"Why, exactly, are we in Florida, right now? Not that I am complaining; I mean, vacation on the keys? Yeah, even I'm not stupid enough to look at that gift horse," Pete asked as he stepped out of the car and took in the sights.
Myka rubbed her forehead and, once again, wondered if Pete ever listened to Artie, or Claudia, or her about the cases or, well, about anything. "You ever hear of Aileen Carol Pitman?"
Pete pursed his lips and squinted into the sky, clearly thinking, and a process that might actually be painful to him. "Let me try," Claudia piped in from behind the pair. "Aileen Wuornos, the person Charlize Theron played in Monster."
"Oh, I remember that film. Great film, even when she grunged up Charlize looks smoking' hot. I think she won a Golden Globe for that, but what has that got to do with us being in the Palms?" Pete said, obviously proud of knowing that little bit of information.
"So, two days ago a sweet lady started to turn tricks, or she tried to, when she finally hooked a John she shot him four times in the chest and twice in the head and then stole his wallet." Myka explained.
"Well, times are hard and I will not judge someone who has fallen on hard times," Pete said seriously.
"Yeah, except Mrs. Susan Nunnemaker was married, four kids, ten grandkids, and was, technically, a millionaire. She, not her husband, owned several grocery store chains in the Tri-State area and let's not forget being at the tender young age of Eight-five," Claudia explained.
Pete looked a little green at the information, but rolled with it and said; "Yeah, okay so Granny decided to turn a few tricks before she kicks the bucket. She wouldn't be my choice, but everyone has different tastes. I mean if the John hit her, she deserved to kill him; not cool to hit little old ladies."
"I agree, however we don't think this is just a life crisis on her part. When the police questioned her, she couldn't recall anything. Now, she could have Alzheimer's, which is what the local police are chalking it up to, or it could be the High Standard Double .22 they found in her possession. A gun that she picked up at an auction, a gun that the seller was claiming belonged to the late Mrs. Wuornos." Myka explained.
"How did the seller even get their hands on the gun? I mean, didn't the police or someone lock it up?" Pete asked.
Myka looked more than a little disturbed by the question. "No one knows. There were some questions about internal corruption; there were a number of people that were snatching up so much of her stuff, selling her story, and stuff for a buck. She was a hot ticket item in the '90's. Sounds sick, I know, but it happens. Our job is not to figure out how it got around, but to get the gun and get it back to the warehouse before some other innocent bystander picks up the gun and starts killing men again."
"Well, does the gun only affect women who pick it up? I mean, what happens if a man picks it up?" Pete asked.
Claudia grinned and asked; "Want to find out? Look, we don't know. We didn't even know that the gun could be an artifact, but Artie speculated and he speculates well, so we are going with it and not touching it. When we get back to the Warehouse if you really want to see what it does we will lock you in a little room and you can tell us how you feel."
"Thanks, but no thanks. Let's just go in there and get this gun or whatever. Hopefully some whacked up She-Ra hasn't picked up the gun and went on the rampage," Pete said as he put on his glasses and walking toward the police station. He didn't have a bad feeling about this case, but he didn't have a good one either; which meant he was going in blind and he hated it.
Upon entering Myka went into her normal professional mode; "Hi, I'm Agent Bering and these are Agents Donovan and Lattimer of the Secret Service. We were wondering if you could help us out."
"Deputy Wotton and that depends on what you need help with," the deputy behind the counter said.
"Right, right. We just need to look over the Nunnemaker case files and evidence," Pete said as he took off his glasses.
"And the President is interested in an Alzheimer's patient because?" the man asked.
"She used to be her babysitter. She just wants us to look over everything and make sure no one is going to go after an innocent old woman. She needs to bring up her poll ratings, you understand," Claudia said cheekily.
"Right – I don't suppose any of you can show me some badges or proof you were sent here for some crazy old bat, who is not as innocent as she appears." The last sentence was said in a whispered voice as the officer looked around the office for someone – or something. Clearly, the man had seen one too many X-Files and was seeing conspiracy around every corner. Never mind that they were there for just that thing. This man didn't need to know that.
"There you go," Myka said as she flashed her badge and urged the other two to follow her lead.
"All right, now you folks didn't hear this from me, because Mrs. Nunnemaker is an upstanding citizen now a days, but in her youth, well, let's just say it's a good thing records are wiped clean at the age of eighteen. Not that her turning eighteen actually stopped her from misbehaving. Before she got right, she would turn trick and sell. I mean, of course, she was just trying to contribute to the family, who was having financial problems, but it just ain't right to have a young lady prostituting herself to feed lazy slugs who refuse to go out and get a job!"
"On that, we agree," Pete said seriously. "Look we really aren't here to start trouble with you or to poke at your case. We just need to make sure that the lady – I mean Mrs. Nunnemaker is well and that there is nothing that is going to come back and bite our beloved president in the ass."
