relented. She turned her attention back to her class.
"I am going to speak with Aoki-sensei outside for a minute. I do not want to hear a single word! When I get back inside we are going to review both numerators and denominators in fractions. I expect you all to look over the material before I come back inside."
There was a great shuffling going on as the students brought their math books out and proceeded to study the material that Shirai Sae had assigned to them. Seeing that they were occupied she then stepped outside with Aoki.
"What is it Aoki-sensei?" asked Sae harshly.
It was difficult for Aoki to get his bearings together. The argument from last week was still fresh in his mind and he hoped that he didn't say anything stupid.
"I-I just want to apologize to you Shirai-sensei. After having spoken to each other last week I have thought about your words and my short comings as a teacher. Even so I didn't realize the extent of my short-comings until I had come to your classroom. I had thought that I had the roughest class in the entire school. It was...I mean...still is difficult for me to control them. When I had come to deliver the math assignments to your class I was shocked at how rowdy your class was. I tried to get them to behave but they completely blew me off. I couldn't even begin to start in getting them to settle down. Yet when you walked in they automatically became silent and started to behave. They gave you their undivided attention despite the fact they wouldn't give me the time of day. It was then that I realized just how much I have to learn in being a good teacher. Sure I can praise my students all I want but if they don't respect me enough to listen to the valuable lessons that I'm trying to teach them then I'm not doing my job."
"Your apology is accepted then Aoki-sensei."
"Thank you Shirai-sensei but I have also asked you out here for a request. Will you give me permission to observe your class during my conference period? It is obvious that to become a good teacher I must learn from the best."
To Aoki's surprise he could see Sae blushing lightly from the compliment that he had given her. She looked unsure...even vulnerable. Aoki could feel his heart racing from the sight.
S-She really is gorgeous. I think this is the first time I have ever seen her blush like this.
Meanwhile Sae was having conflicting thoughts of her own. While she wasn't surprised at her younger colleague offering his apology what did throw her off was the compliment in his request. Shirai Sae always had a high opinion of her teaching style but it wasn't something that anyone else acknowledged. Hoin-sensei often was at odds with her and Oyajima-sensei was indifferent. Despite her classes consistently making the highest marks only the principal of the school had thought to compliment her efforts.
It wasn't like she needed affirmation from anyone else at least that was what she told herself. But now that someone had actually taken the time to compliment her, well she couldn't help it.
I-I can't believe I'm blushing like a silly high schooler and from Aoki-sensei of all people. I hope he hasn't noticed.
Shaking her head she shook herself from her stupor and resumed her normal countenance.
"Very well. If you believe that my methods will be of use to you then you are welcome to attend my class during your conference period. However I ask that you do not draw attention to yourself nor will you assist my students or speak to them. If you disrupt my class even once then I will ask you to leave and never come back. Understood?"
"Understood Shirai-sensei."
From that time forward Aoki went in to observe Sae's class during his conference period and even took the liberty of getting a spiral so that he could take notes. He could see that from the very start of the class period to the end that she maintained control of her class and never let up.
She was quick to subdue any sign of disruption and yet was able to give positive attention when need be. She often assigned some of the rowdier, more restless children on small tasks such as taking papers to the office or another class room, having them take out the trash or assist her in handing out the class assignments. He wondered why Sae would let the rowdiest children have the most freedom and he made sure to make a question out of that to ask her at a later time.
In fact his spiral became full very quickly with notes and questions that he wanted to follow up with Sae at a later time. However it was difficult to be alone with her long enough to get the clarification he needed. The only time they were available were on the weekends.
It was then that he realized that he could ask Sae to meet him at a restaurant or something to go over his notes. However the more he thought about it the more like it sounded like he was trying to ask her on a date.
At the end of the week Aoki made up his mind to ask Sae to meet with him on Saturday. As he walked into the staff room he saw both Hoin and Kenta were there along with Sae. He almost backed out of asking Sae to meet with him but shook his head.
This is not a date. I'm simply asking her to meet with me tomorrow so that I can follow up on some questions I have regarding my observation of her class. It has nothing to do with the fact that she is a gorgeous woman or that I can't seem to get her off of my mind the past few days.
Gathering his courage he made his way toward Sae's desk all the while feeling like his heart was going to burst out of his chest. He stood before her as she was working on some paperwork and soon looked up to acknowledge him.
"Yes Aoki-sensei? May I help you?" offered Sae in a not so inviting tone.
"S-Shirai-sensei. I-I was wondering if you would be willing to meet with me tomorrow and g-get something to eat."
Aoki gulped as he finished the question and then nearly gasped in horror.
Oh no! Now I'm really in for it! I forgot to tell her the reason why I'm meeting her to begin with! Shirai-sensei will totally think that this is going to be a date!
