This is another one of my awesome roleplays that I just couldn't keep one on one anymore! I'm doing two roleplays with this person, but this is my favorite. The rating will stay M due to rape in the like, first paragraph. This is a Hiei X Kurama between me and He's an awesome roleplayer and he agreed to allowing me to post this. So thank him fangirls. Oh, and for all of you adding me to your favorites and such, I thank you even more cause that's really nice of you! Keep reading!

Chapter 1

A Tainted Child

He was covered in dry blood that caked most of his body and his cloak. Where in hell was he? Heh, that must be it; he was in hell. The pain was so immense he could barely keep himself conscious. Parts of his body felt like they were frozen solid, ripped to shreds, and burning all at the same time. He could barely remember what had happed.
"Insolent little rat! get 'em!"
The voices of those demons rang in his head. They were the ones who had done this to him...they were the ones who...
"No! Let go of me!"
He remembered his own fear and frustration as they held him down and took their turns. The things they had done were so disgusting, vile, they tainted him, and now he could never return to the Fox. The Fox would surely banish such an impure thing as him.
The men had raped him, and then tried to kill him. He was lucky he'd escaped, and finding shelter was his number one priority. Looking around he spotted a small cave behind a waterfall. Perfect. No one would look for a fire youkai THERE.
He entered the cave carefully and collapsed into the shadows. He was tired, and he needed rest.
Sleep over came the poor little demon and he drifted into an abyss of nothingness as he closed his eyes and allowed himself to lose all ties to the world of the wake.

The fox had been wallowing in guilt for a while now. He had been acting miserable and Yusuke and Kuwabara hadn't said much.
His red hair glistened as he sat on the top of a waterfall. The water sprayed up in his face. His green eyes were distant, thoughtful.
The sun was just rising, creating a pink and purple painting on a canvas called the sky. The clouds were purple, and the sun was a hazy orange. The rose in his hand was half wilted, due to his current depression.
How could he have done that? Was Hiei disgusted with him for being gay?
He allowed himself to wander, ending up wandering into a cave. It was dark.
'You're not alone' Yoko informed him. Yoko is the demon spirit that's been his guide ever since he was born. He headed the warning and looked around.
"Hello?" He called into the darkness.

"Hello?"
The Little Demon heard someone calling to him but could not wake himself up, he was in too much pain and he was far too tired, so he made no attempt to respond to the creature, considering it could have been one of those demons. He could be wrong, couldn't he? Perhaps it was someone who would help him? No...no it couldn't be. No one would help such a vile creature as him, a tainted child. A tainted child...
"No! You killed my son!"
The voice echoed in his head. The voice of his poor mother, reaching so desperately for him as that woman let him drop into the clouds and down to earth. He had willed himself to safety, willed himself to live, so that he may some day return and wreak revenge against those who have forsaken him.
Was it truly revenge that he wanted? No... he wanted love, to be accepted by someone.
Images of the Fox flashed in his mind. What a liar. How could he say he loved him, no one did, no one could... Or was the Fox that forgiveness that the poor little youkai has been seeking all his life? Perhaps...
If he lived through this ordeal he would return to the fox...no...he couldn't return like this. He was now more tainted than ever and he was sure that his Fox would banish him, like everyone else, the way of the world.

'Far back, in the shadows.' Yoko specified. 'Be careful. I think he's around A class...'
Kurama sighed. He kept his red rose at the ready. The rose was his weapon, his shield and his friend. He was a plant lover and that couldn't be helped.
He walked deeper into the cave. "Hello?" He called again. The blackness made it hard for even him to see.
He wondered if it was some kind of night creature that was back there. He contemplated turning around but his curiosity was intense.
For some reason the air in the cave was not threatening at all. It was almost...sorrowful. His eyes looked around, but the adjustment to the light didn't even help the blackness.
Then, in the shadows he could sense him. Another demon.
He got close and knelt down on one knee, trying to examine the small, curled up mass. It was black, but it seemed scared. He gently reached his hand out to stroke this demon's face. If it was going to do harm, he figured it would have done it already.

He awoke as soon as he felt something run across his cheek. He'd smacked the creature's hand away in fear of being taken yet again. He could not allow such a thing to happen again.
"GET AWAY!" He screamed as he stood with his sword out and his back to the wall. He was acting first and he would think later.
"Don't touch me!" Because it was so dark he was still unaware that the one who had found him had been the Fox, and that he had meant no harm. All he knew was that whatever was there was at least an A class demon, and if he wasn't careful it could easily kill him off, or do whatever else it may want to do.
He was growling quietly, if the creature tried anything he would be forced to kill it, but was he able to? He barely had enough energy to stand, let alone kill an A class demon!
In his mind he called himself a coward, scolding himself for being so fearful of whatever had joined him in his hiding place, but he couldn't allow himself to be tainted further. If he allowed it to happen again then there truly was no going back.

