This one-shot is a companion piece to Chapter 11 of Finlaure13's "To Seek The Next Handhold (A Season Seven)". It picks up right where the chapter leaves off and she has given it her blessing.
This is my second foray into the world of fan fiction and I hope it does the fandom, the characters and Finlaure13's original story justice. I hope you all enjoy and if you feel the urge to review or even PM, please don't hesitate! Feedback of all kinds is welcome and appreciated. That said, please be gentle. ;o)
Huge thanks to Finlaure13 for all her encouragement and oh so subtle reminders, LOL! This one's for you, dearie.
Oh, and I most definitely don't own Covert Affairs or make any profit in any way. We'd still be watching the further Walkerson adventures on all of our TVs if I did!
*~M~*
As they stepped out onto the verandah, Auggie took a long, cleansing breath of fresh air and mused that they would be doing this – enjoying the fresh air, sunrises and sunsets – on their own porch at their own home together many more times in the years to come. He heard the swish and snap of Annie shaking out the blanket and laying it out on the deck. She knelt down, taking Auggie's hand and guiding him around to sit next to her. As he started pulling their sparse meal from the small cooler Annie had brought, Annie set up her iPhone to stream a soft rock station.
"Interesting station choice." Auggie commented, quirking an eyebrow.
"Just a little something relaxing. This station plays a lot of my old favorites." Replied Annie, opening a bottle of beer and touching it to the back of Auggie's hand.
"You always manage to surprise me, Walker." He quipped with a chuckle, taking the proffered beer.
"I could say the same of you. Come on, I happen to know you like more than just jazz."
"Of course I do, I like a lot of different kinds of music. I just happen to like jazz the best."
"Mmm. But switching it up now and then is good. Variety keeps it interesting."
"Yeah, guess so." Auggie agreed. They ate in companionable silence for a short time, enjoying the late afternoon breeze that blew through the eaves above them. The light scent of the roses near the deck and the soft murmur of the wind in the trees created a peacefulness that neither of them experienced often. Annie watched as Auggie closed his eyes, tilted his ear towards the trees and took it all in.
"It really is beautiful here; in every way possible." Annie sighed.
"It is. We were so lucky to find this place."
"How long do you think it'll take you to really have this place mapped so you can move freely like in your apartment?"
"I honestly don't know. This is a first for me, getting used to a place that I've never actually seen before. It'll take some time but it's worth it."
"I'm sorry you have to go through so much upheaval. Wish I could make it easier for you."
"Don't. I like the challenge! I want this and everything that comes with it. I want to start this new chapter of our lives here. With you."
"I want this too, so much. Part of me still can hardly believe this is happening."
"I feel the same way. I can't wait to move in, even though it's going to be a headache for a while."
"I'll bet it won't take you as long as you think it will. You're so good at everything."
"I appreciate the vote of confidence but it's really not as easy as you think."
"Will you show me?"
"Show you what, exactly?"
"How you do it, how you map out a room. Will you teach me how you do it?" His expression at her request was a combination of disbelief and awe. "Please?" She added, unsure if he would want to teach her. A slow grin blossomed on his face as he finished the last bite of his lunch.
"Grab the blanket." He commanded as he got to his feet and offered her his hand to pull her up to her feet as well. Unfurling his cane, he turned and headed back through the door and deposited the cooler on the kitchen island followed by Annie who placed the folded blanket and her iPhone alongside it. She left the music playing as she followed Auggie up the stairs and down the hall.
As she entered the room, he turned to her and held out his hand.
"Come here." She slid her hand into his and he pulled her around so she stood in front of him, the warmth of his chest against her back. He pressed the grip of his cane into her palm, adjusting her hold and keeping his hand over hers.
"Close your eyes and just follow my movements. Listen and feel what the cane tells you." He instructed, starting to slowly sweep the cane back and forth, moving her arm with his.
As they made their way around the room, he pointed out the difference in sound at the open doorway; how to tell how high the ceiling is and the dimensions of the room from the return of the echo and how to count steps to map out distances. Together, they went around the room several times, learning what the room looks like without seeing it.
By running their hands along the walls, they found the bare window. He explained that without light perception, as was the case for him, sometimes that's the only way to find out a window is there. Sometimes he could feel the heat from a window if it's in direct sunlight, other times he could tell by a draft if the window didn't seal as tightly as it should. He even took the time to explain how one can tell if there are things on the walls, furniture, carpets and such that absorb sound waves by whether there's an echo in the room or not and its intensity when there is.
