Disclaimer: Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Paramount and TPTB. The plot is the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warning: Rated PG for some mild language.
Comments: In this part of my world, C/7 never happened, Joe Carey didn't die, Neelix didn't leave the ship, and B'Elanna isn't pregnant yet. A huge THANK YOU to Moof for being a wonderful Beta.
Italics indicates thoughts or flashbacks
And the Coffee Will Set You Free
'Coffee is really going to be my undoing one of these days,' Kathryn thought to herself as she tried to find a more comfortable sitting position. She had a throbbing headache, and all the muscles in her back were aching from the pounding she'd taken. She wondered vaguely how many times this could happen to one person. How many times on the way home could she regain consciousness in an alien prison cell on some previously unknown planet hoping Voyager would rescue her? She knew one thing. It happened all too often.
The circumstances leading up to these situations always seemed to start out the same way. Voyager would be running low on supplies. So, they would seek out a planet where they could make a trade agreement. The aliens they met would seem peaceful and the planet would appear harmless. These factors combined would encourage Janeway's senior officers to suggest that she take shore leave. Then at some point after she left the ship, everything would go to hell in a hand basket. 'At least this time I managed to get a good cup of coffee.'
The Day Before
"Welcome aboard Voyager gentlemen," Janeway said as she and Chakotay greeted the new arrivals in the transporter room.
"Captain Janeway, it's nice to meet you in person," The Hekorian representative said stepping off the platform. "A viewscreen does not do you or your ship justice."
Janeway smiled slightly at the obvious flattery and gestured towards the doors, 'I should be the one doing the flattering. My ship needs the supplies you have to offer not the other way around.'
She voiced none of these thoughts, however, and instead she said, "Minister, our Mr. Neelix has prepared a dinner for us in the mess hall."
"We are delighted to join you, Captain. Please, call me Jakal," The leader of the group said following Janeway out the door and into the corridor.
"If you enjoy leola root as much as you say," Chakotay spoke up unable to hide the bewilderment in his voice as they entered the turbolift. "I'm sure you'll find the evening's fare most agreeable."
Janeway ducked her head to hide the smile on her face at her first officer's comment. Minister Jakal missed the small exchange between the command team and commented, "Your tale is remarkable, Captain, but are you certain you want to trade your stores of leola root for the simple foodstuffs we have to offer?"
"Yes." The command team responded simultaneously.
While the guests thoroughly enjoyed the leola root lasagna, the command team merely pushed their dinner around their plates and made polite conversation. Captain Janeway brightened considerably when Neelix brought the after dinner coffee. 'Now this is the part of dinner I can enjoy.'
Minister Jakal watched as the human woman wrapped her hands around the mug and inhaled the steaming aroma emanating from it. He was intrigued. She hadn't even taken a sip of the drink and yet he could tell it seemed to have a soothing effect on her. He simply had to ask, "What is that you're drinking?"
Janeway looked up and smiled, "We call it coffee. It's a hot drink traditionally made from roasted beans. It's delicious."
Janeway paused when Chakotay began coughing.
"Sorry Captain," He grinned from behind his napkin. "I just needed to clear my throat. Please continue."
She raised an eyebrow in his direction before turning back to Jakal, "Coffee is an acquired taste. The drink also has a natural energy stimulant in it that some people find useful. Would you care to try some?"
Jakal accepted a mug from Neelix and tried it. Janeway waited for a grimace but the Minister just licked his lips, "This tastes very similar to our Kuava."
"Kuava?" Chakotay asked with trepidation sensing Kathryn's growing interest. 'If she has to fly Voyager into another nebula in order to find this Kuava plant, we're in trouble.'
"Yes, it's a plant we harvest in the fall and use to make a beverage quite like this one," Jakal answered. He took another sip. "We generally serve it at ambient temperature and ours isn't a bean, but a leafy plant."
"If it passes inspection by our doctor," Janeway leaned forward, "Would it be possible to include some in our requested items?"
"Of course. You've come at the perfect time for it. The harvest festival is taking place tomorrow." He slapped the table excitedly. "The Kuava Festival. I had forgotten all about it in the excitement of your arrival. You should join me, Captain."
"You have a Kuava festival?" Janeway asked ignoring Chakotay's snicker at the eagerness in her voice.