Meanwhile Kenta Oyajima nearly spat his coffee out when he heard Aoki's request of Sae while Hoin Kyoko was suddenly glaring daggers at her older colleague not bothering to hide her jealousy.
Sae Shirai suddenly felt her face burning up as she realized what it was that Aoki was asking of her.
I-Is Aoki-sensei a-actually asking me out on a date? B-But I have never dated a man before!
It was true. Sae had never dated once in her entire life even now at the age of thirty. It had been a source of misery for her to know that she was somehow inadequate, unworthy of the attentions of a man. She did not possess an ample bosom like Hoin Kyoko nor was she outgoing or cheerful. She was old before her time, a spinster stuck in a young body that nobody wanted to be intimate with. She might as well grow the wrinkles and the white hair and get it over with.
Yet now here was a man that wanted her company! She was finally going to go out on a date. It didn't matter that Aoki was four years her junior. The fact was that he was a twenty-six year old male who thought her worthy of his attention. A male who chose HER over Hoin Kyoko, who was more in line of what men wanted nowadays.
Even so she was still somewhat suspicious. She wasn't sure if this was just some cruel prank that Aoki was trying to pull on her. So regaining her harsh countenance once more she soon replied.
"Are you propositioning me Aoki-sensei?"
Aoki's eyes widened when he heard this but he figured that now that the situation had turned to this that it was no use denying it even if it wasn't his original intention.
"I-If you mean that I'm asking you out on a date then yes. Will you go out on a date with me tomorrow? We can meet at the seafood restaurant downtown. I'll pay for both the food and drinks." offered Aoki nervously.
It was then that Sae lost control over her mask and let loose a blush. She averted her eyes from Aoki and suddenly felt butterflies in her stomach.
This is actually happening. A real man is asking me out on a date.
Aoki could see Sae blushing heavily and was afraid that he had embarrassed her. He had just asked her out on a date in front of two colleagues that highly respected her.
"I-I'm sorry Shirai-sensei it was rude of me asking such a bold request of you when we are not even on a first name basis and at work of all things. I guess that is me being unprofessional, as usual. Just forget that I-"
"Yes..."
Aoki stopped his rambling as he heard Sae respond to his request. Even so he could hardly believe what he heard.
"Y-You really want to go on a date with me tomorrow?" asked Aoki nervously.
"Yes...I would like to go on a d-d-date tomorrow if you don't mind having me." said Sae as she held her arms around her body and looked to the ground.
Aoki couldn't believe that he managed to get a date with Sae and on the first try too! His little blunder had turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
"W-Well great! Wonderful! How about we meet there at six tomorrow evening?" offered Aoki.
"S-Six sounds good. J-Just don't be late and keep me waiting." said Sae a bit harshly in the end in an attempt to regain control of herself.
"Okay then! Well I'll be leaving then. Good work all of you!" said Aoki as he rushed out of the staff room.
Sae smiled as she looked out the door from where Aoki had made his exit and never took her eyes off it.
Shirai Sae was waiting nervously outside of the restaurant constantly peeking at her watch and then scanning the crowd as she eagerly awaited Aoki to show up. She feared that he would stand her up and every passing minute only amplified on that fear despite the fact that it was still fifteen minutes until six.
Thankfully for her Aoki managed to arrive on time. As he looked her over he could hardly believe that the woman in front of him was the same, strict teacher that he worked with at school. She wore a red, one piece dress with matching heels and black panty hose. Her arms were bare save for her hair, let down, which contrasted beautifully with her fair complexion. She wore no make other than a light, pink lipstick.
Aoki couldn't help but stare causing Sae to blush and fidget.
H-He's been staring at me for a long time. I probably look ridiculous. This is the sort of clothing girls ten years my junior would be wearing, not a thirty year old hag like me.
Meanwhile Aoki had very different thoughts regarding his date.
So gorgeous. I can't believe this is the same Shirai-sensei that has struck fear and doubt into me for the past three years. Now I totally look under dressed.
Aoki looked down at himself and even though he was dressed sharply, a form fitting long sleeved navy button up shirt with khaki's and his new black shoes, he still couldn't help but feel that Sae was beyond his league at the moment.
"Y-You look amazing Shirai-sensei." stammered Aoki nervously.
The response was immediate as Sae felt terribly nervous and yet joyful at the same time.
He thinks I look amazing. This wasn't what I was expecting. I don't believe it. He's just saying that to make me feel better.
With that Sae regained control of her raging emotions and put on a stern face as she then replied to Aoki.
"Thank you for you for the compliment but we must get going. As it is you barely made here on time." said Sae in a somewhat condescending tone.
