Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN LEVIATHAN! IT IS AN AMZING BOOK WRITTEN BY SCOTT WESTERFELD
Bovril was alone at the Zoologoical Society in Alek's room. They had all left on a mission and wouldn't be back until 3 days later. Bovril had nothing to do; he couldn't scare Volger, perch on Deryn or Alek's shoulder or even talk with Dr. Barlow's loris.
An idea came to Bovril's head. He always had ideas of how to annoy everyone on the Leviathan, but he never wrote them down.
Bovril scampered his way to the computer and opened a new document.
The first person to annoy was Deryn Sharp.
20 Ways to Annoy Deryn Sharp
1. Tell her that the Leviathan is no place for a girl
2. Call her Mr. Sharp
3. Replace all her trousers with skirts
4. Tell her that Newkirk is her lover
5. Tease her about liking Alek
6. Tell her Volger is her long lost father
7. Tell her Dr. Barlow is her future self
8. Give her hard-boiled eggs that look like potatoes
9. Whenever she is with Alek play "Can you feel the love tonight?"
10. When she is sleeping put bright blue eye shadow and bright red lipstick on her
11. Tell her she is be thrown off the airship immediately unless she makes you a sandwich
12. Tell her Fitzroy is madly in love with her
13. Tell her that Lilit is Alek's lover
14. Tell Deryn that she has as much air sense as a message lizard
15. Tell Deryn that the Leviathan doesn't exist and she is going bonkers
16. Tell her that Volger is her uncle
17. Follow her around and say "Barking Spiders! I didn't know a girl could do that!" to everything she does, then quickly hide
18. When she is sleeping draw a pair of goggles on her forehead
19. Tell her that Alek is her brother
20. Tell her that Alek and Newkirk are lovers and that Alek was only with Deryn to make Newkirk jealous
Bovril smiled at his work. He saved the file and started a new one.
But who is the next victim?
Bovril smiled as he typed in Alek's name.