Note: I don't own Plastic Man. Bummer.
Plastic Man: The Rubber Man of Mystery.
"If I ever live to tell the tale, I swear I'll be rich." Plastic Man was perched high above the streets of Gotham, looking through those ever impressive goggles of his. "I wonder if I should see what Offspring's up to. Probably being the Titans pogo stick. Oh, what fun. Maybe I could go to Woozy's and watch T.V. He stalked up his fridge, so maybe I could get free grub. Or, I could do some ever impressive……. GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY!!!!!!!"
In an alley beneath him, a woman was being mugged by a masked goon. Now. Now was the time to strike. With the native protector out of town, he had to do something.
"Look, lady. If you just give me the purse, we could both get on with our night. It's simple. I point a gun. You give me the purse. I leave, all is well."
" Just leave me alone!! Don't hurt me!!"
"Lady, I don't wanna hurt you. Just give me the purse, and you won't get hurt. It's simple."
Plas swooped down quietly behind the thug. He rehearsed this a dozen times in the watchtower, when he wasn't around. He practiced a dozen more times at Woozy Winks. Good times.
" Freeze, scum. Before you get a patented can of whoop tooshie upon you."
" Oh my god……. Your…….. red?"
'D'oh! I forgot that I couldn't change color all that well. Time to change tactics.'
" Your time has come, evil doer. For I am ……. RED BATMAN!!!!!!!!!!"
"Yeah right. Beat it, 'fore I unload a can of 'whoop tooshie' on you."
Plas stretched his "cape" and charged the assailant. Now was the time for action. Now was the time for Plastic Man.
"Stop. I.. I'll shoot!!!!!"
" You don't wanna do that, Spud."
The thug shot, barely missing Plastic Man. Well, most of them did, anyway.
" AHH!!!! YOU SHOT ME IN THE KNEE!!!!!!!"
"JEEZ!!! I TOLD YOU NOT TO SHOOT. NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!!!"
Satisfied with a job well done, Plas changed from Batman to his normal form. He wrapped his pinky around the thug, transforming his legs to springs.
" Don't worry ma'am! I shall take this lowlife down to jail. You are safe now. Go on home, purty lady. And let's not tell the Dark Knight, 'kay?"
" O…kay…"
He leapt into the air. The lady was just standing there in awe.
" What just happened?"