The sudden reaction had made Kurama jump.
"GET AWAY!" It had screamed. It had also pulled it's sword on him.
He recognized the sword, the way it shined, and the voice. But how could it be? This thing was scared, and shaky. The one he was thinking of was usually strong and apathetic. There was a difference. But could it truly be?
He stood slowly, as to not make this demon any more jumpy then it actually was. He placed his rose back within his hair and gently held up his arms. He needed to test his theory.
"I put down my weapon, there is no further need for an unnecessary attack. I know you are afraid and I come not as a threat, my friend. What brings you to this state, Hiei?"

The creature was saying it had put away his weapon, and that there was no need for attack, but he did not lower his sword. He had to protect himself or he would be taken again.
I know you are afraid, and I come not as a threat, my friend.
My friend? Was it truly the fox? Well, whoever it was clearly knew his name.
What brings you to this state, Hiei?
Yes...it was the Fox. He shoved himself into a corner and sat once again. Ignoring the fox's questions he let his sword clank to the floor, to signal he had also dropped his weapon.
He could not allow himself to talk any more. His voice was raspy, and if he wasn't careful the Fox would figure out that he had been broken, tainted, and the Fox would banish him, as all others had done before. As all were bound to do in the future.

Kurama heard the drop of the sword. He heard the movement to the corner. It was, Hiei. What had done this? What had brought Hiei, the strongest and most strongest willed person, to hiding in corners?
Something truly bad must have happened, and it racked at his heart. It felt as if a hand was clutching at his very soul, twisting, twisting, churning. It hurt. It hurt to see Hiei in this state.
He knelt down once again, close enough to see Hiei, without causing discomfort. "Speak to me, my friend...what harmed you? Why are you like this?"

He heard the Fox walk toward him and kneel nearby. He wasn't coming close...was it because he didn't want to cause him discomfort? No...the fox didn't want to be near him any more, did he?
"Speak to me, my friend...what harmed you? Why are you like this?"
"Hn. Harmed? Nothing harmed me, fox." He replied, looking to the side. He was trying to keep himself from allowing his voice to crack the way it wanted to, but it wasn't working very well.
His throat was throbbing, along with every other part of his body. He wondered silently how many bones had been crushed while the demons had their fun with him … at least four. He had struggled as hard as he could, kicked and screamed, but it was no use. He truly was a pathetic little wretch. He should have let those demons kill him.
He should have let them rip out his heart like they had tried to do, that way he couldn't feel the pain of Kurama's lies.

Kurama sighed. Hiei was in fact hard to work with. He'd have to force him to tell him anything, but he felt all of this was to his fault. Hiei wouldn't have left if he hadn't said anything. It caused the fox's head to drop, looking to the ground.
Hiei's voice even sounded hurt. Why? Why must it be this way. He felt alone, even with Yoko guiding him like a brother. It was something that wasn't what Kurama needed. He needed love, care.
Right now the poor fox felt like he didn't deserve this demon, he'd caused so much pain. "I know you're hurt, my friend, and I insist upon helping you. Are you going to cooperate?"

The fox sighed...he truly didn't want to be near him...and then he dropped his head...he was watching the ground? What for?
I know you're hurt, my friend, and I insist upon helping you. Are you going to cooperate?
The fox wanted to help him? Was it all a part of his lies? It must be. Why one earth would the Fox want to help him? Maybe it wasn't a lie...Maybe it was truth. Maybe the Fox really was the forgiveness he had been seeking all along.
"Hn." It was the only reply he could allow himself to give. He wasn't quite sure whether or not he should cooperate. Could he trust the Fox? No, no he couldn't trust him. He couldn't trust anyone. "No. I need no help Fox, just leave me be."

"No, I will not leave you be. My offer to help you was not a suggestion, it was me saying what I was going to do. The part about you being cooperative, my friend, was an option. But that does not mean I will not help you. It just means I will have to try harder. Now, where does it hurt?" Kurama said, reaching out to gently touch Hiei's stomach.
He was truly saddened by this change. It hurt...it definitely hurt. And to just add it was his fault... He wanted to help the best he could. So maybe, he could help. He hoped, he wanted to help. He wanted to be Hiei's fox...he wanted him to be close. But he needed to focus on the here and now.
He applied a little pressure. "Does this hurt?"

No, I will not leave you be. My offer to help you was not a suggestion, it was me saying what I was going to do. You being cooperative, my friend, was an option. But that does not mean I will not help you. I just means I will have to try harder. Now where does it hurt?
He looked away from the Fox, glaring at the wall and refusing to answer his question.
When the fox realized he wasn't getting an answer he applied pressure to the little demon's stomach.
Does this hurt?
Immediately the little demon knew that his rib had been broken during the struggle with those demons, and he curled up, holding his stomach and whimpering in pain. He felt ill, it hurt so much.
"D-Don't touch me..." He stumbled over his words as he curled up, holding his stomach and glaring at the ground.

