I scanned the want ads in the New York Times for anything but flower shops. Never again, not since that incident. Still, I wanted to get out of the gutter. To do that, I had to find work. I had been scanning the page for about an hour when I noticed an ad with a creepy bear.
"Family Pizzeria looking for security guard to work the night shift 12 a.m - 6 a.m. Monitor cameras, ensure safety of equipment and animatronic characters. Not responsible for injury or dismemberment. $120 a week."
One hundred and twenty dollars a week was still better than nothing. Luckily, I found a phone on the wall of the basement. I called the number listed on the ad.
"Hello? I'm calling about the ad in the newspaper."
"Oh, I didn't think anyone would call about that. The injury or dismemberment bit usually drives most potential workers away. If that's not a factor, it's usually the terrible weekly payment. Anyway, feel free to come to the place tomorrow."
"Okay, see you then."
I was finally about to get a job that wouldn't involve any more plants.