Aoki smiled nervously at the jab and opened the door to the restaurant allowing his date to enter first. It was a dimly lit restaurant that had blue incandescent lights hanging over each table. Both of them had secured a booth at the far corner of the restaurant and took their seat. As the waiter came to ask for their drinks Aoki had then asked for a bottle of wine. The waiter took their order and then left.
"I'm sorry Aoki-sensei but I don't drink." said Sae sternly.
"I understand Shirai-sensei but since we are on a date why not unwind a little bit?" suggested Aoki.
"Are you implying that I'm being too uptight?" replied Sae harshly.
The young man didn't know how to proceed from here. So far it seemed that Sae wasn't exactly happy to be with him at the moment. Even so he pushed ahead knowing that to falter now would only cause a disaster.
"You are being too uptight Shirai-sensei. We are not at work. If you do not wish to drink then I won't force you. But I will have my alcohol with or without your approval."
"Very well then Aoki-sensei. It is not often that I will concede to you but you are right. It's difficult for me to cut loose even on my days off. As a child I have been taught to not be complacent. Each minute not doing something productive is a minute wasted." said Sae.
"There is nothing wrong with that kind of thinking Shirai-sensei. It is because of your work ethic that you are a great teacher. Even so there is nothing wrong in taking some time in relaxing and treating yourself. I like to call it making an investment in yourself." said Aoki cheerfully.
"Really? Then I suppose you're do for retirement."
There was an awkward pause as Sae had said this to Aoki. The young man wasn't sure how to process what was said to him until it finally hit him.
Did she just make a wise crack at me?
It was then that he saw Sae start giggling softly to herself. If there had been any surprises before this one was the one that took the cake. He had never seen Sae smile or laugh like this before. She looked even prettier now that she was smiling.
"Aoki-sensei you should have seen your face when you realized what I just did. Truth be told I was afraid that it would go over your head. Thank you for proving me wrong." said Sae with mirthfully.
"I'm not sure whether I should be taking that as a compliment or not?" muttered Aoki though secretly he was happy that he was able to make her smile.
"Oh come now it is YOU that needs to lighten up!" replied Sae as she was finally recovering from the giggles.
It was then that the waiter came back with the wine in ice and produced two shot glasses. Neither Aoki nor Sae were ready to order so the waiter left them so that they could decide what they wanted to eat. In the meanwhile Aoki filled both his and Sae's shot glasses with wine.
Sae looked down at her glass of wine and seemed hesitant to touch it. She managed to gain the nerve to grasp the cup and held it tentatively to her lips. Then, closing her eyes, she gulped it down. Her face screwed up at the alcoholic taste and immediately drank some water to dilute it.
"Whoa there Shirai-sensei! There is no need to gulp it down at once. You're supposed to drink it in sips." said Aoki with an amused smile.
The older teacher wasn't pleased that she had made a fool out of herself and turned her frustration back at Aoki.
"And why didn't you think of telling me before I took this foul drink?"
"Think of it as a down payment towards yourself."
Sae gave Aoki an angry look as he started to laugh at her expense.
"Very funny Aoki-sensei." replied Sae sarcastically.
"What comes around, goes around. Besides you don't have to refer to me so formally. You're free to call me Aoki."
"I don't feel comfortable calling you by your first name alone. Do you mind Aoki-san?" asked Sae as she was recovering from the drinking debacle.
"That's fine if you don't mind me calling you Sae-san."
The older teacher blushed when she heard Aoki say her first name like that. True he was still using an honorific with her name but it was the first time anyone outside of her family had referred to her by her first name. It was strange and yet Sae felt like a burden was finally taken off her shoulders.
"V-Very well then." replied Sae with a blush.
Aoki noticed that Sae looked extremely shy when he had called her by her first name. It was peculiar and the young teacher wanted to follow up on it.
"Is this the first time that anyone has called you by your first name?" asked Aoki curiously.
Sae's eyes widened when she heard the question.
"T-That's none of your business Aoki-san." replied Sae as she continued to blush furiously.
"If it makes you feel better this is the first time a woman outside my family has called me by my first name. You shouldn't be ashamed." replied Aoki with a comforting voice.
Hearing this Sae felt a bit better. Taking her shot glass she poured some more wine and started to sip at it slowly. The strong, alcoholic taste was still there but now she could taste the sweet, fermented grape. It was quite good and she started to drink a little bit more. As she finished her second glass of wine she felt like her lips were tingling. When she turned her head it felt like it took a while for her vision to settle. More so when she moved her arm to fill her glass for the third time it felt like there was a delay between what her brain wanted her arm to do and the action itself. She wasn't afraid but thought it peculiar. She filled her cup and took another sip before speaking once more.
