STATIC

A Raven and Speedy Story

Static, by Kenna

Roy had holed up in his room for the past three days and he was pretty sour about it. Although, there was no one to blame but himself. He was the one who thought it wise to verbally poke Raven. He was the one who had been asking for a strong retort. He should have expected her to react the way he wanted her to, but he didn't expect to feel such remorse about it. It was just supposed to push her buttons, to make her… what exactly?

Make her realize he was alive and breathing, and not the silly, stupid, self-absorbed boy she thought him. Ever since he met her, she had the worst impression of him: the play boy who liked his women and wine. A boy who had his head so far into the bottle that he couldn't see the truth just around the corner.

Parts of it were true. He liked being around women, liked knowing he had the power to turn their hearts to mush. But three years ago he met a dark slip of a woman who saw through his bullshit, she saw all the way to the ache inside him. And it scared him deep. To know that Raven knew more about him in a minute than he had learned about himself in an entire lifetime… stunned him. It made him want to push her away farther than he had ever pushed someone away before.

Roy rubbed the back of his head and sighed, reliving the words he threw at her.

don't know if I want you to understand me…
…or go

"What the deal with a little fun, Raven? C'mon." Speedy leaned against the door frame, looking nonchalant and casual. He knew he looked every part the debonair man he was, dressed in a crisp white shirt and a pair of dark jeans. He had removed his mask, and his eyes glittered like amber in the industrial lights of the tower. "We've been working our butts off all week. I think we've earned a night out."

"Si!"

"Necesitamos una fiesta!"

Raven turned and glared at the twins, then back at Speedy. She shook her head, unaffected by the low gaze he was sending her. "Stop trying that look, it doesn't work on me. And you should stop it anyway, you're a bad influence on the twins." She sighed, but refused to budge from standing in front of the exit. "Look, Bee and Aqualad asked me to look after you while they're in Jump, and I intend to do that. You're just going to have to wait to have fun until they get back before you can have fun. I'm sorry."

"Awe, Rae-"

"Don't call me 'Rae', Speedy."

Speedy continued without even batting an eye at her interjection. "I just think it's stupid for us to hang around the tower when there's so much to do out there. We've put all the criminals in their place, let us have fun."

"No. Now go back and find yourself something to do." She placed a hand on each of the twins' backs and pushed them into the living room. They grumbled for a minute, but plopped down in front of the TV and started playing a game. Raven turned to Speedy. "See, they found other forms of amusement, how about you?"

"Pfft. You're not my mother, Rae. I can do whatever I want." He stared at her, for a long moment, waiting for her to turn and look at him. She couldn't avoid him forever. Something in him was starting to bubble to the surface, and he had better squash it before he said something stupid, something he would regret. "Believe it or not, I'm an adult with the ability to make my own decisions."

"Really? I hadn't noticed." Raven finally turned and raised an eyebrow, glaring at him from beneath the shade of her plum-colored bangs. A puff of exasperated air left her lips. "I never claimed to be your mother. You can go out there and bed all the girls you want, and I wouldn't bat an eyelash."

Speedy's heart fell into his stomach. There was something in him that wanted her to care. He wanted her to yell at him and stand up to him, but she just turned the other cheek and let him do what he wanted, and it annoyed the hell out of him. "Fine, then I'll see you in the morning." Speedy started for the exit, he could hear the sharp intake of breath as Raven was about to say something nasty. He thought it would be wise to cut her off before she spoke. "Although, you should really see a doctor about that personality disorder, I never thought we would ever have a second Robin. I thought one was bad enough, but two! I don't know if I can go on knowing there's two of him in this world."

The room fell silent, and Raven stared at him. The shocked mutters of Mas y Menos came from the living room, and Speedy began to regret what he said, but before he could apologize, Raven responded. "Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot how childish you were. Thank you for reminding me." She pulled her hood up and pushed past him into the hallway. Did Speedy see tears glittering in her eyes? Was it just the light?

