Hey guys! Sorry it's been so long since my last fic. Life has been crazy busy, and rehearsals are occupying all of my time. This fic is inspired by a song by Tim McGraw and Faith Hill. The first time I heard it was when I saw them in concert and I fell in love with it. Since the Omelia 'split' this song has really given me some Omelia feels!
Standing at the bar tryin' to get a drink,
got one I hadn't touched at the table.
Somebody said you're here, but I ain't gonna leave,
maybe I'll just act like you're a stranger.
Amelia knew she shouldn't have agreed to go to Joe's, though her friends insisted she needed a night out, she knew that a bar was the last place she should be right now.
It had been been almost a month since her marriage to Owen had ended. Though technically they were still married, she had moved out and he had moved on. Well maybe not moved on, but she has seen him more than once with Carina. There was definitely something. Yes she had also slept with someone else, but it was a one time thing and meant nothing. Owen's was more than nothing, and she was surprised how much that hurt her.
Sure, they were acting friendly, treating each other like friends. She had tried to be so cool when she had accidentally crashed Owen and Carina's French toast date, but the truth was it was like a knife in her heart.
April and Arizona knew she was in a bad place, and with the two of them single too they had decided she needed a girls night. So here she was at Joe's, standing at the bar trying to get Joe's attention.
Some handsome man had bought her a drink. If this had been five years ago she might have shot it back before taking him home. But she was sober now, and though a bar was full of temptations, Amelia was doing her best to stay sober. Yes she could still take the cute guy home, but she wasn't ready for that. Maybe Owen was okay flaunting his new relationship in front of all their friends but she wasn't. And she wasn't ready to move on. So she left the drink untouched on her table and sauntered up to the bar to try to get something non alcoholic.
"Amelia I am so so sorry," April's voice came from behind her.
Amelia spun around to see April and Arizona standing there looking at her so guilty.
"We didn't know he would be here," Arizona added.
Amelia was not sure what they were talking about, but all of a sudden over their shoulders she saw him. Owen. On the dance floor with his arms around Carina.
"Amelia? Are you mad?" April's voice brought her out of her thoughts.
Oh god had she been staring at Owen and his date? She definitely had. Looking back sheepishly at her friends she shrugged. "It's okay, you didn't know he would be here."
"Do you want to leave?" April asked concerned.
"No it's okay," Amelia replied. "Let's just pretend he isn't here. Don't let him ruin our night."
Do you know how hard it is tryin' to hold a conversation?
Knowin' you're right there across the room,
so I don't hear a word that they're sayin'.
No, I don't hear a word that they're sayin'.
Amelia let her friends pull her out on to the dance floor. They did a good job of trying to keep her distracted, but her gaze kept flickering over to the booth where Owen and Carina were now sitting. She knew her friends were trying to talk to her, to distract her, but she wasn't registering anything they were saying. She was too focused on Owen.
Maybe she should leave. Maybe this was all too much for her. All she wanted to do was walk over there and kiss him. To show him that she still had feelings and that this separation was a big mistake. But he was with Carina now, and they had agreed to move on. So why was it so hard for her to do?
I'm dancing with a girl, got my eyes closed,
actin' like I'm lost in the music.
All I'm thinkin' 'bout is holdin' you close,
I don't know how much longer I can do this.
Owen hadn't wanted to come out at all tonight. He was in a bad mood after a day of back to back traumas, and all he wanted to do was go home and sleep for two to three weeks. And if he was being honest, part of his bad mood was from having to avoid Amelia all day. Though they pretended they were friends now and things were good, seeing her was still too painful. So he avoided it as best he could.
Carina had insisted that he accompany her to the bar, wanting to blow off some steam and dance. He had agreed thinking what did he have to lose? What he didn't count on was Amelia being there. Seeing her was difficult, that much he knew, but what he didn't count on was how being there without her by his side would affect him.
Carina had pulled him out onto the dance floor the second they had arrived. She pressed her body close to his and danced in a way that should make any man lose all control. Except him. While she was dancing he caught a glimpse of a familiar petite frame over at the bar. She seemed to be waiting to order a drink. He felt his heart sink. She must be drinking again. He had done this to her. When Amelia did finally get the bartender's attention and a drink was produced Owen was relieved to see it was just water.
Owen saw Arizona and April approach Amelia, acting like they were having a good time. He internally kicked himself for thinking she was that broken up about him that she would drink again. His gaze was still fixated on Amelia when he noticed her own flicked up to meet him. They shared a surprised look before Amelia turned her attention back to her friends.
Carina was still dancing up against him, and kept grabbing at his hands indicating for him to put them on her. He was suddenly struck by how much he didn't want to be there. Sure Carina was hot, and he was sure she was a great person, but she wasn't the one he wanted. She wasn't the one he wanted to be dancing with. He wished it was Amelia pressed up against him instead, wished it was her he could hold close. Taking a step away from Carina and muttering some lame excuse about the bathroom Owen left the dance floor.
Do you know how hard it is bein' in this situation?
Knowing you were everything,
and now havin' to act like we're nothing.
And pretendin' that I don't still love you.
He still had his eyes on Amelia as he made his way off of the dance floor. She had just let her friends pull her out onto the dance floor, and the fear of having her near and not being able to reach out for her made him flee. Instead he walked up to the bar and ordered another drink. He was going to need it to get through tonight.
