MAKTUB

Maktub means "it's written". A kind of conformation, tipical of the muslin religion, about what is our destiny, if our life is already defined in such a way we can´t determine or make decisions by ourselves.

Megumi found Kaoru breathing hardly. Her vital organs were starting to burst. Her departure was eminent. She ran fastly to the restaurante and called Yahiko.

- Tae-san, Yahiko! Please, Kaoru is in a very critical state! I need you to send an urgente request for Kenji, Missao and all the others who are far away!

Yahiko stood still. You are never prepared to watch our dear beloveds died, even though we are aware of their situation. Tae started to cry. Tsubane took her in her arms for console.

- So soon? Why? We had just lost Kenshin…I don't know if can stand the loss of Kaoru – Tae was crying and sobbed.

- It's the natural life course. The most importante is that you must hide that sadness in front of Kaoru. I' going back to dojo. She can´t stay alone. – Megumi ran back

Tae and Tsubane sent mail pigeons with the new. Yahiko was paralysed, clenching his fists on his chest. He wanted to do something about such unjustice, but there was nothing he could do...he felt so impotente!

The female doctor and the disciple didn´t sleep all night. They pray for Kaoru, just to hold on some few more hours. They allowed his friends to stay with him, so he could receive some confort.

The day rised, a Summer day, warm and sunny.

Hiko received the news by the morning and prepared the disciple.

- You have to go back to Tokyo. Your mother's health state got worse…

The boy understood the message just before Hiko could finish to speak. During the morning he went to the centre of Quioto, ahead to the train station. Missao fell in tears while reading the message. The light of her dearest friend was fading. He got hiself prepared among Aoshi to leave. The rest of the members had to stay in the inn. They had the house full, due to the upcoming Summer Festivals.

They arrived at Tokyo in the following day, as well as other friends that were scattered out there. The Kamiya dojo was full of people again. This time due to a tragical motive.

Kaoru could no longer move. He heard voices, urgente steps from one side to other. She gave a light smile, when remenber the house plenty of life, friends, family. A sudden fealing of peace went across her all body.

I remenber of having people around me, figures! My absortion capacity was on the limits…i just could understand words like "poor one" or "i´m sorry"prolonged. I felt light, I felt my worries and obligations no longer hunted me…I felt an infinite peace. I realized for some reason my stade in the world was getting to an end. I had no regrets, neighter miss nobody. I felt like a lighten peace was taking care of me. When all those voices were distant, I heard a forgotten word, a sweet word that make me return in seconds, revived my memory, warmed my heart

"mother"…

touch me in the hand…a sad feeling went through me and i recalled, before the last breath, where I was, who I was, and finally my whole life. It sound like a second, too fast. I didin´t have to open my eyes to see who was holding my hand…my son…the one who came out of me as a result of unforgetable love nights, result of a full life.

I smiled as I was feeling his presence. Now I´m Consciousness, but life has no hour or minute…my strenghts are leaving my body.

I woke up in a room, a waiting room, with west chairs and a only door. In front of me there was na old woman and by her features, she should be from a country in South of China. She asked me: "You are so beautiful and young and yet you are already here?" I smiled for the "beautiful" and to hide my ignorance. I had no idea where I was. A few minutes later, the old woman got out and I stood alone, sitting on that square room with ten chairs. I noticed then, in a small picture suspended in front of me. It ilustrated a boat, a beach and a nice Summer day. Minutes went by, nobody came up, nothing to hear…I went back to my thoughts. I went back to my life. In a gerky gesture, I took my hand to the head and I remembre that I was in fact dead. "I died!" so this is the feeling….I didin´t get sad, but confused. Weird. I stood like that, maybe for the whole afternoon. During all that time, I found myself thinking in everything I left behind. I remember that my husband could be also there! I felt happy, impatient, I wanted to go out. I went ahead to the door but suddenly I stoped and this thought caught me: "Is he still sick, consumed by past evils?" I thought in a lot of things, maybe in to much. I stood still.

