Hahaha! It is I, the most famous fanfic writer ever! *gets thrown with a can and a shout of boo*
Me : Who the fak throw the can?!
Kubo : Your fanfic sucks ! Boo...!
Me : Whatever, I owned bleach *smirk*
Ichigo : Stfu and dont claim Bleach as your authority or I getsuga tenshou your ass!
Me : Shit ! Retarded fruit is here, I do not own bleach!
Ichigo : Who you calling retarded?! *started charging getsuga*
Rukia's POV
Ahh... what a nice day to start with. Kiyone and Sentaro is not bickering since one of them is sick. Not much paperwork. No Ichigo or Renji to yell and mess up my hair. This day could be nice. Eh? Crap. Forgot to give Ukitake Taichou his medicine! I hope he is still in his office...
"Ukitake taichou, may I come in?" I asked, wondering if he is still asleep.
"Oh Rukia chan. Come in." I then entered with his medicine in my hand. Which I forgot to hide. Crap. He sees it.
"Aww. Nasty medicines... Oh wait, I have a favour to ask you. If you do it ill eat the medicine." A favour?
"Of course Ukitake taichou. What is it?"
"I want you to give this box to Shiro chan. Becareful, it is quite heavy and fragile." Shiro chan? Who is Shiro chan?
"I can handle that. But who is Shiro chan if I may ask?"
"Oh, he is the 10th Division Taichou Toushiro Hitsugaya. Please be very careful with this box. I wanted it delivered in perfect shape." Now this is getting fishy... Why must it be jn a perfect shape? Nah who cares.
"Okay. But what is it inside this box that you are very concerned about taichou?" Great, so much for 'Nah who cares'.
"Secret. You will find out there. Anyways, here I go!" Ukitake taichou then drank the luquid and instantly went mad. He started singing nonsense. And this is my cue to leave. Goddamn this box is heavy. Good thing that 10th Division is two divisions away.
A few minutes later...
Ah... finally here. Damn box wont let me use shunpo. At least my work is done.
"Hello, Hitsugaya taichou, are you there? Im Rukia Kuchiki from 13th Division and I have a package from Ukitake taichou. He says that it is really important." The door then opened and I see Hitsugaya taichou with his bagged eyes. He mustve been staying up all night doing paperworks. Damn, he looks so young to get father standard job.
"Hn... come in." I placed the box neatly on his office table but the rope that kept the box sealed is loose and it unfolded. What is inside it is very worth of my each moment to carry it! It is a blood red juicy watermelon carved into Chappy the Rabbit! Who knows that Hitsugaya taichou is into Chappy! Yay im not the only one who loved Chappy the Rabbit!
"Ah.. my favourite fruit. Gimme gimme!" Hitsugaya taichou tried to pull the head off! Nooo this is so cruel! On my instinct I slapped his hand. I then realized, I fucking slapped a taichou for eating a carved fruit! Im in so much trouble!
"Oops. Sorry Hitsugaya taichou! I overreacted to see you tried to pull this carving's head off. Im so sorry!" I apologised while bowing at him, I hope he doesnt get mad. If he does goodbye cruel world.
"Whatever, now if you excuse me..." He is trying to pull its head off again! How dare he! I gathered all my strength into another slap and landed it on his hand. He flinched a bit and rubbed his hand. I instinctively spread my arms out protectively infront of the poor carving.
"How dare you for trying to stop me from eating!" He then pounced me and we kept pushing each others with force. I held his hand in mine trying to push him away from Chappymelon. But I am the one who is being pushed! Shit. He is so strong!
"Get out of the way!" Hitsugaya taichou yelled and flipped ontop of me. But that results in something else...My dear Chappymelon is falling from our struggle! Nooo!
"Ahh fuck! I got it." I yelled as I stretched my arms.
"No I got it!" Hitsugaya taichou yelled and did the same. But in the end, we over jumped and had the carving splattered on both of our faces. It is an awkward silent. After processing what the fuck just happened we both screamed. "NOOOOOO !"
"It is your fault that ChappyMelon splattered!"
"Hey! Why me, you are the one who started this Kuchiki!" We then hand locked each other and started fighting again. He is lucky I left Shirayuki home. He is so strong that I fell backwards. He is now ontop of me, pinning my arms. The door suddenly slided open and revealed Matsumoto fukutaichou.
"Taichou! Can I go to drink sake with Abarai? I want to- ohohoho... taichou, I did not know you had it in you..." She said, grinning like Gin.
"Had what in me Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya taichou asked his fukutaichou. I also didn't understand what she is talking about.
"You are interested with Kuchiki huh taichou?" Matsumoto asked. But what is it that Hitsugaya taichou interested in me?
"Huh? Interested with Kuchiki. I didnt see anything interesting. " Hitsugaya taichou said as he lowered his face from my face to my chest, my waist and then my legs. Examining as he does that. I felt uneasy when he acted like that. Matsumoto fukutaichou then facepalmed.
"Nevermind, I forgot you two are not exposed to this kind of stuff. To innocent. Anyways, what is it with you guys in the position with watermelon splattered on your heads?"
"Hmph. Kuchiki made this mess." Now he is blaming me?! It is his own fault! It is impossible to revive ChappyMelon!
"Why the hell are you blaming me?! You killed ChappyMelon!"
"It is your fault that now this so called ChappyMelon is inedible!" He is so cruel! He thinks about eating ChappyMelon!
