Note: I felt like writing something, so here it is :) Contains just a few swear words and the cover picture is from Tumblr. Hope you like this ^^
-This Space In Between Us-
Elsa- 25th November
"Hey, don't worry alright?" Jack traces his fingertips along my jawline tenderly, I try to push away the sense of longing starting to creep up within me. Six months is a lot of time, I don't know how long I can hold up this dam that's threatening to crumble any second now, releasing the flow of tears and protests I've been holding up since two weeks ago when he told me he was leaving, going on tour, in fact for half a year.
The paparazzis will be over here any minute, our last chance of goodbye had to be hurried and in haste, which was both a blessing and a curse. We promised no tears here in the airport, the both of us being strong haters of cheesy movie scenes and swearing never to live one in real life. Maybe I'd change my mind after this, I don't know what to think anymore.
"I'll be here for you, I won't forget about you."
"I won't forget about you either." He smiled, his eyes unreadable, our maybe I'm just too distracted by this very moment to notice anything else. "I'll talk to you whenever I can, I promise." He presses his lips to mine in a soft kiss, pushing my hair away from my face when Nicholas, his personal assistant walks over and tells him to leave before the whole press team comes along and disturbs him before the flight. He lowers his jacket hood and puts on a pair of shades, placing one final kiss on my left cheek before briskly walking away.
Couldn't stop him even if I wanted to, he has to live his dream, and I have to go to college. Don't be selfish.
I
Elsa- 18th January
Was it Australia, the other day? Or was it New Zealand? Where is he now, I have no idea.
I don't know what to think anymore.
Geography wasn't my best subject, neither was it my favourite, and now it's just a huge pain to even think about. The single sight of a world map has caused me to feel this empty, hollowness in my heart, reminding me of every square mile in between us, causing my heart to ache but to which I can't find a single remedy. His texts are short, brief, Skype calls ridiculously early in the morning, fatigue evident in every inch of his face. I'd like to think he's living his dream in cities he's only ever dreamed of visiting, fluorescent lights blinding him for moment after fleeting moment, hopefully numbing his pain, if it was anywhere near what I was feeling every minute of every day.
"Elsa, sometimes it's hard but you have to understand he has a job to do, dreams to fulfill. Just...remember every passing day means you're yet another day closer to seeing him again." She slides in beside me, deep chocolate brown hair in an elegant updo. Jack was always awed at how she managed to do that every morning. I smiled at my mother, "I know, not to worry. I'm just fine." I nod slowly.
"Anna doesn't tell you about it but she's really worried about you too, so do let her know you're okay if you say so," She rests an arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer towards her. "Your father and I will be going to Spain for our honeymoon soon, I hope your okay with that." She knows I'm okay with that, not that we were especially close. Since I began taking care of myself independently I hardly ever talked to her anymore. I wouldn't feel any less lonelier without her for one week.
I grin. "It's okay. I've got Anna to keep me company. You two enjoy yourselves while your there." She laughs lightly and switches on the television, thus ending our conversation.
"Hey! Don't tell me you're watching The Voice without me! Daniel is a total hottie, I'm so not missing his performance." Anna bursts into the living room and jumps in beside me, the bare sight of her improving my mood just a little bit, but all the same it was curing my heartache for him bit by bit. Hopefully.
I
Elsa- 1st February
It wasn't raining at all, but the gloominess hung in the air between us, as heavy and unbearable as ever. I tightened my black coat around me, Anna weeping silently beside me. But I have no words of comfort to offer her. I don't even know how to react to this.
My father and mother were buried side by side, as they'd always wanted. It was an accident. That was all the details they'd have to offer.
Over some ocean I didn't dare to look up on the map in case it would worsen my heartache. Pilot lost control, plane crashed. End of story. Condolences offered but it all honestly made no difference to the now gaping hole in my heart, in my mind, in my soul. I frowned.
We stood there for what seemed like eternity, the pleasantly cool air almost mocking me, mocking all of us. I hate it.
Maybe if I cried it would help to ease the sense of guilt in my heart and ache. Guilt for being preoccupied with missing Jack while she was still here. Ache for losing another of the few people I was certain I loved.
We headed back into Tianna, a friend of mine's car. A bright lime green convertible filled with pillows varying in quality and age, design and colour. She was probably my closest friend, and chose to keep quiet just when I needed her to. I leaned and relaxed against the beige car seat, slipping out my phone and noticed a missed call from Jack and a text.