"Do what you want, you silly child."

don't know if I want you to see through me
I confess this heavy heart has me on my knees
don't know if I want you to see through me, or go
…or go

Of course her words hurt, but it had never been Roy's intention to shove insults back and forth. She just irritated him then… Roy smacked the back of his head against the wall. This was stupid, he should just go apologize to her, but things made it so complicated. Who was he trying to hurt, her… or himself? He just had to word-vomit everywhere and perpetuate his playboy image… for what? To prove something to her? To himself?

The truth was that Roy hadn't been with a girl in almost a year… he couldn't. Every time he looked at a girl in the bar, all he could see were beautiful amethyst eyes and plum-colored hair. He saw eyes that sparkled with interest, but looked flat to anyone who didn't know how to read them. He saw the wild, undiscovered curves of a woman who had no idea she was enticing and delectable. He dreamed of making sweet, tender love on a bed of lavender.

He was the most foolish person in the world.

"Speedy?"

Roy recognized the husky voice from the hall, and his stomach did a small flip. "Yeah?"

"Aqualad and Bee are back. I'm going back to Jump." It was nothing more than a statement. Something to tell him she was leaving, a road sign. "Have a good evening and I'll see you soon." All politeness and propriety, of course. The words hung in the air for a moment, until there was the sound of receding footsteps, and Speedy felt his breath follow them.

He stood up and started for his still-closed door. What was he doing? "Hey, Rae?"

The footsteps stopped, turned, and grew louder. They finally stopped on the other side of his door. "Please, don't call me 'Rae'." Sigh. "What do you want, Speedy? To insult me some more? Tease me? Ridicule me? I'm finally getting out of your hair, can't you just let it be? You've succeeded in making me miserable, you've won. Now can I go home?"

Her words his dangerously close to her heart and he couldn't help the admission from spilling from his lips. "I'm sorry." There was the hiss of the door opening, and Speedy stared down at her. She looked so small bundled under all of the fabric from her cloak. Something inside him wanted to reach out and push it all off her, to take a good look at what was hidden beneath. "I didn't mean to insult you, I was just… mad. I'm really sorry."

Raven blinked, obviously surprised at his apology. A small smile touched her lips, and he knew he was forgiven. He sent up a silent thanks to the heavens. "Apology accepted." Pause. "Even if it took two days to get it out of you." She chuckled, and the sound touched his ears like music.

"At lease I said something." He leaned against the doorframe and looked down at her, letting his own smile show. Well, they were speaking again, but was that all he wanted? Or was there something more he wanted to reach for? Something more… There was along pause before he gathered the courage to speak again. "Hey, I was wondering… is it alright… if I call you sometime?"

Raven jerked in surprise and took a step back. A menagerie of emotions passed across her face before she settled on confusion. "Call me? Whatever for?"

"To talk."

"About what?" Raven looked even more confused, and the way her lips twitched made Roy want to bend down and kiss them straight. He needed to get his head out of the gutter. What he really needed was to find a way to turn this into a very funny joke, and quick.

"The creation of the universe, of course."

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you writing a book on the subject?"

"No." Roy sighed and shook his head, giving up. What was the point? She wasn't getting his jokes and she obviously didn't get the seriousness of the matter either. "Never mind, Raven… I'll see you later."

Raven looked like she was turning to leave, but something stopped her. She turned back, and Roy swore he saw the beautiful shimmer of emotions in her eyes. There was a long moment before she managed to speak. "Roy." That was the first time she called him by name, and he looked down at her, a little surprised. "I'm an empath, I feel emotions, I make emotions… whatever you feel now…" She turned a beautiful shade of crimson and let her eyes fall to the floor. "Let it go. No one is worth it."

The shocked silence that followed hurt. It hurt Roy deep into bones where he feared he would never get it out again. She knew about him? About his feelings for her, and yet she made the choice to ignore them? To let him suffer in silent torment?

"I see." Roy rubbed the back of his neck, trying to ignore the blackness blossoming in his heart. He wanted to hit something very bad right now. She knew, but she never chose to respond to him, never gave any inclination that she knew the torture he dealt with every day. She never pretended to understand what his personal hell had become. That every breath of lavender sent him crazy, that the color of plums drove him near insanity. She ignored it all. Part of him felt angry at her for not responding to him, for ignoring his demands for so long. He watched her for a long moment before choosing to speak. "How long have you known?"

