Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I do not own Spiderman, Iron Man, or any other character in here. I do not own the fanfictions which inspired some of my fanfiction..
*In the Naruto universe*
"So, you want to become a ninja, Naruto? It won't be easy. You will have to work hard, and mature a lot. And you will be younger than your classmates. Do you have what it takes to become train hard enough to match older aspiring ninja without giving up?" The Hokage's face was stern, stern as Naruto had ever seen it.
"Yes! I will become a ninja, believe it!" Came an enthusiastic reply from a young, orange-clad kid.
It's possible he'll be another Itachi, rising to be a powerful ninja quickly. But he has to get focus in order to do so. He can already catch chunin with his traps, and he got that good due to taking up pranking to alleviate boredom. Mused the hokage, puffing on his pipe.
"Good then. I'll enroll you into the ninja academy, and you can go to classes starting next month, on the 9th." He rummaged around in his drawer as he said that, bringing out a marker and a calendar with the aforementioned date already circled. He used the marker to make a cross on the current day. "Put a cross every day until you reach the 'll have to properly learn to read soon, so I've arranged for an instructor in the academy to teach you"
"Yatta! Thanks jiji, I wont let you down!"
*In another universe entirely*
Mike twitched suddenly, arm automatically flailing out to get the phone and turn off the alarm.
Thunk!
Grumbling at dropping the phone, Mike got up to get the dropped phone. He was on the top bunk, and he always was clumsy when sleepy, so it was no surprise he tripped off and fell when he was halfway down.
THUNK!
"Keep it down, I'm trying to sleep here!" Your new roommate snarled out, obviously annoyed. Well, I did keep him up late from the light when I was gaming... Mike was no pro gamer or gaming nut, but he played every now and then. He was no casual, but he was not willing to give gaming more time than socializing or schoolwork. He usually just stayed up at night to play, and took pride in his skills.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm on it..." Mike turned from his position on his back on the floor and reached for the phone. The bright light of the phone and loud noise of the alarm stung his eyes and ears, as if they were calculated to do so. They really were. Damn why am I so good at torturing myself? I really am a bastard. Mike accidentally snoozed it instead of turning it off, so he opened it, wincing at the brightness and turned it off.
Mike wearily stood up, picking up his toiletries bag, the change of clothes he prepared the day before, his towel and marched for the bathroom.
As the door closed behind him, he muttered "My first day at college, and so far it's the same as high school. Let's see what the day brings next!"
*Third Person POV, on a higher plane of existence - The real world*
People went about their days, unaware of the power that that their every thought had. Every time any one of them had a thought, their souls reached into the lower planes of existence, manipulating the energies there and giving birth to concepts, worlds or substances that reflect the thoughts that created them.
One such person, just going about his day, had a thought: "What if a human from our world suddenly woke up as Naruto? Then what would happen?"
It was not an uncommon thought, but this particular thought brought a certain two universes to interact.
The person continued musing about it, bored as hell, and as he did, the universes' interactions changed. once, he noticed a discrepancy in what he was thinking, and changed his mind on that point. As he did, the universes instantly changed as if they were being molded in that very way since the beginning.
*In Mike's world*
Mike made a kissy face, smooching the air. A girl sitting a few seats over flushed, and the guy next to her rolled his eyes "Please, Mike, you know it's not like that. We're just friends!"
"Of course you are" Mike practically sang, eyes shining with mirth. The other two sitting between them snickered.
Suddenly, Mike was flying. No, that was his own head he could see right below him, chuckling at the 'just friends'. What...? Before Mike could continue that thought, he suddenly disappeared, leaving... himself chuckling with his friends.
*Naruto world, Konohagakure*
A boy, no older than 12 jerked upright in bed. What's going on? He thought. Wait, where am I? Oh right, this is my bedroom. Wait, why am I here? Wasn't I just in class? Oh right, I went to sleep yesterday after my training session. Obviously I'm still in bed, I just woke up... But... Why was I training? Yeah, for the pre-final exams tomorrow! SHUT UP BRAT! WHAT DID YOU JUST DO! THAT HURT LIKE HELL!
"WHAA! Who said that! Who's there?" Mike- no, Naruto looked around, searching for the speaker. Wait, It's Mike, not Naruto! No, it's ... What?