"We celebrate many festivals across the planet throughout the year. Tomorrow, one of our larger cities will be celebrating its recent Kuava crop harvesting. The plants are used to make all sorts of food and drinks," Jakal beamed as he turned to face Janeway. "A few other government officials and I will have a booth at the festival so that we may preside over the festivities. A space faring dignitary such as yourself would be most welcome to join us."
"Captain, I think it's a great idea," Chakotay spoke up. "You could use some time off the ship. I'll oversee the loading of supplies while you're planetside."
"Oh, I don't think I can," Janeway protested weakly.
"As one of the people presiding over the festival, you would be able to sample the finest of all the different Kuava delicacies," Jakal entreated.
"Captain, except for the Doctor's disapproval of the caffeine you will undoubtedly ingest, there is no reason you shouldn't take advantage of this opportunity," Chakotay responded. "Reports will be here when you get back, and with the caffeine racing through your veins I'm sure you will be able to complete them in half the time."
"Please, Captain Janeway, it would be an honor to have you join us," The Minister implored. "It will be only a few hours away from your ship, and perhaps you will find a product there that you wish to bring home with you."
Janeway nodded and smiled convinced. "Well, it seems I might be overdue for some shore leave afterall."
Kathryn Janeway was indeed enjoying the festival. She had left the government's booth earlier to walk amongst the different vendor stalls of the festival, but she returned to begin her third round of sampling. As far as she was concerned this Kuava was the most similar substance next to coffee that she had found in the entire quadrant, and from the way her blood was singing it must have about the same amount of caffeine equivalent. The variety in which the locals used the leaf rivaled any coffee shop in San Francisco. She had tried the drink version in more than one variety as well as chewing on a leaf of the plant that had been dipped into the local equivalent of chocolate. 'Neelix would have a conniption if I trade away all of his leola root, but on the other hand the rest of the crew would be ecstatic.'
She walked to the back of the booth and was perusing the table that had been so extravagantly laid out when the proverbial shit hit the fan. Janeway was eyeing what looked like coffee custard and possibly a version of ice cream when the explosion happened. Minister Jakal and the other government officials were all sitting at the front of the booth when it disintegrated in a plume of smoke and ash. A shockwave from the blast lifted Janeway off her feet and threw her over the table. She slammed into the back wall of the booth and fell to the floor. The remnants of the booth crashed down around her. Kathryn's sight focused briefly on a single kuava leaf floating through the air before tunneling her into darkness.
The first thing she felt upon waking was a throbbing headache. She opened her eyes hoping, for once, to see the bright lights of sickbay. She was disappointed when she found herself in an unfamiliar room that was dimly lit and furnished even less. She began to sit up, but quickly felt all the muscles in her back protest the motion. She moved again albeit more slowly this time and managed to sit all the way up. It didn't feel like anything was broken but her muscles ached and felt tight. 'Being at the scene of explosions is really starting to get old.'
The Present
Janeway shifted her position on the small bench and rested her head against the wall. It was cool to the touch and helped soothe the throbbing muscles of her back. She didn't have to wait long before she heard footsteps coming down the hall. The door opened and two Hekorians stood in the doorway. Kathryn was relieved to find that she was still on the same planet.
"Get on your feet," One of the men barked at her. Their tone made her feel wary.
"I'm Captain Kathryn Janeway of the starship Voyager," She began. "I'd like to know what happened."
"Quiet. We do not need to know who you are. We have been ordered to bring you to the Dais for questioning," The guard grabbed her arm and pulled Janeway to her feet. "You will get a chance for your say there."
Janeway felt the room spin and attempted to push the dizziness to the back of her mind, 'It really won't make a good impression if I fall over on him.' She put on her best command face and spoke in a voice that was firmer than she actually felt, "Then by all means, take me to this Dais."
The Dais was a considerable distance from the cell where she had woken. She had boarded two different shuttles flanked by the guards at all times. She took the time during the shuttle rides to sit down and build up her strength. She was also trying to remember everything she could about her situation. Kuava. Coffee. If only she could get some of that caffeine now. Maybe it would help her headache. The shuttle came to a stop and Janeway got to her feet without help. What had become of Jakal? Why was she being treated this way? She hoped this Dais would give her some sorely needed answers.
