Author's Note:

I am getting back into fanfiction as a way to improve my writing ability and for fun.

I will be busy with all sorts of things every so often, but I will try to put time into writing stories.

Anyways…

Incoming Manga Spoiler: Sajin Komamura gave up his humanity from a special technique to defeat a Sternritter in the Thousand-Year Blood War final arc, and after the battle, he became a quadruped wolf who can't talk (really depressing, right?). So, I decided to change up the story a bit so that he was able to revert back to his "anthropomorphic" form, but out of commission for the rest of the war.

I chose to write this story in a first-person perspective of a somewhat young but experienced Shinigami guy who was just promoted to captain of a division, where he will get to know Komamura better and eventually fall for him.

I will try to make sure that there are not too many characteristics of the reader's character (such as height, hair length and color, eye color, face structure, lean or stocky body, etc.), so that anyone reading this story are able to picture themselves in this tale of falling in love with the wolf captain.

This first chapter of this story will be told from Komamura's POV, but most of the other chapters will be told from the reader's character's POV. There may be some chapters later on that may be told again from Komamura POV.

There will be mature content in this story, so be warned.

The first three chapters of the story will be technical and canon-heavy, but the rest of the story will have less of that and will be focused on the relationship between the reader's character and the captain.

I saw the Sternritter blown away from Kokujō Tengen Myō'ō.

Her bloody blue wings shattered as she catapulted far into the distance of the icy buildings of the Wandenreich. I sighed and looked around, and found the gleaming palace where the mustached leader of the enemy army resided in a few kilometers away, and started to walk towards it, revenge boiling within me.

"That fucker," I muttered under my breath, clenching my fists around the handle of my zanpakuto. "I will kill him, for what he has done to all the Shinigami, and for what he did to the commander. I will avenge you, Captain Yama."

I remembered the face of the man who rescued me and helped me with my difficult life all those years ago. His wrinkled face, his shut eyes, his flat grey beard, and the hunchback that complemented his old age. Despite being an elderly man, his presence was full of strength and authority. Not only that, but it also contained a sense of genuine care for his soldiers. I recalled a past memory of the captain opening his eyes as he asked me about my situation when I was a teenager, right around the walls of where the Shinigami lived. After I told him about my struggles, he smiled. He recommended me to the Shinigami training academy.

I will never forget that smile.

My eyes welled with tears from that memory as I kept approaching the palace. Suddenly, the shadow of my bankai started disappearing. I looked behind and saw the giant disintegrating into nothingness. My eyes catch movements on my arms and saw light brown fur growing again, covering my light-golden skin.

I realized my time with the human transformation technique ran out.

I looked on towards the palace.

"I may not be able to reach you, Yhawch, but I know the rest of us will." I mumbled as I collapsed onto the flat, cold ground, breathing heavily. "We will."

I shivered as my nose turned back into a muzzle, with fur around and a shiny black snout right at the tip, pointing towards some ice-covered buildings in front of me. I groaned as my teeth sharpened, my fangs re-elongating back to their former size. I felt my ears contract as my tongue flattened slightly. My tail pushed out of the back of my pants. Normally when I am in public, I tuck and hide my tail into the left thigh of my pants in order to hide my "beastly-ness" from other Shinigami. After Kenpachi broke my helmet and Tousen betrayed me a few years ago, I chose to go without a helmet, and my subordinates in the 7th Division and the rest of the Shinigami from the other divisions did not pay too much notice. I was happy that many of them did not care about my appearance, but I still hid my tail as a force of habit, and if I were in a fight, no one would be able to grab or cut my tail off, so I still kept my tail hidden.

My tail stuck out, and I felt my legs fluff up with fur. My toes in my shoes pushed around and rearranged themselves. I imagined that instead of the five toes almost everyone else has, my feet will revert back to the four big fur-covered, padded toes.

I am surprised that there is no pain as I am transforming back to…

I remembered what my great-grandfather said.

"Sajin, when this technique finishes, you will become a beast constantly in search for revenge."

I knew what he meant right away at the time.

And I was prepared to throw my life away, for the sake of the future of Soul Society, and the Shinigami who need to keep living.

So, I ripped my heart out with my zanpakuto.

Becoming a beast was disheartening.

I opened my mouth to speak, and only a gargle of whines and rough grunts came out. I closed my eyes, feeling my hips tilt downward and my shoulders pushing into my chest. I am beginning to shrink significantly as well, looking up at the seemingly larger buildings around me.

I hate this. I hate this so much. I do not want to become an animal. I will be only able to do so much in this forsaken world.

I silently cried, letting my tears flow down my fur-covered cheeks as my transformation comes to a still.

…

…

From the dark depths of my eyelids, I see a man.

A long-haired, dark man.

His eyes shone bright with his gentle smile.

…

"Tousen?" I thought in my head.

"Yes, Sajin?" The former captain whispered as he frowned a little. "You don't look to happy."

I was a little startled by him hearing my internal voice and giving a response.

"You can see now?" I said in my head.

"Yes." Answered Kaname. "And I'm glad to see you again. What's your current problem?"

I whimpered, something I rarely do. "My humanity is fading. I'm going to become a beast soon. I may lose my memories of you, and everyone else too. I'm afraid of losing myself, despite being a captain, despite being someone who is prepared to sacrifice their own life. I am afraid of not being able to do anything anymore. I just… served my purpose."

"Sajin," Tousen quietly said, "That is normal. We all fear for everyone else, we fear ourselves, and we fear what will happen to us. However, the will to fight for a just cause will always be of greater importance than our lives. That is why we became Shinigami. But as for you, even being a wolf, you still retain those aspects of being alive, and sometimes having humanity just means that you are alive. Canines have their own memories, have their own emotions, and have their own version of "humanity" too."

I smiled sadly at him.

"I guess you're right. I am probably not completely ready to let go." I said, looking away from Kaname's gaze.

"But Sajin, you don't have to let go." Whispered the former 9th Captain. "You can believe. You can believe you are back to who you originally were. To the wolfish captain everyone in Soul Society knows, to the good friend I know." Tousen's eyes were edged with tears. "I… I believe in you."

My vision blurred with tears.

…

"Okay." I said. "I will. I will take care of Hisagi. I will take of Hinamori and Izuru. I will care of everyone else too."

…

"Okay then." Whispered Kaname. "I will see you again, hopefully not too soon, right?"

He chuckled and smiled again, showing his bright white teeth.

"Right." I said as I felt my own lips curve into a smile.

Then I blacked out.