His Voice Of Reason
Author; Nightstar Fury of Nightstar Productions
Rated; M for Mature
Disclaimer; I do not own HTTYD, or any of the songs used in this story! :)
1; Wrong Number.
{Astrid's POV}
Finally that last bell of the day rang, I grabbed my books and slung my bag over my shoulder racing out of the class room. It was Friday at last, I put the books away I wouldn't need in my locker and then hurried through the corridor to get outside before the halls got slammed with students from BHS, this stood for Berk High School. It was a good high school, one of the top rated in the Archipelago. Berk was the main island, and then around it were a bunch of smaller ones all connected by train, bridges, and monorail. I wasn't taking the school bus with my friends because I had to get to work. Thank Odin there was no cheer practice tonight due to weather because my boss messed up my schedule and had me on from 3pm to 10pm which were not my normal hours but I wouldn't argue with the paycheck.
"Astrid! Hold up girl, geeze..." Came the voice of my friend Ruffnut. Yep. My name is Astrid. The Archipelago is commonly known as Viking territory since all the people residing here derive from Viking culture. My name means Divine Beauty. My mom though it was fitting since I have blond hair and blue eyes and I'm an only child. My best friend's name is Ruffnut Thorston. She has a twin brother named, Tuffnut Thorston who was best friends with Snotlout Jorgenson. Great names right? Tuffnut and Snotlout were bullies, always picking on the nerds in out class. I'm a senior, we all are and I couldn't wait to be done with school so I could start college and work on becoming a psychologist. I wanted to help people.
That's why I work for a suicide prevention hotline. It was part of a program, like the employees being interns. The bosses were actually trained therapists, psychiatrists, and psychologists. If we did good offering advice and showed we had what it took to do the job on our own without any training then we'd be accepted into the college course after high school graduation. I'd been working for this hotline since I was 16, I was already told I was accepted as soon as I finished high school but I liked it so much that I asked if I could stay and continue to help people. They had no problem with it so this is what I did most nights if I didn't have cheer squad. I turned and faced Ruffnut who jogged up to me. "Ruff, I gotta get going to catch the bus into town..." I sighed heavily.
"I know but I just wanted to ask if you're working this Saturday?" Ruffnut asked.
"You know I work every weekend unless its the holidays. Why?" I ask curiously.
"Snot's having a party, want you to come." Tuffnut added coming up beside his sister now.
"Sorry guys, I can't. I gotta work...I have to run, text ya later!" I call turning and running for the door to get to the bus pick up/drop off area across the street from the school. As I was running, I crashed into someone and stumbled back a bit but felt someone catch my hand and keep me from falling on my rear. Talk about embarrassing. I shook my head and looked to see who I ran into.
"Gods, I'm so sorry...Are you hurt?" I see none other than Hiccup Haddock there looking apologetic. I pull my hand from his and nod.
"No...I'm fine. I wasn't...paying attention to where I was going. Thanks for catching me..." I say sheepishly. 'Way to go, Astrid...Make a fool of yourself and have to be caught by the biggest nerd in school...' She thought. Before Hiccup could say another word, I rushed outside to get to the bus area. There were two. A section across the street to take students into town if they lived there or worked there after school. Then there were the actually school buses that lined up along the entrance side and in back of the school. I worked 4 nights a week, sometimes 5. Iworked Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Friday through Sunday. Friday was only excluded if I didn't have cheer practice due to weather so whenever it was snowing, or raining I 10 to 1 got a call from my boss at lunch hour asking if I wanted to come on for a few hours.
I slumped on the bench, the bus would arrive at 2:20 as always then it was a 20 minute drive into town, then another 5 minutes until I reached the hotline's office building. The bus stopped close to it thankful so I never had to walk far, especially the nights I worked until 10:30pm. As long as I was clocked out by then, then I wouldn't get in trouble for being a minor and working past the 11pm curfew. I checked my phone to see the time as '2:18pm', I saw the bus coming down the road and I stood smiling. I scanned my pass and sat down while the doors closed and the bus departed heading for town.