"Ah get off me you jerk!" I then pushed Hitsugaya taichou off me and ran out of his division. Stupid taichou short white haired Chappy murderer.
Toushiro's POV
What the fuck is wrong with her, all I wanted to do is eat that fruit and she named it ChappyMelon and started protecting it. Maybe she is obsessed with this Chappy.
"Ne taichou, what is it with Kuchiki? You tried to force her to have sex with you?" Matsumoto asked with her stupid ass face. And what the fuck does she mean with forcing Kuchiki to have sex with me? Im a guy and she is a girl. Sex means gender. Stupid Matsumoto. Is she that dumb to not understand what is sex?
"Oi Matsumoto, why would I force her to change into a male?" She then face palmed and it is harder than before.
"Nevermind taichou... anyways, about that sake..." Great... she is going to be drinking again...
"No, try to get those last 30 paperworks and I will let you drink sake till evening."
"Really?! Ok taichou!" She then started filling the paperwork with godlike speed and ran off. And suprisingly it is done neatly and correctly! What the fuck?! Who knows she can be like that? Ahh who cares. I got this sudden guilt feeling for Kuchiki... I need to make up for her.
Now those paperwork is done by Matsumoto, lets see if I can find any this called Chappy here in Seireitei... Oh wait, Chappy did not exist here. I need to go to the Living World! Shit, women will try to smother me with their hugs.
Some while after...
Ah finally, a toy shop. ToySRus, what a weird name for a store. Lets see, whoa! There is hundreds of this called Chappy! So many... bunny.
"Oh hello there, you need any help young man?" Ahh finally! Respect! I am not called a kid!
"Im trying to find the hugest so called Chappy for this girl. Is there any?"
"You got a girlfriend already? My my... nevermind what I just said. The biggest Chappy is over here. Follow me." What is wrong with humans? I got a girlfriend. Hinamori is my first girlfriend. And the first friend too. Is it really that weird?
I followed the lady and the Chappy doll is damn big. And it can speak too. And only for 300 dollar. Not that expensive. And she is making the What The Fuck face when I paid for the doll. Maybe human world thinks that bringing 300 dollars is weird. Nah nevermind, time to meet Kuchiki.
Meanwhile...
Rukia's POV
Hmm... should I apologize to Hitsugaya taichou? After all that Chappy Melon is for him. Why do I feel guilty! Crap, I need to find a watermelon fast. I dont want to disappoint Nii sama if Hitsugaya taichou punished me.
Now where is thay melon store... oh there it is. Aww. All this watermelons is so small. I need a gigantic melon.
"Oh a Kuchiki is here! Welcome to my humble store, what brings you here to a street of Rukongai?"
"I need a watermelon, and a big one too. Do you have any? It is for this boy I want to give." I asked politely. I hope he has any.
"Wow, you have a boyfriend already? Oops, nevermind what I said, and about the melon, it is here, I have one, it is a size of a Hollow's mask." What is wrong with having boyfriends? Ichigo, Renji, Ishida and Sado is my boyfriend. Ah who cares bout that. Hitsugaya taichou is my first priority here.
"Oh thank you, how much do you want for it?"
"Only 45 gold coins will do." I paid for the melon and carried it. Goddamn heavy! Time to see Hitsugaya taichou. Maybe he is in his office.
Somewhile after a very long way to bring a melon to a field and shunpo back to 10th Division...
God, finally im here!
"Hitsugaya taichou, may I come in?" I asked nervously, I hope he opens the door. I need to get this guilt out of my chest... The door then slided open.
"Oh Kuchiki, I wanted to see you anyways. Follow me." I followed him until we arrived at a field. He still doesnt notice I have a melon hidden there! Whew close call.
"Wait here, im gonna go fetch something." After that he shunpoed away. And came back with a gigantic Chappy behind him.
"Um... Kuchiki, im sorry for destroying that so called Chappy, so I bought this to make it up for you. And it talks too if you bent its ears." He then bent the Chappy's ears and it said 'Im Chappy, and I love warm hugs.' It is so cute!
"Ttt-thank you taichou..." I stuttered as I take the Chappy from him. And then I remembered about the melon.
"Hey taichou, go check behind those bushes." He then walked to the bush and pushed them aside. He carried the melon with ease! He is so strong!
"Wow, thank you Kuchiki, this watermelon is huge!" He said happily and smiled. He is so cute when he smiled... but suddenly out of nowhere Matsumoto fukutaichou came.
"Ohohoho! Look at you two... you both match perfectly. Im gonna start ToshiRuki fan club now!"
"Fanclub?" Hitsugaya taichou asked.
"ToshiRuki?" I am so confused. This new words is just weird.
Matsumoto then facepalmed so hard that it left a mark. "You guys are together right? As boyfriend and girlfriend. So it means Toshiro plus Rukia equal to ToshiRuki."
"Yeah, she is my girlfriend. It means a friend that her sex is girl."
"You both are too innocent... But who cares, Im telling everyone you guys are an Item!" Matsumoto then left.
"An Item?" We both said at the same time. Confused. But we shrugged it of and started eating the melon together. Who knows that by splattering a fruit makes a very grumpy person smile? Thank you ChappyMelon! I have a new boyfriend now.
The End.
Yup, it is done. Finally! 2 hours of brain storming plus stupidity. I hope you liked it. Haha, by the way, I know it is really good. I love ToshiRuki.
Toshiro and Rukia : Will you tell us what is it with ToshiRuki PurpleStrawberry?
Me : Secret...