Her brief glimpse into his world left her in awe and gave her more respect for what he dealt with on a daily basis. She was amazed at how many things he had to commit to memory. It seemed even more remarkable to her now that he made it look so easy. He paused, one hand on the door frame, as they stepped out of the room to go back downstairs.
"You did really well." He said earnestly.
"I have the best teacher." She countered, her smile evident. "I never knew so much was involved, that you can tell so much with your other senses. It really is amazing, you're amazing, especially with how easy you make it look."
"It isn't. I just do the best I can with what I have left. Sometimes it's enough, sometimes not. Sometimes you just need a working pair of eyes." A tinge of bitterness colored his words and it made Annie's heart ache for him.
"That's what you've got me for, right?" She intoned brightly, trying to lighten the mood as she started them off towards the stairs, hand in hand.
"No, I mean, you don't have to do that. I appreciate it but it's not your job, Annie."
"I know that, but I want to. I want you depend on me, heaven knows I depend on you."
"And you always can depend on me, no matter what. I just wish I didn't have to depend on you so much."
"I told you, I want you to. It's not the end of the world to need someone. In fact, some consider it a blessing to be needed." He stopped briefly and she turned back to face him, his dark eyes sparkling.
"You're the amazing one, Annie. I guess I just worry that you'll get tired of it all, of me, after a while. Let's face it, I know I'm not your average boyfriend – " Auggie started but was cut off quickly as Annie reached the bottom of the stairs and whipped around on him.
"No, you're not." She stated matter-of-factually, taking his large hands in her own smaller ones. She watched his features darken as he lowered his head slightly. "You're the most perfect fiancé a girl could ever dream of having!"
His head snapped up and it almost startled her how close he came to actually meeting her gaze before lowering it again. "You're sweet and I love you for it but we both know that isn't quite true."
She raised their entwined hands up until his hands rested on either side of her face under her own as he so often did himself. His thumbs automatically began to caress her cheeks softly.
"Auggie, it is true. You couldn't be more perfect to me. You've always been there for me in every way possible. Even when I wasn't there for you, you never wavered. You make me laugh and make me feel safe and loved. You helped me find myself again, even when I thought I couldn't ever come back, you brought me back from the edge so many times. When I'm with you, I'm home and I can find the peace in my heart that I need to balance the craziness I face everyday doing this job."
As he leaned his head down and released a ragged sigh, she could see redness around his now glassy eyes and on the tip of his nose. She met him halfway, touching their foreheads together gently.
"You give me so much, babe. Don't ever think less of yourself just because you can't see. You're so much more than any other man I've ever known." She declared with a sincerity that no one could deny, punctuating it with a slightly over-exaggerated smile that she knew he'd feel under his sensitive fingertips.
"Even Mr. Perfect McQuaid?" Breathed Auggie with an attempt at a nervous chuckle that came out more as a choked off sob.
"Ryan is a good man, but he will never measure up to the legend that is August Anderson." Annie quipped, eliciting the smile and honest laugh from him that she wanted to hear. "You have more skills and instincts for what we do than he will ever have. All he has is money to flash around."
"That's enough for most people."
"Maybe so, but not for me. I need more than that. I need you. Everything you are and everything about you. The good and the bad, I want it all. There's nothing I would change about you, nothing. I love you just the way you are. Don't ever doubt that, ok?" He swallowed hard and nodded, sliding his forehead on hers, relishing in the contact.
"I feel the same way about you, you know. After Tikrit, I didn't think I'd ever have this. I never thought I'd find someone like you." He paused, collecting his thoughts before continuing. He wanted to show her the openness that she had just shown him, there was so much that he wanted to tell her and he wanted to get it right. Her hands left his and came to rest on either side of his face, mirroring his own on hers, her thumb brushing a lone tear away. Her way of letting him know he had her full attention.
"You've given me so much, Annie, given me back so many things that I thought I'd lost forever. I see so much through your eyes, through your words and your millions of little touches and cues. I've catalogued them all in my heart. All those little touches and cues that clue me in on what's going on in the world around me that I can't see and make me feel like a part of it again. You let me see your reactions and emotions in ways that even I wouldn't have thought of. I don't know how you understand so much."
"I don't know, I just followed my instincts, did what felt right at the time."
"It's more than that and you know it. Don't sell yourself short either, sweetheart. You've always accepted me and never made a big deal of my disability and that means more to me than you'll ever know. Things like you wanting to learn Braille and that you wanted to learn how I move around with my cane just make me love you that much more. No one has wanted to really understand as much as you do."