As Janeway stepped into the room, she saw three older Hekorians positioned behind what appeared to be a judge's podium. She began to step forward but was held back by one of her guards. Someone up front began an announcement, "The Magistrates of Plythe Province of the greater realm of Hekoria will now hear the truth. The matter before the Dais is the attack on Minister Jakal that resulted in his death."
At the news of Jakal's death, Janeway briefly closed her eyes in remembrance. She missed the brief nod one of the Hekorians behind the Dais gave to the guard beside her. Janeway's eyes snapped open when she felt a sting on the back of her neck. She whirled in time to see the guard remove something that looked similar to a hypospray.
"What did you do?" She was furious and immediately put a hand to the spot on her neck. Before she could demand anything further, the room began to spin and she felt her knees buckle. The guard was prepared for her body's reaction and caught her keeping her on her feet. He moved her in front of the judge's bench and released her. Without the guard's support, Janeway fell to her knees and elbows. 'Not exactly the position of strength I would have preferred to take, but at least I'm still conscious.'
It only took a moment before she could feel her head clearing and she was able to sit back on her heels. Furious was an understatement for how she felt at that moment, "What did you do to me? Why am I being treated like this? I have an agreement with your government."
The Hekorian seated behind the dais in the middle spoke, "What is your name?"
"I'm Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Starship Voyager. What is this all about?" She answered bringing herself slowly back to a standing position. She gave the guard that had deposited her the full death glare.
"What were you doing in the government booth at the festivities?" The oldest Hekorian asked.
"I was sampling the local kuava products," Janeway replied. "Now are you going to tell me…"
"Why was the government attacked today?" The Hekorian to the right cut her off. "Did you target Minister Jakal specifically?"
"I have no idea why your officials were attacked today. I didn't target anyone," Janeway answered.
"What was your relationship to the Minister?"
"Political only," Janeway replied tightly not liking the implication of the question.
"Why did he invite you to the festival?"
"He invited me to attend the festivities when he found out I liked coffee," She answered. "I think I've answered enough questions and now I have some of my own."
"Did you know about the attack before it happened?" The Hekorian to the right badgered her.
"No, I had no prior knowledge."
"What was used in the explosive?"
"I have no idea," Janeway said. "Now, I refuse to answer any more questions…"
"How many people were involved with this act?"
"I don't know," Janeway answered before she could stop herself.
"What group claims committing this act?"
"I don't know," Janeway blurted out. 'What is wrong with me?'
"What did your group hope to accomplish?"
"My group is only trying to get home," Janeway answered. She had a dawning suspicion what had been in that hypospray. "What exactly did you administer to me?"
The interrogation continued ignoring her questions, "How would your group get home by attacking our government?"
"It wouldn't," She said exasperated.
"Then why did you attack us?"
Janeway was able to hesitate this time before answering their question. She tried to shake off the need to answer them, but she was only able to delay her response. "We didn't attack you. How many times do I have to tell you?"
Behind the dais, the Hekorians began to converse amongst themselves. "The effects of the serum are beginning to wear off. Her species must be more resistant to it."
"If it worked at all," The middle one scoffed. "She didn't tell us anything about the attack."
"Maybe she doesn't know anything." The oldest one considered. "She did answer our questions."
"Gentlemen," Janeway began trying desperately to sound civil. She'd been ignored long enough. "Please contact your world government; they know who I am and what I'm doing here. I've been telling you the truth which, quite frankly, I don't think you gave me a choice about."
They officials barely glanced in her direction, but the two guards moved in close to flank her sides again. She had the distinct knowledge that they were prepared to restrain her if necessary.
"If the serum did not produce results; we should move to immersion," The middle one suggested to his partners.
"With the resistance she showed to the serum. The immersion would have to be complete in order to expect results," The Hekorian on the right surmised. "Since it will require a full session, we should get started right away."
The middle one nodded and then finally gave Janeway his attention. "It has been decided that you will undergo truth immersion in order to determine your accountability in this heinous act."
"Now wait a minute," Janeway began, but the guards had already taken her by the arms. "I demand to speak to your government. Contact my ship. Let them know I'm here."
The Hekorians behind the dais left the room without acknowledging her.