"For a while." Raven blushed and she turned away, shame lacing her expressions. "Since we first met… since I saw past… this person you're trying to become. This empty façade." She waved her hand at him, and let color rise to her cheeks. "And since you saw past me, and what I was hiding from."

cause it feels like static when you're here
static when you're gone
static everywhere
static every time

Roy frowned, and tried to squash the anger that was surging hotly in his chest. She was just going to turn away from everything they were, everything they could be? She was going to ignore a secret path through life because… of what? Of fear? Disgust with him? He didn't know. He clenched and unclenched his fists, trying to keep from hitting anything. "And you're just going to ignore everything then?" She nodded but said nothing. "Why?"

"Yes." She stole a glance at him and it made Roy hotter because of it. "Because lust is complicated, and love is even more so." Raven let her face become stoic, and she turned to face him fully. "I forbid emotions to rule me. I refuse to let anyone but me decide the out come of my life, and you should too."

He wanted to yell at her to stop spouting off her views on life, but he chose not to anger any more. At least, not yet. "So, it's just an emotion to you?" Roy couldn't keep the red from entering his vision. He tried to clear it, tried to keep his mind focused on what she was saying, but it was hard. It was so hard to keep calm when she was simply disregarding everything he felt, everything they could have felt together.

"A chemical reaction." She tilted her chin up indignantly. "It's noting more than hormones playing tricks on you. A stimulus."

Roy snarled down at her, unable to keep his anger in check any longer. He'd been pushed to insanity, and there was no way for him to come back from the brink. "And do you respond to stimuli, Raven? Do you know what it feels like to have your chest split open and know that she doesn't care?"

Red flashed across Raven's eyes and she glared at him. "Don't test me, Roy."

"I'm not. I know better." He pressed his face close to her own and growled. "I just want to know if your heart is big enough to feel it breaking."

Raven's lips pursed and she blinked once, shock from the strength of his words entering her. She pressed her own face close to his, determined to show she wasn't afraid of him. But Roy knew better, he saw the hurt, the sadness, and the anger starting to boil near her surface. "You are nothing more than a selfish child. I am going home and I hope I never see you again." She turned to leave, but Roy snatched her arm.

"You will see me again, I promise." And without another sane thought, he let his lips fall onto hers.

love come and bless me
show me how it feels
been here time before and it wasn't real
don't know if I want you to understand me or go

Roy wanted to pretend he was in heaven. He wanted to pretend that they had said beautiful words to one another and they fell hopelessly in love. But the truth was brutal. He was brutal. He kissed her near the point of bruising, dragging her small body close to his. He needed to feel her, needed to know that she was real and that this wasn't some sick nightmare.

He shoved her against the wall and lifted her body so that she straddled him. She was so close that he smelled the sweet, fresh lavender that radiated from her skin, and her lips tasted of plums. Roy leaned forward and bit down on her lower lip, nearly drawing blood. Raven let out a cry somewhere between a yelp of pain and a moan of passion. Her hands came up and wrapped around his neck, her fingers buried into his hair and she tugged hard. Roy pulled back and stared into her eyes, his breath coming in ragged draws.

Raven took a few long breaths before she spoke. "You just forgot one thing."

Roy couldn't seem to calm his heart. She looked loved, ruffled and frayed at the edges; she looked perfect to him. "What?"

"I'm a lot stronger than I look." Raven uncoiled her legs from his waist and pushed against the wall. The two went tumbling on the bed in a heap of purple and red. Roy pulled at her cloak, and it snapped off and fell to the floor, forgotten. Raven's beautiful curves pressed against him and Roy was helpless to stop the demands of his body. He ground his hips against her in some weak attempt to ease the throbbing between his legs.

Raven moaned and tilted back her head, allowing him access to her throat. Roy took advantage of her position and let his tongue slide along the underside of her jaw. Her skin even tasked like lavender. He reached behind her neck and tugged at the zipper to her leather suit. It slid down with ease and Roy pulled her body free from its confines. He paused for a moment, allowing him to drink in the beauty of her, dressed in nothing more than a bra and panties.

