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A Broken Heart
Disclaimer:- I do not own the X-Men, Remy or Rogue. They belong solely to Marvel. For accurate info on Rogue/Gambit's history you can go to:-. http://www.geocities.com/threaza/bluexrogue/theremyrogueroad.htm (Rogue remembers all her past friendships before remembering her first love, Gambit).
You make sure she's securely fastened into her little seat. You take her small head in the palms of your hands and lift it slightly upwards, just enough to attach her tiny helmet. She's all set now and smiles at you. She looks just like her. Those same, green sparkling eyes stare at you even as that white streak of hair shines in the sun. They're hauntingly familiar and yet painfully distant. You shake them off and smile back at her and ask, ' Ready, ma petite?'
Bobbing her head up and down furiously, she says, 'Oui, poppa!'
You get in the front of the motorbike and ride off.
It doesn't take long to reach there but, by the time you do, the weather has changed. Now, the sun and clouds share the spotlight. The sound of the bike slices through the silence belonging to the cemetery. You don't want to get closer to "her" anyway, so, you stop the bike a good distance away, just outside the caretaker's old shed. Grateful for the silence again ,(as you didn't want any attention drawn to yourself) you help Coquine out of her tiny back seat attachment and remove her helmet. With one hand, she grabs the bouquet of magnolias she'd brought and with the other hand , grabs one of yours. She says, 'Come wit' me to see maman, poppa.'
'You go on now, ma petite. Mebbe I come later, hein?' You let go off her small hand. She makes a face at you, turns around and heads off. She looks just like her. Maybe that's why you named her after her maman. She looks like a miniature version of "her". If it wasn't for Coquine's somersaults on her way there, you wouldn't have seen a touch of anyone else in her but her maman. You regret never hearing any "Mississippi speech" coming from your daughter, but, you did the best you could with all you had left, the Guild.
A drop of rain hits you. It taps you on the shoulder, trying to make you turn around.. around to see a past, you'd prefer to forget. Coquine is at her maman's grave now. She places the magnolias on the base of the headstone and plops herself down on the grave. She's talking to "her". You can see her mouth moving, but, you can't hear the words. She's smiling . It's good to see her smile. She smiles just like 'her'. Coquine gets up and somersaults , showing off while she does. The side of your mouth works its way up a tad and you think, 'There's another touch of me in her.' Coquine must think her maman would like that. "She would," you think. She would be proud. Finished, Coquine lies down on the grave and snuggles up to the headstone. Rain is starting to drizzle now and you walk cautiously towards 'her'.
Reaching Coquine , you hear her say softly, 'I love you, maman'.
Swallowing hard, you say, 'Time to go, Coqui. Rain's comin', non?'.
She looks up at you and says, 'Okay, poppa.' She kisses the headstone and gets up.
'Go on by the shed and wait for me...'til the rain stops, petite.'
She nods to you then turns and blows a kiss to 'her'. She runs off.
The rain's pounding down on you now, but, you don't mind. You do all your crying in the rain. It's the memories it's bringing with it that's killing you. That first time when 'she' left, 'she' came back, but, this time, 'she' wasn't coming back. Automatically your mind opens that door to the past and you see it all again...
It rained that day too. It pounded on the cemetery .Your mind remembers it all in black and gray hues . There was no color save for the red in people's eyes , but NO EYE burned as RED as yours. You stood afar off, away from those other eyes. You watched the others standing around 'her' grave. Kurt was the Priest who did the funeral. Jean, Scott, Logan, everybody stood around reverently. And Stormy, she looked back and spotted you. Your eyes burned a bright red that cut through the gloom like blood from an open wound. Her glance wavered for a moment and then went back to where you were. But, now.you were gone.
Later that night, you came back, all alone. The rain still pelted you like tiny daggers hell bent on bringing you harm. You scornfully brushed it off , 'even the heaven's can't stop crying, eh?'. You looked at the headstone and read it aloud, 'ROGUE LeBEAU, beloved wife of REMY LeBEAU and mother of COQUINE LeBEAU. ~ Died in a fight for humanity at the young age of 29.'
You cursed the day you ever heard the name 'X-Men' and bent down and grabbed some of the fresh dirt from off the grave and put it into a tiny, plastic bag. You put that into your trenchcoat's pocket and said, 'Dat's so that you'll always be wit' me, mon coeur. You my heart, cherie. A man can't live wit'out his heart. Be seein' you Roguey..be countin' the days.' You didn't think it would be long before you joined her.
