My name is Halin Chan, and I was born on Deralia, a small planet on the Outer Rim. My name and family ties are unimportant, or so I've been told. I remember having a mother, a father, an older brother… but the details are hazy. Occasionally I think I can see them in the odd dream, though truth be told, I've long forgotten what they look like. I was so young when I was brought here that I remember quite little of my life before coming to the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine for training.
It was nearly eighteen years ago when Master Sana found me on my home planet and convinced my parents to give me to the Jedi Council for training. My story is not particularly unusual. After all, nearly every child brought to be trained in the ways of the Force can tell you quite a similar tale, though some were old enough to remember more details of their past than others. Contact with family is discouraged, as are the emotional bonds that can easily form from such. Since I was too young to read or write at the time, the contact ceased immediately.
I can only assume that this was for the better. After all, it is easier to liberate oneself from base passions if they never existed to begin with. Such is the code of the Jedi:
There is no emotion; there is peace.
There is no ignorance; there is knowledge.
There is no passion; there is serenity.
There is no death; there is the Force.
I've been taught, for as long as I can recall, to live and to breathe and to die by this code. My thirst for knowledge has been particularly noted by my Masters. I hardly find this aspect of myself to be unusual. After all, when one is surrounded by the wisdom of so many ages, how can one not become curious? This was an aspect of my character which had originally attracted Master Sana. While I do not personally recall the meeting first-hand, she has told me of it before. My curiosity combined with affinity and sensitivity to the Force allowed me to learn far more quickly than the average child of my age, and it was this that caused her originally to believe she could teach me.
"You have a great destiny about you, child," she tells me. "What you choose to make of it, when your time comes, will send ripples throughout the galaxy—ripples in the Force that will be felt for many years to come. However, you must beware not to take things at face value. After all, there is always more to our surroundings than what can initially be seen."
Whether great destiny or not, my life as a Jedi is to serve. I believe that our teachers tell us such things, particularly when we are young, and that we choose to believe them in order to see ours as a 'noble' cause. It makes our otherwise seemingly irrational way of life have a greater purpose and meaningfulness.
At the age of ten, I was granted the rank of Padawan, the lowest rank among those who had been fully accepted into the Jedi Order after their apprenticeship. Not every child taken into apprenticeship can get so far. In fact, if they cannot attain the rank of Padawan by thirteen, they are generally decided to be unfit for further training and are sent into public service elsewhere.
Such was the case of a girl named Rahala Santra, who was six years older than me, and unable to complete the Jedi Initiate trials. As was tradition, she was sent into public service on Telos as an alternative. We had been friends, and so we have kept occasional contact since then. The last I heard, she was engaged to be married—a life certainly different than she would have found in the Jedi order. That was several years ago though, and I've not heard from her since. Perhaps her own fate will be greater served in this way. The Force, after all, acts in mysterious ways.
When I was granted the rank of Padawan, Master Sana immediately requested to assigned as my Master. Given her interest in me since a young age, it seemed only natural. And so, with the Council's permission, I began to further train in the ways of the Force under the mentorship of Master Sana.
I feel that the two of us are quite a fit for one another. Where I am terribly eager to learn about the Force, Master Sana is equally as eager to teach. The basics of combat, diplomacy, meditation, and the like came quickly. They were short lessons at the beginning of my training. However, what made Master Sana unique compared to the other Masters was her willingness and even encouragement for me to seek knowledge from outside sources, and to seek self discovery.
The other Masters seemed to grow wary of her teachings for this reason, though why they would somewhat eludes me. In my own understanding of the Jedi code, I have come to accept that a Jedi should seek all knowledge. Without it, how are we to truly grow to fully understand the Force and all of its facets? I've heard some say such teachings can lead to the dark side… but is the Jedi code not the path to resisting the darkness that exists inside of us all?