A long time ago, in a faraway land, there lived a boy who went by the name of Neku. Now, Neku wasn't very well respected by the people. He was known as "That Boy With the Phones", or just "Phones." Everyone knew not to hang around Hachiko in fear they might see the dreaded Phones with his unnaturally spiky orange hair. J of M was also not a place you could be in without checking your back every five seconds, for the vile Phones might be there buying his tacky clothing…
"My clothes are not tacky," Neku glared.
"Yes they are! I keep telling you to stay with the trends but you don't listen to me!" yelled Shiki, but was interrupted by Joshua's giggle.
"Well, perhaps I should give it a go, hm?" He giggled again.
A long time ago, in a faraway land, there lived a prince who went by the name of Neku. King Beat, Neku's father, had just passed and it was time for Neku to take throne. Prince Neku wasn't too talkative and didn't speak without a purpose, so the people of the Shibuya Kingdom didn't respected him much and gave him the name Phones after his everyday headgear. Luckily, Prince Phones had an adorable servant named Joshua who aided him in his public speaking. Prince Phones was so grateful for the help, and asked the poor servant Joshua if he wanted anything in return for the all the things he taught him. Joshua only smiled as he traced his fingers along Prince Phones' jaw line, commenting on how smooth and pale his skin was….
"What the hell is this," Neku dumfoundedly stated. "I don't want to be a part of your shit."
Joshua made another of his insane giggles. "Oh sweetie, don't knock it till you try it." He placed a hand on Neku's shoulder. "Hm, Shiki? Your face is red. You didn't get sick down here, did you?"
Shiki didn't answer.
"Naw, naw, let me show you how this is done, yo!" Beat said enthusiastically, cracking his knuckles.
A long time ago, in a faraway land there lived a punk who went by the name of Neku. But no one ever called him that because his name was dumb, so he went by Phones. Phones made oodles of people pissed by not speaking and hating everyone, so no one gave a fuck about him. One day, the people of Shibuya just snapped and jumped Phones, tearing the phones out of his orange diarrhea shit hair. Soon, Phones dead, and a loyal patron and hero of Shibuya by the name of Beat, stood of Phone's dead body with his purple phones raised above his head….
"I keep telling you," Neku rolled his eyes. "Never touch the phones."
"Come on, man! That one was the shit, and you know it, yo!" Beat fist pumped like just got someone to laugh at his stupid comedy routine.
"I do agree that it was 'the shit.' Rhyme, you've been quiet since we came down to my place. How about you try?"
Rhyme's head suddenly jerked up. "Of, sorry. I was wondering how you got all these fish in here. Well, okay, I guess I'll do my best."
A long time ago, in a faraway land, there lived a man who went by the name of Neku. Neku didn't speak much, and he always wore purple headphones, giving him the name of Phones. Phones didn't exactly like people, but he still had four great friends. Phones went through a lot with his four friends, and even though Phone claimed to hate people, everyone knew he loved his friends more than everything in the entire world and wouldn't trade them for anything…
Neku didn't say anything.
"Hey! Why are you guys laughing? Come on!" cried Rhyme.
"Naw, Rhyme," Beat tried to say through his laugh. "That was the best story, hands down!"
"Yes, I agree. It really showed Neku's…. Nekuness," Shiki said as calmly as she could before laughing hysterically.
"That was lovely, Rhyme. Pure and sweet, just like Neku," Joshua looked up at Neku. "I never knew you thought about me that way, Neku."
"Argh! God dammit. I'm doing this and proving you guys that all your stories are crap."
A long time ago, in a faraway land, there lived a pissed off guy named Neku. No matter how many people tried to call him Phones, his name was still freaking Neku. Neku hated people, had always hated people, and will always hate people. The End.