Welcome to my Supermansion story, and the very first Supermansion story to be posted on Fanfiction. If you have not seen Supermansion, I highly recommend you watch it, not only will you know that characters, the show is hilarious. The main character is voiced by Bryan Cranston. If you decide to read this first then fair warning, MAJOR spoilers ahead. A big thank you to Just Q, who came with the name of this story.
Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.
Supermansion Unlimited
Within Storm City stood the Supermansion. Built by the United States government, it served as the home and base of operation for the League of Freedom. A team of superheroes who have been protecting the world since World War 2. The heroes were currently facing a challenge greater than any super villain, trying to get more funding.
"Come on Steve Jobs!" Rex yelled into the phone. "The League of Freedom has been protecting this country since before they invented regular cell phones. Oh I don't know, how about since if it wasn't for me and my team, you never would have had a chance to make your first iPhone. Because the world would have been destroyed. Now I don't think showing a little appreciation by sponsoring the League would hurt. What!? FINE! I am gonna get one of those phones that catch fire when someone calls, stick in down your pants and then call it!" With that he hung up and muttered, "asshole."
"We're back." Lex and Robobot entered the kitchen, the latter was wearing his suit and wig.
"How'd it go?" Rex asked.
"Not great." Lex replied.
"We met with the CEO of Empire Enterprises." Robobot began. "We spoke of all the good the League has done since it was founded and how he could help ensure the futures safety by becoming a sponsor."
"And what did he say?" Rex asked.
"He said that my costume would look better on his office floor." Lex said bluntly, "then asked if my titanium hand vibrated."
"What!?" Her father snapped.
"Lex then proceed to bend his arm 90 degrees in the wrong direction." Robobot explained. "Then punch him in the testicles with his own fist."
"Attagirl," Rex smiled.
"Thanks Dad. Anyway he won't sue us, but hes not gooing to sponsor us either." Lex explained.
"Damn." Rex then saw American Ranger and Portia walk in. "Did you two have any luck?"
"Afraid not." Ranger shook his head. "Turns out a lot of the offices I went to no longer exist and the one that did had become some kind of abomination called a vegan restaurant."
"I reached out to all the contacts I had." Portia said. "But none of them were interested."
"What about Brad and Cooch?" Lex asked. "Did they have any luck with that ad executive?"
"No. I got a call from Brad a few minutes ago." Rex sighed. "The mans dog was brought in and Cooch panicked, clawing up a lot of the office. Brads getting her released from the pound now."
"Why did you send Cooch again?" Robobot asked.
Rex shrugged, "the guy loves animals."
"I'm sorry I can't help more Rex, but I don't have that kind of money to support this team." Portia said.
"No need to apologise Portia." Ranger raised his hand. "After all you have a child to take care of."
"What?" Portia blinked. "I don't have a kid."
"Hey Portia!" Courtney ran in. "I just saw this totally sweet segway online with flames and lightning bolts painted on it. Can have $400?"
"You were saying?" Ranger asked bluntly.
"Hey Rex!" Black Saturn walked in holding a cell phone. "I've been on hold for the past three hours! Is this Hans Lichtenstein that important?"
Portia raised an eyebrow, "who?"
"Hans Lichtenstein is an extremely wealthy industrialist from Germany." Rex explained before placing a hand on Saturn's shoulder. "Who loves superheroes and happens to be a big Black Saturn fan."
"Your right Rex," Saturn smiled. "I got this!" With that he walked away. "Yes, I'll hold."
"Wait up bro!" Courtney went after him. "I wanna show you this sweet segway."
"Germans Rex!" Ranger snapped. "Are we THAT desperate?"
"Ranger, there is no Hans Lichtenstein." Rex said.
"Its just a trick to distract Saturn so he wouldn't call any actual people and totally f*** up any chance we have of getting funding." Lex explained.
"Then who is he actually calling?" Portia asked.
"An automated program that plays classical music and repeats the same three phrases every twenty minutes." Robobot explained.
