Bella Cullen and deathly hollows?
That's right, I know what you're thinking, what am I doing in a Harry Potter book? Well I'm not too sure, but I think after J. read Twilight she got really jealous of the characters, so I think she stole them from Stephanie Mayer. I think, I'm not quite sure, and I think there's some copyright case going on, but hay! Now we're here, let's see what this storeys all about yeh! Sounds fun right? Right let's get into the action shall we?
"No Bella." Said the voice of Albus Dumbledore, not that I we can see him; everything is really dark 'Cos J.K hasn't placed us in her story yet.
"Stupid mind reader..." now I know why everyone gets so annoyed at Edward.
"Actually you were thinking allowed." Came the voice of Hermione.
"Shut up Blondie." Said Jacob.
"Oh Jacob you're here!" I exclaimed. There was little old me thinking I was all alone.
"Every one's here wait hold still why I try and find you." I could hear Jacob stumbling around in the dark.
"Watch it dog!" shouted Rosalie.
"How stood on my foot!" Ronald Wheasly shouted.
"Oh sorry Ron." Said Edward, "why can't I see anything, I thought we could see in the dark!"
"Ron where are you!" Hermione begged, it sounded like she was crying.
"Ronald, where are you! Boo hoo hoo!" Emmett imitated.
"Shut up! Lumos!" Ron said. But there was no light. "Why didn't that work?"
"I don't think that J.K write the light in so I don't think that we can get light." Albus suggested.
"Good though, maybe we could ask J.K if we can get some light in here." Carlisle responded, he was suppressing similarly minded to albus, suspiciously so.
"Oh, stupid witchy person who hates vampires and werewolf's! Can we get some lights in here?" Alice shouted, presumable at the sky. Then something really surprising happened, the deep booming voice of a woman came out of the air around us.
"Silence!"
"Wtf!"
"Holy shit..."
"I said silence!" came the voice again, this time we done as we were told. "Good."
"Who are you?"
"Did I tell you that you could speak?" the sound of a lightning bolt breaking the air and Jacob screaming filled our ears. The laughter of the Potter "characters" enraged the "twilight" cast.
"When he got all blown up" Ron laughed.
"F*** YOU!" the burnt Jacob yelled.
"Whale fail!" harry shouted.
"Let me at him!" Nessie shouted.
"Silence!" the godly voice shouted. We did as we were told. "Now, let there be light." suddenly light blinded us for a moment, then we realised that we were in a massive, blank white room. It took us even less time to realise that we hadn't asked for cloths. As Dumbledore's shrivelled old ball sack stared at me like a lopsided face I thought to myself, what a silly mistake. Of course not exactly in those words, there was in fact so much swearing that it would be illegal for me to publish it.
***** this scene has been cut out due to an accretive amount of swearing, violence and scenes more like something out of "dead space" or "Grand Theft Auto".
"That's better." Said a blushing Harry, finally getting his clothes on. He was blushing after he and Edward compared "sizes" not that they had a choice, Ginny and I wanted them to just for a laugh. Edward won to his delight. That was when Ginny slapped me and broke her hand, this time it was to my delight.
We looked at each other then.
"What now?" Jasper asked.