After the end of episode 5:16, Gilmore Girls 'So...Good Talk'
I own no rights to Gilmore Girls or the characters. They belong to Amy Sherman-Palladio and WB.
Ok, I don't like unexplained gaps.
At the end of episode 5:16 after weeks apart, Luke rushes into Lorelai's house and they kiss. The next scene (episode 5:17) shows Kirk collecting the blue and pink ribbons. Now, we all know there was a conversation between L&L about how and why he suddenly showed up at her door after weeks apart. Here is my version of this conversation
Luke woke to see Lorelai standing at the window, staring out of it, motionless, wearing nothing but his shirt. It was not even 6 AM and Lorelai was not known for her early rising without the aid of a very noisy alarm clock or at least one that purred.
"Morning. Why are you awake so early and watcha looking at?" Luke asked, with just a hint of concern in his voice.
She turned to look at him and answered "Nothing." but uncharacteristically she remained by the window.
"Come back to bed, it's cold." he told her, patting the empty side of the bed that she had vacated.
"You know you really need to get over your thing with cold, it's nice sometimes." she replied.
He thought about how he would like her to come back to bed and let him warm her up, but knew by the tone of her voice that it was not the thing to say right now.
"Lorelai, what's wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm fine." She smiled but the smile did not reach her eyes, which looked slightly sad and confused.
"Lorelai." The way he said her name told her he was not going to let this drop.
"I'm just thinking, confused, trying to figure all this out." She motioned with her hands, waving them back and forth between them.
"What exactly are you trying to figure out, Lorelai?" He asked with a slightly worried look on his face.
"You. Me. Or I guess I should say you AND me. What's going on, where do we stand? I have been completely undone the last few weeks since that night at my parents vow renewal and that awful scene with Christopher and I was just getting to the place where I thought I might at least start to be OK sometime in the foreseeable future. And I don't know where we stand now. Are we back together? Completely? Partially? I can't stand this not knowing where I stand with you, this unknown in my life with us. At least when we were broken up, I knew where I stood, even though I hated every minute of it" As she talked her words had become faster than usual and by the time she finished, they ended up sounding almost frantic. She took a deep breath. "Do you remember what you told me on our first date?" she asked.
"There were several things discussed, as I remember. AND I hope you know that I would not be here at all if I wasn't planning on staying. And I don't mean just for today." Luke replied.
Lorelai looked at him with her incredible sapphire eyes and said "You said that last time, you told me you were in. You were all in. And I believed you, with all my heart. I had no reason not to. For the last 8 years, you have ALWAYS been the one steady presence in my life, the one person I knew I could count on, no matter what. And then four months after our first date, you were just gone. My best friend, the person I look forward to seeing and talking to everyday, to feed me and give me coffee, the one I count on to help me through the bumps and knocks that life throws at me, to share the the good things and even not so good things in my life, wasn't there. You have no idea how many times I just wanted to come see you and tell you about some crazy thing that happened at the Inn and to hear about your day or the latest thing Taylor has done to drive you nuts or if you had thrown a frying pan at his head" Her eyes filled with tears. "And it HURT. It hurt more than I thought was possible. More than anything has ever hurt me before in my life"
Luke jumped out of bed, ran to where she stood by the window and wrapped his arms around her. Seeing her in pain was more than he could stand.
"God, Lorelai, I'm so sorry. Everything was just so screwed up and I know I didn't handle it the right way. I hope you know I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you, and no matter what is going on with us, you can ALWAYS talk to me. ALWAYS. We've been best friends for 8 years and that won't ever change." Luke said.
Lorelei looked up into his eyes, so filled with concern and continued "And then last night, you just showed up at my door with no warning or explanation and started kissing me and we ended up here. There was no discussion, we didn't even talk about all the awful things that have gone on over the last few weeks."
"Ok, so let's talk about it now" Luke said.
She looked away as tears rolled down her cheeks. "Luke, the last few weeks it's like I've been stuck in a long, dark tunnel. I couldn't see the end of it. I knew I would eventually find it, but I couldn't see it. I've NEVER been in that place before. It was frightening and painful and I was all alone and I couldn't escape it. I tried to fill my life with work, but it didn't help the pain. You broke my heart, Luke. You broke it in a way I didn't even know was possible. I've been through break ups before but nothing like this. It was an actual physical pain that was unbearable. I had never felt like that before in my life and I don't even know what THAT means. It didn't hurt this badly when I broke off my engagement to Max. I didn't lie in bed and cry for days that time. Why did it hurt so MUCH this time? I couldn't stand the pain, but I had no choice but to just get through it, alone. And the worst part was, I didn't even have my best friend to talk to and help me through it."