"So whats the plan now?" Ranger asked.
"Now, your all shit out of luck." Sgt Agony entered the kitchen.
"Agony!" Rex snapped. "You know we have a God damn doorbell!"
"I know. Its broken" Agony said blankly. "But more importantly, I wanted to introduce my new boss." A woman in her fifties walked in. "Madison Shepard. The new head of Financial Approval For Government Spending."
Ranger narrowed his eyes. "That sounds made up."
"Ms Shepard, meet Titanium Rex, founder and leader of the League of Freedom." Agony began introductions. "Rex, meet the woman who holds the future of your team in the palm of her hand."
"Nice to meet you." Rex shook her hand.
"We've actually met before." She smiled.
"We have?" Rex asked.
"Yes, about thirty years ago." Her smile turned into a frown. "When you said you'd call me."
"Uh oh," Rex gulped.
"Well, we're boned." Robobot said.
"Oh don't worry," she assured him. "Sure at first I wanted to take a flaming chainsaw to that potato dick of yours. But I've moved on from that."
"This does not bode well." Portia said.
"Anyway, I've bin reviewing the performance of the League of Freedom for the past few years." Madison narrowed her eyes at Rex. "And I have come to a final decision about your funding." The entire team braced themselves while Agony smirked. "The Leagues funding," she suddenly smiled, "will be doubled."
"What!?" The League gasped.
"WHAT!?" Agony gasped even louder.
"The League may be a group of mismatched misfits, with a couple of jackasses thrown in there. But I truly believe that when the world needs them, the League has always stood up and saved us." Madison explained. "For that reason I am doubling you funding."
The heroes began cheering and hugging each other. "Thank you!" Rex couldn't be happier. "Madison I could kiss you!"
"Buy me a drink first." She winked, but then said. "Seriously, I want that dinner you promised me."
"I can do that." Rex nodded.
"You can't be serious!" Agony exclaimed. "I thought you were gonna cut off their funding, not give them more."
"Shut it Agony!" Ms Shepard snapped before addressing the heroes. "There is a condition. You need to expand."
Rex raised an eyebrow. "Expand?"
"This is a god damn mansion!" Madison threw her arms out. "There are only eight of you living here. Nine if you count that idiot man child Ms Jones is dating." She looked to Portia, "Big fan by the way, love your show."
"Thank you." Portia smiled.
"You have to increase the League of Freedoms roster and recruit new members." Madison clarified. "Do this and you'll get the extra funding." She handed Rex a card. "Heres my number and you better call this time or I will break out the flaming chainsaw."
"Got it." Rex nodded.
"Then I'll leave you to it." Madison headed for the door. "Maybe try and get an alien on the team. That would be something." With that she left, a furious Sgt Agony following.
"Wow," Lex smiled. "I don't think that could have gone any better."
"Especially considering genitals were threatened wit h a flaming chainsaw." Robobot added.
"We're back," Cooch and Brad walked in, the former drinking from a large cup. "We stopped for shlushies."
"Agony looked pissed." Brad observed. "What did we miss."
"Our funding has been doubled!" Ranger announced.
"Awesome!" The cat cheered. "Lets buy dune buggies!"
"We're not getting dune buggies." Rex snapped.
"Hey Rex!" Saturn ran in. "I got through to Lichtenstein!"
"How is that possible?" Lex whispered to Robobot.
"I have no idea." He shook his head.
"This is your lucky day, cause this is Black Saturn calling. Yes I'm over eighteen." Saturn smirked while giving everyone a thumbs up. "You kidding? I wear leather everyday. Do I use toys? All the time." Everyone else's eyes widened. "Is there such a thing as too big?" Rex grabbed the phone and crushed it. "What the hell Rex!?"
"We don't need Lichtenstein anymore Saturn." The Subtopian told him. "Our funding has been doubled."
"Provided we recruit more members." Robobot added.