(20 Minutes Later)
The bus stopped as I pulled my headphones out wrapped the wire around my phone, slipping it into my pocket as I stepped off the bus walking down the street towards the building. Friday nights were always generally a little busy because depressed, and suicidal teens were bored and resorted to hurting themselves. It had actually been my suggestion they make sure more employees were on for the weekends to suit the quota of calls. I was happy when they took it. Entering the building, I saw the room filled with about 20 cubicles. Mine was towards the end, I made my way towards it and clocked in.
My cubicle was basic, a phone with a headset rested on the right side for easy access. The walls riddled with posters about helpful hints, rules, and upcoming dates the office would be closed. There were two wires present, one for the phone and then another to connect the laptop to the main system which is how it all worked. The system wire plugged into a laptop to bring up the call list, then once the phone was plugged in she could take incoming calls that came across the screen. My job was simple, talk people out of suicide and make them feel better about themselves. If an intern couldn't handle a caller, it would be sent to the professionals who would handle it.
I'm good at this, it was all about calming down and finding another way. The cool thing I love about this job is that since a lot of the callers, called frequently for help they asked for people by name although we never give our real ones. If this happened, the caller would be redirected from the main line to the intern they asked for or to make it easier if a caller asked to talk to this person again as in they'd call back or ask to be called back by an intern then the worker would give their extension. And these callers would be listed ahead of new callers in the call queue as the interns would understand that these people needed their help.
Sure it was a reliance type deal, some of these callers really did feel better and depends on the people they talked too often but that was our job. Helping people find another way. Every person who worked for the hotline also had an e-mail that way if a call couldn't be taken...There could be another way but the biggest rule of all was to never get personal with the caller and never communicate by cell phones. I sighed, it sucked because some of these people were really nice and I just wanted to give them a comforting hug but I understood that some people who called could have been faking and it could get dangerous. I plugged my laptop on to the system, then the phone as I watched the list load. Already 10 people sitting in the waiting queue, I sighed putting on my headset and pressing the first one. It was going to be a long night.
(7pm)
I just ended with another caller, she seemed to be in a better mood after talking so I hoped she wouldn't call back. Not in a mean way but our job was to help so if people felt better then they didn't need to call again. Most of the callers just wanted someone to listen and not judge them, some actually had deep issues that required a professionals help. The queue was at a steady 5 people now, if one went away another would come through a few moments later. I was actually a little bored right now, I expected it to be busier. Around 5 or so, one caller came through that I answered but after a second or two of silence it just disconnected. Which had been weird but oh well. Perhaps a wrong number, it happened a lot.
The calls that came through and were answered got moved to a side list that kept up for an hour or so, in case people wanted call backs. I closed my eyes and took a sip from my water bottle when the I saw the number that called and hung up earlier was calling back, I let it ring twice before answering it with, "Never Alone Crisis Hotline. Because your are never alone with us here to help. This is Angel. How can I help you this evening?" It was stupid to say but I didn't come up with the slogan either. Again, silence. Maybe whoever this was calling twice now was just really nervous. I'd wait a few minutes to see if they'd talk or hang up again.
{End Astrid's POV}
(A few Hours Before)
{Hiccup's POV}
Another long, boring day at school but at least it was Friday. I didn't bother rushing out of the class like everyone else because I'd probably be trampled due to my small size and weak body. I sighed moving to my locker to put my things I didn't need for the weekend away, I was instantly jumped on by someone who I only assumed was my twin sister, Heather. I rolled my eyes when she greeted me so happily. "Its finally Friday!" She sang out.
"Yes, Heather...I know..." I mumble.
"Stop being so grumpy..." Heather rolled her green eyes at me. Yes, we were twins. I had auburn hair and forest green eyes while Heather had black hair and bright green eyes. I was born literally a minute before her making me the older between the two of us.
"And you stop slacking or we'll miss the bus and you know dad hates having to send a squad car to pick us up..." I remind my sister as we move towards the side exit where our bus would be only no sooner than I began to walk, I was crashed into by Astrid Hofferson. One of the most popular girls at our school and someone I'd liked since the 8th grade but she barely knew I existed. I saw her stumbled back about to fall so I reached out and grabbed her hand, asking if she was alright and apologizing. I knew she wouldn't admit to running into me so I might as well take the blame as I do for everything. She only said she was fine and actually admitted she wasn't paying attention but before I could say anything else she bolted out the main entrance doors.
