Monday morning, and I have to go to school, isn't that just wonderful? SPOILER ALERT: NO! IT'S NOT! I do not want to get out of my bed this morning, let alone go to school and do what I know must be done. I would much rather just lay here under my wonderfully warm black blanket and sleep the rest of the day, or lay here awake all day as far as I care. I would honestly rather lay here and stare at the ceiling than go and talk to him, the guy who has stuck by me for so long, the guy who I'm usually more than glad to see, the guy who used to brighten my day. My boyfriend, and every girls dream, Beck.
"but Jade!" you ask "if he's so wonderful, why do you not want to go talk to him?" Well I've clearly left out the most important part of todays dread, this "dream guy" has been acting funny for nearly two weeks now. Paying minimal attention to me, not being sure to see me between every class, and I havent seen or heard from him in the slightest all weekend. Something is up, and I've decided that today would be the day that I'm gonna find out what it is, weather I like it or not. And currently it seems I'm leaning towards the not. But I said I was gonna do it, so I will.
I'm on Autopilot as I climb out of bed, realizing the things I'm doing and the reasons behind them but my mind is too preoccupied with todays task to honestly care. I get into the shower, and turn the water on as hot as I can handle, halfway hoping that the feeling of the burning hot water pouring over me will just melt away the worries I have about today, or better yet melt me away all together. Well, apparently people are wrong when they think I'm the Wicked Witch of the West, Just as I myself was wrong in hoping to get rid of my worries. I'm still running on Autopilot as I drive to school, so naturally I flip off 3 idiots and beat on my horn, drowning out the profanities I yelled when i had to sit behind an idiot doing her makeup for half of a green light.
I buy my Breakfast at the school, like I do every day, because, well you don't honestly expect me to cook for myself do you? Usually Beck would be sitting here with me even if he wasn't eating, but not today, or for that matter last Friday or Thursday. But that evasion won't help him for long, I know hes here today, I saw his Car in the parking lot, and theres no way he can or would miss first hour with Sikowitz. A small part of me hopes that maybe he will skip class, that maybe he will have gotten sick and went home already, but I put an end to that thinking immediately, I need to get this overwith today, there will be no putting it off, I know he's here today, and I WILL get some answers today.
Beck never goes to his locker before first hour so I waste no time and go straight to Sikowitz's class, I'm there 5 minutes early, Taking a seat in the back corner of the classroom, hoping that he will be there early too, because theres no way I'm going to attempt to have this conversation whilst sitting in class, with my luck Sikowitz would take it, put it in the spotlight, turn it into an acting excercise, and then I would have to confront him infront of the whole class. No, if he doesn't get here before class I'll just get my answers afterwards.
I probably could have predicted it, but Beck didnt show up early for class, He barely showed up on time. I wonder what he spent the time doing. I know for a fact that he was here before me this morning, I saw his car when I pulled in, and he wasn't arround at breakfast, come to think of it I haven't seen him at all this morning up until right now. He looks, different, not obviously different, but different none the less. His hair seems to draw my eye the most, it looks, well normal, but almost like he was rushing and fixed it without really paying attention, but how could he have been in a rush this morning when he was at school so early. Did he have something else on his mind? Something that kept him from noticing his hair wasnt right this morning? No, this is Beck we're talking about here, I've never seen him leave his RV without making sure his hair was perfect unless he absolutely had to, his hair is possibly one of the most important things in the world to him, so then what happend? Did he have other business to attend to? That would explain why i didnt see him, and why he fixed his hair in a rush, but what other business could he have? I mean sure, there is his trip to Canada he's supposed to leave on tonight, but he told all of his teachers about that weeks ago. Canada, how I dispise the place, I used to think that Beck was perfect, turns out he was hiding one secret from me, he was born in Canada. Perhaps thats a small secret in comparison to what some boyfriends hide, but he knows how I hate Canadians.
Beck takes the seat next to me without saying a word, Sikowitz isn't here yet, leave it to Sikowitz to show up late for a class he is supposed to be teaching. But maybe its a good thing, maybe I will have time to confront Beck. I see him out of the corner of my eye glancing arround the room. What is that look on his face? He looks almost... anxious? It doesnt look like hes paying attention to any of the other students, is he looking for Sikowitz? Does he know what I want to talk about? I don't know how he could but I figure I should get to it before he decides to bail. I turn to face him.
"Beck, I think we need to-" I am cut off by a loud crash in the front of the room, my head turns to see Sikowitz crashing through the window headfirst, this isnt the first time Sikowitz came in through the window, but its deffinately the first time hes ever nearly FLEW in through the CLOSED window. He lands laying on the floor infront of the class, surrounded by bits of the shattered window. There is a bit of what looks like blood smeared on the floor where he slid. All of the other students jump up to check on him, I stay seated, not happy about being interrupted.
"Are you ok? Should we call a doctor?" Thats Tori for you, always the first to freak out. Everybody stands watching. I'm busy wondering when the next chance to confront Beck would come, and halfway hoping that it doesnt. If it suddenly became impossible or unecessary for my to question Beck, that wouldnt bother me one bit. All of the students are freaking out trying to see if hes ok, the problem is when youve got a class full of students, all trying to figure out if a man is ok, and none of them know what they're doing, nothing helpful really gets done.
