Where Love Grows Wild

By: Liv-x-Lex4Ever & E. Scribbles

Chapter 1: Mama's Boy

Olivia was sat at her desk, flipping through a file with frustration when her phone rang. Finally Elliot had decided to get out of bed. "Elliot? Go to-"

"Sorry, it's ah, Melanie." There was a long pause as Olivia frowned, trying to place the name. "Melanie, your baby sitter. We haven't actually met yet, but ah, I've tried to get into contact with Casey, and her phone is switched off. One of the children is sick and she told me to call one of you if ever that happened..."

"Who's sick?" she asked. "How? What's wrong? I think Casey's in court."

"Adam. He has a bit of a fever and he's very teary. He said he wants to go home."

"Is he vomiting or any of the sort?"

"No, but he's asking for his mum and...well, I have my sister's kids here today, and I don't want them to get sick as well..."

Olivia nodded, walking toward the captain's office. "Is Sasha sick too?"

"Doesn't seem to be. She's fast asleep at the moment."

She sighed in relief. "Good. I'll talk to the captain and call you right back," she said, closing the phone and knocking on the door.

"Come in." The captain looked up, taking his glasses off. "What can I do for you, Olivia?"

She walked in, closing the door. "I, uh, need some time. The babysitter called and Adam's running a bit of a fever. She can't get a hold of Casey either. Is there any way...?"

He sighed, then gave a bit of a smile. "You know, he's four now, isn't he? And this is the first time you've asked me. I'm hardly going to say no."

She nodded, smiling. "Thank you. If he's still sick tomorrow I'll call," she said, redialing the babysitter. "Melanie? It's Olivia Benson. I'm on my way. Could you get Sasha ready too please?" she asked as she threw her coat on.

By the time she reached the babysitter's door, having found the address entered into her phone by Casey, she could hear crying inside, and when she knocked, a flustered younger woman opened the door. "You must be Olivia." She pushed Sasha into her arms and then disappeared inside the house.

Olivia gently pulled her into her arms, rocking her as she walked in. "Shh, shh, it's okay. It's okay. Mommy's here," she said walking into the house, smiling as Sasha sucked on two fingers quietly, bouncing her gently.

Adam was curled up in an armchair, and when he saw Olivia, he looked hopefully behind her, then his face fell before he curled up again. Melanie spoke quietly. "I told him you were coming. He said he didn't want you, he wanted Casey."

She sighed, whispering, "He usually does. He...bonded with her quicker, easier." She walked over to him, dropping to her knees and ruffling his hair. "Hey buddy."

"I want Mama. I feel sick."

She bit her lip. "Mama's working on important stuff right now," she said, feigning a smile, though her heart was breaking little by little. "How 'bout I take you and your sister home?"

"Can we go see her at work?" He made no move towards her.

"Well, if you're not feeling good. I think we should just go home."

Tears began shining in his eyes. "I want to see her. I don't want to go home with you!"

Olivia bit her lip, sighing, "If we do, just for a few minutes, then will you come home with me? I'm your mommy too."

He looked at her almost suspiciously before nodding, but refused to hold her hand on the way down to the car and got angry with her when she tried to carry the backpack containing their things. "I carry it! I always do!"

She put her hand up, transferring Sasha to her shoulder. "Okay, okay. You're a big boy."

Sasha just gurgled happily in her ear, her hands playing with Olivia's badge.

Olivia pulled her tiny hands away. "No, baby, just a minute," she turned around. "Thanks Melanie!" she said, opening the back door and buckling Sasha into her car seat before handing her old badge that was in the console to occupy her. The edges were worn down, no longer sharp. She closed the door, going to the other side and opening it as Adam climbed into his car seat.

He refused to speak with her on the way to Casey's office, but his face became paler, and by the time they reached there, he held up his arms for her to carry him.

Olivia picked him up, after unbuckling the car seat, putting it over her arm, a sleeping Sasha inside it, sucking on the medal. "I love you," she whispered in his ear, making her way up the steps. "Maybe 1Mama has something to make you feel better, huh?"

He nodded, resting his warm forehead on her shoulder. Casey's office was empty when they reached it, but they'd only just opened the door before Adam was sick on the carpet.