Janeway considered resisting her guards, but since there were now four of them she felt it would be futile. She didn't know what this truth immersion was going to entail, but she felt sure that saving her strength for it was the wiser choice of action. The serum they had shot her with earlier had compelled her to answer any question that was asked of her. This truth immersion was supposed to produce even stronger effects. 'What more will they ask me, and will they accept the answers I give them.'
The guards brought her to a room three doors to the left of the dais. She was handed a jumpsuit of sorts and told to change into it. She balked at first, but the guards made it obvious she would wear it one way or another. She stepped behind the provided screen and changed. She didn't like being out of her uniform. It was never a good sign in a predicament such as she found herself.
Janeway stepped out from behind the screen unhappy with the little modesty afforded her by the jumpsuit. She could see the back wall of the room had been retracted while she changed. What she saw made her heart go into her throat. At the back of the room, there was an octagonal chamber filled with a bluish liquid. It stood at least four meters tall, and had stairs leading to the top of the chamber. The guards began to prod her to climb the stairs, and she understood that when they said immersion they meant it literally.
As a rule, Starfleet Captains did not panic, but she simply could not let herself be herded into that chamber without a fight. She moved quickly against the guards, and managed to break away from their loose grasp. She lashed out and managed to fell two of her guards, before a third managed to get his arms around her. A fourth guard stepped forward avoiding her kicks, and she felt another sting against her neck. Almost immediately she felt her muscles go limp. She slumped in the guard's arms seething that her body would not respond to her mind's commands.
The guards brought her flaccid form to the top of the tank. Another Hekorian fitted a breathing mask over her mouth and nose, and she was lowered into the blue liquid. As the top of the tank was sealed, Janeway dug deep into her Starfleet training, 'I don't think they ever envisioned this scenario at Starfleet Academy.'
After some time had passed, Janeway could begin to move her arms and legs again. She was still encased in the alien fish tank with no where to go, but she relished the return of control of her muscles. She could discern no ill effects from the bluish substance other than the wrinkling of her skin. The liquid did not seem to bother her eyesight and she could hear the occasional noise. She was thankful she didn't have complete sensory deprivation.
She had no idea how long she had been in the tank, or how long they would keep her there. The rotation of the guard shift was the only time reference she had and they had already changed over twice. She had grown tired of watching them watching her during the first shift. 'After this experience, I can certainly relate to the fish in Picard's ready room.'
She could see the cold water creeping into the shuttle. She could see Justin, slumped over unconscious, still strapped into the pilot's chair. Her father was hanging loosely in the straps of his chair. The water was continuing to climb up towards her. It passed over Justin's waist. She fumbled with the harness holding her in place. She realized the water wasn't climbing, the shuttle was sinking. The water crept over Justin's head and his body convulsed once before going still again as he breathed in the water. The water covered the lower half of her father's body now. The cold wet tendrils of liquid reached her feet and begin climbing up her legs. The water was freezing. She punched buttons on the console she could reach, but nothing seemed to be working. The water passed over her father's head and snaked halfway up her body. She sucked in a quick breath feeling the cold like a thousand needles pricking her skin. As the water insinuated itself up the length of her neck she raised her chin in a futile effort to avoid the inevitable. It was only then she was able to see out of the window of the shuttle. She could see herself standing outside in the ice and snow. The freezing water went over her head, but her eyes remained open. She watched helplessly as the image of herself outside in the snow stamped her foot on the icy shelf.
Janeway wrenched open her eyes and momentarily flailed at the bluish liquid in which she was still immersed before remembering where she was. She wanted to gasp for air and she had to fight an impulse to rip the breathing mask off her face. It took a tremendous mental effort to push the memory of Justin and her father to the back of her mind. Her surroundings were making it more difficult than usual to banish the memory. She closed her eyes so she could try and focus on anything besides the liquid in which she was immersed.
She almost had her heart rate under control again when she heard the guards talking to someone outside in the hall. Her eyes snapped open when she heard Chakotay's voice, "Torres, get her out of there. NOW!"
Torres and a team of engineers and security personnel moved past the surprised Hekorian guards and into Janeway's visual range. Torres strode up the ladder and had her Captain out of the tank within moments, "Captain, are you alright?"
"Not really, I just had a very vivid nightmare about the death of Justin and my father." Janeway's voice trailed off. 'That was not what I had intended to say. Judging by the surprised look on B'Elanna's face, that wasn't the answer she had been expecting to hear.'