You kissed the headstone and knew that a piece of you died that day. Your heart was broken in two and living on didn't seem like something you could do with just a part of it. But, you took Coquine and travelled around the world, until, you realized that she needed some grounding and you needed some help. Coming back to the Guild wasn't as hard as you'd thought it would be and setting down roots was like planting where you had already reaped. You got the help you wanted. Tante Mattie, Mercy and even Belle took care of Coquine. She grew up and was well versed in Cajun speech and culture. But, you pitied that she didn't have even a hint of her maman's accent. She turned five and had asked to come here today, so, you brought her here. The first time for her, the first time back for you.
Thunder and lightning jolts you back into the present. Standing over 'her' grave now, you clear the dirt away from that familiar headstone. You read the words again, but, silently this time. Leaning down, you take out a tiny plastic bag from your trenchcoat. This dirt is different. It's from the front yard of your new house in New Orleans. This soil is soil that Coquine plays on. The soil that you AND Coquine play on. You sprinkle it on Rogue's grave and say, 'Dat's so that I'll always be wit' you..that WE'LL always be wit' you.'
You stand up and feel a small palm in one of yours.
'Poppa, the rain's stopped,' she said.
You hadn't noticed.until now, so you say, 'Oui, Coqui.'
'Ah asked maman to stop de rain for you. You were wettin' bad , poppa.'
Smiling, you say, 'You think she be hearin' you, mon petite coeur?'
'Uh-huh...she always hears me and she stopped de rain because she loves you.'
You smile so broadly that it's hard to stop. You think to yourself, 'did she just say, 'Ah?' How did she.?' Non, you must be hearing things, hein? Are you?
For some reason, you feel more complete now. Like something is giving you back the piece of your heart that you lost. Something that bonds the two pieces back together, Coquine.
Smiling, you turn, kiss the headstone and say, ' Love you too, mon coeur.always.'
Leaving Rogue now is easier than before, because this time ,you know you're taking back that piece of you that you left that day. A heart that can never be broken into pieces . A heart that calls you 'poppa' and Rogue, 'maman'. A heart that bonds all three into one ..pour toujours.
La fin
A Broken Heart
Disclaimer:- I do not own the X-Men, Remy or Rogue. They belong solely to Marvel. For accurate info on Rogue/Gambit's history you can go to:-. http://www.geocities.com/threaza/bluexrogue/theremyrogueroad.htm (Rogue remembers all her past friendships before remembering her first love, Gambit).
You make sure she's securely fastened into her little seat. You take her small head in the palms of your hands and lift it slightly upwards, just enough to attach her tiny helmet. She's all set now and smiles at you. She looks just like her. Those same, green sparkling eyes stare at you even as that white streak of hair shines in the sun. They're hauntingly familiar and yet painfully distant. You shake them off and smile back at her and ask, ' Ready, ma petite?'
Bobbing her head up and down furiously, she says, 'Oui, poppa!'
You get in the front of the motorbike and ride off.
It doesn't take long to reach there but, by the time you do, the weather has changed. Now, the sun and clouds share the spotlight. The sound of the bike slices through the silence belonging to the cemetery. You don't want to get closer to "her" anyway, so, you stop the bike a good distance away, just outside the caretaker's old shed. Grateful for the silence again ,(as you didn't want any attention drawn to yourself) you help Coquine out of her tiny back seat attachment and remove her helmet. With one hand, she grabs the bouquet of magnolias she'd brought and with the other hand , grabs one of yours. She says, 'Come wit' me to see maman, poppa.'
'You go on now, ma petite. Mebbe I come later, hein?' You let go off her small hand. She makes a face at you, turns around and heads off. She looks just like her. Maybe that's why you named her after her maman. She looks like a miniature version of "her". If it wasn't for Coquine's somersaults on her way there, you wouldn't have seen a touch of anyone else in her but her maman. You regret never hearing any "Mississippi speech" coming from your daughter, but, you did the best you could with all you had left, the Guild.
A drop of rain hits you. It taps you on the shoulder, trying to make you turn around.. around to see a past, you'd prefer to forget. Coquine is at her maman's grave now. She places the magnolias on the base of the headstone and plops herself down on the grave. She's talking to "her". You can see her mouth moving, but, you can't hear the words. She's smiling . It's good to see her smile. She smiles just like 'her'. Coquine gets up and somersaults , showing off while she does. The side of your mouth works its way up a tad and you think, 'There's another touch of me in her.' Coquine must think her maman would like that. "She would," you think. She would be proud. Finished, Coquine lies down on the grave and snuggles up to the headstone. Rain is starting to drizzle now and you walk cautiously towards 'her'.