"I'm sorry Aoki-san. I know that you meant no harm with your question. If anything I should be flattered that a man would be so interested in me." said Sae sadly.
"Why do you say that Sae-san? I mean I have trouble believing that someone as gorgeous as yourself hasn't been on a first name basis with a man."
"Oh hush you. There is no need to flatter me with kind words."
"Who says I'm trying to flatter you Sae-san? I'm speaking what is true to me. You're gorgeous and you are an amazing teacher. It's astonishing that a man hasn't been interested in you. Then again I suppose that means I'm lucky. I'm your first and I'm honored that you are also the first woman to use my first name."
Sae blushed deeply when she heard Aoki's words.
He really does think I'm pretty.
"Thank you...Aoki-san. Nobody has ever said that to me before." whispered Sae.
"It's funny. When I had asked you to meet with me today I had done so because I had many questions regarding my observations in your class. Yet I was so nervous asking you that I neglected to mention why I met with you in the first place. Yet now I wouldn't want it any other way."
"You were nervous?" asked Sae in disbelief.
"Of course. I was so sure that you were going to completely reject me that I was already bracing myself for the worst."
"Do I really come across that intimidating at work?"
"I wouldn't call it intimidating. Sure I get nervous around you but that's because you have a powerful presence that demands respect and attention. When you speak we listen even if we do not agree and this carries over to your students as well. You are so dedicated to your job that now I feel stupid accusing you for not caring about your students." said Aoki.
"I-I'm happy then that you were able to muster the bravery in asking me out to a date even if it wasn't your original intention. Your words really do mean a lot to me Aoki-san. My parents were strict with me and expected only the best. I had no time to entertain thoughts about making friends or dating. My grades were the only things that mattered to me. As a consequence I had gotten the reputation of being an insufferable know-it-all. I had many acquaintances within the clubs and committees I served but no one I could truly call friend. Every Valentine's year I would never receive chocolate from the boys or even friendship chocolates from other girls."
"The more I was shunned the more I grew to resent my peers. I didn't need them or their pathetic affirmation. All their time being spent together having fun or being lovey-dovey toward each other was time not being productive. It was the only way that I could justify my misery. By claiming superiority by distancing myself from the activities that they shunned me from to begin with. Things did not get better in college and soon I found myself teaching at the age of twenty-three with neither a husband nor boyfriend."
"At first I hated the children I was teaching. They were loud, rowdy and unwilling to learn. Their grades suffered and more than once did administration come down on me for being such a terrible teacher. There were literally nights where I would go home and think that I was nothing more than a failure. What good was it for me to have stellar grades in high school and college if I was still terrible at my job? That the kids hated me, the administration was on the verge of firing me and, to top it all off, I was still single. Nothing was working out for me."
"Then I managed to connect with one of my children. He was the biggest trouble maker in my class and nothing I did could make him settle down. One day as I was grading their tests I saw that he managed to pass the test with a "C". This was monumental as he constantly failed his tests and homework. When I gave my children back their tests I made sure to congratulate him for doing such a good job and that I expected him to pass his tests from now on. It was then that I realized just how powerful positive reinforcement really was. With those words my biggest trouble maker soon became my favorite student. He did not always make the best grades but he always made sure to work hard and was proud to see when his results bore fruit and that he improved from the last test. I kept him busy and used his excess energy on small chores such as taking the trash out or taking some papers to the office. Little things that would distract him from the monotony of class and direct his energy towards something productive. Not only did that allow him time out of class but it also showed that I trusted him and he really appreciated it."
"I later found out that the boy had a poor living situation at home where he lived with a hard working but verbally abusive father. He always looked forward to coming to school because he wanted to be with me. I was his sanctuary...I was his beloved teacher...I was his mother. The night after my first class graduated I wept knowing that I that the boy I had grown to have a bond with would no longer be with me. He is now in now in the first year of high school and has visited me several times. He has become a fine young man and I'm proud to know that I had a major part in molding him to what he is now. But he was never my child and I can never claim him as such even though I loved him as my own."
Sae Shirai paused as she took yet another drink out of her wine glass. She had lost count as to how much she had drank but didn't care at the moment. She had never confided in anyone before and was happy to see that Aoki was paying her the utmost attention.
"It never gets easier Aoki-san. All of them come from different backgrounds and each have their own unique personalities. At nine years of age they are old enough to speak to and even have conversation with but are still yet young enough to be influenced by the adults in their lives. We, as teachers, assume a great burden. We spend more time with these children then their parents do with them. Year after year I'm expected to teach and care for the children in my class. I develop bonds with them and grow to care about each and every single one of them. Yet, at the end of the school year, I'm expected to let them go and forget about them so that I could make time for the next class. All that time spent bonding and caring for them...for nothing."
