Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.
A/N:Characters are sometimes ooc. I never liked how the movies went or how weakly Rogue was portaryed in the movies, so this is how I think it should've gone. This story takes place between the first and the second movie. Enjoy. :)
Chapter one Porcelain
~She has a porcelain soul~
John was walking around Xavier's mansion, bored out of his mind.
Can't wait to get out of here for break, he thought. Summer was just around the corner and the students had the choice to either stay there or go out into the city for the break. John wasn't intending on sticking around with the rest of the other mutants that had nowhere to go. He was anxious to hit the streets with those who were his actual friends.
Quiet sobbing filled the hallway and he stopped dead in his tracks. Yeah, crying girls left him nerve wracked, like any other guy, but at the same he really hated that they couldn't control their tears. Especially over something mundane.
John cleared his throat loudly and took out his Zippo, flicking it open and shut, hoping that whoever was crying would get the message and leave.
They didn't.
He sighed and continued walking. Just as he turned the corner, he saw Rogue sitting hunched on the floor by the window, crying. His anger blew out and a rush of sympathy coursed through him. He understood how she felt. Unloved, not wanted, untouchable.
"Are you okay?" he winced at the sound of his voice. He had definitely not planned on talking to her. All he was going to do was walk by and leave her in peace.
Rogue's head jerked up in surprise and she looked at him in shock.
"I'm fine," she said quickly. She stood up and wiped any remains of her tears.
John arched his left eyebrow and leaned on the wall. He smirked at the sound of her southern accent. It made her, cuter, in his opinion.
"Are you sure there's nothing you want to talk about? Cause, I'm sure those pretty eyes of yours say differently," he softly teased her.
Rogue looked down at her feet so he wouldn't see the blush creeping up slowly.
"No, thank you," she murmured and got ready to leave. As she passed him, John reached out and caught her arm. He ignored her flinch and pulled her to him and held her in his arms.
Rogue was surprised at his casual touch and even more from his hug. Hadn't he recalled what had happened to Logan? He had been there, that one unforgettable night. Had he forgotten that her skin was like poison?
She stood there stock still, trying to wrap her mind at the fact that John was treating her like a normal person.
John felt his heart slow down, now that he knew that Rogue didn't plan on hitting him. Much to his surprise, she relaxed onto him and laid her head on his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his upper torso. John softly rubbed her back and didn't say a single thing as she cried silently.
She couldn't believe her luck. Here she was, so sure that she would never be comforted again and John swooped in to save her. To hold her and comfort her with his warm embrace. It was more than enough for her. Especially considering how they didn't even know each other that well. They'd occasionally hang out because Bobby would invite her to hang out with them. That usually consisted of the two boys playing something and Rogue just watching them. There were also all those stories that she had heard about him. How he was a total ass and humiliated crying girls, making them feel bad. That he hated everyone and everything here with a passion, and yet, his hug was so comforting and felt like a refuge. Why had she believed everything that had been said about him?
"Thank you," she whispered, once her tears were gone. John slowly dropped his hands and couldn't resist a smirk when he saw her bite her lower lip as his hands had grazed over her ass.
Rogue ignored his actions and wiped her tears instead.
"Listen," he lifted her chin up so he could see her eyes, "if you ever need an ear, a shoulder to cry on, or whatever, my door is always open. After all, I'm pretty sure Bobby has dragged you in there enough times that you ought to be somewhat used to the place by now, right?" He got off the wall and wiped a stray tear off her face before walking away.
Rogue stood there, dumbfounded, her hand exactly where John's fingers had just been. Where they had caressed her skin softly, as if proving to her that he didn't care what her mutation was. How odd that in those few minutes he had held her, he had made her feel so normal. That was something she hadn't felt since her mutation had made itself known. Since she had found out she was a freak again.
"Are you okay?" someone asked, jolting her back to reality.
Same words, but not the same feeling nor warmth that John's had supplied.
Rogue looked up and smiled nervously. It was that boy again, Bobby.
"Yeah, sorry. Just daydreaming," she forced another smile and walked past him. John was definitely the only person who made her feel normal. She walked by all the students until she finally reached her room.
As she stepped in, sadness welled up inside her again. To the extent of her knowledge, she was the only student without a roommate. The professor had explained that it was for her safety and she understood that, but still, it just made her feel so much more isolated and alone than she already was. What she would do to have a roommate.
Rogue made sure her door was closed before taking off her gloves. Finally, her clothes followed suite and she tied her hair up. She headed to her closet and pulled out a nightgown.
She looked at her full length mirror and wanted to cry at the sight that stood before her. It hurt to see how normal she looked; it killed her inside. Rogue kicked her chair in frustration and curled up on her bed, pulling a cover up to her chin.
Rogue felt so lost. Sometimes, she would wake up and not remember who she was. It terrified her. Her fear was that one day, she would eventually lose herself and never remember who she was.
John was laying in his bed, his mind wandering back to that pretty southern belle. They were the same, him and her. Both untouchable, both so truly alone.
"John, open the curtains," Bobby said as he walked into the room. He turned on the bedside lamp and John sighed.