"Captain?" Torres asked worriedly. She whipped out a medical tricorder and began scanning the Captain.
"Please Lt, don't ask me any questions," Janeway said as she made her way to the screen where she had left her uniform. "I heard the Commander, where did he go?"
"He went to speak with some officials about how you've been treated," B'Elanna answered standing just beyond the screen. "I think it's just down the hall."
"That's exactly where I want to be," Janeway said coming out from behind the screen. She had her uniform on again and had pushed her wet hair out of her face. 'I'm due some answers.'
Chakotay relaxed as Captain Janeway strode into the room. Her uniform was sporting large damp spots, but he had to suppress a grin. 'At least that death glare isn't focused on me.'
The three Hekorians he had been speaking to concerning recent events literally took a step back and clustered closer together as Kathryn approached. They immediately began making excuses to the Captain.
"We meant you no harm, Captain. We are only the local municipality and we were simply trying to investigate the death of our government officials," The middle Hekorian spoke. "We were unaware of your dignitary status. Will you forgive us of our assumptions concerning you?"
"Not anytime soon," Janeway immediately answered. 'Damn.'
Chakotay's head snapped up as Torres shifted her weight behind the Captain 'That certainly sounded more like a response B'Elanna would give, not Kathryn.'
Janeway had fury behind her eyes, but she pinched the bridge of her nose betraying her discomfort at her response. She forced herself to speak in a calm tone, "I'm sure you understand better than I do why I just said that."
All three of the officials nodded, but only the oldest managed to respond to her statement. "Again we apologize, but in our efforts to uncover the facts about what happened we submitted you to truth immersion."
"And just what does that entail?" Chakotay demanded. 'What had Kathryn been subjected to? They had assured me it had been nothing invasive or painful.'
"It means," Janeway surmised. "They dunked me in a booth full of liquid that forces me to tell the truth when asked a question."
"Well, yes," The official said meekly. "The effects of the immersion are longer lasting than the serum, but it is still only a temporary condition."
"How much longer lasting?" Janeway growled.
"The rest of today," The official began and Janeway relaxed slightly. Then he continued, "Plus two more."
"What?!" Janeway exploded.
"That's generally how long our trials last," The old Hekorian hurried to explain. "It is beneficial for our participants to speak the truth for the entirety of the trial."
"Welcome back, Captain," Ensign Campbell said as the command team rematerialized in the transporter room. "How was…"
"Don't!" Janeway immediately put her hand up to stop the obvious question. Luckily Chakotay intervened.
"The planetside was refreshing Ensign, thank you," Chakotay answered smiling as Janeway made a quick exit. He had to hustle to catch up with her as she was already half way down the corridor. "We didn't tell the crew anything yet. Only the senior officers know that it wasn't your choice you were taking extended time on the planet."
Janeway nodded, "I just didn't want to give the Ensign an earful about what her Captain really thinks of the planet."
Janeway and Chakotay entered sickbay and the Doctor greeted them with tricorder in hand, "Welcome back Captain. How are you feeling?"
"I have a throbbing headache, every muscle in my back hurts, and I'm slightly nauseous."
The Doctor raised an eyebrow at her candid response. "Well, that's enlightening."
"Doctor," Janeway began with her most menacing death glare aimed at him. "You should conduct this exam with as few questions as possible."
"Hmmm, well a medical exam can hardly be conducted without some questions."
"Keep them brief," Janeway said as she laid down hesitantly on the biobed.
The Doctor did not want to lose this opportunity to get some truthful answers from his most difficult patient, but he also didn't want to be deactivated either. "You do have a concussion, which I would assume is from the explosion the Commander mentioned. Did you have any injuries prior to the explosion for which you didn't seek treatment?"
"Yes."
"And what were they?" he asked quickly before she could stop him.
"A sprained wrist and a bruised hip," Janeway glared and began to rise to a sitting position. "Doctor."
"I am simply trying to determine which injuries are new and which are specifically related to your recent trip," He said pushing her back down. "How did you accrue these previous injuries?"
"Playing hoverball with Tom," Janeway sat up. "Doctor, finish this exam without questions or I will delete your program."
"Would you really?"
"No," she growled.
Chakotay cleared his throat earning glares from both the Doctor and the Captain, "Doctor, have you found out anything about the sample of serum that B'Elanna sent you?"