I AM THE KYUUBI NO KITSUNE, BRAT! I WAS SEALED INTO YOUR STOMACH BY THE YELLOW SEALMASTER MONKEY! AND YOU HAVE EARNED MY IRE! WHY DID YOU MERGE YOUR SOUL WITH SOMEONE ELSE'S? AND HOW DID YOU DO SO?
"...What the hell... I'm dreaming. A stupid, headache-inducing dream... No way I'm Naruto. Even if I am Naruto... But you can't feel pain in dreams, and my headache would have woken me up... Then, there's no way that I'm Mike... A world without chakra, but so few wars and with such technology? Impossible! But even then, th-" SHUT UP, BRAT! YOUR NOISY RAMBLINGS ARE IRRITATING! TELL ME HOW AND WHY YOU MERGED YOUR SOUL WITH THIS... MAIEKEH'S SOUL!
"It's Mike, stupid! Is that so hard to say! And I have no Idea what you are talking about. I didn't merge my soul with anyone's! Now, if I actually used to also be Mike, then I can come in and talk to you if I want to... How do I do that, fox?"
I DON'T KNOW AND I DON'T CARE! IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN, I WILL MAKE YOU REGRET IT!
"HAH! Try it, fox!"
Mik-Naruto sat down to think about his situation. Ok, until I've resolved this, I'll tentatively just act like Naruto existed and Mike was a dream. Now, the fox said something about soul merging... Aha! So I literally used to be both! This also explains the way I saw myself laugh with the others just now! Okay, so what can I do now? I have an exam tomorrow - a pre-final exam. There actually is no such exam, but Iruka-sensei wanted me ready a week in advance, so he's going to take an extra exam. Next, I still want to be the Hokage! And- Hinata! how could I be so blind! I literally needed someone from another world to tell me she likes me! Dammit! She's a precious person from now on! And she could have been the person who gifted me these goggles too! I'd found them boxed on my doorstep for my 8th birthday! That... was the year I helped her with those bullies and she followed me around a bit after that...
Naruto smacked his fist into his palm determinedly.
And now, for the basics... My parents were- "HOLY SHI-" Naruto clamped a palm over his face before he could continue and shout out a literally S-class secret. But jiji said that my mom was alive and with me until I was a month old... None of the fanfics said so! She's supposed to die of a claw from Kyuubi saving me! Could it be she's still alive? If this was a fanfic I was reading, this would point towards her being alive! But then again, this is real, not a fanfiction. It is actually probable that she was kidnapped or killed. Konoha was rather weak after the end of the attack, and Danzo, Iwa and possibly the other villages, too could react in time... Danzo is positioned in Konoha after all, even Kurotsuchi can use that whatchamacallit weightlessness technique when Naruto is 12 so there probably is someone capable of using it properly when Naruto is born, and other villages also probably have their own fast transportation tricks. I need to look into this... Next, no siblings. This is obviously not canon...
Next, the genin exam and Mizuki... Still gonna go through it. Shadow clone is my greatest technique, and I can see so many uses for it! And my Henge is unfortunately just polished, not physical. (Then what about the wave mission, when Sasuke throws me at Zabuza? The anime and manga explicitly say that Sasuke used the Demon Wind Shuriken: Windmill of Shadows technique on Naru-me? Ehh I'll see about it later.)
Next, the genin exam and Mizuki... Still gonna go through it. Shadow clone is my greatest technique, and I can see so many uses for it! And my Henge is actually physical, not polished! Ohh boy this is gonna be fun! and I'm definitely remaking Harem no Jutsu! It may be perverted, but this is the real world, and If I meet a pervert, I will use this as a distraction technique. Even a second's time is enough to turn an unpolished, non-battleworthy technique into an asset!
And I'm definitely learning earth armor to make my clones are stronger! If possible, I'd put them in something like Iron Man's suit, but I'm no Sta-No, Fuuinjutsu can probably be used to make repulsors – and Naruto, now me is a natural with those! And while I'm at it, I could borrow from spiderman and use webs! With fuuinjutsu, I can have infinite ammo for the webslinger – well infinite besides how much I can produce to stuff in there. Well, maybe not; I have no idea what the limits of fuuinjutsu are. While I'm at it, which other comic book hero can I rip off? Or well, even other anime and manga aren't off limits by any means... Oh hey, maybe I can rig something up to transmute air to web or something... And a fire chakra - based gun! And the methods of using chakra to boost the body from fanfics – What were those? Hmmm, one was constantly flowing chakra through the body, starting small and that also increases the body's resistance to buttloads of chakra. Then another was infusing chakra into cells for better functioning and/or to increase strength and endurance and maybe speed. I don't know it that is suitable as a short-term technique or a long-term technique... And another one, tree walking! Too much chakra causes an explosion and I have boatloads of the stuff! Meaning that I can use explosive punches! Or maybe using lemons and copper to make a battery, which can be used to prank someone! That'd be soo embarassing! In fact, Mizuki fucked up my taijutsu so much that he deserves it!
