Iwas Helpless

Summary: Freddie had experienced endless bully encounters, many of which included Sam herself. But over the years of being tormented, none measured up to the helplessness he felt at that moment. (Takes Place after 'IQuit iCarly,' Slight tinted Seddie)

Freddie stepped foot into his apartment, which was eerily quiet for some unknown reason. Usually after an episode of iCarly, his mother would await his return on the couch with an eager check of his health, cleanliness, etc.

He then spotted a note on his fridge. 'Fredward, Mommy has gone out to the organics market to pick up dinner. Please sit in your room quietly, finish your studies, and don't play with anything electric, wet, hot, cold, or sharp. With love, Mom.'

Freddie gripped the letter, balled it up, and threw it in a random direction . His mother's overbearing protectiveness only served to throw fuel on the fire.

Stomping through the doorway to his room, Freddie slammed the door and started pacing about. His breathing was shallow and his knuckles clenched and unclenched.

"Why couldn't I…" He trailed off as he stopped his roaming.

After the horrendous event that happened a mere hour before, the group came to a unanimous vote to save the filming until a day or two later when their hearts weren't still beating like they just ran a marathon or five.

Which also gave Freddie some personal time to deal in his own way.

He treaded over to the corner of his room and slid down against the wall.. With his head resting on his knees, the earlier scenario came flooding through his head like a horror movie.

Sam and Carly standing out on the window washer's platform.

A strong cold wind, making them sway to-and-fro.

The platform slowly and ominously sinking down, farther away from him.

A grinding noise and suddenly the platform goes tipsy.

Carly dangling down 13 and a half stories above busy traffic.

Sam sliding down, closer to the death Carly's facing.

Both safe, crawling and pushing their way away from the danger.

A clumsily thrown rope knocking Sam off her feet, and sending her down…down…

Carly pulling Sam back from the brink of demise.

Both being hauled up like fish out of water, the rope not think enough to his standards.

His two best friends, true friends, coming through the window, safe and within arms reach.

The nightmare in his head made the events seem a hundred times worse than they already were. He had already imagined what might have happened had Sam and Carly not been there for each other, or if Spencer hadn't conveniently spotted them and ran in to save the day. Well, save the day was a stretch, considering he had endangered Sam to the point of her dangling off the edge as well.

Which brought Freddie back to his despicable mood in the first place.

Now don't get it wrong. He was beyond thankful everyone had been safe after all, that there was a cheesy hug moment between best friends, and everyone was buddy-buddy at the end.

The only thing he was truly mad at, completely disappointed in and downright loathing at the moment…was himself.

Over the years he was picked on. For having an over protective mommy, for being so into electronics, for being too small, owning too high a voice, wearing the dorkiest clothes. He had endured wedgies, forced tick baths, his face shoved into expired macaroni salad, and being jammed into lockers that would fit just right. Even though most of these events were caused by his mother, or Sam herself, Freddie had thought that was the feeling of true helplessness.

That is, until earlier this evening. When his stomach felt like someone had yanked it out, filled it with cockroaches, and played with it like a yoyo and then shoved it back inside, sending his heart up to his throat. Where his screams tore up his throat, but they weren't coming out nearly loud enough. How his arms stretched out towards his two friends, but couldn't reach them.

That was the feeling of utter, horrifying, helplessness.

He rethought the situation over and over in his head a million times through, and gave himself a mental kick to the shins each time. There were so many outcomes where the experiences didn't have to get so down to the last out.

He could have jumped out there while the platform was still on their floor and pulled one by one in himself.

He could have run as fast as his legs could carry towards Morris, towards anyone.

He could have ordered Fleck and Dave to split up and find some help, while he called up the fire department about their emergency.

He could have called up Spencer even, who had turned out to be the savior towards the end.

But no. He just stood there agape, watching as his friends struggled to hang on with their lives on the line. And all he could do was state the obvious. 'Carly, don't let go!' 'Sam, be careful!' 'NOOOOOOO!' He could hear himself screaming over and over.

He deserved every insult Sam ever threw at him. Spineless, nub face, dish rag, dip thong, moron, idiot, dork, cream puff, all of them and a thousand more. Because tonight, they were all proved to be true. All he did was sit there and watch because he was too scared to move. Earlier he had rationalized that the insanity in his mind kept him grounded there, in case, Heaven forbid, those were his last moments seeing either of his friends alive and un-pancake like. But he knew now, it was because he was a worthless load of wasted space that couldn't handle the moments that mattered.

He remembered the most terrifying moment, the moment that felt the iciest, the second he thought for sure he was about to lose someone close.

As Carly dangled hundreds of feet above the miles of traffic, it was true he felt dread. But some tiny light bulb of hope was shining inside, one that whispered in the back of Freddie's mind that Sam and Carly had been friends, were friends, and would be friends no matter what. So he believed deep down, that as long as Sam was there, Carly would be okay. She would risk it all when it came right down to it. Screw some fight that had 'broken them up' for a day or two. When it was life or death, Sam, out of all of them, was the most level headed.

So he felt a hot and cold feeling pool inside as Sam scrunched towards the edge to pull Carly up from her hanging position. And as Spencer unknowingly challenged her with "You're not strong enough!" he could feel a small, unsure smile tug at his lips as he watched Sam pull Carly up and out of harms way. He had jinxed them, believing they were home free.

And then the rope fell, and the inner ice froze him solid.

Sam had been knocked off her guard, and was sliding towards the edge. His throat tingled as he remembered the screech that had bellowed louder than he thought possible as he watched her. She had barely saved herself, like so many times before, and was screaming for help.

And this time, he felt colder than when he saw Carly hanging there. He knew Sam was strong enough to pull Carly up, heck even himself up, but he was sure there was no way Carly could do the same for Sam. He didn't think heart had anything to do at this point, that sheer strength was what had saved Carly. Maybe that was why he felt his eyes slightly water as he yelled towards Sam's figure.

But Carly surprised him, and probably herself, as she hauled Sam up and into safety for the moment.

That was when the others and himself had been given the job as fishermen, pulling his friends out of the water. He was sure the line would snap, or they just wouldn't be strong enough, but fate had fiddled with his feelings enough that night and had given them a happy ending.

And as he pulled Sam out and held her in his arms for those few short moments, and could smell Carly's overpowering shampoo nearby, he was surprised he didn't join in with the contagious crying as well. That was the biggest relief of his life so far, and he hoped it'd be the last one. Jinx jinx, there he goes again.

He knew there was no way to redo the past. He was that smart at least. But he knew that in the future, if either one was ever in danger like that ever again, he would be a better friend. He would face the gut wrenching fear, and do whatever it takes to keep those two from facing that kind of hell ever again.

Unless it came to his mother. From that point, those two were on their own.

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What d'ya think? Too dramatic? Too much? Too little? Too OOC? Haha tell me whatcha think!!

PS, I think it kinda sets up for iSave Your Life, huh? HUH?! :)