"Not yet. I have it analyzing now," He administered a hypospray to the Captain. "That should help with your headache and sore muscles. There will be no permanent damage from any of your injuries, but you should still take it easy for the next two days. As for your nausea, when was the last time you ate?"
"The dinner before this mission started," Janeway answered.
"Well then, I suggest you stop by the mess hall on the way to your quarters. If you will stop by in the morning I should have some preliminary results for you regarding the serum," The Doctor continued and put some space between himself and the captain. He wanted to get one more question in before she left. "Do you…"
"Doctor, so help me if you ask me one more question. I will not delete your program, but I will ensure that you clean the outside hull of this ship from stem to stern with a toothbrush!"
The Doctor swallowed his question, "Very well. Have a good evening, Captain."
Chakotay waited until they were alone on the turbolift and decided to dare the devil, "So, who won the hoverball game?"
"Paris."
Kathryn refused to go to the mess hall insisting that Chakotay bring her up to speed on ship's business. They reached her quarters, and he smiled mischievously at her.
"What?" Janeway asked him. "And don't you dare ask me a question."
"I'll try not to, but I think it best if we sit down and have dinner while we talk."
"I am not remotely hungry right now," She said. "I'm too keyed up."
"Kathryn, do you really want to face the Doctor tomorrow and have him ask if you followed his directions?" Chakotay grimaced as she answered his question quite colorfully. "Damn, sorry about that. I didn't mean to phrase it as a question."
"I know," She sighed. "Fine, you replicate something while I sonic off the last of that goo."
Throughout dinner Chakotay thought of a million questions he would love to ask, but he discarded them. It just wouldn't be fair. He looked up when Kathryn sighed. She was looking right at him.
"Go ahead and ask, Chakotay."
"I'm sorry?" He tried to say innocently.
"I've been watching you for the past twenty minutes. You haven't said a word throughout dinner because you don't want to ask me a question, and yet that's all that's going through your mind," She said as she rose to recycle the dinner plates. "So go ahead and ask me what's on your mind."
"It just doesn't seem fair."
"It's not. However, I don't promise that you'll like the answers you receive so maybe it is fair after all," She sat on the couch with her after dinner coffee. She smiled at the drink before sipping it. 'Coffee was how this whole thing got started.'
"Kathryn, you just smiled at your coffee," He said joining her on the couch.
"That wasn't a question," She gave him a half smile.
He took a deep breath, "Are you alright?"
"No," She answered. As he started to speak again she interrupted, "Let me clarify. Physically, I'm tired and sore, but I will be fine. Mentally, I feel exposed. I've lost a little piece of control and I don't like it."
"No one ever likes to lose control, least of all Kathryn Janeway," He said giving her the half dimple smile.
"You're going to have to take over the bridge for the next few days," She said changing the subject.
"That's really not necessary unless you feel you need the time off."
"That's not it Chakotay. What do you think will happen if we get attacked in the next two days? Paris will ask me what I want to do, and I'll give him the truthful answer."
He asked, "What would you tell him?"
"I'd tell him to destroy whoever had attacked us," She sighed. "Or maybe it would be a really bad attack, and I'd tell him I want to go hide under the desk in my ready room."
"You would never want to hide when your ship was being attacked. No matter how bad the odds," He said confidently. When she opened her mouth to protest, he asked, "Would you ever hide from an enemy?"
"No," She slapped his leg. "That wasn't fair. But that's not really the point. What if we come across some absolutely incredible situation for which there is no answer? What then?"
"I'm not sure I'm following you," He told her.
"The Captain always knows what to do. I give orders and people take comfort that although they aren't sure, the Captain has a good grasp on things. But Chakotay," She looked away from him, "What if they ask me what to do next, and the only truthful answer I can give them is that I have no idea what to do. In this quadrant, I have to make this stuff up as we go along. You've been a captain before, you know that sometimes the truthful answer is that you have no idea what to do next. The crew doesn't need to know that."
"Alright," he conceded. "I'll take command until this wears off. Besides it'll be good for you to take a few days off after your ordeal."
"You won't be rid of me that easily. I still intend to get some work done around here," She said. "There's plenty I can get accomplished without having to answer any questions. I'm not going to confine myself to quarters."