Nodding, Naruto stood up and ran out the window to prank him. Only to climb back so he can brush his teeth, bathe and have breakfast before he jumped back out. It was only halfway to the academy where Mizuki was definitely grading papers when he realised he forgot his keys. And left the window open. The last time he did that, the villagers had pelted the inside of his home with tomatoes! And someone threw a few rolls of toilet paper. No idea what that was about Either way, back then he had bribed his ANBU tail for the day into cleaning it for him by promising a week free of pranks. "Ohh maan! Medukosai!" He grumbled at being denied the right to embarrass Mizuki ASAP and turned back to deal with it.
A/N:
FYI, the part where it seema like I was writing something and then changed my mind, rewrote it and forgot to delete the last one - that was the retcon mentioned in the 'Real World' part of this chapter
Also, Medukosai means "What a drag" and is Shikamaru's tagline as much as Dattebayo/Believe it is Naruto's. It is replaced by Troublesome in the english version of the Manga/Anime (Although I'm not 100% on that - I only watched the english dub until the first test in the Chuunin exam arc [Whoo boy doesn't that phrase remind you of a certain Fanfic guys? Comment down below If you know what I'm talking about])
I will use the following from japanese:
suffixes:
-chan (Used for people that are close to (usually) the speaker, and either younger or female. Apparently also used for cute kids of either gender)
-san(Neutral suffix. Implies that both are on the same or similar enough level in age/society/respecedness/standing/rank/etc...)
-sama(Respectful suffix used for superiors, elders, respected people, etc.)
-kun (Used for close people where -chan is not used, but rpughly same meaning)
-sensei (used for teachers. Is also a standalone word meaning teacher. And also apparently doctors.)
Prefixes:
-jiji (Grandfather)
-baa(Grandmother)
-tou(Father)
-kaa (Mother)
-nii (Brother)
-nee(Sister)
o- (respectful addon for the preceding (okaa = respected mother))
Really, just stuff that anyone who watches anime often enough can tell you. Also, names of villages will be this way as well. Calling it 'Leaf village' does not have quite the same feel that konohagakure does. If you don't want these, you can copy the fic, use a Ctrl+h in word and replace each suffix and prefix with nothing and then convert jiji to gramps and baachan to grams (those two are only used for third and fifth hokages (i.e. Hiruzen, the 'old man' and Tsunade of the sannin))
EDIT: I honestly don't know what I was thinking when I posted this. I didn't spellcheck or grammarcheck (After all, in creative writing, I have found so far that one of the biggest challenges for the unprepared is getting ideas down, and doing that way that they are understandable. I usually just keep on imagining the story in my head, my hands automatically just typing away in accordance to my mental movie. This leads to spelling and grammar errors at times, especially as I think in 3 languages at once and have to translate to a single language before using them...) )
-Info on my Grammer-
Also, FYI I write stuff the way I would say them, so in situations like this:
I DON'T KNOW AND I DON'T CARE! IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN, I WILL MAKE YOU REGRET IT!
Notice there is no comma after DON'T KNOW ? Yeah, I honestly don't know about the grammar, but that's how I write. If you don't like it / think it's distracting, write so in the comments / Private Messages. If I get enough people who don't like it, I will go eat a few grammar books I guess...
Also, I will not listen to anything about american/british spellings; whether it should be realise or realize; armor or armour, etc. I use both, and people in the world use those, so both are fair game.
-Mini rant about what are words and what are not-
And guys, regarding "pseudo-words" like gonna, If it has a meaning,and people use it, it's a word. Here's the definition of word:
a single distinct meaningful element of speech or writing, used with others (or sometimes alone) to form a sentence and typically shown with a space on either side when written or printed.
So there.