The truth is I had a life plenty, I laughed, cried a lot, I wouldn't changed anything. I was very happy, among all the difficult times. I'm now in a room thinking about all that and the legacy I leave. You gave a mening to my life, I would rather not to born than not knowing you. But, what keeps me away from open the door and go? I don´t know. I feel like I lived a life of taking somenone's place, despite you say otherwise. I never felt I was a second choice, but I feel we met because she no longer existed. As I was thinking about all this through the room, I heard a noise and looked down and saw a paper. It wasn't there before. I opened it and rode what it was written "Before you open that door, choose: live or stay in eternity".
I sat down in the nearest chair. I got a bad feeling, I got scared. I had to choose, but live what? Another life in another place? Whith who? In eternity? I don't understand.

Confused, I fell asleep.

I woke up a few minutes later, in a sudden way. I had a dream representing a part from the story. I missed you with all my heart, and I found you again on the way home. You look exausted due to your sickness. I tried to confort you in my lap, under a cherry tree, telling you things about the dojo and our family. And from all the battles I faced, the hardest one was loosing you in my arms. Loosing you was a terrible pain and I beged to go with you.

I guess your choice was "live again", for you strenght, your willness to defend and take back what you took from parents, children, from the world! I want you to live, I want you to find someone to love, to build a life together. I wont be there to bother. I was never a coward, but maybe I'm one now. I'm afraid to find you and live another life of sufferness. Because I spent hours, days, months and years in a place where you were the only who was bright. When you weren't around, there was darkness. I waited for you on the road, during endless hours, with my eyes set on the horizon, imagined that you wouldn't return.
That someone had killed you, or that you simply wanted to roam the world again.

I prefer to keep forever all the love I have for you, how you made me a woman and how with just a touch of yours you made me melt in a sea of affection and exaltation of senses.

I'm leaving behind a world that I don´t want to repeat, because I'm afraid to live the worst, to meet you today and lose you tomorrow. I prefer not to live than live and can never touch you again. I thank to all the people that provided me joys, smiles, friendships, I love you all! I want to stay in na eternal sleep imagining the person I have loved most in every age, every minute, you look at me with those wonderful eyes full of passion. All the moments that I have lived are engraved in an unintelligible line of thought.

All the moments I had lived are recorded.

I wish you to have a wonderful life. I hope you can find another woman, and you find in her what you haven't found on me.

I walked ahead to the door, sure of my decision. I remember my son' voice and his wrinkled hand as a result of the sword training. Is he going to be okay? So much ideas, worries…but I have to focus. They no longer have mean to me.

I opened the door. It was dark outside. I wasn't afraid. I sighed. I was only afraid to forget the path I walked through in the world….But such a beautiful story could never fade…will never faid inside of me. I took the step, convicted. I passed the door then it closed by itself. It was dark I heard distant voices… not sure who they belonged to... from children maybe. I got scared. I couldn't see anything, but I had the feeling that I was in na infinit space. What was going to happen now?..

I waited…

I heard a severe noise at the end…I looked but I didin't see anythin! Few seconds later, that same noise, identical to a train, came from all directions. Suddenly I felt cold air corrents, that made me lose my balance and, at the same time that awful noise rounds me. I got scared, I almost screamed for help and wraped my arms around me.

Suddenly, everything stopped, all my strenght abandoned me…I felt dormant and a blackout.

"Kenshin"

Jinpu was getting down the stairs, when he heard a noise. He looks back and sees a flash. A light beam come out from a temple towards to the sky. Jinpu realized that something happened to Kaoru. Another lighting hit the small temple and burned it. Jinpu recoiled frighten, he is afraid to believe all that – The elements are manifesting… - He thought…

N.A - Hello! This is a story about love and suffering. It was started in 2008 and I decided to do a translation to English. Although it is not finished I translating slowly the already existing chapters. I´m portuguese so I apologize for any grammatical errors. I hope you enjoy it and all the opinions are welcome. Thank you