"I try to be aloof and standoffish with my children. I do not partake in skin ship nor do I feel the need to hand out needless praises. Yet no matter what the class they soon come to love me and I, in turn, succumb and grow to love them as my own. It's not fair. That I have come to know the love that a mother has for a child and yet I'm cursed in not having one of my own. I'm tired of being this...spinster that nobody loves. I...I want a child, a child of my very own that I do not have to give up after one year. A child that I can raise and claim for the rest of my life! That's all I have ever wanted! Yet here I am forced to stand idle as idiotic and abusive parents mistreat their children, MY CHILDREN, and not realize just how blessed they truly are."
"Aoki-san do you hear me? Do you understand what I'm trying to say? All I have ever wanted was to have a child of my own. A child born of my flesh, my womb and my blood. But now here I am, thirty years old and still I have nothing but the children in my class which will cruelly be yanked out of my care once they have completed the school year. It is at school that I'm at my happiest but also suffer the worst pain."
Once finished Sae looked down at her empty wine glass as her vision blurred from unshod tears. Aoki, meanwhile, was in complete disbelief over what he had heard. He never realized the depths of Sae's dedication to teaching. For him teaching was a means to an end. Sure he enjoyed spending time with the kids and such but, in the end, it was a way for him to pay his bills.
Sae, on the other hand, did not see teaching as a job but as a profession, even a duty. She did not outright show affection toward her students but he could tell that she cared for them, so much so that she considered herself to be their surrogate mother. In turn, from the limited observation of her class, he could see just how much her students respected and admired her.
They always paid attention in class and were always on their best behavior when she was present. When she did give out praise the children were highly receptive. As time passed Aoki realized the reason why Sae's praise was so highly regarded was because she made it a point to not needlessly praise her students. She molded her image of a strong, no nonsense teacher and the few times she did break this mold and smiled while giving praise was because it was earned. And all of her students worked the hardest to gain positive reinforcement from her.
Sae had turned the use of positive reinforcement into an art form. Her mastery was as such that no class was too rowdy or too loud. In the end she would always succeed in turning her students into role models for their peers. The biggest reason for her success was her dedication to teaching. Compared to her Aoki felt like a bumbling amateur.
Yet despite all her hard work she still wasn't able to obtain happiness for herself. She could bring smiles to all the children that came to her class and yet she was so powerless in bringing about her own happiness.
Aoki realized that he was at a crossroads and the next decision he made would have far reaching effects. The safest decision was to simply say a few kind words, eat their dinner and then hope everything went back to normal Monday morning. It would potentially save him a lot of grief and he would not be responsible for anyone's state of well-being. However Aoki felt that it was also the most cowardly decision he could make.
Here was Sae, a woman who seemed to always have everything in control, suddenly break down in tears before him as she spilled years of insecurities onto him. As a man he now felt obligated to help ease Sae's pain, to take a part of the burden and help her carry it. But how would he do that then?
Before he could think of an answer Sae stood up only to find herself losing her balance and sitting back down again. Aoki knew then that she had probably drank a bit too much and was not in any condition to eat. He called the waiter over, paid his bill, left a tab and then helped Sae out of her seat as they made their way outside the restaurant as he flagged down a taxi.
Sae did not protest from his assistance and instead remained pliant as he helped her walk toward his apartment room. There he sat her on the bed as he started to clean up a little. She then took the time to lay down and stare at the ceiling as she did so.
Aoki soon was able to finish cleaning up and set a small table in front of his bed and took a seat across from it so that he could speak to Sae face to face.
"You might be wondering why I brought you here. After you have finished speaking I realized that I needed to make a decision. The fact is that you trusted me enough to tell me about your insecurities. I know that it must have been very difficult for you to do so and for that I'm honored. With that being said I wanted to talk to you somewhere more private hence the reason why we are at my apartment."
"It must be really personal if you do not want anyone else but me to hear what you have to say." replied Sae seriously though she was still quite inebriated.
"Having observed you teaching and then listening to your story I cannot help but have the utmost respect and admiration for you Shirai Sae. The depths of your dedication to your profession has made me feel ashamed of myself as a teacher. I never realized how seriously you took your work or the care and love you had for your students. The fact that you consistently call them your children is testament to this fact."
"Seeing as my bravery has borne fruit before I feel the need to muster that courage once again in a decision I feel I must make. Over the past week I realized that my admiration started to become something more and after today I'm sure of what my feelings are. With that said I would like to ask if you consent in becoming my girlfriend. I want to try my hand in bringing you the happiness you deserve and if I'm not up to the job then hopefully you'll find someone who is. But only if you are willing to have me."
