If I knew everything back then that I knew today, I probably would not have waited.

I was a young girl when the silly man crash landed in my yard. He claimed there was a world big enough for the two of us in a blue box. Not to mention he left an odd mess to clean up in the kitchen.

I think for the first few years, like clockwork, I packed a new suitcase every Saturday. Once I became a teenager, I grew out of the habit. I drew little pictures of a raggedy looking man who jumped into a pool while fully clothed, and a blue telephone box. A few people shrugged off my imaginary friend, but I knew he existed. He was coming back for me.

Maybe.

I turned nineteen and what do you know; another strange man appears in my darned yard. Now, after so many therapists and deductions that the 'Doctor' was an imaginary friend… I started to believe them. I guess after not going for a while their ideas started to fade away. My imaginary friend is back. Unchanged.

No, he's a time traveler. He came through time and back to me as promised twelve years ago. The bloody oaf claims he was gone for five minutes… Oh, please.

He introduced me to alien beings and the ability to travel through time. He showed me a blue door that led to a home, and let me know he was alone.

He left again, and I waited.

Two. Years. Later.

We traveled together when he came back this time. But I didn't let him know what he pulled me away from. My curiosity got the better of me. Or maybe it was my heart? The wonders that I learned and the creatures I saw, I felt they were more amazing than marrying an amazing man. I think I may have regret that at one point, but Rory seemed to forgive me.

After everything the Doctor and I went through, after gathering Rory into our travels, after watching time unravel with the appearance of River and my own flesh and blood Melody, I realized how much I took the Doctor and I's companionship for granted. Here I am just wanting and wanting, taking and taking everything I wanted. I never realized how lonely the Doctor really, truly was.

I loved that time lord so dearly. He was the greatest friend I could have ever asked for. He was the most amazing creature in this entire universe.

I had blindly looked over his care. I tried to do something about it on countless occasions, but I chickened out. I told him I loved him, but always told myself 'as a friend.' Was I an awful person? I tried to convince myself otherwise.

Then the angels came. My Rory. They took my Rory. I knew that I couldn't leave Rory behind this time. Rory waited for me for so damn long that I couldn't make him live a life without me. I scared him once with that idea, and I won't let it happen again.

All I have to do is blink right?

I love you, Doctor. I love everything you did for me. You shouldn't have to be alone anymore. I wish I didn't have to leave you, but I need to be with Rory. After everything him and I went through, I think it actually does mean more to me than all the waiting you put me through. So many years… of waiting. I am so sorry.

I guess I lied.

I would still wait.

Just don't come back and find me, alright? For being the girl who waited, it's time I wait to live out my life and die of old age, and not by the hands of a weird alien.

Just don't be alone anymore. You don't deserve the loneliness. You save us so many times and no one knows. I didn't want to leave you alone like this. I would have travelled with you anywhere. So long as I could have had Rory too.

Goodbye, Doctor.