"Come on, Hiccup!" Heather urged. I sigh again as my younger sister drags me to our bus, we get on as I sit back and try to relax. I hated being at home. Ever since our mother was killed in a drive by shooting, our father has worked constantly to find the one who did it. What was worse was that there was never a body found, just the blood found at the scene was hers. Everyone tried to call it a cold case but dad was stubborn, and chief of police so he wasn't giving up until he found her body and the killer. Then again it was only assumed she was dead, it'd been almost 3 years since it happened. Dad was never the same either, he pretty much ignores me.
I feel as though he blames me for it since mom had gone out to get ice cream at my request. Maybe it was my fault, I didn't know anymore. I was hated by practically everyone except my sister whom my father adored. I stopped caring what my dad thought of me, I'd never be enough for him any who. Just like at school, I was hated for being smart, weak, skinny, slow. You name it and they found a reason to hate me for it. I also kept a huge secret from everyone and that was that I had a pet wolf. Yes, that's right. A wolf. It happened a year after our mother died, I wasn't far in the forest and it was sunset. Dad didn't care I was out there so whatever.
I was walking around when I heard metal snapping shut then a howl like whimper. Curiosity got the better of me as I traipsed in more then I saw it. An all black wolf with some lighter patches of fur on its sides and underside, a little on the face too and unlike most wolves who had blue or brown eyes, this one had yellow-ish green eyes. I saw it caught in a hunters trap, its leg was wounded. I moved closer as it snapped at me, I managed to calm it down as I set it free. It pounced me, I thought I was dead but it only licked my face then limped off. It had been the weirdest thing ever but I let it go and made my way out of the forest. The next day after school, I was in my room and I saw the wolf come just past the tree line. I rushed down the stairs and got a piece of raw steak from the fridge, I made my way outside and towards the edge. It backed up a little but I offered the meat and that seemed to do it. This wolf became my best friend and we met in the forest every day. I named him Toothless, no idea why it just came to me so I used it.
I still see him every day, we sit together on a small cliff enjoying the sunset then he leads me back home. I talk to him about things but it sucks he can't talk back. I've met his pack too, they weren't fond of me at first but Toothless fixed that and I learned quickly that he was the pack leader so they wouldn't go against him. So yeah, I am best friends with a wolf. People would call me crazy if they knew or maybe they wouldn't even care. I sure as heck didn't know. I looked out the bus window after 10 minutes and realized we were almost to mine and Heather's stop. I got my book bag as the bus stopped and we got off, she rushed to the door to get inside as I only walked slow. I saw my father's car there, great. Entering the house, it began.
"Hi daddy." Heather beamed hugged our father, Stoick Haddock the chief of police.
"Hey princess." He smiled then faced me as I walked into the kitchen. "Hello, Hiccup." As usual, I'm greeted with the tone of more or less 'why the hell do I let you stay here again'. I shrugged it off.
"Hey dad..." I reply.
"You didn't do the dishes this morning." Stoick said to me.
"I'm sorry...I stayed up late finishing homework, then overslept...I didn't get a chance too..." I said lowly with my head down. It was always like this. I was the black sheep of the family, everything was my job to do. Dishes, laundry, sweeping, mopping, dusting, cooking even...I hated it but what could I do? Get yelled at like always, it was easier to just do the work and avoid the argument. My father hated me, people at school hated me. Why the hell did my father keep me around anymore? He'd be better off without me. I guess if I had to guess, I stayed for Heather's sake. She cared, so did Toothless. I was almost 18, I just had to graduate, get a job, and save money. Then I could leave.
