AN: kay, so i got this idea last night on the way home from a basketball game. I as listening to my ipod and reading Deathly Hallows when "I Told You So" by Carrie Underwood came on. Then i got this idea that Lily tries writing a letter to Severus the summer before 7th year. This will be a song fic, so if you don't like it, don't read!
Disclaimer: I (unfortunately) own nothing but my idea. The song belongs to Carrie Underwood and the characters to JK Rowling.
I Told You So
Suppose I called you up tonight and told you that I loved you
And suppose I said "I wanna come back home".
And suppose I cried and said "I think I finally learned my lesson"
And I'm tired a-spendin' all my time alone.
If I told you that I realised you're all I ever wanted
And it's killin' me to be so far away.
Lily Evans climbed the stairs to her room, lugging her trunk and owl with her. She had just go back from Hogwarts and already her sister had started in on her, calling her a freak and ridiculing her. Her parents weren't talking to her much either, not after they found out that she had started dating James Potter, the boy she had constantly complained about the past five years. Lily didn't know what caused her to finally say yes to him. Everyone thought they were the cutest couple in Hogwarts. Well, almost everyone...she thought. No! don't think that! Remember what he called you last year?
But of course, she was lying to herself. It didn't matter what he said to, she would never actually be angry with him. It didn't matter how much he hexed James, or how many angry looks he shot her in class, she would never ever be angry with him. Noticing an owl now perched outside her window, she opened it. She recognized James' handwriting immediately, pulling the note off the owl's leg. She fished around in her pocket for a knut to give the owl, finally finding one.
Throwing the un-read note on her bed, she sat down at her desk, searching the drawers for a piece of parchment and some ink. She could feel the tears building up, but refusing to let them fall.
She found the required objects, and slammed the drawer shut. He owl awoke, and gave her a very annoyed hoot. "Sorry Penn.." she told her snowy white owl.
Placing the parchment on her desk, she dipped the quill in some ink and began writing:
Dear Severus,
Why I'm writing to you is beyond me. I'm not mad about what you said last year. I'm not mad that you didn't bother talking to me all this year. I'm not mad at James for doing the things he does to you. I guess I'm mad at myself. I've let my one true friend go, and I didn't start regretting it until now.
Up until last year, you were the one person that I thought I loved. I told you everything. I still think you know me better than I know myself. No matter what you say or think, I still love you. I always have. Even from the first time we met and you called me a witch and I ran off with my bitchy sister because she said you were a freak.
I don't know if we can ever be friends again. I really wish we could. I love you more than I love James. But it's not the same type of love. I can't explain it. I want to be able to talk to you again. I want to be able to laugh, and cry, and make fun of the stupid Marauders again.
Even when I'm with James, I don't feel as complete as I did when I was with you.
With Love,
Lily
Would you tell me that you loved me too and would we cry together?
Or would you simply laugh at me and say:
"I told you so, oh I told you so
I told you some day you come crawling back and asking me to take you in
I told you so, but you had to go
Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again".
By the time she was done with the letter, she was half in tears. Lily didn't know what to do. She thought she loved James, but now she wan't so sure. She knew she loved Severus, but didn't know how to act on it. She curmpeled the note and tossed it into the rubbish bin. It was simply stupid to think that a letter would solve the problems between her and Sev. So much has transpired that year. A new dark wizard was growing stronger every single day, and some rumors were even that he was recruting students right out of Hogwarts to join his new dark army. She knew Severus was probably one of those who had already joined, and she wished he hadn't.
She contemplated on just going over to his house to see him, but she figured that if she didn't have the balls to send him a letter, she wouldn't be able to see him in person like this.
If I got down on my knees and told you I was yours forever
Would you get down on yours too and take my hand
Would we get that old time feeling
Would we laugh and talk for hours
The way we did when our love first began
Would you tell me that you miss me too
And that you've been so lonely
And you've waited for the day that I returned
And we live and love forever
And that I'm your one and only
Would you say the tables finally turned
Would you say I told you so
Oh, I told you so
I told you someday you'd come crawling back and asking me to take you in
I told you so
But you had to go
Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again
Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again
So Lily Evens quickly changed into her pajamas, tears still pouring down her face. She climbed into her bed, and cried herself to sleep that night. Little did she know that, right outside her window, a Silver Doe stood, staring up at her window, longingly.
A/N: Let me know what you think!!! the ending seemed kind of rushed, but i thought it was okay...R&r! my cat will pee on any flames!
