CLAIRE'S BRITHDAY
It's my first try at Final Fantasy fanfiction so go easy on me, OK?
And remember: Final Fantasy, Final Fantasy 7 & all remaining indicaremain the trademarks of Square/Enix, dig?
Thanks to the efforts of upgrading, the Highwind capable of interstellar and hyperspace (faster than light) travel, so it was no wonder, one morning when it chose to land on the planet earth, in an obscure town somewhere in California.
After a minute or two, a quartet of people came out, and walked up the streets of a suburban section; they the last Cetra, Aeris Gainsborough, Tifa Lockheart, Yuffie Kisaragi and Elena Rock. And all were carrying big handbags while the explored the neighborhood streets and houses, or as Tifa called them, "yuk houses."
"It's a drag, you know that?" said Tifa. "I never even entertained at a children's birthday party before."
"What bout the times you entertained at Marlene's birthdays before?" said Yuffie. "No different from what we're doing right now. I wager miss Claire Wintesky will get a big kick out of it."
"Particularlly," added Elena, "since she also happens to be the biggest Final Fantasy fan-or is that otaku? Either way, they may be both correct."
"If only the neighborhood wasn't so typical 50s to 60s kitsch," stated Aeris. "Louvered glass windows, with big kitchen windows, with diamond designs and hot mopped roofs, with split leveled garages. Tch, that went out with washers and dryers in the garage."
"Here's the place," said Yuffie, pointing out a one story house painted yellow, with white gravel roff texturing, white trim and a big fountain in the porch, "42127 Hickory Grove. Let's show miss Claire what we can do."
"Place doesen't look bad," said Elena. "When me and Tseng get married, I want a two story version, across the street from The La Brea Tar Pits."
"You a sourdough?" said Tifa.
"The sourest," replied Elena. "Well, into the breach."
Upon arriving at the front door, Tifa rang the bell and the said door opened and Jenny Wintesky, Claire's mom stuck her head out and said, "Ah, the gals from Final Fantasy 7! Come on in, Claire's waiting for you!" then while the ladies entered, the said Jenny called out, "OK, Claire, guess who's here? You're going to get your wish-from Final Fantasy 7, Tifa, Aeris, Yuffie and Elena!"
Standing before Tifa & Co. were a big crowd of cheering children, among which was a brown blonde child of 5, in a Final Fantasy 7 t shirt and skirt, no doubt, Claire hereself, and it was at that point that Aeris chirped, "Greetings and salutations, children! We've come so far from our home planet, because today is-"here, she and the other ladies yelled in unison-"CLAIRE'S BIRTHDAY!"
While Claire and the other children jumped and cheered, Yuffie said, "So happy birthday, Claire Wintesky! Uh, where is Claire?"
At that, she, Aeris, Tifa and Elena began looking all over the room calling out for Claire, Elena saying, "Come on out, I don't bite," before some boys and girls playfully shoved Claire a bit forward, and she called out, "Here I am."
"Well, hello and happy birthday, Claire!" said Tifa, who knelt down before the child and hugged her before the other ladies repeated the ritual.
"How old will you be?"asked Aeris
"Five," said Claire shyly, her face blushing.
"Five, huh?" said Elena. "Well, today must be a big day for you."
"Will you marry Tseng, I hope?" asked Claire.
Blusing, the Turk replied, "Oh, you better believe I will!" flattered at the child's query.
"Out from the mouths of babes," said Aeris, who then asked, "Claire, do you have a favortie food?"
"Politician sandwhiches," was the reply.
"Politician sandwhiches?" said Yuffie. "What's that?"
"Beef baloney sandwhiches with mustard," said Claire with a laugh.
"Hey, while we're on the subject," said Tifa, "any around here? We hadn't had anything to eat for hours."
"Right over there," said Claire, pointing to a table.
After taking their share of sandwhiches, the ladies stood before the children and those present, with Claire between Aeria and Tifa on the left and Yuffie and Elena on the right, the Cetra saying, "You know, Claire, would you like it better if you stood next to me?"
"Wait," said Elena, "wouldn't you like it better if you stood next to me?"
"Better still," said Yuffie, "it would be better if you stood between Tifa and me."
"Over the trap door, that is," quipped Tifa.
"Now then," said the female Turk known as Elena, "let's get to the gist of the matter: what do we sing when it's someone's birthday?"
"Happy birthday," said one child.
Blushing, Aeris giggled, "Oh, thank you, but it's not my birthday-yet."
"It's Claire's birthday," said another girl.
"Claire's birthday?" said Tifa. "Why, Claire, why didn't you say so?" Then to the rest of the crowd, she said, "Well, let's get ready to sing, all together now, 1, 2, 3, 4" But to everyone's surprise, the four ladies sung Jingle Bells while they danced aound as Claire giggled before some other child piped up, "Not Happy Birthday!"
As time went on, with cake, gifts, dance and fun, the ladies had Claire and the children line up before then, Tifa, going "Ah choo," and Aeris pointing to her cheekbones and hissing playfully, "Smile"-that brought a lot of laughs from the crowd. Then Yuffie said, "OK, now let's get everyone to sit down."
And after the children did just that, Elena said, "OK, now let's stand up again." More laughs as the crowd stood up again.
"OK, children," announced Tifa, "let's play a game for prizes and that is our first Materia hunt; whoever collects the most materia will win the first prize, got it?"
"YAY!" cheered the children.
"Then out to the back yard and good luck," said Aeris, who opened a sliding door; after Claire and the children (and some of their 'rents) ran out, she said to Yuffie, "You sure you stashed the materia where the children can see them?"
"Sure I did, I mean, does a bear growl in the woods?" said the Wutaian kunoichi.
"Well, I ain't convinced," said Elena, who went and frisked then patted down an annoyed Yuffie before saying, "OK, she's clean, no stolen materia."
"I heard of risky business," grumbled Yuffie, "but frisky business?"All Aeris and Tifa could do was laugh a little at that.
One hour later, the winner with the most materia collected as-who else?-Claire, who was given a big hug from Yuffie, who said, "Congrats! Well, as you can see, our grand prize winner is our Final Fantasy sister (again, she and the other ladies jouned in chorus), CLAIRE!" More cheers from all present.
"And so, added Aeris, who reached in her big purse, "for our grand prize winner, Claire, she gets a collection of Final Fantasy otaku figures, from the Story Image Figure series! Congratulations, Claire!" then handed some boxes containign the figures to the happy birthday girl.
"For all you second place winners," added Tifa, "you all get crummy second place prizes from the Midgar slums." More laughs.
From there as the day passed Aeris and Co. danced with the children; at one point, the Cetra started to sing Eyes On Me, until Elena broke in saying, "Uh, Aer, Eyes On Me is Final Fantasy 8, not 7."
"That sucks," mutered the disenchanted Aeris, before the children giggled.
After a day of partying, hugss, kisses, gifts, as well as "Thank yous" and "Goodbys" Aeris & Co. were walking down the long road back to the Highwind, Tifa saying, "Boy oh boy, what a day, that party truly swung."
"That ain't all likely to swing," grumbled Elena. "I got a good mind to sue whoever built that Chocobo pinanta."
"So?" said Yuffie, "No one told you to look under the pinata."
"I was only trying to fix it," stated the Turk, after so many children hit that thing so many times and it still wouldn't break open. How was I to know it broke open after I touched it slightly? Least I was able to get all those Rolos out from my hair.."
"That reminds me," said Tifa, "got any left over? I got the itch for a Rolo fix."
"Save me some, OK?" said Aeris.
THE END OF YE TALE