A Case of Mistaken Identity
By: Christie Lo
The familiar hum of cold grey steel drifting through space resonated throughout the Bebop. Ein was scratching at his food bowl knowing all the while there was no hope for food to magically appear inside of it. Ed, with her goggles on, was happily talking to herself while net-diving into a database belonging to the Inter-Solar System Police. Spike and Jet were lounging by the TV occasionally paying attention to the interstellar news. Faye strutted into the living room and settled into the free chair. It was time for Big Shot to air, and the crew sure needed the money.
Dressed to the nines in western wear, Punch and Judy blasted onto the screen promising the chance to earn millions of woolongs! Faye piped up over the broadcast, "I'm so hungry and there's no food around here just like always. Pay attention boys and let's try to actually apprehend these outlaws."
Appearing on screen was a red grappling ship featuring a Münchhausen reactor. Judy was narrating over the video of the red, fighter pilot shaped ship speeding out of the view "yee-haw that there is a mighty fast ship y'all, and there's only one crew who could be aboard!"
"That's right Judy, the infamous crew of the Outlaw Star! They won the Space Race with the fastest ship in the galaxy! This band of outlaws could be none other than Gene Starwind himself with his kid sidekick, crazy Ctarl Ctarl and the lovely and lustrous Melfina. They are sometimes accompanied by the mysterious and deadly Suzuka."
"Well, Punch, you won't believe the bounty that has been placed on this motley crew of criminals. According to the ISSS department of the Space Forces, this group is wanted for the destruction of the small satellite station Symka 5. That's some very serious business if'n ya ask me and that makes the value of their bounty more understandable. 1 billion woolongs has been placed on these crafty crime doers heads! This is the largest bounty we've ever announced and has been brought to you in part by supporters of the MacDougall brothers."
The entire Bebop crew blurted out, "ONE BILLION WOOLONGS?!" simultaneously. They all knew that this would be the opportunity of a lifetime. Jet, Spike, Faye, and Ein turned their heads and stared at Ed waiting for details about the crew of the Outlaw Star.
"Gene Starwind, lazy but manages to be a ladies man, wields a castor gun. Jim Hawking, 11 years old, no picture, not much else is known about him except that he's the son of a notorious hacker. Aisha Clan Clan, a Ctarl Ctarl ambassador who lost respect from the empire when she was duped when searching for the Galactic Leyline. Melfina, the Outlaw Star's navigator, was created by Professor Gwen Khan. Suzuka, a rather mysterious femme fatale that only kills when the sun is setting, hmmm…" Ed continued her data mining looking for any clues on where to find the location of the Bebop's biggest bounty. "The XGP15A-II, named Outlaw Star, is usually seen commuting around Heifong III. It was designed by the Kei space pirate guild with four plasma Unsen engines and grappling arms. A formidable opponent, hah! Heifong III? But that's an awfully expensive place to dock."
Jet weighed the options, "Well we can either owe some people and pay them back after we get this bounty or go another few more weeks without food. What do you guys think?"
"I think I'm going to love kicking this Gene Starwind's guy's ass and eating something fancy after, how about you Faye?" Spike seemed excited.
"I think I'll be glad to have a nice meal after you claim this large bounty for me," Faye said.
Aboard the Outlaw Star, Gilliam was trying to be helpful in analyzing the current situation. "I think Jim is right, Gene. I think the crew aboard the greatest ship in the galaxy is being set up. How could we have destroyed the station at Symka 5 when you were starting a bar fight on Sentinel III? You're also lucky that Clyde hasn't charged you for the damages yet again," Gilliam said in his innocent and somewhat inquisitive tone.
"Look, just because I broke that stool over that slime ball's head doesn't mean that it wasn't in self defense!" Gene retorted.
"Okay fine, you boys argue, but there is still another ship out there that looks like us, and that's no good if someone goes and puts a bounty on us. I would be so embarrassed, and the empire would laugh at me!" exclaimed Aisha as she pawed at one of her ears.
"Hmph." Was all Suzuka had to add.
"Okay, well let's start looking for clues close to where we do business. We can see what our contacts on Heifong III know and spread out from there, okay?" asked Jim.
"Sounds like a plan, I've already changed our heading to take us there," Melfina chimed in.
