Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy of Stargate, or even most of the plot for this fic, to be honest. I'm just the person who wrote it.

Andrew's Super Cool New Job

"Giles…?"

"Ah- yes, Dawn?"

"Why is there a pan of boiling water filled with Andrew's action figures on the stove instead of tea?"

"Oh, I'm just doing a bit of cleaning. With my guest gone, I've got quite a lot of clutter lying around my flat. I'm just trying to dispose of some of it."

"…Andrew's gone?"

"Yes, Dawn. Oh, thank God, yes."

"Um- to where?"

"Far away. Very, very far away…"

"…Which is where?"

"Oh, I'm not really sure. Some place on the other side of the galaxy, I suppose?"

"…Are you drunk, Giles?"

"To be truthful, I may be a bit tipsy, Dawn. I have had quite a lot of champagne to celebrate Andrew's new position."

"New position? But Andrew didn't get promoted, Giles. What are you talking--? Wait, did Andrew get a new job? But- he totally loves being a watcher! He's always saying how cool it is—"

"—to train our young padawans to fight the dark side of the force, to go where no men have gone before, to protect the world from devastation; yes, I do recall several of his more enthused asseverations on the subject. Still, with some encouragement, he's decided that it's time to try and move up in the world."

"What? Giles, you kicked him out?"

"No, I did not! I simply let him know about an opportunity that I knew would interest him and left a few hints that I wouldn't mind having a bit more time to myself. The decision was entirely his own."

"Giles!"

"Dawn, you simply do not understand. I just couldn't tolerate having that bloody menace in my flat for one more day, and if I had to send the boy to another planet to get some peace and quiet finally, then I was damn well willing to do it—and if you have anything to say about it, then why don't you offer to host him? I'm sure that if you contacted him now, he'd scamper right back to Rome and happily drive you insane with twenty-four hour long marathons of the X-Files and Battlestar Galactica!"

"…I'm good."

"I thought you would see my point."

"… So… where exactly did Andrew go?"

--------------------P3X-095--------------------

"Thank you, Colonel O'Neill, for bestowing upon our people this great gift. As promised, and as a sign of our eternal gratitude, we will accept whatever negotiations your planet has intended for us."

"You're welcome, Chief. Our people really appreciate it."

"Oh, not nearly as much as we do, Colonel. You have given us our Goddess."

"…Right."

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"May the force be with you, my gentle people! I great you as your new Goddess, the great and powerful-- yet gentle and merciful- and also interesting, funny, and charming--Andrew. I will do my best to protect you and guide you away from the terrible influence of the false gods. These dark beings will no longer be able to hurt you, cherished ones. Let me be your mother, and hold you as my children- close to myself, a part of myself- and I will always love you."

"Hail, Goddess!"

"Oh, you're all too kind."

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Author's Notes: An answer to the challenge "New Job Offer: Goddess" on TTH, although it doesn't follow the guidelines perfectly. I was answering the second option, but instead of having the take that the SGC needed to convince him, it was Giles who got Andrew the job. All dialogue and not meant to be taken seriously, I hope someone got a laugh out of it! Feedback of any kind is appreciated, and if you notice any grammatical of spelling errors I've made, please point them out.