Konnichiwa, minna-san!

This is the new improved Chapter One of I'll Turn To You Now.

I hope you will enjoy this as much as you enjoyed the old chappies.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP has the right to say that they do. But I do not.

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I'll Turn To You Now
A CCS Fanfic by Starfire Star

Chapter One: The Memories

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Sakura Kinomoto sat at the kitchen table of her house, drinking coffee and staring out the window of her house. Her emerald-eyes sparkled with a tinge of sadness in them. She sighed once in a while.

"Mom?" her 10 year-old daughter Meiko stood beside her mother, staring at her. She too, had auburn hair, though it was darker and longer, but had amber-eyes.

"Hmm?" Sakura glanced at her daughter. "What is it?"

"Mom, you look so sad and lonely," Meiko told her mother.

"I do?" Sakura said with a tiny laugh as she took another sip of coffee. "Don't worry."

"I bet you never felt lonely when Dad was around," Meiko remarked.

Sakura's head snapped in her daughter's direction. "Well, of course not. If I felt lonely when your father was around then I wouldn't have had you."

"Mom, was I an accident?" Meiko asked, jumping at the chance to talk about her father.

"What?" Sakura's eyes grew wide. "Of course you weren't! What made you think that?"

"Nothing," Meiko sighed as she slumped down onto the chair next to her mother's. "It's just that Dad would've been here if I wasn't an accident."

"Meiko, your father has nothing to do with your life. He never saw you, held you, taken care of you, or did anything involving you," Sakura said. "So therefore, he's pretty much not your father. Just the person that helped make you be here today."

"Why didn't he ever see me?" Meiko asked.

"Because… because…" Sakura said, her eyes practically filling with tears. "I hate to tell you this Meiko… but when I was only 2 months pregnant, your father left me. He didn't tell me where he was going, why he did it or anything. I just found out from your aunt."

"W-what…" Meiko felt numb and had her mouth open in a perfect o. "I can't believe he left you! What a jerk!" Meiko cried.

"Meiko Kinomoto!" Sakura said firmly, frustrated with her daughter.

"Mom, I'm serious! This guy is a total utter jerk!" Meiko said. "The one who had borne me! My own flesh and blood! I can't believe it! I can't believe you'd have me with an idiot!"

"Meiko, I never got to tell him that I was pregnant with you," Sakura said, almost shouting. "He left before I got a chance to tell him. So I'm sure he would've been with us if he knew. I… I guess he had his reasons to leave."

"No he doesn't!" Meiko snapped. "If he loved you enough to have me, he would have still been with you, no matter what happened!"

"Well… then…" Sakura's voice trailed off. "Now that I think about it… I-I guess he didn't love me enough to stay with me no matter what the consequences. He just loved me enough to have you."

"But-" Meiko tried to say.

"And furthermore, why do you have to bring this up now? Your father doesn't matter!" Sakura cried.

A single tear fell from Sakura's eyes. And then the tears kept pouring in.

"Mom… it's okay. I understand if you don't want to talk about it. Now I think my dad's a jerk, so we don't have to talk about him," Meiko whispered to her mother.

"Meiko…" Sakura said, wiping away tears and sniffing a little. "I'm sorry. Just… just go to your room and do something."

"Okay," Meiko slowly walked up the stairs to her room, staring at her mom as she left.

As soon as Sakura heard Meiko close the door to her bedroom, she moved towards the cordless phone and picked it up. She dialed a number.

"Moshi Moshi," a voice answered.

"Hey, Tomoyo. It's Sakura," Sakura said, with a couple of sniffles.

"Oh, Sakura! Hey!" Tomoyo's voice said cheerfully. She paused for a moment, remembering how Sakura sniffled, and then said, "Sakura, it sounds as if you've been crying. Are you alright?" she said with a tone of worry.

"Y-yeah… I'm okay. Listen can you come over? It's urgent," Sakura whispered to her cousin/best friend.

"Sure Sakura. I'll be there ten minutes," Tomoyo reassured.

"Thanks, Tomoyo," Sakura said. She hung up the phone then slump to the floor, her back against the wall.

"Why did I even have to tell Meiko this?" Sakura was annoyed with herself. "Why did she have to be so curious?"

"I still need to know some things myself."

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Tomoyo knocked on Sakura's front door.

Sakura opened it; her emerald eyes filled with worry and sadness, and gave Tomoyo a hug.

"What's the matter, hon? Are you okay?" Tomoyo stepped inside the house and took off her knee-high leather boots and black trench coat.

They went to the kitchen, where Sakura reluctantly had another cup of coffee.

"So, what's the matter Saku?" Tomoyo asked Sakura.

"Meiko brought up her father again. But this time, she digged right in the details. I don't know why I did it, Tomoyo! It just spilled out!"

"What spilled out?" Tomoyo asked, eyebrows raised.

"I told her that Syaoran left when I was pregnant! Do you think she deserves to know now? At such a young age! Only ten!" Sakura shook her head.

"Sakura, ten's not that a young age. Better than when she's twenty and more mature and curious than ever."

"But wouldn't she be too mature to handle this properly?" Sakura asked.

"Meiko would be too emotionally mature. She'd have more wisdom and wits," Tomoyo argued.

"I guess," Sakura said. "She called Syaoran a jerk and an idiot."

"Well I guess that's what he was. Before. When he walked out on you," Tomoyo shook her head. "I wonder if he's better than when he was before."

"I lied to her," Sakura admitted to Tomoyo as she looked down.

"What did you say?"

"I told her she wasn't an accident," Sakura replied, still not looking at Tomoyo.

Tomoyo sighed. "She's going to find out some way or another."

"So do you think it's okay to tell Meiko about her father?" Sakura questioned.

"I suppose so. It's not like she's going to go search for him or wanting to meet him or anything. She called him a jerk, after all," Tomoyo added more sugar to her coffee.

"Tomoyo, you're going to get diabetes with all that sugar you put in!" Sakura's eyes narrowed as Tomoyo took yet another spoonful of sugar and added it to her coffee.

"Relax. I'm adding more cream. And sugar's what helps me get through the day," Tomoyo laughed.

Sakura sweatdropped.

"Besides, it's not like he's going to come crashing into your lives any time soon," Tomoyo reasoned.

Suddenly they heard footsteps going down the stairs.

"Mom?" Meiko called as she walked into the kitchen.

"Well, if it isn't my gorgeous niece!" Tomoyo smiled at Meiko.

"Auntie Tomoyo!" Meiko gave Tomoyo a hug.

"Nice to see you again dear," Tomoyo grinned.

Meiko smiled at her aunt.

"Hey… I was just thinking… why don't you come to my modeling show this weekend?" Tomoyo suggested. "One of my ten year-old models has the flu and can't come, so we need a substitute."

"Really?" Meiko asked brightly. "But I don't have any modeling experience!"

"Relax, you'll do fine," Tomoyo waved her hand airily. "It'll be great."

"Can I do it, mom?" Meiko glanced to her mother hopefully. "It'll be a great experience for me! And maybe one day I'll become one of those Top Models in Tokyo Teen Magazine!"

"Maybe not that far," Tomoyo remarked.

"I suppose so sweetie," Sakura smiled.

"Yay!" Meiko grinned and ran up the stairs. She stopped on her way up.

"Hey, mom!" she called. "Can I experiment with your makeup? I need to try doing that so I can get the feeling when the makeup people put it on me!"

Sakura sweat dropped. "Sure…"

"Hehe, at least she's bringing out her feminine side," Tomoyo laughed.

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Chapter Cleaned As of June 11th, 2006.

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