Cullens On Jerry Springer

by ShanteRenee

Have you ever thought about it? The Cullens are a pretty mixed up family! From Best friends sleeping with your child to werewolves and vampires! Yes, you heard it right, folks, this is a Jerry Springer EXCLUSIVE! We have tons of new episodes this season!

1. I don't love my girlfriend

**ON AIR**

This show was brought to you in part by ISABELLCLAIR. She kinda inspired this "show". =]

Episode one: 'I don't love my girlfriend anymore'

Stephanie Meyer: I own everything. I run the show. =P

Shante: Hey everyone. My name's Shante, and I'm the producer of the newest tv series, 'The Cullens on Jerry Springer'! Please be advised: This show may not be suitable for the younger viewers. Parental advisory is suggested.

Jerry Springer: Welcome! On Today's episode, it is going to be interesting. A few weeks ago, I got a phone call from a very disgruntled young man. He claims that he's been lying to his girlfriend about 8 months. He wants to come clean now. Let's bring him out. Come on out, Mike!

[Mike Newton walks on stage]

Crowd: Booooooooooooooooooooooooo

Mike: Erm. Hi.

Jerry: Mike, now, why don't you tell us what's going on here exactly.

Mike: Well…my girlfriend, Jessica…she's not the one for me.

Crowd: *gasp*

Jerry: What do you mean? Don't you love her?

Mike: No! I'm in love with…

Crowd: *on the edge of their seats*

Jerry: With?

Mike: [shouting like a mad man] Isabella Swan!

Crowd: *EE GASP!*

[Jessica Stanley runs onto stage]

Jessica: I KNEW it!! YOU CREEP! *Slaps him*

Mike: I'm not sorry, ethier! You'll never be as…amazing as Bella!

[Edward Cullen is suddenly on stage]

Jerry: Who is this guy? Security!

Crowd: Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Shante: Why does the crowd always call his name out? I don't get it….

Edward: You will be sorry!

Mike: I'm not afraid of you, Edward Cullen! Isabella wants ME. She's always wanted me!

Jessica: *Slaps him again, as security comes up and grabs her.* WTF is *bleep*ing wrong with you, you *bleep* *bleep*hole!!? Can't you see Edward is, like, a gazillion times more amazing than YOU!

Mike: Wait, what?

Edward: [Stops glaring at Mike, and stares at Jessica] What?

Jessica: Opps. *Stops struggling with security, and runs off stage*

Jerry: Erm…we will be right back after these commercials!

**Off Air**

I'm having alot of fun writing this. This is just going to be a way to get out of my writers blocks that i have. I will probably be posting new skits like every week. I have a ton of them in my head! I hope you guys like this. I KNOW its kinda corny, but hey, I enjoy writing it! As stated above, Smeyer owns everything! Each 'SKIT' will pick up where the last one left off, when the commercials are done. haha!