"I hate you Potter, you look like a toad."
Harry raised an eyebrow,
"We should date."
Malfoy just stared, blanched, and stared some more, before uttering,
"What?"
Harry rolled his eyes,
"You're obviously trying to get my attention. Constantly. You couldn't stand that I was ignoring you at the start of the year, and I didn't know why. But now I do. You have a crush (more like an obsession), so I think it would be best if we dated."
Malfoy started to stare again.
"I swear to god Malfoy if you stare any harder your eyes will fall out of your head!"
He blinked.
"But... But... We're enemies."
Harry nodded.
"You're Potter!"
Another nod.
"And I'm a Death Eater!"
Noddies all day.
"And... you're a boy."
Harry nodded before saying,
"Do you think you've covered all bases there? That I am a male enemy? Now that you have that out of your system can you agree that we should date?"
Malfoy stared again.
He was developing an annoying habit of doing that.
Harry rolled his eyes,
"Are you a virgin?"
"What?"
"I'll take that as a 'yes'."
Malfoy's eyes widened and Harry thought he could detect the slightest blush on his cheeks.
"Do you want to wait until marriage?"
Wide eyes.
Harry paused in thought for a moment, tapping his chin contemplatively.
"Do you want to get married now?"
There was a shuttering gasp and fearful expression coming from Malfoy.
"Well if we do get married we can wait. I'm not that pushy because I'm a virgin as well."
Malfoy's face was sufficiently red and flushed, embarrassed by the track of the conversation.
"But, if we do have sex... It might be a bit early to talk about that, seeing as we haven't gone on a date yet. Where should we go?"
"I never said I wanted to date you!"
Harry shrugged,
"I get it. You need some space. I'm not hurt because I know we aren't breaking up, we're just... pausing right?"
Malfoy didn't answer.
Harry gave him a cheeky grin, and a quick wave, turning and walking away, calling out over his shoulder to the bewildered Malfoy,
"I'll owl you!"
Malfoy just stared.