Kurama took his hand back. Hiei's current condition was worse then he thought. He sighed. He needed more light.
Slowly he took Hiei into his arms. He knew the little demon had told him not to touch, but like he had warned, he wasn't going to let the demon struggle.
He lay Hiei down near the entrance, still in the shadows a bit, but where Kurama could see properly. "Now, I will have to get at you Hiei, but I assure you I do not wish you any harm." He slowly took off Hiei's cloak, and his shirt as well.

He watched the fox take his hand back and sigh. He took the little demon into his arms and carried him to the entrance, where he had enough light to see him.
The little demon squirmed, being fearful of being restrained.
The fox told him he's have to get at him...what the hell was that supposed to mean?
He hadn't meant to allow it, but when the Fox took off his shirt and cloak he hit the fox away and moved a bit toward the entrance, his eyes dilated slightly.
"I said don't touch me!" He shouted, holding his stomach again. Now the fox would surely want to send him away, he'd actually hit him! He hit the poor fox, and the fox hadn't even done a thing wrong!

Kurama hurt, yes. The strike had been hard, but not enough to hurt him into stopping.
Hiei had moved toward the entrance further. He stated once more that he wasn't to touch him.
"Hiei, I said I would not hurt you. I know you are in pain, but I know you can not heal on your own without proper care." Kurama said, standing and scooping Hiei once more into his arms. "Now stay."
He took off his own shirt, making sure to continue a hold on Hiei, despite the little demon's struggles.
He walked with him and ran his own shirt under the waterfall, then placed Hiei down where he'd put him before.
"You can strike me as much as you wish, my friend, but I refuse to let your condition worsen."

The fox restated that he wasn't going to hurt him, and that he wouldn't heal unless he took care of the wounds. Then he scooped the little demon into his arms.
"Let go!" He yelled, trying to kick him as he struggled to get away. He didn't want to be restrained, he was afraid of being taken again.
The fox took of his own shirt and took Hiei to the water fall, wetting the kimono. He put Hiei where he had been before and told him he could strike him again if he wished.
Hiei only backed further into the cave, whimpering and holding his stomach. His main goal was to get to where there wasn't enough light for the Fox to see him any more. He didn't want to be near the entrance...those demons would find him. He didn't want to be restrained...he was still afraid...
If he let the fox take care of him...the Fox would realize what had happened. He would find out he was tainted, impure.
"I said don't touch me, Fox!" He backed a bit further into the cave. It was getting darker and darker. He couldn't let the fox see, he just couldn't.
"You killed my son!"
"Do not pity the beast!"
"He's a monster!"
"He'll kill us all some day..."
The voices echoed in his head as he backed further into the cave. He wished he could make them stop, just make everything stop. Was he losing his mind? He wasn't to sure. How could he be sure?
"Live and return someday..."
"Take my life, it's the only way I can atone for what I have done to you!"
That woman...Ryui...she was so sad...he wondered why as he backed deeper into the cave, still watching the fox.

Kurama was following him into the cave. He understood why now. The little demon truly didn't want him to touch him... Maybe... Maybe it was because of what he had told him. Maybe it had ruined his chance... He stopped following Hiei.
He was now fighting the battle of Kurama versus the tears. And for the first time, he lost the battle. He was happy they were standing in the shadows where Hiei couldn't see the droplets trickle down his perfect features. The tears had finally penetrated his smile; the one thing that he always had to ensure no one worried about him. But that shield was gone and he was crying. The water was escaping the corners of his green orbs.
He gently wiped the tears away with his arm, and hoped not to choke on the words.
"Alright, my friend. Have it your way. If you insist upon not allowing me to help you, then at least let me help without contact." He tossed him the wet kimono, sitting a ways away and drawing his knees close. "At least clean yourself of blood..."
He had failed once more. His voice was full of the same sorrow that wet his cheeks, just not as bad. He didn't want Hiei to see him cry...

The fox's voice was filled with sadness. He had hurt the fox...hadn't he? His hate for himself grew and he threw the kimono back to the Fox, plopping on his ass and curling up. He felt something run down his cheek, and heard a small clicking noise when whatever it was hit the ground.
Picking it up he realized what it was as more of them fell to the floor. Tears. He was...crying! He felt himself begin to shake and let out a quite whimper as more and more of them fell.
He hadn't meant to hurt the Fox, he hadn't meant to make the theives stop trusting him, he hadn't meant to be born a male. It had all just happened! It wasn't like he wanted to hurt everyone!
She's dead, the loss of her son was too much for her to bear and she killed herself soon after he was dropped.
It wasn't fair! His mother's death had been his fault! She had died from sorrow because of him! Did that mean the Fox would die too? Did those tears man the Fox was going to die? Was he himself going to die? He sure as hell hurt enough to say he was dieing...but he couldn't let the Fox die, especially not if it was his fault.
"Don't leave." He managed to use the same apathetic tone he's always had, and he wondered silently how he'd done it.