A/N so yes this is my first fanfic and I'm open to all feedback, negative and positive, so tell me your honest opinion, I won't take it personally. Let the story begin
CLARY POV
I had known Jace for so long, yet I had never seen this side of him. Well yes, there had been these nightmares about his abusive father, who had murdered his mother in front of Jace and then shot himself, that happening too under the eyes of the 10-year old Jace. When those nights came, he'd wake up all scared and weak, but he always got through it, and wouldn't let me comfort him. But there he was, sitting on our bed his back against the wall and knees against his chest. I couldn't see the angelic face of his because he had buried his face to his hands. All I could hear was the light sobs of my boyfriend as I slowly walked to him. He didn't even lift his head, but I was sure he had noticed my arrival. He had had to notice. Yet he still slightly flinched as I touched his golden hair, and lifted his face slowly from his hands. I could see his eyes were red from crying and his cheeks were wet from the tears that still flooded from his eyes. I wondered what should I do and decided to hug Jace. Hi buried his face to my shoulder and started shaking. He was clearly in shock about something and I was quite worried because this was anything but normal. The roles had been the other way so many times. So many times I had cried to his shirt. So many times we had cuddled because I was sad. This situation was so new to me. Of course Simon had opened up to me, but it hadn't been like this. Not this intimate. I was still thinking what should I do with my broken boyfriend so I decided to pull him down to our bed and lay down next to him. "What is it?" I asked as I wrapped my hands tightly against him. I didn't get an answer till few minutes, when he stopped shaking and mumbled "I don't know Clary, I don't know. I just thought about everything. How shitty I am, how shitty father I will be to the child you want so much, how you probably don't even really like me and that you will leave me some day. Because I won't really know what I will do if you go." "Well, there's one thing for sure, and it's that you will never find out what it's like to live without me. I will never leave you, Jace, you should know that." The golden boy had lifted his face from my shoulder and was looking me straight to my eyes. The gaze I saw in his eyes was so weak and for this little moment he seemed to be just a little boy who just wanted to be loved. I pressed a light kiss to his soft lips and said "Why would you think I would leave you?" "Because of the nightmares and stuff like that. Because I'm weak. How could I protect you if I can't even protect myself from my inner demons. Who would you want someone like this. How can you love me Clary" he said quietly and looked away. I was shocked when I realised what he had just said. The mighty, always confident Jace Herondale had just said that he was weak. I looked at him as he curled up to a small bun and started shaking again. I had to do something. I started drawing little circles ln Jace's back and humming his favourite songs. Slowly the shaking stopped but he wouldn't come out of his core, so I took his hand and squeezed it lightly. "Jace. You know you don't have to be perfect, or anything but yourself. We will get over this together, and I will help you. But you have to talk to me, if you feel like you're weak or something like that. Okay?" "Okay", said a small voice that came from the small ball next to me. "Right now I feel weak, and I want you to help me. I want you to lay next to me, I want you to chase away all my nightmares, and I want you to be here with me so I can rely on you if I need to", he said as he started opening up and reached a hand towards me. I took his hand and pulled him to my lap where he closed his eyes and slowly drifted to sleep. I think that this night he didn't have nightmares.
I hope you enjoyed this fic and I would be really thankful for all of your feedback, even if it's about bad grammar ( English isn't my first language) or that the story wasn't good. I'm also considering on taking this to a two-shot, the other chapter would be this story on Jace's POV, so I would like to hear your thoughts about that.