Chapter One: An Army is Formed!

Ever since her birth, Puffster the Jigglypuff had high aspirations. She didn't just want to be rich or famous; she wanted to rule the world. And if she had assembled a powerful army, who would stop her?
Every day the pink puffball would go to Beach Cave and train for hours upon hours. Fighting hordes of Shellos and Kabuto eventually brought her to her physical limits, what they call level one hundred. She was sure she was now unbeatable, however overconfident that thought may have been.
Every night she would continue construction on the underground army base. After all, an army base was completely exposed if over ground, right? Her sweat, blood and perseverance eventually created a massive underground networking, hidden only by a manhole cover. Puffster only hoped that the Diglett wouldn't find their way in.
She had even thought of a name for it: the Pink Army.

But for several years, she had never come across another Igglybuff, Jigglypuff or Wigglytuff (other species sickened her, and she refused them). That would all change one breezy summer morning...

Blissey was tending to eggs left by other Pokemon for her daycare services. The jolly pink thing was tucking a bright-red egg into a pouch on her stomach, humming a peppy tune. "Don't go anywhere!" she joked, pointing to the other eggs. "Tee hee!" As she left the tent (which looked almost exactly like her), Puffster poked her fluffy head out from behind a bush. She held a pair of binoculars in her nubby little hands.

Idiot fat lady, talking to herself, she thought, grimacing. She disgusts me, talking when nobody cares about whatever she says. Today Puffster thought of what turned out to be an obvious solution: adopt a child. She had looked into the tent for the past eight days, but couldn't spot a pink, swirly-marked egg. Maybe today there was one. There had to be one. Of course, that's the only reason why I didn't write about the other times she looked.

So obviously the egg was there, sitting against a plushy pillow. Puffster swiftly leaped onto a desk, an angry puffy face forced upon her cute little body. She delicately grabbed the egg, which was over half her size. How could someone like her have possibly laid an egg the size of that!? Whatever. She hopped out as fast as she had gone in and dashed into the army base.

Puffster laid the egg in her somehow-stolen oven to warm it. Don't worry, she only set it onto its lowest setting. In only days it hatched into a smiling baby Igglybuff, its red eyes huge and its tuft of hair unkempt. She was named Private (or Pvt., for short) Puff, for being a private, and also being very puffy.

Pvt. Puff always obeyed her mother's commands, never questioning them. She cleaned the humongous base, prepared the food, did other chores and what-not. For some reason she would never evolve, no matter how much Puffster showed her affection. Did Puffster truly have any love to give? Despite this setback, she decided to let Pvt. Puff try battling for once by the time she seemed capable..

"Well, Puff," she said in her squeaky, not-at-all-commanding voice one day, "I think it is time you tried battling other Pokemon. After all, I cannot fend off enemy armies or teams myself."

Puff was dusting off a cabinet made out of rough stone, while standing on a ladder made out of rough stone. "Well, okaaay," she said in an even squeakier voice.

And that was that.

"This is Beach Cave." Puffster pointed to a rocky cavern lying on the beach. It looked dark and despairing, but Pvt. Puff didn't seem to mind. "Go on. Fight."

Equipped with a trusty broom, the Igglybuff warily entered. Spinning the broom around extremely fast, she knocked out enemy horseshoe crabs left and right! Whenever the Omanyte ganged up on her, she would jump-kick two of them at a time! When a Shellos stole her broom, her lovely song, trademark of their breed, would put it to sleep so she could reclaim it! All was going according to plan...

End of Chapter-

NO! That was only in Puffster's imagination. She hoped that Puff's skills were that awesome. After all, she WAS her child. To not have a capable child would bring shame on her part. And what were the chances of her finding another egg? Breeding was out of the question for her. Even if she found another egg, she remembered the hard work that went into raising the private. Did she really want to go through that again?

Meanwhile, inside of the cave...

Puff couldn't see. Even if light streamed in not far from the dark entrance, she couldn't see. Probably because she was ignorantly holding the broom in front of her face. As she walked cautiously forward, the wooden handle scraped along the rocks and hit a Kabuto's brown shell. It immediately retaliated, grabbing the broomstick and slamming her on the ground with surprising strength and speed.

"Ow!" She looked into the thing's eerie red eyes, surprised she could now see clearly, then merely let go of the broom. The Kabuto proceeded to eat it, pushing it into its black core. The private then remembered something Puffster had taught her: the element of surprise.

"When your enemy is distracted by something else, that is your time to attack. Sneak up from behind, then strike. It is especially easy for a light-footed Igglybuff like you...or a light-footed Jigglypuff like me...anyways, if you cannot surprise them that easily, simply charm them or sing to them..."

That was all Pvt. Puff remembered. It was probably enough. She carefully set her foot atop the shell again. The Pokemon turned around quickly, looking even more vicious than before. Puff fell backwards, stunned by this. "I'm not attacking you!" she lied, and the prehistoric Pokemon calmed down once again. Then she began to sing, "SINNNNNNGGGGGG!" It was hardly a song at all. Kabuto turned around again.

"...Is that really your idea of killing me?" it asked in a surfer-dude-like voice.

"You can talk?" Her eyes widened.

"Yeah. Your loud and obnoxious singing voice has helped me learn the error of my ways. I've lived here for a while, and tried to kill any trespassers that step on me. Now I realize that saying 'Hey! Get off of me!' is enough. Thanks, Igglybuff!"

"O-okay?" First of all, her name wasn't Igglybuff. Second, wasn't she supposed to defeat him in combat, not help him? Maybe helping counted as a knockout?

As Kabuto crawled out of the cave, his legs going fast but barely carrying him forward, Puffster caught him by his supposed neck, her face puffier and angrier than ever before.

"WHY DID YOU NOT KILL THIS POKEMON!?!?" she screeched.

"I-I couldn't! I tried singing, but-"

"She showed me the error of my ways!"

"MY ARMY IS NOT PEACEFUL! We have aspirations of taking over the world. You remember that, yes?" Puff nodded. "If we resorted to peaceful methods, how do you think everyone else would act towards it?"

"They would revolt!" Pvt. Puff was trained to answer this on command.

"Correct! And we cannot risk that, knowing how many other powerful creatures there are out there."

"Do I have to fight?!"

It was the first time the private had questioned her mother. Puffster was startled by this, unknowingly pausing for a moment and choking poor Kabuto even harder. "Well...if you're going to do such a HORRIBLE job as this attacking...no, you do not."

"Well...thanks."

"Erm...your welcome." Where did she learn that language from? Ignoring the thought, she punched Kabuto in the face and tossed him into the ocean. "With a punch like that he'll never remember...well, back to the army base. Come, private." She grabbed Puff by the hand and proceeded to walk back to the manhole cover.

End of Chapter One