Julian took a half step closer, knowing Alexis had no intention of letting him in.
"Come on, Alexis. Please."
His words tore at her the way he knew they would, but he underestimated his timing. She just had too much to lose.
The trial was over, he'd been acquitted. He always was. She couldn't, for the life of her, figure out how it was she still ached to be with him. He was a bastard. A criminal, abusive, self-righteous fuck. He'd done so much hurt to her, her family, her friends. She had no reason to still feel the way she did. But she did.
"There was a time," she said, voice husky and barely audible save for Julian's proximity to her now, "when I would have invited you in."
Julian straightened, bringing his body a few half-inches closer to hers again. She kept her place in the doorway, eyes glued to her shoes, praying she didn't catch a glimpse of the scruff covering his chin. Praying she wouldn't have to look up.
Before he could reply, Alexis continued.
"There was a time I would have opened the door and been happy to see you. A time I would have asked you to come in, to share a meal. A time I would have begged to have your hands on my body, to make me feel so good I could hardly stand it."
Emboldened by her own argument, she finally looked up to catch his eyes and exhaled heavily, less shaky than before.
"There was a time I would have asked you to stay the night, asked you to stay forever. A time you and I were the most dangerous thing Port Charles had ever seen. A time time itself couldn't get you out of my bed."
"Alexis," Julian attempted his interruption knowing a resounding "but" must be on its way. Of course, Alexis had no intention of ceding the floor.
"There was a time I wanted you so much that I would have torn myself apart to make room for you." She paused now, stared steadily at his returning gaze. Then she continued, "Our time has passed, Julian. It's over. Everything we had has come to an end. We're so twisted up now I wouldn't know how to make it back there. And I'm not even sure I want to."
"You can't believe that, Alexis. We can make it through this. We don't have an end, you and me. You can't possibly believe this is it."
She took a ragged breath in, gained a step's-worth of space as she backed away from the door frame, grasping the knob.
"I do," she said. "I really do."