The crew first made contact with Fred Luo, a flamboyant yet old friend of Gene's. After proclaiming how handsome Gene is and that the scars under his left eye make him more distinguished, Fred was willing to leak a little information. He mentioned that some Tao priests had been looking for information about the Outlaw Star. He also said, "Look Gene, we go way back so let me also tell you this. Honey, there were some sketchy people here asking about you. There was a tall lanky guy in a suit, a bulky cop type with a cybernetic arm of all things, a woman you would probably find absolutely luscious, and they had a kid and a dog."
"Thanks for the heads up Fred, I appreciate it, Gene out."
The XGP was being impersonated, a strange crew was looking for Gene and his friends, and that meant that the only place to find out what was really going on was Blue Heaven. The Corbanite mechanic Swanzo worked there and he also happens to be the one who painted the Outlaw Star. It stands to reason that if someone was looking for information on Gene's ship that they would talk to its mechanic. Swanzo would be a reliable source for information. People opened up to mechanics, they really don't seem like the type to gossip.
Suzuka and Melfina elected to stay onboard the Outlaw Star while Gene, Jim, and Aisha went to the star port garage where Swanzo was based out of. It was a little after lunchtime when the three arrived at the shop where Swanzo toiled. There were a few mechanics in jumpsuits running parts back and forth to various ground vehicles and shuttles in the front end of the garage by the office. There was a much larger hangar bay toward the back of the building where sparks were twinkling down from welders working on a spacecraft that was as large as a cruise ship. Swanzo worked out of a small office situated in the engineering bay of the warehouse so Gene headed straight there. As he and his team approached the office they could hear some shouting and see a small Welsh corgi barking at the people arguing inside the office.
As Gene and his team approached it became apparent there was also a muscular man and very attractive woman wearing yellow bickering with Swanzo. He was shaking his head and crossing his arms, but it was too early to tell what the argument was about. Just before Gene was within earshot he heard a faint click behind him. He turned around to see Jim holding very still looking shocked and Aisha starting to snarl. A lean man in a purple suit was poised behind the gun responsible for the clicking noise. He yawned and then introduced himself, "I'm Spike. Spike Spiegel. You're worth a lot of money so why don't you tell us where your ship is so we can turn you in and sit down for a nice steak by dinner time?"
Suddenly the late afternoon light glinted off of a pair of goggles as Ed, barefoot as always, somersaulted out of the office to see where Spike went. Ed was elated as she said, "Yay the bounty has arrived!" The trio being held up turned their heads slowly as Jim asked, "Edward? What are you doing with these bounty hunters?"
"TOMATO!" Ed screamed as she kart wheeled toward Jim and promptly jumped on him to hug him. "Tomato, tomato, tomato!"
Spike was getting annoyed having to hold his gun on someone for so long without using it, "Hey, Ed, want to tell me why you suddenly want tomatoes?"
"Sorry Spike. This is Tomato, my best friend when I lived at the orphanage. I guess he's Jim Hawking. There is no way no how no siree did he blow up the Symka 5 station! Look, even Ein likes him. Right?" She hoped she was right.
Jim, fully aware of the gun being pointed at him carefully explained, "Look, we were set up. There is no way we took out the station. We were chasing down a job while Gene was drinking in a bar on Sentinel III. Argh, Gene, why do you always get us into some crazy mess?" Jim pushed back his hair in aggravation and started as he noticed Ein was licking his shoes.
Swanzo, Faye, and Jet heard the ruckus and came out of the office to see what was going on. Spike stood down as they discussed how another ship had come into dry dock and Swanzo was paid a very large sum of money to recreate the paint job he had done on the Outlaw Star. It became clear that there was real evidence that Gene and his crew were being setup. The only question was, Why? Aisha suggested that everyone go back to the Outlaw Star to update Melfina and Suzuka and to try to find out why there was a setup with must be a false bounty prize.
Back on the ship, Gilliam reluctantly allowed the new crew onto the XGP, but insisted that if Ein went to the bathroom on any of his circuitry he would be very, very upset. Melfina was clearly surprised by the addition of bounty hunters on the ship, and Suzuka was nonplussed as well. After introductions were made, Jim and Ed started net diving for hints as to why the Outlaw Star was being setup. While that was going on both crews decided that it would be worth their time to team up, not to mention Gene offered the Bebop crew dinner.