"If he doesn't want his ass bitten maybe she should –"
"And we really need to see those files and evidence now," Myka said nervously.
"Give me a few. Why don't you just get cozy over there in that interrogation room? Promise no one will be snooping in your business there," the Deputy said as he pointed to a small windowless room just to their left.
"So, what do you want to talk about now?" Pete asked as soon as they entered the room.
"Not really," Myka said with a chuckle before sitting in one of the uncomfortable looking chairs.
"I have a question," Claudia said while grinning mischievously.
"Go for it," Myka prompted her to continue.
"Does Deputy Wotton look like Deputy Kevin Ellis from True Blood?"
"Who?" Myka asked just as Pete did a fist pump in the air yelling "Yes."
"So, I'm not the only one?" Claudia asked.
"He looks so much like him that it is creepy. I wonder if there is an artifact in here allowing him to hide how he really looks like," Pete whispered excitedly.
Myka couldn't but chuckle at the two kids in front of her. Really, they were so – odd, "What are you two talking about?"
"Deputy Kevin Ellis is a character in True Blood. Come on, tell me you've seen True Blood," Claudia begged.
"No, sorry, never heard of it," Myka answered honestly.
"Philistine," Pete hissed. "You need to watch more television. You're going to be left behind in more than half of our conversations. Get Netflix or something. We need to bring you out of the dark ages and into today."
"Pete – " Myka started.
"No, on this I am right. You can't bury yourself in the past. You need to update your information and sometimes the only way you can do that is to watch some mindless television."
Claudia winced a bit at Pete's phrasing, but nonetheless backed him up by saying; "He's right you know and that is not something I say about Pete very often. You can't just hide in the Warehouse and learn about the past. I mean, just think, this gun is a part of recent history. Imagine how many artifacts are busy being created right now. It, it boggles the mind. We are sending people to fight all over the world. People are dying here, violently I might add, hourly. There are stars being born, other's dying, and all those little insignificant moments to you or me, they might be big life changing moments for the person they are happening to. So, sit down and watch a little boob tube with us every now and again. I promise I won't make you watch any soul sucking programs."
Myka looked a little startled at what Claudia had revealed. "You mean to tell me there are soul sucking programs on television?"
Pete, being Pete, laughed his head off at the question. This caused Claudia to stomp on his foot and point her finger at him. "Stop it; we don't make fun of questions. To answer your question Myka, that depends on who you ask. Some people swear all sports programs suck the souls and minds of men. Where some swear soap operas do that; I, personally, think that day-time talk shows do that, but they are still amusing."
Myka held her hands up in surrender; "Okay, I'll watch some programs with you guys, no porn though. I won't promise to like then, but I promise not to shut them down in the first minute of the program. That is if the Deputy ever returns. I wonder what's keeping him."
As if her words had summoned him the Deputy showed up with a large box, much larger than any of them would have expected.
"What's all of this?" Myka asked with a small smile dancing on her lips.
"We're very thorough here Agent Bering. Something I am sure the President will be grateful for," Deputy Wotton said as he raised his eyebrow in irritation.
"I'm sure she will. I was just surprised, not many places keep such meticulous files." Myka lied smoothly.
"Hey, is that the phone?" Claudia asked as Deputy Wotton puffed out his chest proudly.
Wotton looked started when he realized that, yes, it was the phone; he quickly asked, "Will you be all right in here by yourselves? Normally I would have to stay in here, but we're ummm, busy. So I need to go man the phones."
"We promise that your files and evidence will remain intact. You go and do what you need to do Deputy. Criminals wait for no man, in fact, they actively run from us," Pete assured him with a grin.
"If you need anything; just give me a yell," Wotton said to Myka, as he exited the room; ignoring Pete all together.
"He doesn't like me much," Pete complained.
"Don't worry about it; it takes time to get use to your brand of humor. Now, let's get this switched and pretend to do something so we can get out of here," Claudia said as she kept peeking out the door.
"Claudia, stop keeping watch, we are supposed to be in here. You standing by the door makes it look suspicious. Well, unless you are into older potbellied bald men," Pete hissed at her while snapping on his set of gloves.
"Right – right, sorry, I'm still not used to being in police stations legitimately. I'm used to handcuffs and questions." She explained.
"You're going to have to get use to it quick. We can't compromise our work sue to nervousness. Found the gun. Wow, think about it, the first female serial killer used this baby. Damn, I am glad I never ran into her," Pete said as he carefully unsealed the evidence bag and withdrew the .22 pistol.
"Actually she's not the first female serial killer. It could be argued that Elizabeth Bathory is the first female serial killer, but her killing numbers were more on the mass murder side than serial. However, it's generally accepted that Lavina Fisher is the true first female serial killer. She was hung for highway robbery in 1820, no serial killers back then, no one knows exactly how many victims she killed. That was before H.H. Holmes even. One day I want to travel that far back and see what it was like back then," Myka, rambled before grabbing the gun. She stood there staring at the gun, almost in awe of it.