Reaching Coquine , you hear her say softly, 'I love you, maman'.
Swallowing hard, you say, 'Time to go, Coqui. Rain's comin', non?'.
She looks up at you and says, 'Okay, poppa.' She kisses the headstone and gets up.
'Go on by the shed and wait for me...'til the rain stops, petite.'
She nods to you then turns and blows a kiss to 'her'. She runs off.
The rain's pounding down on you now, but, you don't mind. You do all your crying in the rain. It's the memories it's bringing with it that's killing you. That first time when 'she' left, 'she' came back, but, this time, 'she' wasn't coming back. Automatically your mind opens that door to the past and you see it all again...
It rained that day too. It pounded on the cemetery .Your mind remembers it all in black and gray hues . There was no color save for the red in people's eyes , but NO EYE burned as RED as yours. You stood afar off, away from those other eyes. You watched the others standing around 'her' grave. Kurt was the Priest who did the funeral. Jean, Scott, Logan, everybody stood around reverently. And Stormy, she looked back and spotted you. Your eyes burned a bright red that cut through the gloom like blood from an open wound. Her glance wavered for a moment and then went back to where you were. But, now.you were gone.
Later that night, you came back, all alone. The rain still pelted you like tiny daggers hell bent on bringing you harm. You scornfully brushed it off , 'even the heaven's can't stop crying, eh?'. You looked at the headstone and read it aloud, 'ROGUE LeBEAU, beloved wife of REMY LeBEAU and mother of COQUINE LeBEAU. ~ Died in a fight for humanity at the young age of 29.'
You cursed the day you ever heard the name 'X-Men' and bent down and grabbed some of the fresh dirt from off the grave and put it into a tiny, plastic bag. You put that into your trenchcoat's pocket and said, 'Dat's so that you'll always be wit' me, mon coeur. You my heart, cherie. A man can't live wit'out his heart. Be seein' you Roguey..be countin' the days.' You didn't think it would be long before you joined her.
You kissed the headstone and knew that a piece of you died that day. Your heart was broken in two and living on didn't seem like something you could do with just a part of it. But, you took Coquine and travelled around the world, until, you realized that she needed some grounding and you needed some help. Coming back to the Guild wasn't as hard as you'd thought it would be and setting down roots was like planting where you had already reaped. You got the help you wanted. Tante Mattie, Mercy and even Belle took care of Coquine. She grew up and was well versed in Cajun speech and culture. But, you pitied that she didn't have even a hint of her maman's accent. She turned five and had asked to come here today, so, you brought her here. The first time for her, the first time back for you.
Thunder and lightning jolts you back into the present. Standing over 'her' grave now, you clear the dirt away from that familiar headstone. You read the words again, but, silently this time. Leaning down, you take out a tiny plastic bag from your trenchcoat. This dirt is different. It's from the front yard of your new house in New Orleans. This soil is soil that Coquine plays on. The soil that you AND Coquine play on. You sprinkle it on Rogue's grave and say, 'Dat's so that I'll always be wit' you..that WE'LL always be wit' you.'
You stand up and feel a small palm in one of yours.
'Poppa, the rain's stopped,' she said.
You hadn't noticed.until now, so you say, 'Oui, Coqui.'
'Ah asked maman to stop de rain for you. You were wettin' bad , poppa.'
Smiling, you say, 'You think she be hearin' you, mon petite coeur?'
'Uh-huh...she always hears me and she stopped de rain because she loves you.'
You smile so broadly that it's hard to stop. You think to yourself, 'did she just say, 'Ah?' How did she.?' Non, you must be hearing things, hein? Are you?
For some reason, you feel more complete now. Like something is giving you back the piece of your heart that you lost. Something that bonds the two pieces back together, Coquine.
Smiling, you turn, kiss the headstone and say, ' Love you too, mon coeur.always.'
Leaving Rogue now is easier than before, because this time ,you know you're taking back that piece of you that you left that day. A heart that can never be broken into pieces . A heart that calls you 'poppa' and Rogue, 'maman'. A heart that bonds all three into one ..pour toujours.
La fin