Her words cut him to the quick.
"Lorelai, please believe me, I'm so sorry. I know I should have handled that whole thing that happened with Christopher at your parents wedding better and I wish I could go back and change it. I was so angry and I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't know how to deal with the things Christopher was saying. I can't stand that guy and I really hate that he is in your life in any way. What can I do to make this better?" Luke asked
"I don't know" she replied quietly "This, right here, us, being together again in the same room, is all I've thought about, hoped for, over the last few weeks and now that you're here, I'm really frightened of even trusting it again, but I don't know how to live without it. I can't live without you in my life and THAT scares me. And you have to accept Christopher will always be in my life to soome extent. He is Rory's father. I can't change that, no matter how inconvenient it is to you." She took a deep breath. "I guess it will just take time."
"Lorelai, look at me." Luke asked softly.
She hesitated and he put his hand under her chin and gently turned her face towards his. Seeing her face covered in tears, broke his heart. He knew he was responsible for it and he was the only one who could fix it. He had to fix it.
"I'm all in, I promise you." Luke said "The last few weeks have been pretty miserable for me also."
"But you said that before and then you bailed on me the first time we hit a bump in the road. That's not how a relationship is supposed to work." Lorelai replied. She was quiet for a few seconds, then asked him "Why did you suddenly change your mind, after weeks of us being apart? Why did you show up at my door last night?"
"Emily" he replied.
"Emily Gilmore? My mother, Emily Gilmore, she's the one who changed your mind? About you and me?" she asked him astounded. Because her mother hated the idea of her being with Luke and was directly responsible for the whole fiasco that lead to their breakup.
"How many other Emilys do you know?" he asked.
He told her how Emily had showed up at the diner unexpectedly the night before and told her about the whole conversation. He didn't want to leave out one word. Especially the part about her mother staying out of their relationship from now on.
"Lorelai, I love you. Not having you in my life is not even a possibility. That is one thing I've learned for certain over the last couple of weeks. My life isn't even real to me without you in it." He leaned in and kissed her. A short, tender kiss.
Her eyes widened in surprise. "Really? You love me?" she asked.
"Yes, I really do, I've loved you for a very long time, even before we were 'officially' together. How could you not know that?" He pulled her to him and he kissed her again, this time longer, with more passion. She felt the heat rise inside her instantly and let out a long sigh.
"Luke, no. Talk, don't distract. You kissing me is very distracting and it will lead to other things NOT involving talking being done, which normally, I wouldn't mind at all but we have never had any problems with that part of our relationship. And how could I know you loved me? You've never said that to me before. Ever." Lorelai's eyes welled up with tears again and she looked away, she didn't want him to see her crying.
"You wearing nothing but my shirt is the very definition of distracting." Luke said softly. "I thought you knew, by my actions, that I loved you. I'm sorry, I never told you, but you know I'm an action type of guy and you are the words person in this relationship. I thought my actions said it. I won't make that mistake again."
She looked up at him, smiling slightly at his words and said "That is something that is very important for me to hear at least every now and then. Despite my many amazing and wonderful qualities, I'm not a mind reader.", she teased him. She broke into a full out smile. That smile that could melt his heart. He wondered for just a moment if she had any idea what effect it had on him.
"Hey, Luke?"
"What."
"I love you, too"
He kissed her again in a way that told her immediately where this was headed if it continued for even a few more seconds.
"Luke, we're both going to be late for work if you don't stop that now" she teased.
"Since we both own our businesses and are therefore the 'boss' at our places of employment, I think we can get away with it just this once." He said softly.
"Just once? Are you tired of me already?" She asked in a fake Southern accent.
"Not even close. Not now or ever" he whispered in her ear, then left a trail of soft kisses down her neck, utilizing every thing he knew that drove her crazy.
"How do you do that? How do you know so well, every trick to drive me nuts?" Lorelai asked.
"Are you kidding? I've watched every emotion you feel cross your face for 8 years. It's not that difficult, Lorelai, I just pay attention. Sometimes, I know what you are feeling before you do. Mainly, I think, because you don't slow down long enough to process things. But I love that about you, your ability to rush headlong into life so fearlessly. How can you not know that by now?"
She looked at him, amazed. Every thought of work, her life, anything but the man standing in front of her left her mind. How had she ignored it for so long? Maybe she did need to start paying more attention.
"Well, add caffeine to genetics and you have the perfect storm."
"Lorelai, shhhhh." And he kissed her to enforce the silence.