"Myka, we need to put the gun in the bag," Pete said nervously once he noticed the lack of gloves on Myka's hands.
"You fucking men, always trying to push a lady around. Especially you pigs. Do you know what I want? I mean I really want this right now," Myka asked as she licked the gun seductively.
"A cheeseburger and fries?" Pete asked.
"No, what I want to do is take this gun and rape your ass with it like you raped me!" Myka yelled.
"Myka, we've never had sex. I never raped you. The gun is affecting you. Please, put the gun in the bag and we'll forget this while day ever happened," Pete pleaded as he held out the neutralizing bag.
"Put the gun down?"
"Myka, you're scaring me," Claudia said just off to her side.
"No, don't be afraid of me Clauds. I'll love you and protect you. I'll do away with this pig and then we can be free," Myka said desperately.
"Look, we can use my gun, my gun is better. That gun scares me. Please, switch with me? Let me feel safe," Claudia, pleaded as she held out her hand.
"Anything for you babe. Besides your barrel is bigger, it will hurt his ass even more when I shove it into his fucking ass," Myka snarled as she switched guns with Claudia.
"Pete, quick, the bag!" Claudia said once the gun was in her hand.
"Catch," he yelled as he tossed her the bag.
"Clauds, what are you doing? No, don't - " Myka screamed and passed out as Claudia stuffed the gun into the neutralizing bag.
"I got ya," Pete said as he caught Myka and gently laid her to the ground. "Claudia, quick, switch the guns."
As quickly, as she could Claudia put the replacement gun in the evidence bag and dropped to her knees next to Myka just as Deputy Wotton entered. "What happened? Everything all right?"
"She's diabetic and forgot to eat this morning. Do you have any juice, peanut butter, or a hard candy?" Claudia asked holding up the Farnsworth wiggling it and acting as if she knew just what she was doing and talking about.
"Got it," Wotton said as he rushed to get – something.
"Anything you want to tell me Clauds? Come on Myka, that's enough beauty sleep," Pete said while tapping the unconscious Myka's cheek.
"About what? You already know she's not diabetic and I was hoping clueless back there didn't either. As for Myka's flip out, I'm guessing she got possessed by Aileen's anger."
"Stop patting my face Pete. What happened?" Myka asked irritably and sadly just as Wotton re-entered the room.
"Oh good, you managed to get her conscious. Here, I hope you don't mind butterscotch it's all I have. Sorry, no juice or peanut butter," Wotton said as he handed a confused Myka the candy. "Do you need some sugar water, sweetened coffee, or anything else?"
"Thanks, Myka said while holding the candy and looking very lost.
"You fainted Agent Bering. I mean, your blood sugar dropped causing you to black out and Deputy Wotton was kind enough to go out and get you something to help raise your blood sugar. You have to stop forgetting to eat in the mornings," Pete said eyeing Myka, willing her to go along with everything he said.
"Right, yeah, thanks Deputy. I think we should go. I – I left my medicine in the car. We should probably go and get it," Myka said after she popped the butterscotch in her mouth and stood up slowly.
"What about the case? Did you find what you needed?" Wotton asked reaching out his hand to help Myka off the floor.
"Yeah, we found everything we needed. You guys keep doing the good work and keeping those meticulous files. They helped out a lot," Claudia said as she eased her way toward the door.
"Thanks, we here at the Quinlan PD are more than happy to assist the Secret Services in any way we can," Wotton said as he leered at Myka.
"I'll keep that in mind," Myka said nervously as she and Pete made their way to the exit.
"Hey, are you okay Mykes?" Pete asked once they were safely inside their car.
"Yeah, it's just –" Myka started before shaking her head and leaning back in the seat.
"Just what? Come on don't leave us hanging like that," Claudia prompted.
"I was just wondering if those feelings were Aileen's or if Aileen was possessed by them." She finally asked.
"Near as we can tell it was her's, the gun was basically manufactured just a few years before she bought it," Claudia explained.
"It – it was so lonely. I just – I mean she just wanted a place to belong and she was just so frightened of everything and at the same time so fed up with it. I wanted Pete to kill me before I killed him," Myka explained quietly.
"Never happening Mykes, I mean, sure I would shoot you with the Tesla gun, maybe shoot your leg if I couldn't get to it, but I would never kill you," Pete assured her.
"I feel so much safer knowing you would shoot me," Myka said with a laugh.
"Good, now let's go and see if Artie has anymore Scotties at the Warehouse," Pete said with a smirk before turning his attention fully to the road.
"Yeah, let's do that," Myka said softly as she looked out the window. As the trees passed her by, she wondered how many other killers were as tortured as Aileen was.
~Fin~