Warnings : implied slash

AN1: Un'beta'd, will get it done when beta is back from holiday.

AN2: Done as part of a challenge me and my friend DementedViper are doing, music on random and each write a fic to the song we get. This was Dido - Don't Believe In Love.

AN3: This song was hard! lol

If I don't believe in love
Nothing is good for me

Jim Kirk stepped into the Academy with a reputation attached to him. He was the son of the famous George Kirk, the man who had saved the many crewman of the Kelvin. He was the son of a legend and that itself gave him a sort of status. Within two weeks of being at the Academy he had a reputation for a very different reason, one that didn't have anything to do with his Father.

Jim Kirk was a flirt through and through, his first few weeks already put him working his way through half of the girls in his classes, the other half well under the way. Jim lived for thrills and excitement, which was the whole reason he had applied for command at the Academy. It was the same with girls (and sometimes guys). He loved the rush of the pull, the chase as it were.

One night stands. Jim didn't do commitment, commitment to the moment was the most that any girl could expect from him. When he was with them, he was with them and he made it habit to make them feel as good as he did. He wasn't a selfish man after all. Anything more than a night was more than he was willing to give, because Jim Kirk didn't do love.


If I don't believe in love
Nothing will last for me

Love wasn't a notion that Jim believed in. Love was just an excuse to collar someone into believing that they were yours and no one else, it was like possession. Love tied you down and all Jim wanted was to be free to do what he wanted. Whenever someone got to close, expected more than he was willing to give he knew it was time to get out and dodge. There had been a few girls (and some guy whose name he couldn't remember) that he had dared to see more than once, thinking that they were on the same page. Evidently he was wrong. So Jim dodge and moved on, they wouldn't last anyway so why was it worth trying?


When I don't believe in love
Nothing is new for me

Jim loved his life, was happy with his life, but even he would admit that the bed hopping got boring. No less enjoyable, but when you did the same thing every night it stopped being exciting, and excitement was exactly what he wanted. It was the same routine, get them, bed them, leave the. Crude, but it was how he worked. He often saw people around him at the Academy, people at the bars he hit, people who were together in couples. He used to think nothing of it, but he see's them and can't help but notice the glint in there eyes, like they were discovering something new. He always used to wonder how, because surely seeing the same person all the time got routine, got dull.

He had Bones once, he swore he was probably drunk, why people stayed together? Why did he stay with his wife? Bones had told him that having someone who wanted to stay with you made you feel wanted, that having someone to grow with meant that things were always changing but it a good way. You got to learn about them, you got to experience things with them. He said that you could never get bored with someone you love because there was no time limit or sense of knowing your time was up when you were in a permanent relationship. You just were, and that was enough.

Jim thinks he had laughed at that, think that Bones had glared at him sadly, but he always thinks that maybe he had a point.


If I don't believe in love

You're too good for me

Jim will curse Bones till the day he dies because he had a routine dammint and it worked. It was all his talk about learning and growing that had done it. He was a one night type of bloke, so why was he suddenly not even that? He was lucky to score once a week, and even then he felt bad. There was no way he should feel bad having sex and it was all Bones fault.

Why? Because now he wanted the one thing he couldn't have. Bones with his snarky attitude and his gruff voice. The way he walked, hell even the way he smelt made Jim want him. He knew, just knew that Bones wanted him as well and that wasn't just cockiness on his part. He knew that all he had to do was ask and he would get what he wanted. He also knew that he couldn't do that.

Jim Kirk didn't believe in love, Jim Kirk believed in the moment. At every moment of his day he wished he could believe in love.

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