Even in her drunken stupor Sae didn't miss the significance of Aoki's question. Her heart began to race and her stomach felt like it was doing backflips.
I must be dreaming. Is Aoki-san asking me out?
Despite her excitement and her inebriated state Sae managed to regain some form of control over her body as she replied with an even, yet serious tone.
"Do you know what it is that you're asking of me? I have never dated a man before let alone become his girlfriend. You are basing your affections off of one week of being with me. More than that I am not the kind of woman that men are looking for. I'm not cutesy nor do I engage in silly, idiotic flirting and behavior. I'm used to spending large periods of my time alone and even if I were to consent to your request I will not willing relinquish that privacy. I am not needy and may not be available to you for company as women your age would be. Do you understand that by dating me all your expectations may come crashing down?"
It was then that Aoki had enough. He got up and walked over to Sae and placed his hand beneath her chin and forced her to look into his eyes. She blushed immediately from the contact and averted her gaze for a moment before meeting his eyes with hers.
"Why do you insist in beating yourself up like this Sae-san? I want to date you because I love you! This has become overwhelmingly clear! Nothing that you do will disappoint me. Believe me when I say this. You're the first woman I have ever had the courage in asking out. I may have only been able to interact with you personally for one week but I'm more than willing to find out more about you! I'm not saying that being in a relationship with each other is going to be easy or a solution to all our problems. But I'm willing to try and make you happy and fill the void in your heart because YOU DESERVE IT! The only question is if you truly believe you are worthy of happiness yourself."
Sae averted her eyes once more as she thought deeply about what Aoki had just said. In her inebriated state it was hard for her to sort the maelstrom of emotions she was feeling. The two most prevalent were fear and anticipation. She feared that if she did go out with Aoki then she would set both herself and him to failure. That all she would do was make his life miserable and, in turn, make herself even more miserable in knowing she was harming the person who genuinely cared for her.
Yet at the same time she could not help but look forward to the fact that perhaps she could finally fulfill that void of sorrow and loneliness. That by being in a relationship with Aoki could enrich her life in a way she never thought possible. Who knew? Perhaps if their affections were true then they could even get married and she could finally have the family she desperately has wanted for so long.
"A-Aoki-san. You really believe I'm worthy to be in a relationship with you?"
"Only if you feel that I'm worthy of you."
"Then I accept. I will no longer continue to deny myself this opportunity nor will I hinder your pursuit of happiness if you believe that I can help fulfill it."
"Sae-san..."
Aoki looked down to find Sae breathing heavily her face flushed and completely at his mercy. Her lips glistened and the urge to kiss her became overwhelming. Before Aoki could stop himself he bent down and kissed Shirai Sae deeply on the lips.
Sae eyes widened at the unexpected intrusion as she clutched at Aoki's shirt sleeves roughly as if making to push him off. However she found her resistance flagging as her symphatic system into overload and she started to feel the immense pleasure she was receiving from the kiss. She placed her hands behind his back as she drew him in closer to her.
They both fumbled a bit as they had not kissed anyone prior to themselves before but they were persistent and soon found a rythm. Aoki gently pressed his tongue at Sae's lips gently asking for admission. She parted her mouth slightly as Aoki gently bit her lower lip. Sae moaned softly in response giving Aoki the confidence he needed to then explore the entirety of Sae's mouth.
Her breath was hot and she tasted slightly of the wine she drank earlier. Eager for more Aoki pressed is tongue. Sae responded by meeting his tongue with her own as they started an erotic waltz with one another. Both worked in unison to bring about mutual pleasure. They soon parted as they each took their breath. Then Aoki became bold as he then found the crook of Sae's neck and gently suckled on it while passing one of his hand's through Sae's long hair and the other beginning to unzip the one piece that Sae had on.
Sae held Aoki close to her as she allowed him to lead her on. She felt his lips descending from the crook of her neck down to her clavicle before settling at her now exposed breasts. Seeing her state of undress she gently placed her arms over them.
"Why do you hide yourself from me?" asked Aoki.
"T-They're small." replied Sae insecurely.
Aoki responded by gently prying her arms apart so that he could take in her breasts in their entirety. Truth be told they were much larger than he expected. They probably only looked small because Sae normally wore a loose fitting button up when she worked. Here he saw that she was a healthy C-cup with small, pink teats that started to harden from his gaze. He placed his hand underneath her right breast causing Sae to whimper. They fit perfectly.
"There is nothing to be ashamed of Sae-san. Your breasts are perfect."
"Y-You're just saying that to make me feel better. They're nothing compared to Hoin-sensei."