"I'm trying to sleep," he told him and rolled over to face the wall. He heard Bobby muttering under his breath, something about being lazy.
"Just because you spend all your time flirting with different girls doesn't mean I do," John retaliated.
"Shut up," Bobby snapped, his face flushed in embarrassment. He stormed out of the room and slammed the door.
John laughed and pulled the covers tighter around himself. Damn popsicle had frozen the room.
Little bastard, he thought. He sat up and before he could set Bobby's side of the room on fire, someone knocked on his door. John sighed and got out of his bed, slowly making his way to the door without slipping on the ice.
He swung open the door, his scowl sliding as he came face to face with Rogue.
"Hi," she said meekly, "are you busy?"
"No, of course not. Come in," he said. But just as she was about to step in, he held out his hand to stop her. "Actually, hold on a sec." He turned around and quickly thawed out the room. He turned back to her and grinned. "All right, safe to come in now."
Rogue walked in and could easily discern which side was Bobby's and which one was John's. Bobby's side seemed to be more perfectly in order and stark while John's was cluttered and had posters covering his wall. If she looked closely, she could see burn marks hidden behind them. His clothes were laying everywhere and he had papers strewn all over his desk.
"Sorry for the mess," he said and shoved some of his clothes off his bed. "Not used to having visitors of my own." For once, he was actually envious of Bobby's cleanliness.
"It's fine," Rogue said and nervously played with a button on her jacket.
"Aren't you hot in that thing?" John paused to ask her.
"A little," Rogue admitted.
"Then take it off," he snorted and resumed making his bed more suitable. Rogue blushed and pulled it closer around her.
"I'll hurt you," she mumbled. John sat on his bed and patted the spot next him.
"No you won't," he calmly stated. "Now, take it off."
Rogue stood there for a little, apprehensive about taking it off and yet exhilarated at the thought of sitting next to him without any restrictions. John on the other hand, sat there and waited patiently for her to make up her mind. Finally, she succumbed to his wishes.
Rogue reluctantly stripped off her jacket and gloves. Then she winced mentally.
I probably should've changed.
John's heart nearly stopped. Rogue wearing a nightgown had definitely been what he least expected. Not that he was going to complain about the view. Seeing as it hit about mid thigh and clung somewhat to her skin, allowing for her curves to be put on display. Not to mention the fact that it was low cut and showed a generous amount of her breasts.
Rogue cleared her throat and sat down next to him. She had to admit, even though she was wearing virtually nothing, she appreciated how John didn't flinch away from her.
"That wasn't so hard, now was it?" he asked her. Rogue laughed and put her right hand on her left shoulder. "Would you be more comfortable with a sheet around you?" he asked her.
"I'm fine," she said, determined to sit there as if nothing was wrong with her. "Thanks for the concern though."
"So, Roguey, why have you decided to bless my humble abode with your beautiful presence?" John asked. Rogue blushed at his comment and stuck her tongue out at him. "Childish," he laughed.
"Says the boy, calling me Roguey."
John feigned mock hurt and then lunged at her, trapping her beneath him and proceeded tickling her mercilessly.
"John," she squealed out and tried to get out from underneath him. Once it hit her that their skin was touching, her powers kicked in.
It took John a few seconds longer to feel the pull from her power, longer than it took other mutants, but once he did, he held onto her, whereas Rogue tried to push him off.
"Shh, hold on," he said, eyes closed. Then, very slowly, he pulled himself away. Rogue sat up and looked at him in worry. "What a head rush," he chuckled. "Don't understand why people are scared."
"John, that wasn't funny," Rogue said worriedly. "Are you okay? I could've killed you." He looked at her and saw that she was close to crying.
"Hey, hey, don't cry," he said and pulled her onto his lap. "Look at me Rogue. I'm okay." he put his hands on her shoulders to calm her down. "I feel fine already."
Rogue smiled weakly at him and closed her eyes. She leaned on him and curled up as memories assaulted her. Several of them consisted of John running with three other kids. Mutants like him.
John had his hands loosely around Rogue's waist and watched her. The change in her was pretty much immediate. Her hair got lighter, more of dirty blonde, and her body temperature went up. He lit a candle to disperse the darkness and the flame seemed to be attracted to Rogue like a magnet.
"Are you okay?" John asked. Her eyes snapped open and he saw that they were more brown than green.
"Yeah, yeah. It'll pass soon," Rogue smiled. "Would it kill you to pass me a cigarette though?" His sarcasm was definitely laced in her voice.
"Me?" he asked, wondering where the nicotine craving had come from. Last time he had checked, Rogue didn't smoke.
"I got it from Logan. I can usually suppress it, but now, with you there's that extra kick," she giggled.
"So miss untouchable-yet-touchable, why have you graced me with your presence?" he asked her. He took out a cigarette and lit it for her.
Rogue took it and took a drag from it. John thought she looked amazingly sexy with her hair undone from its ponytail, her eyes closed and her opening her mouth to let the smoke leave by itself. She looked even more tantalizing with her skin uncovered, seeing as how everyone was used to her being covered up all the time.