She sighed, dialing Elliot. "I-have a situation. I brought the kids to see Casey. Casey's not in, Adam was just sick on the carpet, Sasha's sleeping in her car seat on my arm...God, I need help!"

Elliot gave a quiet laugh. "I'll be right there."

Olivia walked into the restroom with them, setting the car seat on the floor as she sat Adam on the counter. Quickly, she wet a paper towel after ridding him of his shirt. "Do you need me to carry you?"

He shook his head, but made no move.

She sighed. "Adam, you know I'm your Mommy too, right?" she asked, blotting his face with the wet towel.

"No you're not. You're never at home."

"I work. So does your Mama. I just...I have to be away more. But I love you more than you know. You're such a good little boy," Olivia pulled the trashcan closer to him.

He looked at her suspiciously again. "You never come in and say goodnight to me. And sometimes you don't have breakfast with me. Mama always does."

She sighed. "When I come home you're usually sleeping. I don't like waking you..."

"I wouldn't mind..."

"You love me, right? I sure love you," she said, caressing his face, noticing his temperature had risen. "Honey, we really should get you home..."

"Can't I just sit in Mama's chair and wait for her? Then she can come home too."

"Honey, you just threw up. You need to be in bed with a rag on your head. But," she looked at her watch, "it is about a quarter to noon, she should be back soon. How about we go sit for a few minutes? You can sit in my lap, your sister on the desk. Do you still feel like you're gonna be sick?"

He shook his head, and after looking at her suspiciously again, he gave a nod.

They'd been sitting there a few minutes when his eyes began to drift shut, but he woke when Elliot walked into the room.

"What...oh. You called me to clean up the sick?"

Adam was out of Olivia's lap and throwing his arms around Elliot a second later.

Olivia stood up. "Either that or I can while you look after them," she sighed.

He picked up Adam. "Hey, they're your kids, so technically it's your vomit. Clean away, little lady."

She sighed, nodding. She walked into the janitor's closet, grabbing a few old rags and some cleaner before walking back in. She dropped to her knees, cleaning it up, throwing the paper towels away before spraying the solvent on the mess, looking back as she heard a click clack.

Casey leaned against the wall, a smile on her face when she saw nothing but Olivia's bum poking out of her office. "The amount of times I've dreamt about this..."

Olivia looked up, sighing. "Probably not cleaning up vomit, I bet."

Casey wrinkled her nose. "Do I want to ask whose? You haven't brought me another drunk have you? It's only midday!"

Olivia wiped the carpet. "Have you even checked your phone? Melanie called me to pick up the kids."

"Called YOU?" That was all she managed to get out before Adam banged into her, wrapping his arms around her, then was sick on her suit.

Olivia pulled him off of her, wiping her mouth with a clean rag. "Aaaaaaaand now you see why. Come on, buddy, let's get you cleaned up, but first, apologize to Mama."

He just gave Casey a small smile. "Bet you've been waiting to do that, haven't you?"

His smile widened at her words, then he let out a giggle as Casey pretended to peg her nose.

Sasha began to cry from her spot on Casey's desk. "Can you...? I have no clue where Elliot got to."

Casey slipped off her jacket as she walked into her office. Adam tried to follow her, then went reluctantly with Olivia into the bathroom again.

Olivia lifted him onto the counter again, cleaning him off. "You, mister, are going to have a bath tonight."

"..Will you be home?"

She nodded. "Mm-hmm. I took the rest of the day off to be with you, but Mama still has to work. Is that okay with you?"

"..You won't have to go to work and leave us alone?"

She shook her head. "When have I ever done that?"

"You leave all the time, but Mama is there. If she's not there, you'll have to leave us alone and I'm not tall enough to get Sasha out of her cot."

Olivia sighed. "I have to leave. Other kids depend on me to help them, but I would never, ever leave unless someone else was there. I'd never leave you two alone."

"Do you like other kids better than us?"

Olivia reached a finger under his chin. "Of course not. You two will always be my favorites. Why do you ask that?"

"...Last week, Mama took us to the park, and you were there with another boy. You hugged him for ages, and then you pushed him on the swings. You haven't even ever taken me to the park."