"Best get to your homework now then so you don't forget tomorrow." Stoick retorted. I nod and make my way to my bedroom, I toss my bag on the bed and plop down sighing. After a minute I started with my homework. I didn't have a lot and it was all fairly easy to me. I kept straight A's, anything less and I'm sure my father my scold me for such a bad grade. When my homework was done at 4pm, I heard my father call to me he had to head out for an issue at work that I was in charge of dinner. No shocker there. I stared at my desk, my sleeve riding up where I saw my scars from cutting. I was depressed and hated life. Hated my life so much. I started cutting when I was 15, now I was 17 and still did it. It was my way of releasing the pain I felt.
I put my headphones in to listen to music, I managed to fall asleep until 4:45 when a text woke me up. I read it over, it was from dad telling me if the house wasn't spotless when he got home then I was grounded. I clenched my phone tightly until my knuckles cracked. I threw it down and grabbed my knife which was hidden between my mattress and box spring, I pulled back my sleeve and pressed the blade to my wrist. Just as I was about to drag it across to cut myself, my door opened revealing Heather. I quickly stashed the knife under my pillow and covered my wrist. "Oh Hiccup! Dad said we can order pizza for dinner, he said you gotta call and give the place his number. He sent it to me in a text. Can you call now. I'm starving!" Heather exclaimed.
"S-Sure thing, Heather. Forward it to me and I'll call okay?" I smile at her. She nodded shutting the door, I sighed. I wouldn't show her my scars or that I cut. She'd tell dad and would just make it worse, Heather cared about me so I didn't want to worry her but also with all the senseless hate centered around me...I didn't know how much longer I could deal with all this. I was utterly alone for all intensive purposes. I got my phone as her text came through with dad's credit card information, I dialed the number for the pizza place and waited for an answer. After one ring I was greeted with, 'Never Alone Crisis Hotline. Because your are never alone with us here to help. This is Angel. How can I help you this evening?' That's not the normal greeting I get from the pizza place? Did I call the wrong number? "Hello? Can I help you?' I heard again. I quickly hung up the phone and checked the number I dialed.
Yep, wrong one. I fixed the numbers I'd done wrong and called to order pizza. Only got two mediums and a 2 liter. Gave them dad's information then hung up. The food would be there in 20 minutes or so. I stared at my recent calls list, there was the pizza place then right below the number to that hotline or whatever it was. Crisis hotline? What even was that? I got my phone browser up and searched the name I was given when the girl answered. 'Never Alone Crisis Hotline' and hit search. The first thing that came up was the webpage for it. Advertising their elite group of people who helped people who felt depressed or suicidal, who felt alone and had no one to talk to or understand them.
'Huh...Weird that I was literally just feeling alone and suicidal before I called it by accident...' I thought as I ignored it and left the room. The pizza came and I signed the slip for the delivery guy, then he left. Heather and I both ate our food. I only ate two pieces and had one cup of soda before beginning the chores. I didn't want to be grounded after all. I was done around 7pm, Heather was in her room listening to music and I just finished the house. Everything was done and dad wasn't due home until 10. I sat on my bed now, again debating on cutting or not. This time I had my door shut and locked. I had my wrist exposed, knife out. But I was shaking, hesitating. I could end it all right now, be dead in the hour with one good cut. Who would care anyways.
Then as I was about to cut myself deep, something came to mind. The woman's voice who answered when I called that hotline by accident. It was gentle and sincere. It was a hotline to help people with their depression right? What harm would it do to call once and just see if they could offer me a better way than ending my life? I put my knife down and got my phone, I took a deep breath as I hovered my finger over the hotline's number a moment before closing my eyes and pressing it. I put it to my ear and waited, after two rings this time. There was a connection. "Never Alone Crisis Hotline. Because your are never alone with us here to help. This is Angel. How can I help you this evening?". I got the same girl as before? Odd. I sat in silence a second or two, I couldn't hang up on her twice. That was rude.
Might as well get right to the point of why I called this number then, my eyes fell on my wrist which had minor cuts on them. "I-I feel like no one cares about me and...I'd be better off dead...I want...to kill myself." I answer truthfully. Here we go, no going back now. I'd said it. That I wanted to kill myself. Now I had to see if this 'Angel' girl could change my mind because if she couldn't then it further proved I had nothing to live for and I would end my life tonight.