Farewell, Love
by Julia Cat

It's funny how you always think you're going to live forever. You think yourself a god, ruling over your life in complete control of everything that occurs. You are certain that you are in control of every nanosecond of your existence because you are in control of a body that has existed for as long as you can remember. But memories are mortal, just as the flesh is.

Imagine the shock you feel once you realize that you will not live to see another day. This is the shock I felt just a few moments ago.

The residents of the entire Net are counting down the last nanoseconds of their very existence without even realizing it, And, in a way, so am I. I want to hold onto what I have here but I know that if I am the Net's only hope... I cannot be selfish. I want to live, to continue my life's work.

Hex, you won't survive this. It's a one-way trip. Total fragmentation.

How marvelously unpredictable. I had been hoping there was something the guardian could do without forcing any more loss of life. This city has seen so much devastation, and it seems as if this time it will be my turn to take the final leap.

A virus to cure! Brilliant!

Ironic, isn't it? It's simply delightful that the legacy of Daemon can only by reversed by having a benign virus infect the Net. This was how I was meant to delete; I simply can't resist the temptation to go out in the most improbable act imaginable.

It makes me sad. I have never had a true grip on my emotions until now. I have never fully known what to feel. It has always been so difficult. But now... now I truly feel sad. I know I am accomplishing something wonderful, but I will lose everything there is to lose: my friends, my dreams, my life.

I wish I could have done more with my life. I wish I could have understood everyone more. Before Bob repaired me, I used my chaotic schemes to get closer to the Mainframers, but instead they pushed me away. Especially Dot. I never meant her any harm. I meant it when I had called her sister. I am truly sorry we couldn't understand each other that way I wanted us to. I guess now she will finally have what she has always wanted: Bob.

Bob... I am only doing this for Bob. I want him to be happy. As much as it pains me that he will never love me as I want him to, I would not have agreed to do this at anyone else's request. This is my final expression of love for him. In this final act of complete fragmentation I will delete, but I will always be with him in spirit.

I only wish that things could have ended differently for me.

Farewell.