"GOTCHA!" Sikowitz jumped to his feet and yelled, startling everybody standing near, except Beck of corse who would never let himself be shocked like that. The rest of the class isn't so calm, at least 4 of them jump backwards and trip. Sikowitz whipes a bit of fake blood off his forehead and picks up his coconut drink from the table. "Come on class! Surely one of you must of realized it was break away glass, and of course the blood is fake! How about you Jade? You didnt even move from your seat, i assume you realized what was going on?"
"Truthfully no, I just didnt care, I figure if you come crashing through a window and hurt yourself, then yay, no acting class for me today right?" I was being honest, I didnt really care if he was ok, maybe I would of cared if he died, but otherwise I had been far to preoccupied by my own toughts at the time he came crashing through the window, plus being upset that I didnt get to carry through with my first attempt to confront Beck, who, come to think of it, probably realized what happend but seized the opurtunity to get away from me. No, I'm being paranoid, he got up out of reflex to go check on Sikowitz, thats all.
"Right then class, today we will be doing random mixed acting exercises, seeing as Jade was so unconcerned for my wellbeing, she will not be participating She will instead, forced to sit with me and give her honest opinion on every scene portrayed" Sikowitz doesnt look angry, more like amused, but I cant ever remember actually seeing him angry anyway.
"Oh yay!" I try to sound as sarcastic as possible, really I'm kind of pleased with what happend, it means I wont have to think in class today, this should be easy, I can just sit and wait until the next chance I get to confront Beck.
And I dont think throughout the entire class, I sit back and let myself dissapear into the back of my mind, paying no attention to whats happening before me, when I'm asked what I think my response is always the same "I hate it" and then I dissapear again. I glide through the rest of the period like that until the sound of the bell breaks me out of my trance. I go to get my bag from my original seat, the plan is to chase right after beck and get some answers. I pick up my bag, and next thing I know, my books and possessions are all on the floor, somehow the bottom of my bag just gave out. I start picking up my stuff, and when i see somebody bend down to help me, its not Beck, like I would of expected. Instead, its none other than Tori Vega, why is this chick always helping me when I've been nothing but mean to her? It doesnt make sense! With all my stuff gathered in my arms I set off out of the room without a second glance a Vega, let alone a thank you. Glancing arround the hallway I dont see Beck anywhere. What a good boyfriend, doesnt even stick arround to help me pick up my stuff, and then takes off out of sight as quickly as possible.
I go dump my stuff into my locker, and start out on my own little personal man hunt for Beck, my first place to check is his locker, being the obvious place to look for him first. It would have been easy enough to find even if I didnt know where it was. Everybody decorates their locker different, Becks locker is decorated with a picture of an empty locker painted onto the front of it. A quick glance confirms hes not there, so the next place I check is his next class, no dice, think Jade think! Maybe he's in the bathroom? I grab Sinjin by the arm and drag him to the mens bathroom.
"go in there now and look for Beck!" now is not the time for asking, it's the time for commands.
"why should I? I'll do it for a kiss"
"How about you do it so i dont snap you like a twig?" I've been thinking about doing that lately anyway, this guy gets annoying, and if there were another boy in sight I deffinately wouldnt have chosen him for this job.
"How bout a hug?"
"HOW BOUT YOU GET TO IT BEFORE YOU FIND YOURSELF MISSING A PINT OF BLOOD!" Sinjin runs full speed into the bathroom and comes out mere seconds later.
"there's nobody in there at all" I give a slight jump at him making him run away
where could that boy have went? I swear i've checked every inch of this school, and its like he just dissapeared, and I only have a couple of minutes until the next bell, I need to find him and FAST! I'm walking by the janitors closet when I hear a bang on the door. "What the hell is that?" Maybe Vega dragged Cat in there again? I wonder what the problem is this time, it seems Vega is always draggin somebody into the closet, like Its the only place to solve problems in this school. Well, so long as I know where shes at, why not take advantage of Vega and her seemingly endless kindness?
I walk over and pull the door open, I dont care what Vega might be busy with, this is more important. But what I see inside isn't nearly what I expected. Inside the closet, rather than Vega and Cat, I see Beck, and some girl I dont even recognise, and they're full on making out. Hands running through each others hair, eyes closed, not even aware that I'm here or that the door just opened, I feel my blood run cold.
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!" I feel like asking wasn;t enough, I yelled at the top of my voice. Beck is unphased, the girl however jumps away out of fright. Beck turns to face me, I want to rip both of their heads off and send them floating down a creak, I want to make sure neither of them see the light of day ever again. But mostly I just want this not to be happening, I want Sikowitz to jump out and say "GOTCHA!" And I want him to congratulate them on good acting. But none of that is happening, none of that is gonna happen. Beck looks at me, without the slighty glint of remorse in his eyes, he speaks plain and clear, like hes telling me he ran out of milk.
"Hey Jade, bad news, it's over" and he shuts the door in my face, is this really happening, could the man who I thought loved me for two years really just blow me off that easily? This expains everything, it explains why hes been so distant, it explains why I havent seen him all weekend. It even explains why I didnt see him this morning and why his hair looked so messy, it was because that little gank had been running her hands through it all morning. I go to my locker and pull out my broken bag, the bottom of it didnt rip out, it had been slit, I guess thats what I get for spacing out in class, he took the opurtunity to sabotage my stuff and give him a chance to get out of my sight. I want to run and hide, but unfortunately Beck already occupies the best hiding spot in the school.