She looked like his own personal feast, just for him and never to share. He leaned down and pressed his lips close to her ear. "So, what do you think about emotions now, Little Miss Stoic?"

"I think you've reached the end of the line." Raven shoved at his sternum, effectively hitting a nerve. Roy's body was helpless to respond, and he fell onto his back next to her. Rather than turn over and jump her again, he lay there, trying to let his body recover from his high. Trying to clear up what had just happened.

He jumped.

And, for once, there had been a net to catch him.

He turned to her and smiled at the sight. There wasn't a painter n the world who would be able to capture her beauty. Her hair was sticking out everywhere and her lips were swollen with love. Her chest was heaving up and down, begging to be touched. Her plump breasts nearly spilled out into view, and he wanted to smell her skin just once more.

Just to be sure this wasn't a dream.

can't blame you dove when the blame is mine
to love and let go was never the design
don't know if I want you to see through me or go

"I'm going home, Roy." Raven made no attempt at a preamble as she stood up and began to pull on her leather suit. Roy was having trouble paying attention to her words, as there was something incredibly sexy about watching her shimmy into the tight uniform. He could lie here all day and be contented to watch her dress and undress herself. She turned to face him as she zipped up the back. "Please don't repeat this to anyone."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Roy rolled onto his side and watched her fish under the bed for her cloak. She looked so beautiful, her face pink with energy and her eyes shinning like cut jewels. Roy reached out and snatched her slender arm. "On one condition."

A smirk touched Raven's lips, surprising him. "Yes."

"You don't even know the condition yet."

Raven tapped the side of her head. "Empath."

"That doesn't mean you read minds." Roy tugged on her arm and she tumbled back onto his bed. He pressed his arms to either side of her shoulders, and he let severity shine in his eyes. "I haven't been with anyone since I met you, Raven."

She pushed a lock of hair out of his face. "I know."

"You did?"

Raven sighed and turned her face away from him, a frown touching her lips. "I was hoping you'd forget me and go back to your old way." She turned back to him. "I'm a terrible girlfriend, Roy. I'm stoic, plain, ordinary, unexciting, half-demon, a princess to a dark world, and there are times I may not always be able to give you want you want from me."

Roy felt a smile touch his lips, and his heart seemed to melt into a puddle of warm liquid in his stomach. "I know. But, I'm not perfect either. I'm a terrible boyfriend. I'm selfish, conceited, jealous, and I have one hell of a past I keep hidden all the time. I know what it's like to feel like no one will ever… touch you again. That anyone will really recognize who you are again." He leaned forward and captured her lips again. This kiss was gentle, soft and sweet, like Raven deserved the first time.

"So, now what?" Roy whispered against her lips. "Do we just forget this and return to what we were before? Two lost souls not good enough to be loved?" He nuzzled the softness of her neck and frowned. He couldn't imagine having to give up what he had just discovered, but if that's what Raven wanted, he'd let her go… for now. For now, he was satisfied with just a taste.

"I go home." Raven pushed him off her and she stood up, fastening her cloak around her. There was a long pause before she spoke again. "And you come and visit?" She pulled the hood up so he couldn't see the expression hiding in the depths of her eyes.

Roy tugged the hood back down and he tilted her chin up to meet his gaze. Caution and fear were looking right back at him. "As often as you want. Everyday if that'll make you happy." His lips descended on hers and Raven couldn't keep the smile from peeling across her lips.

"I think I'd kill you if I saw you every day."HHhhh

cause it feels like static when you're here
static when you're gone
static everywhere
static every time
every time

Roy watched the T-car speed off into the light drizzle that coated the sky. That stupid car held the only thing Roy had ever wanted to posses. He stood there and watched it for a minute, but was pulled out of his daze by the sound of his phone ringing.

"Hello?"

"So, the creation of the universe?"

even as my demons leave
unsure if I want you to see through me
don't know if I want you to understand me or go
let go
go go...

)O( )O(

That ended up a little stranger than I had anticipated. I'm sure there are al kinds of holes and questions you have, don't try too hard to figure them out. This was just something I wrote for the heck of it, I may rewrite it later. Ja ne!

Xaph!