Hi again guys. Thank you for actually taking the time to read my ramblings. Please leave any constructive criticism- it really helps!
Once again, I do not own the Sherlock characters (though, it would be fun if I actually did…). This fic is basically about Molly and part of my theory for The Reichenbach Falls. Enjoy!
Death has always looked peaceful to me. I see it everyday; I know what happens in the morgue. It doesn't scare me anymore and it doesn't feel like an unknown nightmare. Death brings the end to pain and suffering, to both yourself and those around you. A few years ago I grasped that no one would miss me, because no one cared. No one cared about the quiet one. And that's why I greet death with open arms.
Of course it's hard- I'm covering one of my friend's deaths and in doing so, I'm hurting another. It is plain to see how much pain John is in, and it pains me. I'm keeping a secret that would change his world for the better, and yet I can't speak to him. I know what it's like to lose someone and that it's hard to move on, but he has to. If only I could tell him that Sherlock 'died' for him; to keep John alive. He needs to know that Sherlock is still here, and always will be. He needs to know the full story.
He knows my weaknesses and which bribes will work on me. He has me caught under his little finger; I'm his puppet. I love him, as a friend, and that's one of the problems. If it was anyone else, I wouldn't feel as important. But with Sherlock Holmes, the consulting detective and current pain in my arse, it's different. With him, it's always different.
He trusts me, which is a new burden placed on my shoulders. No one ever trusts me, and with good reason. I'm not the most stable person out there, I'm awkward and I come across as being slightly air-headed. I assure you I'm not, but that's the image I give off. People think that I can't keep secrets, just because I can't keep control over my horrifically clumsy feet. Trust is a new experience for me, and not one I am willing to give up. He trusts me with a secret that his life depends on. If he is expecting to be able to gradually and miraculously return from 'the dead', he needs me to help him by providing accommodation and keeping quiet.
This should be a challenge.