Cullen woke up to the sound of her throwing up.
Ellana had finally returned late last night from her month-long trip to the Forbidden Oasis. A whole month of keeping desperately busy to keep from missing her, constant internal arguments with himself over how long to wait to write letters to keep from seeming too pathetic… the list went on. She finally returned, and they had their own...enthusiastic reunion ending in his bed.
This was, at least, a change. Usually, he was the one who woke her accidentally with nightmares. His nightmares, like those of most people, faded almost immediately upon waking. It had taken him many of these nights together to realize that she even had nightmares, much as she took pains not to burden him with them. He had only realized that she had a similar problem as him with frequent nightmares (albeit not from the same cause) when he'd woken one night to find her bolt upright and shivering.
Ellana rarely had nightmares, but when she did, they typically did not fade upon waking. On the rare occasions when he'd realize his sleeping love was having one, and shook her awake, he'd sometimes have to dodge wild blows for a second or two before sense returned to her eyes. Sometimes she'd sob heartbrokenly upon waking. The worst ones, thought, were when she just sat in bed, frozen.
And she would never speak of what she dreamed, either. He'd always ask carefully if she wanted to talk about it. Every time, an echo of panic came into her eyes at the question, and she'd bark a quick "no!"
Cullen stood and walked over to where she was crouched by the pot. He knelt next to her, gathered her loose hair behind her in one hand, and gently stroked her lower back with the other. When she'd stopped, he pulled her back into his chest, sitting down there on the floor with her in his lap. Ellana shook in his arms, huddling into him without speaking.
"S-sorry I w-woke you." She said finally, in a dry raspy voice. Cullen kissed the top of her head.
"Wake me when you have these, love. Let me be here for you. You aren't alone." Cullen replied, ignoring her apology. Honestly, this one was worrying him. She didn't stutter. She never stuttered. He did, when he felt awkward in public in front of her. But she didn't. Cullen slipped one hand up to caress her face before tilting her chin up to look at him.
"Tell me what happened." Cullen ordered her softly. Ellana inhaled sharply and flinched a little, but Cullen spoke again before she could reply. "I know you don't want to talk about it. I know you're afraid of the memory. But this, whatever it is, is eating you, darling. You need to talk about it." With his free hand, Cullen stroked her hair. "I will never let anything hurt you." He swore, staring into her wide frightened eyes.
Ellana inhaled shakily, then started talking. This latest nightmare spilled from her lips haltingly. She kept stuttering through it. Cullen tightened his grip around her, more to remind her that his arms were there then anything else, and stroked her hair with one hand. Tears spilled out of her eyes as she spoke, and when the telling was done she gave way to sobs, burying her face in his chest. Cullen kissed the top of her head, murmuring reassurances. It was only a dream, he told her repeatedly until the crying stilled. When it finally stopped, he scooped her up in his arms, stood and carried them both to the bed. Cullen sat in the middle of it, Ellana cradled tightly to him.
"I'm here," he told her. "No matter what you dream, I'll be here when you wake, holding you." That seemed to help, as Ellana gave a sigh. Cullen just held her until she fell asleep.