"We just need to get the word out." Portia put her hands on her hips, "and I know just how to do it." Suddenly there was a knock at the door.
"Does anyone find it strange that we all came to the door?" Robobot asked as the entire team had come.
Rex opened the door to see a familiar face. "Ivan Whiff?"
"Hello Rex," Ivan smiled, but raised an eyebrow when he saw the entire League, "and everyone else."
"What are you doing here?" Ranger asked.
"Look we talked about this," Saturn spoke up, "Its cool you want me for your team but-"
"NO!" Ivan shouted. "I don't want to recruit you! I have never wanted you to join me! Get that through your f***ing skull!"
"Oh," Saturn blinked before crossing his arms. "Doesn't matter, I got the League of Freedom. Right guys?" No one answered, "guys?"
"I'm here because a little birdie told me League of Freedom was losing funding." Ivan smirked.
"Let me guess, a little bird named Agony?" Lex spoke up. "Its cute you guys still hang out after your plan to tick me into joining your team so he could get the League shut down failed."
"Ah yes, a poor decision on my part." Whiff chuckled. "But I'm here to make amends. I am willing sponsor the League."
"Is that right?" Rex asked sceptically.
"As the head of Whiff Incorporated, I am a billionaire." Ivan smirked. "Of course, I would expect a sign of gratitude for all my help."
"Let me guess," Portia put her hands on her hips, "joining the League.
"Naturally." Whiff nodded, "I think, second in command would suffice. After all with all the money-"
"Too late." Rex cut him off.
Whiff blinked, "what?"
"Our budgets been doubled." The subtopian grinned. "Our funding troubles are officially over."
"I, are you serious!?" Ivan spluttered.
"Yeah," Lex nodded, "happened like five minutes ago."
Whiff was in shock. "But I, I got here early and was knew Sgt Agony coming. Are you saying I just missed my window!?"
"Probably." Cooch shrugged. "See ya." With that she slammed the door in his face.
"GAH! MY NOSE!" Whiff could be heard yelling.
"Well, that was satisfying." Rex smiled. "Portia, you said you had an idea?"
The next day on A Talk in the Clouds
"Before we finish the show today, I have big news." Portia began. " Isn't that right Rex?" She gestured upwards as Rex flew down onto the stage.
"That's right Portia." Rex smiled before looking out at the crowd. "Hello everyone. For more than seven decades, the League of Freedom has been protecting this country and the world from anyone or anything that wished us harm. But in these times of super villains, alien invasions and evil robots-"
"We're not all evil." Robobot called out from off stage.
Rex rolled his eyes and continued. "The point is that when the threats grow stronger, so must the forces that face them. That is why the League of Freedom will be recruiting new members."
"Whether your from another planet, got powers from a lab accident or discovered a magic artifact," Portia tapped the jewel around her neck.
"If you have the courage and dedication to fight for justice, then the League Of Freedom wants you!" Rex pointed at the camera with his titanium hand.
"Just download the application form the website at the bottom of the screen," a website address appeared, "it'll help you create a resume that you can send directly to the Mansion where it will be examined by League members." Portia explained.
"We'll contact you with a time and a date for you to come in and try out. If we feel you've got the right stuff, then your in." Rex said. Portia nudged him. "Oh right. I'm legally required to say that among the refreshments served, there will be a gluten free option for anyone who is celiac. If you are not celiac but are still avoiding gluten, then there is another option. Grow the f*** up!"
"And that all the time we have." Portia cut in. "See you next week everybody." She waved as the music played them out. "Did you have to insult people like that?" Portia asked.
"Someone had to." Rex replied.
Portia placed her hands on her hips. "You know that's gonna cost you some potential members right?"
"Portia, they could control time, but if they whined about gluten for no reason, its not worth it." Rex said.
The following chapters will each have a different hero audition for the League of Freedom. I am excluding characters from DC and Marvel. This story is set in AU to the show so that I can use certain characters. But once again I highly recommend watching all three seasons of Supermansion.