"You can't compare yourself to her. Sure she may have larger breasts but I think you're far more gorgeous than she is. Besides your breasts are perfectly proportioned with your body. I bet you haven't even noticed that you actually possess an hour glass figure."
"I never thought to notice that..."
"Sae-san. You really are too hard on yourself. You're a beautiful woman. Why do you have such a hard time seeing that?"
"Nobody has ever told me before."
"Well now I'm telling you and it's true whether you chose to believe it or not."
With that Aoki bent down and started to gently suckle on Sae's right breast while massaging the left one with his other hand. Sae flinched from the contact as she was sensitive there, as were all women, but soon relaxed as she let the pleasure run it course.
From this point on Aoki soon started to descend until he reached Sae's black panties. He started to slip them off slowly his heart racing as he did so. This would be the first time he would see a woman's intimacy in real life and when spied the first signs of Sae's pubic hair his heart nearly stopped. And if he was feeling nervous then Sae was nearly panicking.
She had never thought of revealing this much of herself to anyone before and now that she realized that her privates were going to be seen by a man she then clamped her legs shut. Even so Aoki wasn't deterred as he managed to slip her underwear off and gently pried Sae's legs apart where he could see her in her entirety.
Her intimacy was glistening the arousal evident. Her pubis was covered in fine, black hair which was a bit unkempt but not unsightly. He had seen porn stars in magazines and videos give oral to a woman and felt that it was his obligation to do the same for Sae. Yet as he neared her intimacy he realized that this was going to be harder than he thought.
The smell of her arousal was heady, almost vulgar mixed alongside that which was vainly briny. Aoki had to take a moment to compose himself but he knew that he couldn't wait too long. He was sure that Sae was completely embarrassed in revealing her privates to him in such a manner so he soon buckled up and took the plunge.
The moment his lips made contact with her labia Sae immediately arched her back and let out a gasp. Sae was no stranger to masturbation. Even she was prone to succumbing to primal urges but nothing she had done on her own compared to the pleasure she felt from having someone else service her. She could tell that Aoki was a bit confused as to what to do and was experimenting and she encouraged him by gently placing her hand on his head and guiding him where she felt the most pleasure.
Aoki realized that Sae reacted the most sharply when he made contact with her clitoris. Taking her cue he then bit down gently. Sae gasped loudly as she clutched at his hair but he knew that she wasn't in pain. It was that she was not expecting the overwhelming sympathetic response. He knew that women were also pleasured by having their G-Spot stimulated. However that meant that he would have to enter her.
Taking his pants down he revealed his engorged penis. It wasn't the most impressive specimen at being an average five and a half inches but to Sae she eyed it with mild concern.
W-Will that really go inside me?
Aoki positioned himself at Sae's entrance and then gently pushed himself in. When he was about two thirds of the way in he suddenly felt something blocking his way and Sae immediately closed her legs.
"Am I hurting you?" asked Aoki.
"N-No I'm fine. It's just...so much to take in." replied Sae with a flushed face.
The young teacher knew that he had reached Sae's hymen, the sign of her purity. He knew that his next decision would change his relationship with Sae permanently from here on out.
"If you do not want this then we will stop Sae."
Sae Shirai noticed that Aoki had neglected to use an honorific on her name but she didn't care at that point. What she did care about was the fact that she was going to be intimate with a man that clearly loved, admired and cared for her. She knew that by giving him her purity that they could never go back to the way they were before.
"I want this. Even if we do not become something more at least I would have given my purity to the man that was first willing to fulfill my happiness. You're more than deserving of this Aoki. Go ahead. I know this will hurt but it is something I know I can bear."
"Very well Sae."
With that Aoki then thrust forward swiftly breaking the hymen as the tip of his penis touched Sae's cervix. Sae gripped Aoki's back tightly as he broke her barrier. She could feel the blood passing from her broken purity and teared up a bit. She knew that her life had taken an irrevocable course now. No matter what she did she could never reclaim her purity again.
In a way it was like a chapter of her life had finally closed and now she was free to continue onto the next step of her life. Even so it was difficult to accept.
Aoki, meanwhile, was feeling very similar as well. He had never been intimate with a woman before and now that he had he realized just how huge this commitment was now. This woman was willing to bare herself entirely because she trusted him, was willing to let him fulfill the void in her heart and attain happiness. For the three years that he had worked with Shirai Sae she had always managed to maintain a sense of control over him. This came from either her seniority, her ability to come into his class and bring about instant order or her irrefutable criticisms towards him.
Now Aoki realized that he was the one in control. If he chose he could break Shirai Sae into a million pieces. He could lay with her and then forget everything he said. Make her purity worth nothing more than a good time. With a few harsh words he could destroy her self-esteem to the point where it would become irreparable. Her heart and her life literally were in his hands.