"I'm just kinda scared to sleep right now," she admitted. "And I thought, 'hey, might as well take John up on his offer.' So here I am."
"Does this mean more cigarettes?" he asked her, shaking the pack.
"Well," she looked at them and felt reluctant to answer. She felt as if saying yes would be overstepping on his hospitality.
"Because if so, we might as well go up on the roof now. Bobby throws a bitch fit every time he smells the smoke," John explained to her.
"Well, what a nancy pants," she smiled and stood up. She blew out the smoke one last time and put it out on his desk. "Let's go," she boldly held her hand out and John accepted it without caution. They walked out of the room, cigarette forgotten on the desk.
They made their way to the staircase that led to the roof and John let go of Rogue's hand in order to open the door. He got it open and grabbed Rogue's hand to drag her with him.
"Do you mind letting go of my hand for a little?" Rogue asked when the were halfway up the stairs. Even though it John longer to feel her powers, she could still get his mutation and memories at about the same rate.
"Sure, sorry," he grinned at her and they continued up the stairs. Once they reached the top, he opened the door wide. "Voila!"
Rogue stepped out and breathed in the fresh air. Meanwhile, John had lit up another cigarette and blew out the smoke in her face.
"Hey," she laughed and waved the air in front of her face. He laughed and offered her some. She accepted it and they stood there in silence, sharing a cigarette.
"How do you get these?" Rogue finally asked him as they sat down comfortably next to each other.
"I got hook-ups," he said and laid down. "So tell me about your powers."
Rogue laid down and looked up at the sky. She took another drag of the cigarette before handing it back to him.
"What's there to say about them?" she snorted. "They suck. I can easily drain the life force of a normal person in mere seconds. Any contact longer than 3 seconds for them is potentially fatal." she sighed and closed her eyes. "A mutant takes a little longer. But any contact for about 5 seconds leaves them weak, but they'll still be okay. I guess you could say it all depends on their strength. Of both themselves and their power. I absorb memories, powers and some characteristics. The last two don't stay there that long. It depends on how much of the mutant I absorbed." She shuddered and John looked over at her. "The worst part are the memories and the people themselves."
"What?" John stared at her, bewildered.
"I guess you could call them psyches, imprints of the people. They talk to me sometimes and if they're stronger than me, they tend to take over sometimes. So they're walking around and I'm stuck inside my own head. It sucks. Especially because I understand why Magneto is doing everything he does and he is the last person I want to think like. Logan and Eric's memories have become my nightmares. I'm just plagued by them on a daily basis."
She drew in a long shaky breath and John realized how upset she was
"Hey, you can take your time you know. You don't have to spill everything to me right away," he told her.
"I'm fine. This helps. You know, sometimes I don't remember who I am. I feel as if I've always been Logan and I need to know why I can't remember my past or I think I'm Magneto and I need to continue fighting to make this a better world for mutants. And I literally lose myself." She laughed darkly and rolled her eyes. "I remember, after the Liberty Island incident, I had to have a paper taped on my mirror that listed my name, age, and the place I was at. Luckily I don't really need that anymore." She smiled weakly at him and John saw the tears in her eyes.
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. They laid there silently, breathing synchronized, cigarette slowly burning away, forgotten by both teens.
"I thought the professor was supposed to be helping you with this," John finally said. The smell of smoke caught his attention and he looked over and saw the cigarette. He grabbed it and took a drag.
Rogue snorted and John slowly let her go.
"Yeah, big help he's been," she drawled out, rolling her eyes.
"What do you mean?" John wondered.
"There's only one thing he really wants Johnny," she laughed, tapping her head. He winced slightly at the nickname. "All he wants are my new memories. After all, what better way to see what Magneto's been planning than through me?" She scoffed and crossed her arms. "He says that I'm helping his cause, it's for the greater good. Well, fuck the greater good." she snapped. She sat up, pulling her legs up to her body.
There would be my temper, John mused as he followed suite, leaving his legs outstretched.
"I just want to be myself. I want to clear my head of all these damn people." She seemed to deflate and shrink inwardly. "I only want to control my mutation," she whispered. Rogue turned to look at John and smiled softly. "Thank you," she murmured and grazed her fingers over his hand.
"For what?" he asked her.
"For being here."
He smiled and caught her hand.
"For you Rogue, any day," he told her and kissed the back of her hand. They got up and he let her hand go slowly. He finished the cigarette and flicked it away. They walked back inside and John took her back to her room.
"See you tomorrow?" Rogue asked him nervously, not knowing where this whole night left them standing. He nodded and hugged her tightly.
"Sleep tight, princess," he whispered and ruffled her hair before walking away.
Rogue smiled as she watched him walk away and shook her head as she went in.
John stretched as he walked to his room and yawned. He twirled his Zippo and thought about the way Rogue's hair seemed to flutter in the wind. The way she had looked up at him so nervously, when they had arrived at her room was strangely cute. He grinned to himself and finally got to his room. Once he opened the door, he wished he would've taken his time.