(I don't own Power Rangers, I don't own but came up with this idea when I saw the following letter:
Dear science teacher,
Having an anonymous question box during the sex unit is just an invitation for us to compete to see who can make the classroom atmosphere the most uncomfortable
Sincerely ,
Your immature students
ENJOY!)
"Okay Guys so I just want to say congratulations for making it through this week with maturity, it's not an easy subject I know. So now we are going to open the discussion up. At the beginning of the week I presented you guys with a shoe box and asked you to put any question you have about sex in it, I will answer the questions the best I can. So to start we have really guys? 'How do mermaids reproduce?'"
"Well it's a valid question Dr. O. I mean Ariel was a mermaid and then she had a human baby."
"Ariel is also a cartoon." Said Tommy. "By the way at the end of the first movie her dad turned her human. Next question." The class laughed at his response.
"Dr. O.? How do you know that?" Said one of the girls.
"I have a 3 year old and that movie doesn't leave the dvd player in my car and in my living room. If it does well let's just say Ursula is mild compared to a 3 year old who won't go to sleep without it. Another reason why you guys don't want kids right now good luck doing homework. I graded your papers last night with Teresa on my lap singing the entire score to Lion King last night."
"Is that why you wrote 'SIMBA' on my paper?" Said one of the soccer players.
"I got 'Hakuna Matata'." Said another boy.
"Sorry Guys." Said Tommy with a smile.
"Hey no problem I got a picture of I think a lion on mine?" Said one of the girls. Tommy knew there was one that Teresa drew on.
"Where was your wife?" Asked one of the female students.
"She had girls' night out. Next box question 'what came first the chicken or the egg?' Guys I'm a scientist not a philosopher. I honestly don't know. Next question, finally one a little more serious 'if I use the pull out method the chick won't get pregnant right?' First of all they are called women or ladies or even girls you call a woman chick in this context be prepared to sleep alone curled up with your child's stuffed animal. Yes I woman can get pregnant even if you 'pull out'. 'If we ran out of condoms can I use saran wrap?' What?! Listen please do not use saran wrap and if you can't afford condoms, you can't afford a pregnancy test, and you can't afford a baby. Trust me we pay $200 a week for daycare/school. Can you afford that, I know I couldn't when I was your age and I had a job teaching martial arts. I went through 2 cars before I graduated."
"You crashed 2 cars?" Asked one of the boys.
"No I just picked a really lousy parking space the first time and it got crushed under one of the Power Rangers robot. And the second time I blew it up in the desert." Tommy was still upset about Adam crushing his first jeep with the damn frog zord. "I had to save my money to get both of them. 'Is there a law against joining the mile high club?' No there isn't but really? Have you seen the bathrooms on a plane it's smaller than the supply closet, it's a latrine at best and you are sharing that bathroom with about 100 or more other people this question just based on the handwriting is male. So Buddy good luck getting your girl in one for sex." The girls were all a little grossed out and saying 'no way in hell'. "
Tommy finished out the class and then headed home to his wife and daughter. Kim had been nursing a hangover when he left that morning but now seemed better.
"Hey how was work?" Kim said kissing him.
"Good we finished the sex talk."
"Learn anything?"
"Nothing I didn't already know and I prevented a few children from being born. Someone asked if saran wrap could be used."
"How would you keep it on? Never mind I don't want to know, I prefer our methods."
"Of what trying to finish before the baby wakes up?" He asked with a laugh.
"Exactly."