"That can't be right! Why would this investigation be hidden?" Jet was furious. Jim and Ed had found what they were searching for. The classified ISSS document was the record of a sealed investigation into a group of racketeers indicated that the backers of the large bounty, MacDougall sympathizers, had struck a deal with some Tao priests to get revenge on Gene and his partners after they were successful in finding the Galactic Leyline. There was a name mentioned in the document everyone agreed must be the point of contact for such a devious plot, Setsuna Tanaka. He was trying to camouflage himself into a place where few people would look for him, the pleasure planet known as Tenrei.
Gene and Spike walked ahead of their teammates as they embarked on their visit to a small village on Tenrei known for its hot springs. It was rumored that Setsuna was running a few operations out of the local village and could usually found at Tiki Joe's bar. It was late afternoon, and the sun glinted off of a few small puddles where patrons dried off before going inside to drink.
The inside of Tiki Joe's was set in a tropical theme with bamboo and leis, and the bar was indeed an actual tiki bar. The lights dimmed toward the back of the bar and there, in a booth, sat Setsuna. Gene and Spike looked at each other, nodded, and slid in next to Setsuna while the rest of the new team went for drinks.
"Howdy, friend," Spike smiled, "Wanna tell us how you can afford to post such a lucrative bounty?"
Gene butted in, "Yeah, and why exactly did you have a replica made of my ship just to go and get me in trouble? Jerk!"
Setsuna's eyes darted around the room and a single drop of sweat slowly plodded down his forehead which was creased in thought. "Alright fellas, let's all be gentlemen here. Just calm down and let me explain everything." He was clearly trying to stall for time, and realized that with his plan in place, it couldn't hurt to actually explain things, "Well, the truth is, no one knows what happened to the MacDougall brothers. Ever since you all crossed each others paths at the Galactic Leyline, they have been missing. So the question is, how come you, Gene, are still alive? I don't know who your friend is here or how he is involved, but the fact is I am owed a very large some of money by the MacDougalls. If they are no longer around to pay me, I might as well exact revenge on the people responsible for their disappearance." He shifted in his seat, impatient. Spike and Gene were both very calm, seemingly unaware of the suspicious mannerisms Setsuna was displaying.
"As you can see," Setsuna continued, "I've lured you here to where my current base of operations is. Now the question you have to answer is, do you want to leave here alive? I am prepared to make you a VERY generous offer! You and your crew can leave here with your lives as long as you give me the XGP and the lovely girl that navigates it."
"What?! You crazy son of a" Gene was interrupted by Spike.
"Hey now, that is a pretty generous offer, don't you think?"
Gene looked at Spike with outrage seething from his dark eyes. Gene didn't realize, however, that while they were speaking to Setsuna, several henchmen had taken up position throughout Tiki Joe's. Spike wanted to alert Gene to this development, so in his very unique way he stood up from the table and gave a false farewell, "Well, see ya, good luck with that," and turned to face the henchmen. As the goons looked to Setsuna for instruction Spike casually walked up to a particularly large one, gave a respectful bow, and walked to the next. There was a loud thud as the man fell over unconscious.
"Get them!" Setsuna howled, but it was too late. The crew of the Outlaw Star and the Bebop were in their natural environment. Liquor flowed freely and women wore very scantily things. The wooden furniture was ripe for smashing over these thug's skulls and the act of doing so came with ease for the entire team. Jet and Jim immediately grabbed the stools they were sitting on, as Spike and Gene took up a back to back stance. Aisha hissed and scratched at her foes, Ed bounced around barefoot running beneath enemy legs, and Ein decided he would pee on a particular perfect smelling leg. Faye helped Melfina hide behind the bar while Suzuka finished her fine glass of sake and saw that the sun was indeed setting. This was a brawl even she felt compelled to join if only to bring back the quiet tranquility she was enjoying not moments before.
When the dust settled, Setsuna was cowering in his lonely booth, shocked at the fact that this powerful group could defeat so many minions. Gene was furious that this scumbag would try to take away his ship and his Melfina away from him. Spike was livid that this coward's fake bounty meant a lack of food and fun on the Bebop. The two looked at each other again, and nodded. They knew they made an unlikely pair but worked together so well. They knew what they had to do.