Can't wait to see you ;) Hoping to God you're going to kiss me real hard when I get back. Miss you a lot x Jack
I wasn't exactly mad at him for not being here, nor was I particularly cheerful after going through a funeral on Saturday morning. I was numb, lacking emotion whatsoever. Or maybe I just don't know what to think anymore.
Idk how to say this, but things have changed. Just give me some time to recover, I'll be fine. Don't worry, don't ask. x Elsa
I slid my handphone back in my pocket. Being Jack, he continued texting me and attempting to call my number, ignoring my request to not query a single thing. I decided to switch it off in the end. And breathe.
Just breathe.
I
Elsa- 2nd April
The dam broke. Sooner or later it had to break, I knew it. But because I was selfish and stupid, I decided to lay the burden on Jack. The one person who I didn't want to worry.
I was crying, he was worried. I answered his questions, he asked more.
"I'm so, so sorry, Elsa." The line was breaking, I didn't know where he is, but he didn't seem in a hurry.
"I'm just, so tired of all of this, the different timezones, my parents, you, just everything. I miss you a lot." I suck in a breath and rub my eyes with my fists. I broke my own promise to myself to stay strong, but fuck it anyways. It's not like I haven't disappointed myself in some time.
"I miss you a lot too. I love you, you know that?" The line is fuzzy. I'm a mess.
"It hurts." I bite my lip to prevent myself from howling in my room, restraining cries of pain to silent sobs so Anna won't know about this. She's already going through a lot, I don't need her worrying over her elder sister. This one small thing I better be able to do.
"I know." He remains silent for a moment. I hold back my sobs, tears running down my face uncontrollably, but minimum sounds made. At least one thing is going right tonight.
"I shouldn't have left you, damn it, I'm so sorry, I keep fucking things up, I-" I press my eyelids together tightly, running a hand through my hair.
"No,no. Jack. It's no-it's not your fault." I suck in some air. "I didn't call you to make you apologize, and I don't want you to do it. Ju-just, let me hear your voice. I miss you, I miss you." I've cried so much my blankets are soggy and warm now, smelling of salt. Now I'm just a dried up, wrinkly grape. Still a mess, but at least I'm feeling better.
He sings into the phone, softly, calming. Somehow without him I manage to fall asleep in my own bed, the best sleep I've had in months. I woke up after a period of time, phone still clamped tightly in my hand, sticky from tears. "Hello?"" I whisper tentatively, I don't expect a reply, but he gives me one.
"Hi, love. How are you now?" His voice is shaky, broken even. I close my eyes. "Never been better. You should get some rest, what were you doing still on the phone after I stopped talking?"
"I miss you, just listening to the sounds you make while you were asleep. Writing a new song based off the rhythm of your breathing." I sense a hint of mischief in his tone and a smile tugs at my lips immediately. "I can't wait to hear your next single, must be a hit."
I hear his smile through the phone, "definitely."
I
Elsa- 23th May
One more day. One more day and this six months of torture would finally end.
I
Elsa-24th May
I woke up somewhere in the middle of the night, a fuzzy line between the day before and tomorrow. I fell into unconsciousness again.
I woke up once more, after a certain period of time which I cannot determine. I look around and hear a steady 'thud' on my window every half minute. Could it be him? Or was it my befuddled mind playing tricks on me yet again? I don't know what to think anymore.
I walk over and look out my window. In the faint glow of the streetlamp outside our house, I could clearly make out the figure of Jack Frost. Back home from his tour, right in front of my house clearly reenacting one of the most overused romantic scenes in novels and movies. But I couldn't be happier. Finally, after six whole months the only thing separating us was a bare windowsill instead of timezones, broken lines and thousands of miles.
I push open the window and lean outside, beaming. "Hey,"
He looks up at me, grinning. "Hey."
Note: This was really exhausting to write, gosh xD I had to get in that sad mood to actually be able to write this one-shot, which isn't even that long. A big thank you to you, random person reading this, I love you just to know that you actually read all the way here, I'm touched. Or maybe you skipped it to read the end, then go back to wherever you were just now. But I still love you nonetheless :)
Thank you, once again~
xTheProfessionalFangirlx