Yet he also knew that he could use this experience to enrich Sae's life in a way she never thought possible. Was he sure that he could do this? No but that wouldn't stop him from trying. She trusted him to help her realize and obtain happiness and paid for it with her very own purity. Aoki couldn't help but think back when he said that Sae should invest more of herself. Now it seemed that she was putting everything on the line. Aoki knew that nothing less than one hundred percent of his effort would work in this relationship. It scared him to know this but, at the same time, his male pride demanded that he not fail.
With that Aoki started to slowly pull out and then thrust himself back onto Sae. She had become accustomed to his size though she still winced with each thrust. The pain soon subsided as Sae started to moan softly from the pleasure she felt.
Meanwhile Aoki was struggling to find Sae's G-Spot. While he was feeling immense pleasure himself he knew that Sae was not receiving the same amount in kind. Aoki shifted around as he felt the small grooves within Sae's intimacy hoping to find the mass of nerves that would drive Sae over the edge. As he passed through one of these grooves he heard Sae gasp sharply. Testing his discovery he hit that same spot again only this time Sae actually squeaked from the stimulation.
He had found her G-Spot.
With this knowledge Aoki soon started again with slow and deliberate thrusts that would maximize the amount of time that Sae would feel pleasure. With each, deep thrust he felt Sae scratch his naked back moaning audibly every time he hit her G-Spot. To be honest he never thought he would ever hear Sae in such an erotic state but found the sounds of her gasps and moans to be stimulating. It only urged him more to continue thrusting at that same spot so that he could hear her once more.
It was then that Aoki realized that he was close to his climax.
Truthfully he was surprised that he had not climaxed straight away but now he felt his self-control beginning to slip. He didn't want to climax before Sae but he wasn't sure how to bring her own climax on.
He suddenly remembered the response he got from her when he stimulated her clitoris. He wondered if stimulating both her clitoris and her G-spot would cause her to climax. There was only one way to find out.
With that he started to thrust faster and harder causing Sae gasp repeatedly with each thrust. As he was feeling his climax coming he pinched the bundle of nerves that crowned Sae's intimacy.
What Aoki didn't expect was that Sae actually screamed as she felt her climax come hard. Aoki withdrew himself as he saw Sae's intimacy literally gush forth her arousal. The sight of her climax caused Aoki to go over the edge as his white, hot seed spilled on Sae's stomach. With that Aoki soon collapsed next to Sae who was breathing hard.
"W-Wow...intense." said Sae in between her deep breaths.
"I second that." replied Aoki tiredly.
For a moment both were silent as they came to terms with what has happened. Both were in disbelief that they had actually done it and yet here they were, naked as the day they were born, panting in exhaustion from their intimate love making.
Soon Aoki turned around and could see Sae, who was coming into an afterglow, and couldn't believe that someone so gorgeous was willing to be so intimate with him. He realized, at that moment, that his decision was the right one and that he would do everything in his power to make this amazing woman happy.
He then wrapped an arm about her supple waist and drew her close to him. She curled up and snuggled next to him. Already they could feel their eyelids beginning to grow heavy.
"So what now Aoki? Do you truly commit to one another in an intimate relationship or was this a one-time thing? Something which we did to fulfill our mutual desires?"
"Today is the most important day of my life Sae. It is the day that I finally found the woman I love. I will never let you go."
Sae blushed deeply when she heard his words and then felt an overwhelming sense of relief. A pessimistic voice had started to chime when they had finished their love making, constantly telling her that Aoki was only using her and that once she had given herself to him then he would forget her. She had every reason to worry what not with 'players' who thought of women as mere sex toys.
But she knew that Aoki meant every word he said. And while it took her a very long time to finally lose her virginity she couldn't help but think she had found the right person to give it to.
"Do you know how happy that makes me Aoki? That right now I'm quite possibly the happiest I have ever been in my life? Do you promise to help me realize this happiness even if I act rude or condescending? That perhaps one day we will have a child of our own with whom we could cherish?"
It was then that Aoki turned Sae over so that they were seeing each eye to eye. He gave her a chaste kiss to her forehead and drew her in so that her head was resting on his chest.
"I promise."
Shirai Sae gave a small, contented smile before feeling her eyelids begin to droop. The sound of Aoki's beating heart was like a lullaby and last thing she felt before falling asleep was Aoki stroking her hair softly.
Author's Note: Well a smutty lemon involving the hottest teacher in Kodomo no Jikan. Seriously Hoin totally overrated lol. Anyway I know the characters got quite a bit OOC towards the end though hopefully it wasn't too bad. I haven't read the manga so if some of the stuff doesn't comply then I apologize in advance. Anyway let me know what you all think and thanks for reading!