He felt the tears start to wet her cheeks now and gently pulled her face closer to kiss them away. He trailed tender kisses down her cheeks until he molded his lips to hers, pouring all of himself into it, willing her to feel the love that he couldn't even begin to put into words.
"Wow." Auggie smirked as they both took much needed breaths. "Love you, Walker."
"Love you too, Augs. I so can't wait until you can't call me that anymore." Annie giggled, smiling softly as he nuzzled his cheek into her left palm so he could feel his ring on her finger.
"Me too."
"We better get going soon, it's getting late." Stated Annie, noticing the golden rays of a beautiful sunset just barely coming through the side window, casting shadows across the floor.
As they started towards the kitchen island to collect the things they'd left there after their picnic before heading upstairs, Annie noticed the song that was coming from her iPhone that they'd left playing.
"Dance with me before we go?" She whispered, taking his hand and pulling him to the center of the kitchen floor. He acquiesced, pulling her close and snaking his long arms around her tightly. Burying his face in the crook of her neck, he swayed slowly, thoroughly enjoying the moment.
I didn't know what day it was
When you walked into the room
I said hello unnoticed
You said goodbye too soon
Breezing through the clientele
Spinning yarns that were so lyrical
I really must confess right here
The attraction was purely physical
Auggie remembered the song well as one he always had liked. The lyrics reminded him of that mock party at the farm so long ago where he'd claimed to be a neurosurgeon. He'd been straining to pick out her voice among the cacophony of sound the whole time. She'd been flawless in selling her cover. He was surprised to recognize a little bit of himself in her, the same perfectionism and drive.
He'd forever associate the song now with the beginning of this new life with Annie, together in their own home. He realized he was looking forward to the future, something he hadn't done in an extremely long time. He felt his heart swell as Annie started singing along with the music, her soft alto voice in his ear blending beautifully with the singer's voice.
You're in my heart, you're in my soul
You'll be my breath should I grow old
You are my lover, you're my best friend
You're in my soul
My love for you is immeasurable
My respect for you immense
You're ageless, timeless, lace and fineness
You're beauty and elegance
As Annie finished her verse, Auggie raised his head and gave her the warm smile he saved just for her. She was caught off guard when he immediately starting singing the next verse to her, trying his best to meet her gaze.
You're a rhapsody, a comedy
You're a symphony and a play
You're every love song ever written
But honey what do you see in me
Annie was amazed at how beautiful his voice was, was there anything this man couldn't do? His rich baritone was well suited to the song and she was oddly mesmerized by him once again. He chuckled as she stretched up to kiss him sweetly, conveying her delight in his joining in the song with her. He leaned his head down, once again connecting his forehead with hers.
"You think the music's finally right, Walker?" Annie hummed in agreement and snuggled closer to his chest. He tightened his arms around her in response, enveloping her in his warm embrace. As if reading each other's minds, they started singing the final chorus in unison to each other as they swayed in rhythm to the fading music.
You're in my heart, you're in my soul
You'll be my breath should I grow old
You are my lover, you're my best friend
You're in my soul
By the time the song ended, it was almost full dark outside and Annie realized that, without the power turned on in the house yet, it was about to be extremely dark inside. They gathered up their belongings from the kitchen island, Annie turning off the music and tucking her phone in her pocket.
"We'd better get going before I can't see anything in here either." Annie joked, taking Auggie's hand.
"Wait a sec." Auggie pulled her to a stop, pulling his cane from his back pocket and unfurling it. "Want to borrow it again?"
"Oh har." Annie teased. "How about you lead the way this time?"
"Yes ma'am." He replied smugly as he placed her hand on his arm as she'd done with his so many times and proceeded to lead them both out into the cool evening air.
Annie placed Auggie's hand on the hood of the car and watched as he followed the lines of the vehicle to the door, found the handle and climbed inside.
"You coming or are you going to stand there and stare at me all night?"
"Groan. Eyeroll. Let's go smart ass." Auggie could clearly hear the smile in her voice as she got into the car next to him. He so loved that about her.
"Hey, I resemble that remark." He quipped, feigning indignation.
"Yes, you definitely do. But I wouldn't have it any other way." He flashed her his trademark all-knowing smirk and it warmed her all over, as it always did.
As Annie turned the car and headed down the driveway back to the main road, Auggie found her hand on the gear shift and covered it with his own, giving it a squeeze. Annie gazed at him, moonlight glinting off of his dark, windblown curls and wondered how she ever got so lucky.
Note: In case you're wondering, the song they dance to is "You're In My Heart" by Rod Stewart. It just seemed to fit the moment. :o)