He could feel Arizona and April's eyes on him, while Amelia was obviously trying to ignore his presence. Who was he kidding, of course she didn't want him back. She was moving on, she was out with friends, dancing, having a good time, and paying him no attention. There she was, the woman who used to be his whole world, who was still his whole world if he was being honest, but now they were nothing. He had no right to still care, or lay claim over her. He had been the one to end it. It was a mistake, he knew it the second she moved out, but it was too late. He had lost her.
Amelia noticed Owen leave the dance floor. He walked off in the middle of a song leaving Carina standing there stunned. She wondered what had happened, some lovers' quarrel. A part of her wished that it was because of her, that seeing her made him realize he didn't want Carina. But the rational side of her was sure it must be for some other reason.
She knew it was stupid, irrational even, but she felt drawn to him. She craved being near him, hearing his voice, feeling his touch. So she gave a lame excuse to her friends and headed towards the bar. It was a bad idea, she knew it was. Talking to him would only lead to more pain. But she approached him anyways.
You or me baby, who's gonna break first?
You or me baby, who's gonna break first?
Who's gonna walk up and say "hi"
then lean in a little close to whose lips
say, "What the hell are we doin'?"
You or me, baby, who's gonna break first?
"Hey stranger," Amelia breathed in a voice that was much too cool for how she was feeling.
Owen turned around to face her giving a look she could not read. Was he happy? Angry? Nervous?
"Hey to you too," he grinned. She was being too friendly. Did that mean she really was over him, content to be just friends? Or was she pretending she was okay the way he was?
"Having a good night?" she inquired. God she hated small talk.
"It's alright," he shrugged. "I'm not much of a dancer, as you know."
"Hey now," she giggled. "I thought you were doing alright."
"Ah so you we're watching," he flirted.
She gave him a sultry smile, easily falling back into old habits. "Maybe I snuck a peak."
He smiled at her, instinctively moving a little closer. He noticed her hair was wild, probably from the dancing, and a strand was hanging in front of her face. Without even thinking his hand came up to tuck it behind her ear. At the contact they both froze, eyes locked, no one speaking.
Amelia was the first to move taking a step back and shrugging off Owen's hand. She hadn't wanted to, the contact had been something she had craved for weeks but she was convinced it meant nothing to Owen. She couldn't handle being that close if he wasn't feeling it too.
Owen let his hand drop, his heart sinking as she stepped back. What was he thinking, of course getting Amelia back wouldn't be this easy.
"Well uh, my friends are waiting for me," Amelia said nervously gesturing towards April and Arizona. "And you should probably get back to your date."
She took another step back from Owen, trying to put some distance between them. She was sure the sadness on her face was betraying how she really felt, but she couldn't be bothered. This whole thing just hurt too much. With one last look at Owen she turned around and headed back towards her friends.
Who's gonna say, "What were we thinkin'?"
Who's gonna cut right through the tension?
Who's gonna admit that they miss who worse?
Who's gonna tell who how bad it hurts?
Owen's heart broke all over again watching Amelia turn and walk away. It was his fault they were in this mess in the first place. He was the one who had to say he was unhappy. What did he know? He didn't even give them a chance to be happy after her surgery. He just made this big decision without thinking it through. Without realizing how much he still loved her, how much he needed her. He was the one who tore apart their happiness, it was up to him to fix it.
At this point what did he have to lose? He had already lost the love of his life, why shouldn't he take a risk to get her back? He saw her retreating form disappearing through the crowd and moved to follow.
"Amelia wait!" he called after her.
She spun around eyes locking with his. She had hated walking away from him but she didn't want to get her hopes up. Now he was calling her back and she couldn't help but hope for the best. She moved back in Owen's direction, anticipating what he would say next.
"What are we doing?" Owen asked when she reached him.
"What do you mean?" she inquired, unsure why Owen had called her back.
"Avoiding each other. Being just friends," Owen explained. "What were we thinking?"
"Are you kidding me?" Amelia exclaimed, suddenly angry with him. "You're the one who said you weren't happy. The one who called this all off."
He sighed. She wasn't wrong, it was his fault. "I know," he replied. "I know I did, but I was wrong. I need you, I can't do any of this without you."
Amelia blinked back tears. She had waited so long to hear Owen say this, but now that he did she wasn't sure how to handle it. How could she be sure he meant it? "Owen, you made the decision to end our marriage. You told me you weren't happy, you said we didn't know each other. How can I trust that you're right this time?" Amelia argued. "You moved on. I've seen the two of you around the hospital, hell I've seen the two of you here tonight. How can I be sure that you're not just bored with her and that's why you're suddenly interested in me again?"
He had to admit she had a point, and it hurt him that she was doubting what they had. "Amelia I could never move on from you," he urged. "You're it for me. It hurts me every day to see you and not be able to hold you, or talk to you, or be the reason behind that amazing smile. I tried to move on, because I thought it was what was best for us, but it wasn't. She's not you, and being with her only makes me miss you more."
Amelia sucked in a breath, stunned by his confession. She had been looking for a reason to push him away again, but after those words she couldn't think of a single reason why she shouldn't be leaping into his arms. So she did.
She flung herself towards his body, trusting that he would catch her, and crashed her lips into his. When they broken apart he wrapped her in his arms, pulled her to the dance floor and together they slowly swayed to the music. They stayed like that, caught up in each other for a long time.
They didn't notice when April left, needing to relieve her sitter. They didn't notice when Arizona and Carina made their way to each other, both having been left by the people they came with. They didn't even notice when the two women left together. All that mattered was each other.
Things weren't perfect, but at least they had each other. And together they learned that sometimes someone has to break for something to be put back together again.
You or me baby, who's gonna break first?