Olivia sighed. Calvin had stopped by the precinct to say hi. The next Saturday, they were at the park. Casey volunteered to stay home, but had brought them there at some point. "That's Calvin. He's a boy I helped. We...got to be really good friends. Would you like to meet him sometime? I bet he would come to the park with us."

Adam gave a small shrug. "Can we go home now? I'm tired."

"I thought you didn't want to go home with me?"

Tears shimmered in his eyes, then big plops of them began to fall. "My tummy hurts!"

She picked him up, carrying him to an open stall, locking it behind them. She sat next to him, rubbing his back as he was on his knees. "It's gonna be okay. I promise."

When he'd been sick again, he clung to Olivia and, by time they got back to Casey's office, he was asleep in her arms, his own wrapped loosely around her neck. Casey had given up trying to clean her jacket and was blotting gently at her shirt.

Olivia walked in, resting against the doorframe. "Sorry. He wouldn't go with me unless we came to see you," she said, biting her lip, adjusting him in her arms.

"She normally calls one of our neighbors if she can't get a hold of me. They must have been out." With a sigh, she gave up on her shirt as well and turned to look around her office to see if she had a spare. "I can call someone else if you need to get back to work."

Olivia shook her head. "Casey, it's hurting them. I'm...away too much. I'll take them. I've got the rest of the day off. And why didn't you discuss the babysitter with me when I got home? I know I work late, but..."

"I did, Olivia. You were reading over some file you'd brought home, and you said whoever I picked would be fine. You told me to put her number and address in your phone and you'd check up on her at work."

She sat in a chair, being careful not to wake him. "You did? I don't remember. Everything's been running together for so long, Case," she sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm thinking of specifying hours to be home more, at least until both kids are in school. I...need to be there. I'm missing too much. Adam prefers you because you're around more. I work all hours."

Casey gave a sigh and returned to blotting her top. "You tried that before, it didn't work. You just spent the whole time on your phone and it upset him even more because he wanted to talk to you and play with you and you were too busy."

"I know and that was wrong," she sighed. "I'll put my foot down this time. God, listen to me! Next thing I know, you'll be taking the kids on the next flight out. I want to be there! There's got to be some medium, right? How do you do it?"

"..I think about all the kids we've seen through here, then I look at these guys...and I fight until I get what I want and what they need."

Olivia looked at her, numb to the tears beginning to spill. "Why can't I do that? I-I want to and th-they're enough people on the squad to where I don't have to be there all the time. Casey, I'm surprised you haven't left with them for someone more reliable. I feel horrible..."

Casey moved towards her, drying her tears and dropping a kiss to her cheek. "Liv, they love you. I love you. So what if you're not around a lot, at least it's not because you're off drinking somewhere or off with someone else. Yes, you should be with us more often, but I knew what you'd be like before we ever agreed to have them ok, and I don't regret it. Ever."

She sighed, taking her hand. "I want to be here more though. I want him to want to run to me when I pick him up...like he does to you."

"But he does other things for you he'd never do for me. Every night before bed he asks me what you've been doing all day, and won't go to sleep until I tell him you're ok and you'll be home soon.

"Sometimes in the morning he tries to wake up extra early so he will be awake before you, and he comes into our room and strokes your hair and tells you all about his day before you wake up, in case you have to leave quickly.

"He's even as suspicious as you. He asked to check the pizza man's card last time he delivered and he wrote down the number on the little black book he carries in his pocket, just like yours."

She laughed, grinning. "Yeah. Last bit sounds like me, but still. I wish I felt him stroking my hair and heard him telling me about his day. It'd be nice. I wouldn't even mind it if he climbed in our bed."

"He won't, in case it wakes you. He says you need your rest. And you know, I think little Sasha here has saved a special poopy nappy for you."

She grinned. "Not this time. I'm occupado. You take it, Mommy."

Casey wrinkled her nose, grabbing the diaper bag and disappeared to the bathroom with Sasha.

Author's Note: What do you think?

Thanks to my Beta:Tiger(dot)Lily(dot)Weasley(dot)757

Please read & review!

Liv-x-Lex4Ever & E. Scribbles